Chapter 4 – Sophomore Outing
I had managed to cool myself down after all that had happened and woke up feeling calmer. I was still fuming at everything that happened, but I felt like my mind was clearer and I was able to think. Everything about last night came flooding back, the meeting with Vic, Leo, Johnny, and Capricorn. I looked over at the list I had made and picked up my phone.
"Hey Charles, any news from last night?" I asked.
"Well," he started, "Maya is jumping down my throat because of our early exit. Over It All couldn't do much without equipment, and even though we had never agreed to it, claimed we said they could use our stuff."
"Yeah, Matt said that he'll need to take him amp pedals to Guitar Center. Completely butchered in their soundcheck."
"Fuck. Well, despite that, apparently a lot of people had left by then, so no one even saw their set. Maya even said that the income from the show came more from your merch sales over anything that these guys did." I smiled at that.
"We do need to make more, especially for an online store." I flicked through the notifications on my desktop, seeing more people talking about Yin Yang, sharing videos from our show, and seeing a lot of people wanting us to come to their state or country. "We'll also need some studio time. If we want to keep up this momentum, we will need to get a single or something out there."
"Agreed. I'll look into it. Get your writing brain switched on, you'll need it for today." I giggled.
"I'll see what I can do." I ended the call and left my room. I found Max slicing fruit in the kitchen making breakfast. They turned to see me as I closed my door.
"Oh, hey there!" they said. "How you feeling?"
"Rested." I said as I took a seat at the breakfast bar. Max gathered their fruit salad and sat in front of me.
"So, spill." Max took a bite of melon. "How was everything with Vic?" I smiled at the mention of his name.
"He was great to hang out with. He actually gave me his number."
"Sick!" they took another bite from their breakfast. "You gonna meet up with him then?"
"Maybe…" I drifted into thought, thinking back to his sweet demeanour and how he helped our band. "I should at least do something to say thanks for coming to our gig."
"Yeah, please do! Don't think we would have attracted the following all of us have now without him."
"Yeah, no thanks to Over It All."
"Those twats are gonna get their comeuppance someday, just you watch."
"Oh, I'm watching, and waiting!" We both laughed at this. I got up to go to my room and got my phone. I found the number that Vic had sent and called it. To my relief, Vic's voice came through the speaker.
"This is Vic Lakota."
"Vic," I started, "It's Carrle. You alright?"
"Carrie!" I heard some fumbling in the background. "Hi, hey, you alright? Did you get back safely?"
"Yeah, all good, got back to the loft all fine. Bandmates were in, practically waiting for me." I stuck my tongue out at Max when I said that, so they crinkled their nose at me in response. "Ah, good, good, I'm glad to hear that."
"I was wondering if we could hang out, grab a coffee if that's all cool?"
"Um, yeah, yeah. That will be cool."
"Cool, see you soon."
Vic and I managed to find a spot at a local coffee spot. It took us quite a while because neither of us really wanted to go into a chain like Starbucks, and there's about a thousand per street in LA. Even so, we managed to find a small location that was off the beaten track. We sat on the table by the corner of the shop after ordering our drinks, mostly to stay out of the way in case Vic got noticed.
"So," he began, "how you feeling after performing last night?"
"Pretty good actually." I smiled, looking through the photos taken by the local photographers. Everyone in the band looked fantastic, but especially because of the editing. I followed all the photographers back on Instagram and made sure to tag them in my posts.
"It was a really good show you guys did last night."
"Aw, thanks Vic. It was just so strange with everything, you know. Over It All weren't exactly the nicest people to work with, but at least it's done."
"Yeah, we had our fair share of douche bands that we had to support in the early days."
"Yes, but you guys were already at a level where you can call out the asshats you tour with!" We laughed at that as our drinks arrived at our table. "But seriously, Vic, I'm so grateful for your help with packing the house."
"Hey, it's all good. I like helping small bands out."
"Yeah, because you were the one who said for The Mavens to perform at your festival!" He smiled.
"How did you know that?"
"I'm a huge fan of The Mavens." I admitted. "I swear, I must have played 'I Don't Believe In Love' a thousand times when it dropped on Spotify." I took a sip from my drink. Vic was still smiling at me; it was sweet to spend some time with him, though my thoughts returned to that encounter with Capricorn…what would they want in return to help with my band?
"Carrie?" Vic noticed that my mind had wondered. "Is everything alright?"
"Oh, yeah." I smiled at him, as if nothing was wrong. "Just still thinking about that encounter with Johnny." Vic rolled his eyes.
"Ugh, don't remind me about that. He's still in a mood about the whole thing, even when Leo demanded an apology to you about it."
"Leo seems like the voice of reason in the group."
"He's a good egg, though can be outspoken and hot-headed if not too careful."
"Guess the loss of Ricky must have hit him hard." Vic was silent for a moment.
"It was hard on all of us, but I don't think he's gotten over it, given how close he was to your cousin."
"What did you do to commemorate him? A funeral, cremation?"
"Cremation. Think Ricky still has his ashes actually." Ah, just like Capricorn said, I thought.
"I know it sounds morbid, but any chance we can swing by his place so I can pay my own respects?" Vic agreed, and downed his coffee. He coughed, as it was still hot for him, which I giggled at. As rude as Johnny was, becoming rivals with The Relentless as Capricorn suggested didn't feel right to me, especially as I was getting along with Vic so well. We got in his car and we sped off to Leo's place.
As we enjoyed the sounds of SirusXM Radio on our way to Leo's place, I really took in my environment I was now living in, seeing all the sights of LA and the beauty of the city. It was so cool, passing the studios like Paramount, driving in Hollywood, passing the Sunset Strip; it was all just unbelievable to see. Vic stopped at an interestingly designed house and parked the car. I got out and followed him to the door. He knocked on the door and waited for someone to open the door. Strangely, no one came.
"Maybe he's not in?" I suggested, not wanting to intrude on anything. Vic shook his head.
"No, he's usually in at this time. His car's here as well, so's his girlfriend's." Vic knocked again, a lot harder this time. We heard some fumbling around, then a blonde woman opened the door.
"Hi Vic, what's up?" She smiled as she tossed her hair. This woman, who I assumed was Leo's girlfriend, looked stunning. Certainly a lucky guy.
"Hi Jackie, is Leo in?" Jackie rolled her eyes.
"No, I guess you want to talk band stuff again." She remarked.
"Err, no not this time." Vic gestured at me to Jackie. "My friend here was Ricky's cousin and wondered if she could pay her respects to his ashes." She seemed to freeze up.
"Um, unfortunately not, it's probably not the best time right now."
"That's ok, can we come in anyway?" Jackie looked back in the house, then back at us.
"Sure, come in." She opened the door further and Vic and I went inside. The first thing I noticed was how purple the walls were. I took a seat on one of the sofas. "You guys want a drink of anything?"
"Just water for me, thanks." Jackie looked right at me after I said that.
"Oh my god, you're from England?!"
"Yeah, like Vic said, I was Ricky's cousin. We grew up in the same area so our accents were very similar."
"Aw, cute. I'll get you that water. How about you, Vic?"
"Err, same for me as well." He came and sat by me as Jackie left the room. He and I sat in silence as we looked around the room, unsure what to do.
"So," Vic said, breaking the silence. "you said you grew up with Ricky?"
"Kinda," I replied. "Same area, about 30 minutes' drive away. But we often shared a lot of experiences together; birthdays, holidays, even going to gigs together." I sat back as I thought about the shows I had gone with Ricky to. "There was a fantastic Bring Me The Horizon show we went to in Manchester around the release of Sempiternal. You should have seen him go into that pit for 'Can You Feel My Heart', that guy was a force, let me tell you!" I giggled thinking back at his energy whenever music was involved. "He wouldn't be a big fan of their new direction, wasn't that warm on That's The Spirit when it first came out. Yeah, definitely enjoyed the early deathcore stuff more." Vic smiled at my story.
"Weird to think then he would come and manage a rag tag team like us then!"
"Well that's the thing, he was telling me about Leo and Johnny and the music they were making when it first started. He was genuinely excited about it all, remember him saying that 'might not be my usual thing, but when I tell you they're gonna be big, I mean they're gonna be huge!', something like that. I know he would be so proud of you all with where you are now." Vic put his arm around me as tears started coming down my face as I thought back to Ricky and how much I missed him. Thinking back, it was bittersweet to remember those insane moment, but was also needed because he equally helped me with music as he did with The Relentless. "Sorry!" I said as I realised I was crying.
"No, no, you're good." Vic rubbed my shoulder. "That's really sweet to remember him by. I'm sure he'd be proud of you too with what you're doing, your show in the Viper Room, everything." I wiped my face.
"I go clean myself up." I said as I stood up and walked out of the room, looking for the toilet so that I could wipe my tears. I walked around the house, a little unsure of where to go until I opened a door. In there was Jackie and Leo with another man in what seemed to be some sort of ritual. My bittersweet tears turned into tears of anger as I saw Leo snorting powder from a jar. A jar marked 'In Memory of Ricky Rollins'.
At the sight of that scene, I turned my heels and bolted out of the house. I didn't even say anything to Vic as I just ran past him and out of the door. I could hear Leo and Jackie try and explain themselves, but I didn't want to hear it. I ran out of the drive and down the street, just wanting to get away from it all and what I had just seen. How could they desecrate him like that, my own cousin?! And here I thought Leo was a sensible person! It just filled me with so much anger, I couldn't think clearly about anything. I just knew that I had one thing on my list to do. And I wanted to do it as soon as possible. I called Charles and urgently requested studio time, as I had a song ready to record. He seemed unsure but went along with my request and made my way to The Village studio. He greeted me at the door and led me in.
"Now Carrie, I'm no producer, so I don't know what we would do-"
"I just need to put down a vocal track at least. Just get this out there and everything." I know I seemed forceful, but I just had to get my anger out, especially in music.
"Ok…well, I'll leave you with the engineer, he seems like a good person." The engineer walked in. Funnily enough, he looked very similar to the guy that was at the airport when I arrived in LA.
"Thanks." He said as I got myself ready behind the mic. "So, you going to bless us with some music?"
"I don't think bless is the right word here." I shook my hands as I tried to relieve the tension. I had thought of these lyrics as I walked my way to the studio. If I wanted to do what Capricorn had suggested and really take down Johnny, I had to hit somewhere where it would mean something. So what if I made a song about how he, someone without a father, would be a terrible father himself to any children he would hypothetically have?
"Alright, whenever you're ready." He clicked the switch and I heard the metronome clicks. I took a deep breath, and sung.
"All that I did was begin life, start off by wanting your hands
That's how it went
I had a smile on my face and I sat up straight
Oh, yeah, yeah
I wanted to know you, I wanted to show you
You don't know me, don't ignore me
You don't want me there, you just shut me out
You don't know me, don't ignore me
If you had your way, you'd just shut me up
Make me go away
No, I just don't understand why you won't talk to me
It hurts that I'm so unwanted for nothing
Don't talk words against me
I wanted to know you, I wanted to show you
You don't know me, don't ignore me
You don't want me there, you just shut me out
You don't know me, don't ignore me
If you had your way, you'd just shut me up
Make me go away
Make me go away
I tried to belong, it didn't seem wrong
My heart aches
It's been so long, I'll write this song
If that's what it takes
You don't know me, don't ignore me
You don't want me there, you just shut me out
You don't know me, don't ignore me
If you had your way, you'd just shut me up
Make me go away"
In that time, Charles must have contacted my other bandmates, as they had all arrived and watched me sing. When I had finished, I looked back to see the three of them staring at me. They entered the band room and set down their stuff.
"Err, Carrie, what was that?" Matt asked, very concerned.
"Sorry," I replied, tossing my hair as I tried to think. "I just had a very weird experience and needed to get it out."
"Wait, what happened?" Max looked worried. I had to think of something instead of the actual reason, knowing they wouldn't go along with this.
"I had a not nice interaction with Johnny Faust. He was just rude and insulting, and it really ruined my opinion of him." Max nodded, understanding my feelings. Matt looked a little miffed.
"You could have at least told us you wanted to go into the studio today." He waved me off and picked up his guitar. "Well, wanna teach us the song?" I smiled and taught the others the song and we managed to record it all that day. It was a bit harder than our usual sound, but with everyone understanding the tone and feeling I wanted, it was needed for this song. Max also produced and mixed down the tracks with the engineer, and we had it all saved onto their laptop.
"So, that's our first single?" Alyx said as Charles came back into the room.
"If that's ok with everyone." I said, assuredly. "I just feel it's important to get out there as our first track." I looked over at Charles, who looked up from his phone.
"Well, you can talk it over with Elias tomorrow if you want. He was impressed by the show at the Viper Room, he called to talk about signing with you guys." I smiled as the other members shared their excitement. It would certainly be a turn in events to be signed to the same label as The Relentless, but I thought, that would just increase the drama and the rivalry. Watch out Johnny Faust – we're coming for you.