Disclaimer: I do not own Ed, Edd n Eddy.
Prologue
By now, Double D is used to sitting between Ed and Eddy in the Principle's office, but he feels awkward and uncomfortable, talking alone with the guidance counselor he's never really spoken with. Mr. Richards has apparently developed a curiosity toward him, for Double D happens to have, not only the highest grade point average of anyone in the history of Peach Creek High, but also one of the longest lists of offenses on his permanent record. He could've been Valedictorian, and Mr. Richards wants to know why he gave it all up. "For your friends? That punk with the leather jacket?" Mr. Richards asks. "Or maybe your girlfriend? That dropout who dyes her hair blue." Halfway through sophomore year, the Kankers simultaneously stopped showing up to school. Marie was the only one passing her classes, but she was just as fed up with the bullying they'd all received from their peers. "Tell me about your nickname." Mr. Richards leans forward in his leather chair; fingers laced together. "What does it mean?" He seems to fancy himself a licensed therapist.
"Well, I suppose it's a sexual innuendo, but its purpose is to separate myself from my friend, Ed. People find 'Eddward' too formal, I suppose...?"
"Didn't you used to dress more formally?" Halfway through freshman year, Double D had outgrown wearing ties to school, finding it unnecessarily pretentious, and preferring to dress comfortably in baggy t-shirts and cargo shorts. "Why do you always wear that hat?"
"I have a dodgeball-related scar. I'd rather not talk about it." Double D self-consciously tucks a strand of shoulder-length, black hair behind his ear. "Anything else you'd like to ask, Sir?" He's growing weary of this conversation.
"What are your parents like?"
"Distant."
Mr. Richards actually jots the word into his notepad. "Now, tell me about this party incident."