TOO SAD TO TELL
'Why? Why did they do this? Was it because of him? Or his shitty 'father'? They should know that you can't control your parents, but do they care? NO!' Rin stopped his inner monologue when his younger brother spoke to him. "Okumura-kun, listen to me when I am teaching! You want to be an Exorcist, but how can you listen to orders if you can't even listen to me!"
Time to bring out the damn mask. "Hehehe, sorry Yukio-sensei, but your lectures are really boring." "Now you listen here..." Rin blocked him out adding more to his inner monologue, 'Were they even my friends in the first place? And what about Yukio?' When Yukio saw that Rin wasn't paying attention, he just gave up and started on his lecture again. 'He kept his secret about being an Exorcist, so why not about how he feels about me too? Wait, that's not right...He blames me for Dad's death, and he's being cruel, he's being mean, and he's...right.' It took all of Rin's willpower not to burst out laughing. 'Well, would you look at that? The youngest Exorcist ever is once again right about a demon. I wonder, did Dad kill himself not just to get Satan out, but to be rid of me too?'
It was here when his monologue was stopped, yet again, when the bell rang, telling the Cram School students that classes were over. As soon as Yukio had dismissed them, Rin was out the door in a flash, but not before giving a 'cheerful' grin and wave to everybody. They ignored him, opting to talk with their friends instead. Normally this wouldn't have bothered Rin, but today it did. As he was walking to his dorm, that he shared with Yukio and Kuro (the cat familiar), he added more to his 'Monologue of Doom'. 'I doubt anyone cared for me. Hell, even the guy who makes up half my DNA doesn't care, he only wants to use me as a weapon... A weapon... That's what i am isn't it? A weapon to use to kill more demons. And as soon as I mess up...' Rin stopped walking. 'As soon as I mess up...Yukio will kill me.' After this realization, Rin continued walking.
'I'm already broken, aren't I?' He thought as he walked into his dorm room. 'Rin, what's wrong?' Kuro asked through their telepathy bond. "Nothing, Kuro," Rin said, his mask on once more. "Nothing's wrong, okay?" Kuro looked convinced, so he went back to his catnap. 'Kuro, I wish nothing was wrong. I really, truly, 100% wish that was true. But it's not.' Rin walked into the bathroom, grabbing his razor.
'After all,' Rin slid the blade across his arm, horizontally,"Humans are even more demonic than demons themselves.'
Another line. Another. Another, another, another, another, anotheranotheranotheranotheranother.
'And I'm the child of the two most demonic things to ever live,'
Another, this time deeper.
'I'm a demon and a human. The most demonic thing in the universe.'
Well, that was epic. If anyone ever reads this story, please comment! This is my first time at Angst!Rin and if anyone has any opinions or ideas, i will gladly take them! Ecila out!