4x16 (part II)

"No, we've lost him"

"Andy?" Maya called her, a few seconds later, making her friend come back from her daze. "Are you-?"

"Pregnant, yeah. I found out the day before your wedding." She finished. "He doesn't know, does he?" It wasn't a real question, as Bishop was fully aware that her former captain wouldn't have left her side if he had known. Even if Andy wasn't talking to him, she was sure he would've stayed for the baby. However, Herrera didn't say anything, which just confirmed Maya's theory.

"Andy…" The lieutenant prayed. "I know, I know. It just felt weird, with everything that was going on between us. What was I supposed to say? 'Hey honey, I'm so mad at you that I'm reconsidering our marriage, but guess what? You knocked me up before we fell apart.'" Herrera answered, with irony.

"You said you didn't want a divorce, why are you reconsidering your marriage then?" Bishop wondered, confused. "I reconsidered it, and I've decided I don't want to end it." The new captain reasoned, matter-of-factly. "Ok, you decided to give your marriage and your husband another chance, but you didn't tell him about it?" Maya carried on, trying to make her friend understand how messed up everything sounded. "I didn't have time to tell him anything. He left!"

"That's right, Andy. Your husband left. I love you, you are my tribe, but as your best friend I really need to say this to you, stop being stubborn, get your head out of your pregnant ass and just figure things out together. You might lose him forever if you keep pushing him away and I don't think you want that."

"Ok, tough love it is." The latina replied, with a weak smile. "Probably should've said all this earlier." Maya smiled back.

"Yeah, probably." Herrera agreed, sadly, before she continued. "I'm not blaming you, though. This is just on me."

"Hey, it's not over yet."

"Do you really think so?"

"Come on, Andy. That man adores you. He's been miserable, walking crestfallen around the station and constantly checking on you." Maya reassured her friend. "Really?"

The blonde couldn't hold a chuckle. "What are you? Blind?"

"I guess I've been too focused on my own misery to see his." Herrera realised, on the verge of tears.

"I know you love him too, by the way. You're just too hard-headed to forgive him for taking the job you wanted, but was unfairly offered to him. I've been there." Maya teased, and gave her friend a knowing smile.

"Wow, you woke up painfully honest this morning!" Andy joked back, but nodded, agreeing with her friend's words. "You got it, though. You are a captain now, and I'm sure he had something to do with this." Bishop tried to cheer her up. The mood changed suddenly, when she couldn't hold her tears anymore. "Hey, I didn't mean to-"

"I know, and everything you said was true. I'm sad because I…" She paused and sighed, trying to control her breathing and suppress the sobs. "I didn't want to make captain like this. I didn't want him to leave… I don't even know where to start, Maya. We have a lot to figure out and neither of us is good at talking. We both get angry easily and say things we regret later… I said things to Jack that- Oh my god! Do you think he knows?"

"Who knows what?"

"Robert! Do you think he knows what I said to Jack? Is that why he left?" Herrera worried, standing up. "I don't know, Andy. What did you say to Jack?" Maya asked, concerned. "I don't remember exactly but it was awful. I said something about not knowing the person I married." She related, gesturing and pacing around.

"Well, that's not too bad, you were having doubts-" Bishop couldn't finish, before a nervous Andy cut her again. "That's not the worst part, I told Jack that I had confused lust for love." Maya raised her eyebrows, surprised. "Did you really mean that?"

"No, I was pissed and stupid. I do love him, I've never loved anyone like I love him." Herrera said, desperately. "Then, why all the doubts, Andy? That doesn't sound like you're unsure about your marriage, I don't think you ever were… what else is there?" The lieutenant inquired, curiously.

"I don't know…"

Suddenly, the alarm sounded, and Maya couldn't get to the bottom of what had gone wrong between her friend and her boss, former boss, actually.