IMPORTANT AN:

Hello everyone.
Welcome to my story, or well possibly my story. I have spent the past few months writing this out and I've decided to use this first chapter as an experiment. I'm still not sure if I want to keep this as a fanfiction or if I actually want to attempt writing a book, so I've decided that to ask any person who reads this for their help. Do you think I should ry to make something out of this in the real world or keep it as a fanfiction? If it does become a fanfiction updates may be slow since I'm in college and really want to put my all in each chapter. I want to do better then I did with my other story. I would also greatly appreciate any tips or friendly criticism as I truly want to improve my writing, and I know the best way is by having other point of views analyze my work. Thank you to everyone whose reading!

WARNINGS: This story is leaning towards being dark and might be hard to read for some and could be triggering to those who have been through any form of abuse including domestic abuse. Please be cautious while read and please stop if it is too much for you I don't want to harm anyone with my work so please please please read with caution.

Now, on to the chapter!

I let out a sigh as my head rested against the locker, mentally preparing myself for the day ahead.

Surrounding me, other teenagers around my age are chattering away. Some jocks running through the halls and some of the girls squealing as they see their friends for the first time since the beginning of Christmas break.

After a moment of just standing there, trying to create my own little bubble, I finally pull myself together and open up my locker wishing that the break could've lasted longer.

Of course it never would.

My first instinct is to flinch when I feel arms encircling my torso, however, after a year of practice I've learned to supresse these reactions and to allow my body melt into the person behind me. He would appreciate my attempt on going along with his twisted fantasy.

He leans in close to my ear inhaling the scent of my skin as he tightens his hold on me, a clear enough warning.

"Did you miss me?" his hot breathe washes over my face as he says this and I can already feel my muscles tensing in unease.

I slowly turn myself around while still in his arms, my body automatically reaching up to wrap my hands around his neck as I stand on my tip toes to give him a chaste kiss, putting on my best smile.

He looks deep into me eyes as I land back on my heels, still keeping a tight hold on me. "Of course I missed you silly, you know how much I love you." I say as I play with his hair keeping any negative emotions from surfacing to the view of those around us.

A large grin forms on his face afterwards, however his eyes don't quite match the expression. I can see his satisfaction, his smugness through his facade and I have to hold back my desire to slap it away.

Just before either of us could say anything else I hear a familiar voice call out his name causing him to finally turn away from me.

"Yo Sebastian! How was your break man?"

Johnathon Fray was the opposite of my "Boyfriend" Sebastian Verlac in almost every possible way. While Sebastians more dominant features were dark, ranging from his eyes/hair all the way to his hidden personality, Johnathan was all white blonde hair, bright green eyes and a sunshine aura to him. He had a smile that could light up a room and cause you to grin alongside him.

However, even though Sebastians true nature isn't as warm as Johnathons he could be charming to the point where even I believe, even if it's just for a few seconds, that he is just as kind of a person. It's what I believed him to be when I first met him, however that quickly changed when I went on my first date with him.

Something to know about him before I start the story that began this entire mess is that Sebastian is a year older then I am, making him a Junior while I'm a sophomore. His family is crazy rich and has an unlimited influence in our little town of Alicante, his parents however are never home. They're always away on business trips around the world and have left Sebastian behind in a large mansion and multiple credit cards with no limit, making him a person who has never had to hear the word no.

I, on the other hand, come from a middle class family and am an only child living with my mothers best friend Luke who is also often away on business to do with with his bookstore. At a point in time a few years ago my parents had decided to randomly draft up their will, claiming that they wanted to be prepared for any scenario, and had named Luke my legal Guardian since neither had any living relatives. Then a week later as they were returning home with takeout food for dinner their car caught on fire and exploded in the middle of the road killing both of them instantly. They could never find an exact cause for the explosion, and it didn't matter to me either way. Knowing the cause wouldn't suddenly bring them back.

I met Sebastian during my freshman year of high school.

At the time I had thought that I was the one to notice him first. How couldn't I? He was the star player to our schools baseball team. He was faster then any of the other players, much stronger too. He was all dark in a mysterious way, a welcoming aura surrounding him as he laughed with his friends. At the time his eyes sparkled, and his height of 6 foot 2 had dazzled me compared to my meager 5'2". I had truly believed that he was the greatest person in our school.

Oh how wrong I was. A week before winter break he had approached me, to say I was shocked was an understatement. Why would the all great and mighty Sebastian approach me? I was just a nerdy freshman who's only friend consisted of a lanky dorky Simon Lewis who in every way, except by blood, was my brother.

When he got to our usual lunch table he had taken a seat next to me and introduced himself to the both of us, his charming smile disarming me on the spot. As time ticked on more and more people started joining us in that lunch hour, but Sebastians attention never strayed away from me. When the warning bell rang he had offered to take me to one of the few classes I didn't have with or near Simon, Art.

I was quick to agree and fell into step beside him as we made a stop to my locker before continuing to the stairs to take us to the third floor where the Art rooms were, chatting with each other the entire way.

He had been so.. attentive. Seeming as though he was captivated by my every word, no matter how mundane the topic. Asking questions at the right time, giving his own comments and nodding along he looked to be the perfect listener. And as dropping me off at the door of my classroom he made the promise that he would be there when the bell rang. And, he was.

This pattern continued for the rest of the week and I couldn't help but feel elated. THE most charming, handsome and popular guy at school was diverting all of attention to me, me of all people. I felt so so special.

On the final day of winter break he walked me to his car, wanting to drop me home. It was such a gentlemanly gesture, and definitely an offer that I was going to accept. I hated riding the school bus and Simon was already on his way to he airport with his mom and sister.

The ride back was fun. He let me choose the music and laughed along as I sang to my favorite songs, quite badly I might add. The ride ended all too soon for my liking so I stayed in the car a little longer, fiddling with the radio stations.

"Clary"

I looked away from the dial as I heard Sebastian call my name. His eyes were both intense and soft at the same time, his body turned and leaning towards me.

"Yes?"

He stared at me for what seemed like for ever, taking he time to analyze every visible part of me, staring into my eyes for a majority of that time. Almost, almost as if he was searching for something.

Finally he opened his mouth, sounding so confident that even if I wasn't basically head over heels for him I would've agreed.

"Go out with me"

And so I did, three times a weeks throughout the entirety of our Christmas break.

By the time school rolled back around I still wasn't sure where we were. Were we officially dating? Was he my boyfriend? Or was I just a way for him to pass the time? What if he acted as if I didn't exist again and everything was a lie? I would be a laughing stalk.

All of these thoughts were wreaking havoc on my mind as I locked the front door of my little two bedroom home when suddenly, I heard the sound of a car door opening.

Slowly I turned around, and I couldn't stop the ear splitting smile that took up half of my face as I see Sebastian standing by the passenger side of his car holding the door open, a gentle smile on his lips.

On that day, every head turned our way as we walked through the halls side by side between every class with his arm around my shoulder. Whispers could be heard all around the cafeteria, as failed discreet looks focused on our new table in the center of the room. Everything seemed to be new, even all of my 'friends' with Simon out of sight, having moved to a different state after his mother got a job offer she couldn't refuse.

It was all perfect.

Which should've been my first clue as to how wrong I was.

When summer break arrived we were still going strong, so impossibly happy. Luke had to leave to Europe for the entire summer which left me to do as I pleased. I ended up spending everyday over at Sebastians, swimming at his pool and spending nights in his home theatre.

Then came the 4th of July, a holiday I doubt I'll ever be able to celebrate again.

He threw a barbecue party with all of his guy friends making me the only female there. Should've been ok for me to socialize and joke around with them right?

Wrong.

Later on in the evening when only his most loyal friends (Bruce laughty and Micheal wane) remained along with a plus one that decided to wait until the fireworks show ended, that plus one, the drunk Scott, made the mistake of picking me up and spinning me around in his arms as I tried to get my phone back.

All of hell broke loose then. I was immediately yanked out of Scotts arms and thrown to the floor, the beer bottle that he was holding shattering. It's broken pieces digging themselves into my hip as I landed on top of them.

At first I couldn't comprehend what was really happening, to focused on the sharp sting the glass was causing as it tried to lodge into my skin. Then when I looked up to find Sebastian for help I finally understood.

Bruce and Micheal held poor Scott down as Sebastian assaulted him with his fists, landing a few kicks as well. I tried to call out, I truly did, but it felt as if someone had frozen me and only me in time. I couldn't speaks or move, all I could do was stare.

That didn't last long. At some point there was this sound, this sickening crunch that sunk into my soul as Scott's body fell limp, his murderer breathing hard.

Then suddenly, his dark eyes were on me. I felt my body come to life and struggled to stand, determined to get away to safety. I never even made it to his back door before i felt his body tackle mine onto the cold hard ground.

I screamed as he threw me over his shoulder, calling out to his friends as they carried the body over to one of the parked cars, my pleas falling deaf to their ears.

That was the first night he beat me.

It took me a week to recover, and I've never spoken a word of what happened to anyone. He had made his threats clear as he had yanked my head back before backhanding me, and after what I had just witnessed I knew that he would follow through. He had promised not to rape me that night, saying that he wanted my body mature enough before he had me. And thankfully, that promise still holds true to this day.

So since then I have learned to play my role as his beloved girlfriend, always by his side.

The sickest part however isn't any of the torture I have to go through by his hands.

No, the sickest part is that I somehow still fell in love with him.

The man who beats me, degrades me, and over all makes my life a living hell.

The same man that I irrevocably love with all my heart.

"Let's get going"

I blink my eyes as Sebastians whisper brings me back to the present, his hand on my back leading me to the direction of my first class, his other hand on my arm giving a quick but painful pinch.

I nod my head and lean onto him as we walk, trying to pretend that no one is beside me.

That I don't love a monster.