So this story is gonna be wild. Hold on tight lol. I've started out working through V&B's beginnings, then it will pick up pace in a newer direction that I didn't think of until I looked at a cool image on Pinterest of Bulma as...well I'm not gonna spoil everything before you even start reading! I've spent a lot of time fleshing this out so tell me how you feel about things in the comments and I'll try to respond within a day. Enjoy!
You all know I don't own these guys. Just borrowing DBZ for fun.
"Woman! What did you do with my boots?!"
Vegeta had marched himself down to Bulma's lab after discovering his boots weren't with his armor that afternoon.
Bulma poked her head out from underneath her latest project. She was servicing her hovercar, as it needed its monthly tune-up. His feet were inches from her face. Vegeta looked down on her with a menacing glare, veins visible at his temple. She scooted herself back under the hovercar, huffing as she went.
"They're under your feet, you idiot!"
"No! My other pair!"
She scoffed and tested a bolt with her wrench.
"You mean your dingy, practically destroyed pair?"
"Well-worn and ready for battle, I'm sure you meant, you rude broad. Where are they?" He began glancing around the lab for their possible whereabouts.
"Oh yeah? Rude broad, huh? Guess what- I threw them out."
He flinched and his anger rose again sharply.
"WHAT? You take them out right now, you dim, thick-skulled harpy!"
She was out from underneath the hover vehicle in an instant. "I will NOT tolerate insults, mister prince! You want them so bad, you get them out!" she yelled. Exasperated at his words, she scowled and crossed her arms indignantly. She was not dim. She was too smart to be considered dim. She wasn't going to take that shit lying down.
"Ach! I won't go digging in such filth. How dare you deny me my property by throwing it in a disgusting receptacle," he groused, practically gagging at the very suggestion.
This would have amused her if he hadn't just been yelling in her face. Tired of the argument, she turned away from him. As she was walking out of her lab, she couldn't see how he was arched and seething, grinding his teeth. As he tried to relax, he reminded himself she didn't know how to act around royalty and that harming her would surely bring a barrage of unfavorable repercussions from Kakarot. Whether he wanted to outright admit that as fact or not. Restrain yourself. She's not inclined to being subservient. You're going to have to work around that.
"Hn." He took a deep breath, let it out, and crossed his arms. "Don't throw them out again. Or I'll be sure that what I do to you can't be fixed by a simple wish. Make no mistake, you reckless defector, I am very much evil. Don't push me to want you gone woman, you are usually quite competent."
Oh wow," she scoffed, despite his obvious simmering anger. Crossing her arms against her large chest, she cocked her hip as she turned to him, "That was almost a compliment."
He sighed, the flames of their typical afternoon feud fading into smoldering embers. "Go get my boots for me. And clean them. I've been distracted long enough. I need to train," He stated simply.
She gave a long sigh.
"Fine. But you gotta keep those clean then," she gestured down to his current footwear. He grunted in response, and she took that as her chance to leave the conversation and walk into the compound. This was a good time as any to pause and take a well-needed break on the living room sofa.
Yamcha exited down the hallway to find his girlfriend on the couch, reading a book.
"What's with all of the commotion, babe?"
She gave him a pointed look.
"It's nothing out of the ordinary, I assure you. Just our lord and savior, Prince Vegeta, throwing a tantrum, right on schedule for the typical afternoon lineup." She flipped the next page in her novel as he came to sit down next to her.
"You put up with him too much, B. What's on the menu for dinner, if you don't mind me asking?"
She put down her book and pulled out her phone.
"Definitely pizza. Mom's not home and I'm tired. Vegeta usually wants meat but didn't specify how he wanted it," she smirked
"Meat-lover's delight," they both announced in unison. They laughed as Yamcha pulled her into his arms, turning on the TV.
After Bulma finished fishing out Vegeta's worn pair of boots, she instantly put them in the washer. Men can sure test my patience and the tolerance of my nose, she thought as she quickly walked from the laundry room to the front door to greet the pizza guy.
"What is this, woman?" Vegeta asked when dinner was placed on the table.
She poured her men glasses of the sodas they had requested before they all sat down. Bulma opened the box of pizza, put a slice on her plate, and then served them their slices in turn.
"I guess it's time to formally introduce you to a real Earth delicacy. It's called pizza-more specifically Meat Lover's Delight, and it comes in these convenient boxes."
Vegeta sniffed the slices on his plate. Bulma started him out with three of them. She knew for a fact he was going to need much more than that, but this at least gave him a chance to sample a portion.
"They smell edible."
She laughed. "That's because they are. Sorry, it's not some fancy salmon or caviar, your highness."
He bit into his first slice. "I don't know what either of those things are. If they're Earth delicacies, I suppose the equivalent on Vegetasei would be vorslags, roasted alive over an open fire with faldera berries and a good, hearty vine fruit beverage."
"Well that sounds good, I guess…except for the savage, roasted alive bit," Bulma mused, casually chewing into her slice. "What else do your people eat?"
Vegeta stopped eating for a moment and glanced up at her from his fourth slice. Her wanting to know more was mildly interesting, but not unlike what he'd come to expect from the scientist. He decided to keep his description brief.
"We had large food. Your food, from what I've seen, is tiny. Big fruits and vegetables, and our hunters caught large beasts, like norbecks and vorslags, much larger than your elk or buffalo. Enough to satisfy my people in one or two courses. In fact, our beasts are so large in comparison to yours, that it would take a small army of your weak race to bring one down," he finished with a self-satisfied smile.
"Well I'm sure I could bring them to heel with my technological capabilities, might even endanger a species or two if I wasn't careful," Bulma countered with confidence.
Again, Vegeta considered her for a moment, remembered the weapon advancements she loved to flaunt and, deciding that actually might be truthful, remained silent. It made no difference; the beasts were extinct. He wanted to finish his meal tonight and not argue for once. Earth food was proving to be rather good.
"Anyways," Yamcha broke the silence. "Tomorrow, I was thinking Panchy should cook ramen. Your mother makes a mean beef noodle bowl, B."
She looked to Yamcha and smiled. "You're right, babe. I'll ask mom when she comes home."
As they finished their meals, Bulma's phone rang at her hip. She pulled it out and saw it was Krillin calling, so she answered.
"Hey, Krillin, what's new?"
"Not much, other than we found another dragon ball in Parsley City! Some vendors were trading it and without your funding, we never would have been able to buy it."
"Hey, it's for a good cause. Getting the dragon balls back means more wishes. Has Goku decided on the next set of choices?"
Krillin paused, trying to think if Goku had even specified. "No, he actually hasn't told me yet."
"Well, nothing could be worse than Oolong's wish for women's underwear." She laughed as she looked at the men across from her who were giving her weird looks.
Krillin cringed. "That and my potential hoagie wish..."
Bulma laughed again and then cringed too.
"Let's hope Master Roshi never gets a chance to be taken seriously, otherwise I could be in trouble again!" Krillin laughed that time with her, and it was Yamcha's turn to wince.
"I'll deck him before he ever gets another peek, Bulma."
"I know, and I'd hold you to it, babe!" Bulma smiled at him.
"That old hermit knows no restraint. It's despicable." Vegeta grunted, crossing his arms. Even Vegeta, who hadn't been on Earth long, knew to steer clear of that pervy, weird turtle man.
"Well hey, I gotta go, bud. We're finishing dinner. Congrats on the latest success in finding dragon balls-remember to keep my radar clean! Bye Krillin, I'll talk to you soon!" Krillin gave his regards as Bulma pressed end on the call.
"Yeah, I wouldn't be caught dead showing Roshi anything of mine ever again," Bulma smirked.
"Implying that you have before?" Vegeta said with a judgmental sneer.
"Believe me, being at the Kame house for any amount of time was a real test on your womanhood. And yes, I spent a lot of time there, which meant Master Roshi used every opportunity he could to get a chance to hike my skirt up. That silly old bastard."
Yamcha chuckled. "'Kay well for your sake, I won't tell our guest about the time you lifted your shirt and-"
"That's enough walking down memory lane, Yamcha!" He was laughing now, full-on and at her expense.
"It was stupid, I was...too young and- just shut up Yamcha!" He was still laughing at her, and Vegeta was trying his best to ignore it and finish his pizza. Bulma's cheeks were redder than pomegranates at this point, and she began slapping him to get him to stop.
"Alright, if you don't stop laughing, I'll get my dad to cook-and no noodles either-then we'll see who can still walk upright you...you pig!" Yamcha's laughter died down into nervous chuckling after her threat.
"Come on Bulma, you and I both know you're too smart to..."accidently" show him your crotch again!" As soon as the words left his mouth, he immediately stood and fled the kitchen to make for his room upstairs.
"FUCK YOU YAMCHA!" Bulma roared as she took off after him.
Vegeta watched them both leave before going back to eating his pizza, content to once again enjoy a meal in peace and silence.
"Hmph. Idiots. Alone at last."
Naturally, he spoke too soon as Panchy suddenly appeared in her kitchen. She and Dr. Briefs had, at last, returned home from their date.
"Oh yum, honey! You guys called for pizza huh? Woah! That sure is a lot, such an impressive man, Vegeta!"
Damn woman, he thought as he ignored her. He stood and made his way from the room, knowing the one place where he knew he was safe from interruption.
"So strong, look at those muscles! Wow, Vegeta, we sure feed you pretty well, huh?" Panchy chirped at her usual high-pitched shrill and, with that, Vegeta made his hasty exit with a loud thud of the patio door.