A year had passed since Amy and I had to live with Frankie and the rest of the McBride family. Only a year old, Amy was already trying to make friends with everyone she could. I couldn't help but admire how valiantly Amy was living her life. She seemed to meet almost every situation with a smile, and she would squeal out every time Newt or Jewell showered her with affection. For the time being, I decided to tell her all about how awesome Namęšéme had been to us, how much he loved us, and how much he wanted us to have the best life possible. I wanted her to remember Namęšéme just as fondly as I was. I was determined to be there for her the same way Namęšéme had been there for me. It was what he would have wanted.

Almost as if in the blink of an eye, Frankie and I were already done with eighth grade. Now all that we had to look forward to was starting high school, which we were sure would change everything for us. I was especially looking forward to turning fourteen the same month we were to start ninth grade. Being thirteen was fine and all, but adolescence wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, especially for me. Facial hair was still a bitch to deal with, but at least I remembered when Namęšéme had taught me how to shave and how to be careful not to nick yourself. I also still had to tuck in my crotch whenever I could. Better that than having to hear the other kids call me slurs like the f-word or tell me they hoped I got AIDS, I guess. Not to mention, I never saw anybody that looked like me on TV, struggling to feel comfortable in their own body just like I was or with their own sexuality. I'd known I liked girls since before I started living as one, but I didn't know if I was the only one of me to exist in the world. It didn't matter anyway. Even if I was the only one out there, I knew there wouldn't be anybody else quite like me.

So I didn't imagine it would quite come to this one night on June 11th, 1987, the two-year anniversary of when Namęšéme had made the ultimate decision to move us from Malta, Montana to Vinita, Oklahoma. I'd spent most of that day reminiscing about when we'd first moved here two months after the decision. When Frankie had asked me what it had been like to uproot everything in Montana, I told her that the feeling had been bittersweet for me. It didn't matter if she already knew what my old life was like. I was willing to tell her everything all over again because it made her smile to hear it from my mouth. By the time we'd finished talking about the past, it was already dark out.

"So..." Frankie began.

"So... what?" I asked.

"Well, I always wanted to know what it would be like to lose my virginity to someone, especially someone like you."

I was somewhat shocked to hear her say that, especially when we'd been friends for almost two years. "I'm... I'm not sure what to say to that."

"I mean, we don't have to do it if you don't want to-"

"No, no! I totally want to do it! It's just that... aren't you worried your parents might catch us in the act?"

"Not if we do it all quiet-like, I'm not."

"Where could we even do it?"

Frankie smirked. "How about in the guest room?"

She was referring to what used to be Glen's room. He'd left for college last August shortly before Frankie and I had started eighth grade. From what I remember, he said he'd be attending college at Emporia State University in Emporia, Kansas. I was worried he'd get homesick at some point while he lived at the Towers Complex, but he assured us he'd be alright. As much as Frankie and I were looking forward to going to high school, we were also excitedly looking forward to going to college and all the shenanigans we could get up to while there. I'd seen enough "Animal House" to know what kind of adventures could be waiting for us there.

I gave Frankie's suggestion some thought before deciding on an answer.

"Well?" Frankie asked again.

"Sure," I answered with a smile. "I always wondered what it would be like to actually do it."

"Well, guess there's only one way to find out."

We both lay in the guest bed, the duvet covers concealing most of our bodies. I couldn't believe that we actually did it. I also couldn't believe how much our first time sucked. Wasn't your first time supposed to be awesome or something? Instead, it was just so painful and awkward and it only lasted under a minute at most. How the hell did the grown-ups make this look so easy?

"Well, wasn't that... something?" Frankie asked me with a nervous laugh.

"Tell me about it," I replied. "Nobody told me you could come before you were ready. I hope I didn't freak you out."

"No, it's okay. I guess our expectations for this were too high."

"How about we never speak of this again?"

"Okay." Frankie got out of bed and started heading for the closet. "There's gotta be some clothes in here that could cover us up."

"I hope it's got clothes in there that can fit us."

"I mean, who knows? Maybe they'll be too big on us."

"Okay, guess beggars can't be choosers."

I just laid there in bed, reflecting on all the memories I'd made with Namęšéme, the good and the bad and the in-between. There were moments where I wished he were still here to teach me about this stuff. I still had no idea what this world had to offer me, and some sagely advice would've been nice to hear any day of the week. Only time would tell if Frankie and I could get through this together.

A couple months after our first time, the day had come for Frankie and me to start ninth grade. It was supposed to have been a good day for us, but it didn't quite go as planned. That morning, I woke up to the sound of retching. What the hell? Was someone in this house sick? I cracked open my eyes and rose out of bed to see what was going on. I looked inside the bathroom I shared with Frankie, and I saw her bent over the toilet with her arm protecting her abdomen.

"Frankie?" I asked gingerly. "Are you okay?"

"No," came her weak reply. "Don't feel so good."

"What's wrong?"

"I... I don't know. I might be sick with something. Might be food poisoning."

"When did this start?"

"I think it started after we had our first time."

My eyes widened. Oh my God. I thought I knew what was going on right then, but I needed to be sure first.

"How long has it been since your last period?" I asked once more.

"Oh, I don't know. I think it was like two months ago..." She paused, seeming to realize the gravity of what she'd just said. "Oh God, it can't be..."

"I think you might be pregnant, Frankie."

Frankie still didn't move from her place at the toilet. "I can't believe it... we might be parents. What if I'm a bad mom, Jasper? I'm not ready for this! What are we going to do?"

I wasn't sure about it myself. As if being a parent while in middle school wasn't bad enough, being a parent to two kids while in high school was undoubtedly going to be a nightmare to deal with. I didn't want to be like Náhko'éehe, though. While she did give birth to me, she didn't really raise me the way Namęšéme had. She was more interested in being hedonistic and doing things most teenagers were expected to do back in the '70s. She basically neglected me, but I was determined not to do the same to our child... assuming we even were having a baby anyway.

"I don't know," I replied. "One thing is certain, though. No matter what happens, we'll get through this together..."

I hugged Frankie from behind, which made her sigh with relief. If she was really pregnant, then we'd have to find that out. I knew at some point that one of us would have to buy a pregnancy test.