Chapter 19: Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it

Many thanks to ViscountessAberowen! Best Beta Ever!

The first day in the Underworld went by slowly. Zagreus and Nico ambled along next to the river, each trying to strike up conversations that dwindled after a few minutes. The dialogue lagged and they would peter off into silence. The river gurgled quietly beside them, more talkative than either of the sons of Hades. After midday on that first day, Zagreus came to a sudden halt, Nico almost running into him from behind.

Nico looked around in confusion. "Why'd you stop?"

Zagreus frowned and knelt down, fingers tracing the dirt. "Hypnos. He moved away from the river."

"Why would he do that? Isn't he trying to get home? To Nyx?"

Nodding, Zagreus stood and looked in the direction Hypnos' trail led. "I don't know why he would unless..."

Zagreus spun around and froze. "Nico, get away from the river. Now."

A chittering, clicking noise sounded from behind the demigod. Nico swallowed heavily and carefully moved forward. The chittering stopped immediately, and Zagreus threw his packs to the side and yelled out, "Move!"

Nico didn't hesitate. Dropping his bag, he dove forward and rolled onto his shoulder to quickly regain his feet. As he rose, he pulled his blade free from its sheath in one fluid motion. Zagreus already had his sword in his hand, rushing forward to attack.

A creature rose up out of the river behind them. Hundreds of legs clicked and jerked on either side of its long and sinuous body. Segmented sections of armor-like plates protected it, and sharp pincers protruded from what Nico assumed was its head. Long antennae undulated from right above the pincers, and beady eyes glared hatefully at the duo.

Zagreus ducked and slid onto his side as the thing lunged toward him. He brought his blade up and sliced at the creature. It shrieked as several appendages dropped to the ground.

Nico ran forward, his own sword at the ready. The monster writhed and whipped its body in Nico's direction. He brought his sword up as the creature brought its body down. Stygian Iron bit deeply between armored sections, eliciting a screech of pain from the beast. Nico pulled his sword free and spun away, avoiding a reactionary jerk from the insect-like monster.

Nico stopped to catch his breath and assess the situation, but the creature seemed as though it had had enough. Hissing, it sank back into the water until even its antennae disappeared beneath the rapids.

Zagreus stood and, sheathing his blade, brushed the dirt off of his pants and tunic. Nico wiped his own sword on his jeans, a blackish tar-like substance tracing smears over the fabric.

"What was that?" Nico stooped to pick up his bag.

Zagreus shook his head. "No idea. Whatever it was, maybe Hypnos left the river because of it." The god shifted the packs from his mother onto his shoulder better. "Come on. Let's get moving before it decides to come back."

The creature, however, seemed to be a bad omen. The rest of the day passed, marked by minor skirmishes here and there with creatures that Zagreus was not always familiar with. In fact, more often than not, the god had no clue what they faced. Sometimes the things crackled with purple and umber energy and faded away to ash when defeated- if they were defeated. Other times, the creatures seemed normal, even if out of place.

Nico slashed through the last flying creature that looked like a mosquito the size of a grapefruit. It was riddled with purple energy and emitted a high-pitched squeal as it died. Falling to the ground, it crumbled away to ash. Umber flakes seeped into the ground.

The river lay quite a distance away- so far that neither demigod nor god could see it anymore and hadn't been able to for some time. A field of stunted poplar trees rose in the distance. The sons of Hades made a beeline for it, following the meandering trail of the God of Sleep. From behind, they heard a scritching, skittering noise. Each time they looked back, though, they saw nothing. Cautiously, they stopped for a drink of water. Zagreus set his pack down and withdrew a bottle. He uncorked it and took a swig before offering it to Nico, who took it with a nod of thanks. He handed it back to the god and set his own bag down, digging through it until he came up with pen and paper. He zipped his bag closed and made to pull the cap off the pen.

"What are you doing?" Zagreus held the water a hair's breadth away from his lips as he studied Nico curiously.

Nico shrugged. "I just haven't been to this area before. I thought I might as well map it. A bit anyway. Then I can add it to the rest when I get back to the Waystation. I forgot my notebook there."

"You've mapped out areas of the Underworld?"

Nico nodded. "Mostly bits around the palace. And...well, bits from when I was searching for the Doors."

"Ah." Zagreus said nothing more but gave Nico an appraising look before taking another drink. He put the stopper back into the bottle when something caught his eye further back the way they had come. He squinted. "What the...Nico, look over there and tell me what you see."

Still not having uncapped his pen, Nico stared in the direction Zagreus pointed. At first, he thought he was just seeing dust settle. But then...

"Why does the ground look like it's moving?" Nico blinked and tried to understand what he was seeing.

Zagreus hissed, "Because it is. We need to get moving. Stay ahead of whatever that is."

Nico nodded and thrust the pen and paper into his pocket, already hoisting the bag onto his back. "Let's go then. I could do with a little cardio."

The two picked up their pace. Now, however, each time they glanced over their shoulders, the moving ground seemed to get closer and closer. The final time Nico looked back, he realized what followed them and slowed down, disbelief washing over him.

"They're mice, Zagreus. What are mice doing down here?"

"I don't know but let's just keep moving."

Soon the rodents began to overtake them. At first the rodents proved to be a nuisance and both Nico and Zagreus gained the unpleasant experience of stepping on them- their small bodies squelching beneath their shoes with a wet "pop." As the rodents moved over their fallen comrades, they became bigger in size until the matched the size of sewer rats. Their long front teeth gnashed together as the things, bolder now that they were larger, attacked. The creatures pursued the two boys ruthlessly, growing more frenzied as the little nicks and bites on Nico's and Zagreus legs bled lightly.

Nico snarled in frustration as he kicked a rat away and almost fell. "Enough of this!" He looked over to Zagreus. "Catch!" Nico swung his bag through the air and Zagreus reached up one hand to catch it. Nico halted suddenly and turned to face the rising tide of rodents. He held his right hand out in front of him, fingers splayed. The temperature dropped and the rats squeaked in alarm, some trying to swarm Nico while others ran in circles, under and over one another. The ground shuddered. Zagreus, realizing what Nico was trying to accomplish, held his own arm out in much the same manner. The rumbling in the earth increased and then a loud crack! rang through the air. Five paces from the boys, a fissure split the earth, running from side to side as far as either of them could see.

The majority of the rodents were stuck on the side opposite Nico and Zagreus. The two quickly dispatched the remainder of rats on their side with a few well-placed kicks and sweeps of their legs.

Zagreus grinned over at Nico as he caught his breath. "Well, I would say that was a jolly good time. Nothing like a few rats to bring family together."

Snorting, Nico asked, "You and father fight rats often?"

The god explained, "Dear old Demeter sometimes needs help with keeping rodents from harming her crops. Mother likes to bring me along- says it's much like weeding a garden." Zagreus shook his head. "If you ask me, it's just Demeter getting free labor."

Nico shuddered. "No thank you. Can't say I'm a fan of rats. There were way too many in the Labyrinth." Nico frowned. "Nothing quite like these, though. Why do you think they kept getting bigger?"

Zagreus stretched his arms upward until his spine popped. He groaned and said, "No idea. Maybe the larger ones were in back."

Looking across the fissure, Nico studied the rats curiously. They scurried about, milling over themselves. There seemed to be less of them and the ones left looked bigger than the ones they had fought minutes ago. He swallowed nervously.

"You don't think those are big enough to jump over the gap, right?"

Zagreus looked over and cocked his head to one side. "I shouldn't think so. The gap has to be a good six feet across, wouldn't you say?"

Nico said nothing but continued to watch the rats. Their movements, seemingly pointless and without much direction before, now seemed more violent and focused. He peered across the distance, trying to understand what was happening. They looked like they were killing each other.

"Zagreus. Look at this."

Zagreus stopped and peered back the way they came. Nico asked, "What do you supposed they're doing?"

The god walked to the edge of the crevice and halted. It was only a moment before he turned back, pale and worried.

"We need to leave. We've got to get away from here." Zagreus moved quickly and picked up his packs, thrusting Nico's black bag at him. "Now, Nico!"

"What? What can you see that I can't? You're eyes aren't that much better than-"

A guttural roar sounded from across the crack in the earth. Nico turned. The individual rodents- most of them the size of dogs- surged toward one another, tearing into themselves and each other until their flesh littered the ground and their blood watered the dirt. The bloody masses of the dead things began to congeal rapidly and oozed toward one another. Each massacred part quivered, rippling until the blood and bones and sinew and organs formed on giant skinless rat the size of a pick-up truck.

"Run, Nico!"

He didn't need to be told a third time.

The two boys beat a hasty retreat and the horrid aggregation of flesh swelled and heaved its massive bulk after them, a gelatinous form in the vague shape of a rat. Once they reached the tree line, the creature shrieked and screeched in frustration, forced between letting the two escape or taking the time to disassemble itself into smaller individual parts.

Zagreus pulled Nico into a large niche in a tree quite a ways into the woods- and hissed at Nico to remain quiet. Huddled together, Zagreus closed his eyes and washed them in shadow so that, when the thing passed by as a smaller squad- about five of the creatures now the size of large dogs-it did not notice them. Although the pen and paper in Nico's pocket dug unpleasantly into his thigh, he remained as still as Zagreus. The god maintained the shadows that hid them until they were sure the beast was far enough away to have lost them.

They extracted themselves from the hollow knot in the tree when Nico looked up and, to his horror, saw several bats the size of large children perched in the tree. Each had one large yellow and red eye fixed directly on the two sons of Hades. Pus-like saliva dripped from their gray teeth, and bits of mottled fur crusted over their shoulders and necks. Purple energy crackled over the creatures' leathery skin.

Without making any sudden movements, Nico reached over and tugged on Zagreus' shirt. Zagreus flapped a hand in Nico's direction. "Stop. The bag's stuck."

Nico didn't say anything but tugged harder on Zagreus' shirt.

Zagreus gave an exasperated sigh and turned with raised eyebrows to Nico. "What?"

Nico simply pointed upward. Zagreus followed the direction Nico's finger indicated. His eyes widened once they lit upon the bat-like creatures. "What in the name of Olympus are those?"

Nico slowly reached for the sword at his side, but Zagreus shook his head and placed his hand atop Nico's, effectively stilling the other demigod's movements. "If they feel threatened, they might attack." Nico nodded minutely. Zagreus breathed out quietly and spoke under his breath. "I'm going to try to get the bags. Keep an eye."

Zagreus moved- painstakingly slow- toward their belongings. Nico's bag was behind the packs that Persephone had given them. Looking over the bags, the son of the goddess realized that one of the straps had become wrapped around an odd shelf of bark jutting up from the bottom of the hollowed knot. Gradually, Zagreus slipped his hand beneath the strap and shifted so that it became disentangled and fell neatly into his hand. The bag itself made no sound, but the sudden removal of force caused Nico's bag to come crashing down into the bottom of the hollow.

The sudden sound in the quiet stillness sent a flurry of action through the creatures. Nico cursed and drew his sword with a rattle as the iron scritched against its scabbard. The bat creatures screeched and took to the air, diving toward Nico with outstretched claws. The demigod brought his blade up and down in one swift arc. One of the creatures gave a shriek of agony and fell to the ground, a wing severed. In another quick movement, Nico relieved the thing of its head. Its body crumbled to ash and seeped into the ground.

Zagreus grabbed at Nico and drew him away from the tree as the remaining creatures wheeled upward in the sky. "Leave them!"

"But the bags-" The creatures dove again. Zagreus threw a hand up, shadows racing toward the pair until it formed a solid wall to one side of them. Several of the creatures turned away, shrill whistles escaping their mouths as they vaulted toward the sky once more. The couple who swerved around the wall were met by the iron of Nico's sword, but, this time, the iron failed to connect with a single creature.

"We'll have to come back for them. Come on!" Zagreus grabbed Nico's hand and tugged him forward until the demigod stopped resisting. Nico allowed himself to be pulled along, using Zagreus' hold on his hand to keep himself from slipping in the dense undergrowth between the poplar trees. He kept his right hand wrapped around the hilt of his Stygian iron sword, stabbing upward and behind any time he felt a whoosh of air or heard a wing beat behind him.

Sooner rather than later, like it had been with the rodents, the pair realized they would have to stop and make a stand.

"We have-" Nico tried to speak between gasped mouthfuls of air. "-to stop. To fight. We can't-keep running!"

Zagreus nodded, not bothering to speak. Instead, he pointed ahead to a shallow cave opening.

Nico heard the rush of wings less than a second before he felt claws dig into his back and shoulder. Grimacing at the sudden onset of pain, he thrust his arm over his head and backward. The blade sunk deep into flesh and a piercing shriek filled the air. The claws in his shoulder spasmed, digging deeper into his skin before letting go altogether.

Nico gritted his teeth together as he felt blood trickle down between his shoulders blades. Reacting to the injury, however, was not an option. He heard Zagreus grunt beside him and looked over, pain rippling through his back as he did so. Another of the bats had latched onto Zagreus and was trying to go airborne with him.

Without breaking his stride, Nico switched his sword to his other hand and struck out at the creature, spasms of pain making his swing wild and clumsy. Zagreus continued to push forward, reaching up with his opposite and free hand to try to pry at the claws clutching the sinew between his shoulder and neck. The bat beat its wings savagely as Nico pulled his sword back to hack at the creature once again. This time his blade bit deeply into the thing's wing, and it flopped to the ground, hissing and trying to drag itself after them. Nico did not give it a mercy blow- there was no time.

The two made it to the opening of the shallow cave.

Zagreus turned abruptly on his heel and threw his hands up, shadows creating a solid black barrier. Several thuds sounded against it as the bats threw themselves at the wall, trying to get to their escaped prey.

Nico sank to his knees, hands thrust out to the floor to steady himself. His breath came hard, and he reached up and pressed down onto his shoulder, trying to put enough pressure on his wound to stop the bleeding. But, it was too far back for him to reach, and the blood kept trickling down his back in what felt like several small rivulets.

Zagreus leaned over and placed his hands on his knees, gasping for air.

Nico glanced at him, and his words came out more sharply than he intended. "What were those things?"

Zagreus shook his head, still unable to speak. His own golden ichor-pale and green tinged like his mother's- trickled from the gash in the muscle between his shoulder and neck.

Nico furrowed his brow in disbelief. "You live here. Shouldn't you know what those are?"

Zagreus lost the battle to remain standing. Once seated on the floor of the cave, he looked over to Nico wearily. "I have never seen those things before in my life. And I've been around a while. So they're not from here. In fact," Zagreus took another deep and shuddering breath. "I wasn't familiar with the thing before the bats either. Or most of the things we've seen over the last two days."

Nico shivered, and Zagreus finally seemed to take heed of the state of his half-brother.

Groaning, he dragged himself to his knees and crawled over to Nico. He reached toward the demigod, who frowned and pulled out of his reach.

"Don't be ridiculous." Zagreus snapped. His free hand darted out and held Nico's shoulder, refusing to let him pull away again. With his other hand, the son of Persephone pulled Nico's jacket and shirt away from his body to assess the damage. He peered down the cloth before hissing in sympathy and letting the fabric fall softly back into place. "You're losing a lot of blood."

Nico's teeth chattered. "No shit."

Zagreus grinned lightly, despite their dilemma. "Such language, little brother. Now, where did you pick up an attitude like that? I thought kids were supposed to be polite back in your day."

Nico glared. "Believe it or not, curse words were a thing when I was born. Idiot."

Zagreus tsked before removing one of his fur pelts and a leather strap from one of his greaves. He moved toward Nico, who looked at him with suspicion.

"What are you doing with that?" Nico tried to shy away from Zagreus's hands but was unable to do much with so little energy. The god helped Nico shrug out of his jacket before slipping the pelt between Nico's shirt and skin. He pressed down and looped the leather strap under and around Nico's chest and armpit. Once he was done, the trickling of blood ebbed: the pelt was slowing down the loss of blood.

Zagreus sat back, looking satisfied. "There. That should hold until I get back with the packs and can properly take care of it."

The demigod stared at Zagreus before shaking his head. "I'm sorry. I could have sworn you said 'until you get back with the packs, ' which would mean you'd be leaving to get the packs."

The god raised an eyebrow. "That's exactly what I said and exactly what I meant. Your back isn't going to heal on its own." Zagreus frowned. "Well, it will but not in a timely enough manner."

"But," Nico spluttered. "You can't go out there. Not alone. Those things might come back. And who knows what else is out there."

Zagreus opened his mouth to respond, but Nico continued, ignoring the god's attempts to rebuttal. "Besides. You're hurt too. And, what happens if you get hurt worse out there? You won't have me to help. And, you won't be of any help to me if you wind up getting your immortal ass in a bind."

Zagreus cocked his head to one side and sighed. "You do have a point, I suppose."

"You suppose?" Nico scoffed. "If that's your way of saying that I'm right, then yeah. Suppose away."

"Then what shall we do in the meantime? Let you bleed out? How will I explain that to father?"

It was Nico's turn to fall silent. The pair sat in the still quiet of the cave, neither able to come up with an acceptable solution.

Nico sighed. "Maybe...maybe my back will clot. If it stops bleeding, then we can leave together. We stand a better chance of getting our packs back with minimal damage to ourselves if we work together."

Zagreus nodded. "Of course, we will need a plan of action. Possibly a contingency plan."

"Yeah."

The son of Persephone clapped his hands together. "Alright. First thing's first. You," Zagreus pointed at Nico. "Get some rest."

Opening his mouth to protest, Nico felt his face flush as Zagreus held up a hand to halt his tirade. "I mean it. I can keep going for a while if need be. I've had worse thrown at me."

"So have I!" Nico contested hotly.

"I know you have, brother." Zagreus was already fortifying the wall of shadow, prodding patches as if to test its strength and resilience. "But, there's no need to push yourself when there are other options available. You don't always have to prove yourself, you know. You're plenty worthy as is."

Nico fell silent once again at Zagreus' words, feeling his cheeks warm at the small compliment.

"So, I say that we rest. For a few hours, anyway. Once we've recouped some of our energy, we can leave here and head back to the tree. Once we retrieve our bags, it might be best to head back here."

Nico scowled. "And if we can't make it back here? Or if this place has become compromised?"

"In that case," Zagreus started. "In that case, we just find something else and make it work. It's easier to find a cave like this one." He gestured to the cavern walls around them. "Creating a barrier as opposed to a structure is much easier to manage as well as maintain. I should be able to keep this up for hours if need be and not be a wreck."

"Some help I am," Nico grumbled. "Doing that on this type of level? I probably would've turned into a shadow myself by now."

Zagreus stared at the demigod in confusion. "Why is that a bad thing?"

"Why is turning into a shadow a bad thing? You really are out of touch with mortals, aren't you?"

Zagreus shook his head. "That's not- I meant, it's not a bad thing that you can't do this. Hadn't you ever thought about that?"

Nico looked up at Persephone's son, puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"Well," Zagreus began. "I can only do this because I've had centuries of practice. Because I am a god. I'm immortal. But you?" Zagreus smiled softly. "I would think that it is somewhat bittersweet to be reminded of your limitations as a mortal. Isn't that, after all, what separates you from us gods? The fact that you do fade? That you have limitations and die? It keeps you from taking all of this for granted. Gives you a different perspective on life and what matters."

Nico thought for a moment and then shrugged. "But not having those powers...what good is having that perspective if it means that everyone you care about dies? Because you weren't strong enough to save them?"

"That," Zagreus said softly. "Must be a terrible thing to have to think about day in and day out. But," Zagreus looked at Nico. "Did you ever think about our limitations? As gods, we are not allowed to interfere in the lives of mortals- at least, not the ones we care about. So, answer me this, Nico. What good is having powers if you can't use them to save those you love? Ask father about Menthe. Or even about your mother. It was she, after all, that led him to curse the Oracle. Wasn't it? Because of what he couldn't do to save or avenge her."

Nico nodded with a slight jerk of his head. When he spoke, his voice was small and strained. "Yeah. It was."

Zagreus shrugged. "I'm not trying to play a game with you. It just seems like...there's a saying mortals use that I quite like. What is it? The meadows of green on the other side are lovely? Something like that?"

Nico gave the other son of Hades a lopsided smile. "The grass is always greener on the other side? That saying?"

Zagreus grinned. "Precisely! Maybe some of us gods are starting to look at mortals and realize what a valuable asset they really are. Don't count all of us out, alright?"

Nico shrugged but then nodded quickly. "Okay, Zag."

Zagreus beamed at the use of his shortened name. "Well, we should settle down to rest then."

Nico grabbed his jacket and bunched it beneath his head. He lay on his left side, trying his best to alleviate and not exacerbate the pain from his wound. Half an hour passed before Nico finally succumbed to sleep.

The Waystation was quiet- unnaturally so. Dusky sunlight filtered through the magnificent stained glass windows, and not a single inhabitant made their presence known.

Faintly, as if coming down the hall and through a locked door, Nico heard his name being called. The voice sounded desperate and weary. Wracked with pain.

"Nico! Friend! Please help us!"

The son of Hades immediately began to run in the direction of the voice. Was it coming from the elephant enclosure? Nico made his way down the hallway, ignoring the closed doors on either side of him. He was barely ten paces from the large chamber when the voice called again-back the way he came. Nico stumbled to a halt and turned, ready to run back, his heart in his throat.

He froze.

Before him, each of the doors lining the hallway was open. Cautiously, he walked forward. He grasped for the Stygian Iron sword at his side. But it was nowhere to be found. Nico reached the first door and glanced in.

Stan and Deacon stood in the room side by side, facing the doorway. Their eyes were wide open but sightless. Each boy was pale and had a chalky pallor- as if their skin were ready to be sloughed off. Dark purple energy shone from beneath their papery flesh.

Nico backed away, quickly scanning the other rooms.

Each held a different member of the Waystation. Olujime and Sssssarah. Lit. Cal. Emmie, Jo, and Georgie. The last room held- not Leo as Nico had expected but- Britomartis.

Like the others, purple energy crackled like fire beneath her skin. Her eyes shone with a baleful umber. For the first time Nico could remember in these dreams, she looked directly back at him when he looked at the goddess. She saw him.

The goddess of nets grinned, and purple electricity hissed and snapped in her mouth like miniature lightning. Her voice, when she spoke, was brittle and hoarse- not at all normal. Gone was the sultry, seductive tone. Gone was the mockery and imperious attitude.

"Another battle, ceaseless war..."

Nico felt the blood drain from his face as the familiar words washed over him.

"Like all the countless ones before:"

He slapped his hands over his ears, but it didn't stop. Instead, the words seemed to ring in his head.

"Two find an end, what'er shall be

And fall to abyss, one time and three."

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no." Nico tried to drown out the prophecy as it poured out from Britomartis. "Stop it. Please!"

What he would give to hear Bob calling his name once more. To be rid of the words that had hung over his head for half a year.

"First long gone in days since passed,

Second, for knowledge whole and vast.

The final and the first in one:

The ending of the world begun."

Nico scrambled backward as the prophecy spilled from her lips. Words continued to issue forth, and her skin seemed to catch fire with the purple energy. Umber flames danced behind her eyes. He turned to run- to flee and leave the room. But, as soon as he had spun around, he threw himself back toward the goddess. The pale and still statuesque figures of the Waystation inhabitants gathered all in the room.

The son of Hades fell to the floor and felt pain flare through his back. The others- Emmie and Jo, Lit and Cal- all stared back at the goddess of nets who continued speaking, her voice bombarding Nico with the last lines of the prophecy.

"Look into a depth unknown

All hope is lost if seen alone.

Unless a sacrifice is made-

By fire, madness, or by shade:

Endless peace draws near at last

That death-that rest- won't be surpassed."

Silence fell, and Nico felt his breath come in great shuddering gasps. The figures- so still before- crumbled before him, falling away into ash. Britomartis burned behind him until she, too, disintegrated and seeped through the floorboards of the room.

Nico wrapped his arms around his knees and buried his head in them.

He breathed in.

One, two, three, four.

He held his breath.

One, two, three, four.

He exhaled.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

He kept breathing, going round and round in his head, trying to block out the terrible thoughts and images that flashed in his mind.

The abyss. Memories raced through Nico's mind:

Curiosity and ego overcoming sensibility. A wind- too strong for him- until he was falling, falling, falling. Falling for what seemed like days. Through darkness. In darkness. Until he felt he was the darkness. But never a shadow to be seen. A searing heat- the bursting pustules that covered the back of the primordial god. And then? Nothing but a blank prison wall- gold walls, sloping and slanting. His days in a jar. Caught between somewhere living and dead as his fate hung by pomegranate seeds.

Nico didn't realize he had begun to count out loud instead of breathing until a soft voice spoke from right beside him.

"Shhh. Ghost Boy. It's alright."

Nico looked up and saw Leo crouched beside him. The boy smiled slightly, eyes tinged with sadness. "It'll be alright. Didn't I tell you?"

Nico shook his head in confusion. "Leo? Tell me what? What are you-"

Leo leaned forward until his forehead rested gently against Nico's. The son of Hephaestus closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. When again he opened them, his eyes burned with purple fire.

"You fall, I fall."

Nico wrenched his eyes open and knew immediately that something was very wrong. His whole body ached and sweat-drenched his shirt, which now clung to him as if he had gone swimming while clothed. A hand brushed over his forehead and tucked a strand of hair behind his head. He leaned into the touch, barely able to open his eyes.

"Shhh. It's alright."

He looked about, trying to place the voice. "Leo?"

"No, Nico. It's Zagreus."

"Zagreus? Why are you at the Waystation? Is something wrong?"

"Eh...yes? I think the bat thing must have been venomous or something."

Nico tried to open his eyes. Zagreus' face swam above him with what looked like a worried expression. Stoney walls loomed behind the god. "This...isn't the Waystation." Nico groaned and closed his eyes again. "Why do I hurt so bad?"

"You don't remember?"

Nico licked his lips with a tongue that felt too hot and too heavy. "I don't...I can't think."

"Try, Nico. I need you to try."

Breathing shallowly, Nico cast his thoughts about, trying to find anything that would help him make sense of his current situation. He had been trick-or-treating with Leo. They had flown back home. Then, he and Leo...

"I was with Leo. At the Waystation. And then you came."

"Yeah. That's good. Keep going," Zagreus encouraged.

"We had to leave. To find...something. For father."

Nico felt Zagreus wedge an arm beneath his shoulders. Gasping in pain, he allowed himself to be pulled into a sitting position and settled against the cave wall. "Go on."

Opening his eyes, he tried to focus on Zagreus' face, his stomach lurching as he did so. He felt so tired. "Ah...we...we went to a hotel? And you were wearing a really, really stupid tunic."

"It's not stupid."

"My memory says different." Nico leaned his head back against the cold stone as a wave of nausea rolled over him. He breathed through his mouth for a moment before continuing. "I...you taught me how to send messages. Through shadow. Then, we went to DOA. With Meg. Or, Meg was there, at least? And she took us...she took us somewhere?"

"That's good, Nico. You're doing real good."

Nico shook his head, pain lancing through his skull. It was too hot in the cave. He pulled at the neck of his shirt. "I don't...I don't remember anymore, Zag."

"We met my mother briefly. Then, we spent a while walking along the Styx. The trail we were following turned away from the river. It's been a couple days since we left the water."

Nico's eyes narrowed. "So they- whoever we were following-"

"Hypnos."

"Hypnos. Right. Turning away from the river like that...was he attacked?"

"That," Zagreus tapped the side of his temple. "Is our working theory. And, it seems likely since we, ourselves, were attacked not much long after."

"By a giant...centipede thing? And then...lots of other monsters. And then, rats...right? At least, I think those were rats? Like, a big rat blob or something."

Zagreus nodded in agreement. "They're not from here. I have not seen them or even heard of them before."

Nico shivered, sharp pain increasing in his back as his muscles tensed. "It-the things seemed familiar. When I was in Westover, there was a boy. In my dorm. He told me some of the stories that his parents had told him when he was a kid in Germany. About the 'Rat King.' It was a creature- a monster- that had grown together. Hundreds of mice caught up in one until they actually became one giant rat made of flesh and bone and blood, and ice and dirt and their own excrement."

Zagreus pulled a face. "That's rather disgusting."

Nico stuck his tongue out at his older half-brother. "So are a lot of myths. My point is, that thing looked a lot like what Ansel described."

Zagreus sat back on his heels, still holding one hand out to steady Nico and keep him from falling sideways. "Alright. But what are they doing here?"

Shrugging, Nico wrapped his arms about himself, trying to stop shivering. Zagreus frowned before removing another larger pelt from around his shoulders. He pulled it free and draped it over Nico despite the demigod's protests. "No arguments. You're not going to get any better or help anyone if you freeze to death first. And father would not be pleased."

Nico ceased struggling and let himself settle into the warmth. It was more comfortable than slowly becoming an icicle. He looked up at the god and asked, "Why aren't you worse? If the bat thing was venomous?"

"I'm not mortal," he said simply. "Not to say I'm not feeling some of the effects. I should have healed by now but," Zagreus pulled aside his own tunic so that Nico could see the mottled yellow wound marring the area between his shoulder and neck. "I'm not. It's taking quite a bit longer than it normally would."

Zagreus let his clothing fall back into place and stood. He paced for several seconds from one end of the shallow cave to the next. Finally, he came to a halt and nodded. "Right. Well, you aren't going to get any better unless we do something. But you can't move right now. Not in a way that would be helpful. And, while I'm not fully recovered, I'm in a much better condition than you."

Nico opened his mouth to protest, but Zagreus continued speaking over him.

"Which means that plan A is a wash. We can't move you. Not right now. If we're attacked out there, you won't be able to defend yourself. And, since we don't know what's lurking anymore, we should do our utmost to be careful and cautious. It's what father would want."

Nico shut his mouth and glared at Zagreus. "So what, you're just going to go track down Hypnos and come back for me later? I thought father wanted us to do this together?"

Zagreus frowned at his younger half-sibling. "I'm not going after Hypnos just yet. I'm going for our bags. Knowing mother, she packed something that could help. Probably one of the teas," he mused.

Nico's face froze. "Oh," he muttered softly. "I just...I thought you would..."

"What? Leave you here to fend for yourself? While being ill?"

Nico shrugged, unable to meet Zagreus' gaze.

"I meant what I said before, Nico. About getting to know you. About wanting to...I don't know. Start acting like a brother."

When Nico looked up, anger and confusion clouded his expression. "But why?"

Zagreus hesitated before crossing over to the demigod and taking a seat next to him. "Jason."

Nico shook his head. "But that doesn't make sense. Why would Jason make you want to start acting like a brother to me?"

"Because Nico. You...you cared very deeply for him. And Bianca. And Will. Reyna. And now...Leo." Zagreus cleared his throat before continuing. "I...my mother and our father care for me. As does Thanatos, I'm sure. But," Zagreus trailed off and looked away into the shadows that blocked the outside from the cavern. "I do believe that is the extent of it. And, I believe, that is also the extent of those I care for as well."

His eyes flicked over to Nico's. "And I would very much like to change that. To be someone that others would...would care about if I were to no longer exist. To be that type of person who would be worthy of that reaction. And you, Nico, seem to be one of the only demigods willing to go out on a limb and take a chance with gods, mortals, and monsters alike."

The tension left Nico's shoulders, and he slumped more gently back against the cavern wall. "Oh."

Zagreus stood and smiled brightly. "So, I will bring back the packs and...well, we'll see if what my mother put together will be of any use to us."

He crossed to the shadow wall and seemed to steel himself.

"Wait!" Nico called out, one hand raised as if to pull Zagreus back.

Zagreus glanced over his shoulder at Nico, one eyebrow raised.

"Just...just be careful, okay?"

Zagreus smiled and nodded.

Nico continued, "I swear to all the gods if I have to save your sorry ass in this state...I said it before, and I'll say it again: there won't be a scrap of soul left for father to find."

Zagreus smirked broadly and mockingly saluted. "Be back soon, little brother."

Nico drifted in and out of light sleep. Each time he woke, there was no telling how much time had passed: the dusky light filtered into the cave through the wall of shadows, gray and cold. He didn't feel like he was getting any worse, but the dull ache in his back and the weariness throughout his bones spoke to how he was still affected.

Eventually, when Nico could not settle into a restful sleep, he pushed himself unsteadily to a sitting position. He sighed and looked around the cave for something with which to occupy his time. There was nothing. He shifted his weight and felt something poke sharply into his thigh. Nico frowned and reached into his pocket, withdrawing a pen and folded piece of paper that he had put there before the rodent attack.

He shifted his head from side to side, considering the paper in front of him. Zagreus would be upset if he wound up killing himself trying to send Leo a note. And, there was a better chance of him hurting himself worse if he tried to open a tunnel in his present condition.

But, the willfully rebellious side of Nico won out.

If I feel like I'm knocking on the doors of death, I'll stop. Simple as that. And now that I know I don't have to hold it open for so long, it should be fine. I should be fine.

Nico unfolded the paper and uncapped the pen. He settled the paper against his hand and gently started to write, trying his hardest not to poke through the paper.

Leo,

Nico paused, unsure of what to write next. Should he tell Leo he missed him? Tell him about what was happening on his adventures?

No. Neither. Zagreus said it was two days since they had arrived in the Underworld. Which meant that Leo, at least, had had another day with the kids at Dayspring.

Hope you're not still filling the kids' heads with lies about how you're better than me.

Nico's thoughts drifted to the group at Dayspring, and he smiled gently.

Tell Celia and Miles (and everyone else) I miss them.

Nico came to a halt. Wouldn't Leo wonder why they couldn't just use Iris messaging? It was a much easier way to stay in contact. And would allow for communication between them both. Not just Nico.

The son of Hades frowned and stared up at the shadow wall. Zagreus had said that both he and Melinoe used the shadows to communicate. Which was easy for them. They were both children of Hades and, therefore, could use shadows both ways. Leo couldn't manipulate the shadows himself, though.

But...what if Leo could use the shadows that I control? To send a message back? Zagreus did say it was like a tunnel. So maybe, if I hold it open long enough...maybe he can send something back through?

Nico chewed on his lower lip before deciding.

Can't use Iris messages anymore. Think I might have a solution, though. Try to be at this spot at 9:00 tomorrow night. And make sure you have a pen.

Nico half-smiled down at the note in his hand. He held his hand above the paper, wanting to tell Leo that he missed him. Instead, he shook his head and sighed.

Give Festus some tabasco from me.

Nico

The son of Hades scanned the letter before deciding that he had written enough. His eyelids were starting to fight to stay awake, and his body felt heavy. He needed to sleep again.

Nico folded the paper again and tossed the pen down to the floor by his leg. He crossed his legs and took a deep breath before closing his eyes. He thought of the shadow in Leo's room- the one cast by the son of Hephaestus' bunk bed. Settling on the shadow-like before, he focused on extending the shadow created by his crossed legs, as Zagreus had told him earlier.

He reached out and felt the shadow and became aware of its dark presence looming in his mind, whispering...whispering.

Come with us. Join us. Be us.

The tittering whispers came as no surprise to Nico. He swallowed and forced a memory of himself and Leo to the forefront of his mind. They were riding to the grocery store on the back of Festus. The wind was whipping tendrils of his hair that had escaped the tie. His hands felt warm wrapped against Leo's waist.

The cloying whispers subsided. Nico smirked, pleased with the success of pushing the insidious nature of the shadows to the side.

More memories clamored for attention, and Nico turned to them, letting them wash over him.

Leo raked his fingers through Nico's hair until it became manageable and then, expertly, wound a tie around the strands of hair. "What do you think?"

Leo standing at the top of the stairs near their rooms. "You coming, Ghost Boy?"

Leo lying on the deck of the fighting top, looking up into the night sky and seeing the stars. "They sure are beautiful, aren't they?"

The tunnel snapped into place much like before. Shaking with exertion, Nico tossed the paper into the shadows. The paper had barely left his fingers when he felt the tunnel begin to collapse.

No!

Nico slammed his eyes shut and forced the tunnel to stay open for several seconds more. Then, feeling as though he were about to pass out, he let the tunnel go. He felt the connection slam shut. He only hoped that his letter made it through. Zagreus had said it was instant...but that was with a reliable tunnel.

His head felt heavy- as if it was stuffed full of cotton. He carefully laid back down and pulled the pelt up and over his torso with his good arm. He settled his head once more on his jacket and drifted to sleep.

"You idiot! What did you do?!"

Nico tried to open his eyes but couldn't. He could barely breathe. Was he breathing? He tried to move a hand- to lift a finger even- to his chest. But he couldn't even do that.

"I go out there risking life and limb, and you- are you trying to kill yourself?!"

Zagreus. The voice belonged to Zagreus. Nico once again tried to open his eyes but still failed. Panic began to set in, and anxiety gripped his bones, gnawing at his stomach. He heard items shuffled around and realized that Zagreus was digging through one of the packs he had set out to bring back.

"Cinnamon, ginger. That should do for warming." More sounds. "Basil and...oregano. But where's the- ah. Thank you, mother. Thyme and rosemary. Perfect- that covers the grounding."

He heard water sloshing and wondered what Zagreus could be doing.

"What am I forgetting?" Zagreus sounded frustrated as he talked to himself. "There's something missing...something more. But, what? What else does mother normally use?"

A muffled curse and then a great clatter as Zagreus, Nico imagined, upended the bag and let each item held within fall to the cavern floor.

"No, no, no...ah! Black pepper. For release."

Several moments later, Nico felt a cup pressed to his lips. Zagreus forced the mixture into Nico's mouth. It tasted horrible. Cold and bitter and spicy and earthy. Nico's eyes flew open, and he coughed, trying to shove Zagreus away from him but only managing to gently slap the arm that held the cup.

Zagreus scowled furiously down at him. "What were you thinking? I leave to get you something to help you get better, and you decide to get worse? What did you even do? Did something try to get in? Did the wall not hold?"

Shivers wracked Nico's body as he tried to answer. "W-wanted to s-send a me-message."

The god's eyes widened, and, voice gaining an incredulous air, asked, "You wanted to send a message. Are you kidding me? Who is so important that you had to-" Zagreus stopped and took stock of the situation before asking softly, "Leo?"

Nico did nothing but shake.

Zagreus looked up and away, wiping a hand over his face. "You can't-you just-you can't-" Zagreus growled in frustration. "You need to take care of yourself better, little brother." Then, face still furious but voice more gentle, he asked, "Do you need help drinking the rest of this?"

Nico nodded, too exhausted to argue. Zagreus moved the drink to his other hand and then helped Nico sit up, arm snaking behind the demigod's shoulders to keep him in place. The other hand brought the drink up to Nico's lips. He drank sparingly at first, taking tiny sips in between gasping breaths. But, eventually, as the cold drink took hold in his belly, he began to feel less dead and drained the cup.

Zagreus gently lowered him back down, and Nico blinked owlishly up at his father's other son. "I'm sorry. I didn't feel so bad when I was sending it. Just tired."

Zagreus frowned, kneeling down to return the scattered objects back to the pack. "Why couldn't you just wait?"

Fighting a yawn, Nico answered somewhat sullenly, "I didn't think. That's all."

Shaking his head, Zagreus picked up the rest of the items in silence. It was several minutes before he came to sit back beside Nico, who had finally stopped shivering. "Well, no more sending messages. Not for a while anyway."

Nico pushed the pelt down from around his shoulders, protesting weakly. "That's not fair! I have to!"

Raising an eyebrow, Zagreus asked, "Oh? And why is that? Why do you have to?"

Nico looked away, feeling a slight heat flooding his cheeks. "I...I told Leo to expect it. At 9:00 tomorrow night."

The son of Persephone frowned. "Why a specific time? You can just send a letter any old time- it doesn't need to-"

"I wanted him to send something back," Nico said softly. "I just...it would be nice. To hear back."

Zagreus stared at Nico for a moment. "Get something back?"

Looking up at him with tired eyes, Nico nodded. "It can be done, can't it? If I keep the tunnel open long enough? Shouldn't he be able to send something back through? I mean, you said it's a tunnel. Not a chute, right? It should be able to go in both directions?"

Zagreus shook his head. "I don't know, Nico. That's not- we haven't-

Nico pressed on, despite Zagreus' doubt. "It should work. You told me how Arke used to be...what...the messenger in the shadows? This could work. It's worth a shot, at least. I have to try."

Zagreus gaped at the demigod, his mouth working soundlessly up and down.

"Come on, Zag. I have to at least try."

The god glared down at Nico. "No."

Nico opened his mouth to protest, but Zagreus held up a hand, cutting him off. "No. You're not going to try. You don't have the energy to open a tunnel right now. Even tomorrow, I wouldn't bet on you holding it open long enough to get something back."

Nico stared dejectedly at the wall of shadow opposite the two. Finally, he nodded. "You're right."

Zagreus heaved a loud and annoyed sigh. "What time did you say you'd talk to Leo tomorrow?"

Nico stared suspiciously at Zagreus from where he lay. "9:00. At night. Why?"

The god leaned back against the cavern wall and crossed his arms, scowling. "You can't open a tunnel. But I can."

Nico stared at his older half-brother in shock. "Really? You'd do that for me?" His eyes narrowed. "What's the catch?"

Zagreus scoffed. "No catch." He sat forward, uncrossing his arms and raising a finger to Nico. "Actually. Yes. Yes, there is a catch."

Nico glared. "I knew it."

The son of Persephone poked a finger into Nico's uninjured shoulder. "You have to promise me that you won't send messages on your own anymore. At least not until you've been properly trained. And you've practiced. With me."

Nico sighed with disgust and rolled his eyes. "Seriously? You're gonna pull that on me?"

Zagreus shrugged and brought a hand up to study his nails. "Take it or leave it. That's my offer. I make the tunnel and hold it so you can send notes back and forth with your Lover Boy, and you stop flirting with death."

Nico glared and snapped at him, "He's not my 'Lover Boy.' He's just Leo."

Zagreus smirked and said airily, "Whatever you say, little brother."

"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it." ~Rumi