Hello everyone! How are you all doing?
The "review" from the anonymous user inspire me to write this long-ass one-shot. So thank you, and hope you gals (and guys of course) enjoy!
Also, this is the first chapter that involves a different point of view.
See you down below!
...
Eren did it, she thinks when she sees them entering the ruins of Paradis Island. Historia didn't believe he could, but he did it. The looks on his former friends' faces are all the evidence she needs.
We've won. But at what cost?
.
The remaining guards succeed in settling the Eldians down. Eren hides while the commotion takes place, while the queen gives a compelling speech about their newfound lives and freedom. She will handle the traitors later, but to not upset the crowd she offers her people options: those who want to, can leave, no punishment whatsoever. This is their new world, and after everything that has happened, she needs to handle things as diplomatically as possible to avoid another disaster. Historia needs to make it right.
She meets with Armin and the others in the castle. Here they are protected, and because of their service before the rumbling, Historia grants them forgiveness. And then, she offers Armin a position next to her, as her consultant. He starts laughing but she waits, patiently, knows that she at least has to try. Once he's calmed himself down, he looks at her and shakes his head. But Historia pushes. She doesn't try to justify Eren's actions, she just tells him this is his chance to make things right. There is an actual chance to do that here, by her side. Helping her and calling out her mistakes before it's too late. She gives him a day to think about it.
Armin interrupts her at breakfast, looks at her belly, and nods. With one condition: he and Mikasa will never see Eren again.
Historia accepts. And then, they start planning.
.
"You don't approve." Eren doesn't ask, and Historia gives him the same treatment, keeps looking through the window instead of at him. They are still cleaning what's left of the walls. It's been two weeks since year cero started. She signs.
"I'm overwhelmed." Historia declares. "I didn't think you would actually get to fulfill it."
Eren stays silent. She is still processing the news about Ymir, after all.
Not her Ymir. She is long gone. A memory of a simpler and sugar-coated time.
No, this is about her child, a reincarnated Eldian soul. All pointless. She glares at him. Eren's face is still cold, tired and so, so lonely.
"You didn't trust me?" he asks, out of curiosity. She can't tell if he's hurt or not.
"I thought they would stop you." Historia admits, with no remorse. It's the truth. A promise they made to each other not so long, even if it feels like an eternity has passed.
Eren gets up.
"I understand." he starts, unsure. Finally. "If you think I'm a monster..."
She shakes her head. No lying.
"It's not..." she clenches her fists. "One thing is what I tell them, Eren, but it's completely different from… from how I actually get to sleep at night knowing..."
He nods. It's not unexpected but, she sees it reflected in his face, it is still painful to hear.
She doesn't gloat. Nothing about this is fair. It never was.
"It doesn't mean I don't know what's best." She finishes, like the queen she is. "I just need time."
Eren nods, but he doesn't move. And Historia sees it then, the humanity that's left in him. So she gets close and hugs him. Eren lets her, incapable of moving away or hugging her back. He starts to sob.
"This is your punishment." She whispers, as if nature was communicating through her the truth of the universe to no other than himself. "She is punishing you."
And me, Historia doesn't say.
He doesn't really know if the word "why'" leaves his lips, but Historia doesn't let him go until she declares:
"For not killing us all."
.
Eren wonders about everyone all the time. He doesn't have anything to do anymore, so it's not like he can ignore them, all the unfinished business. Historia is still weary, and he is all alone.
That day, he lets his mind wander about Annie.
Her father is dead (he killed him). She is locked up (also his fault). Eren doesn't know why she hasn't killed herself yet, if not for some sick sense of self-preservation, or an expression of human nature, he presumes.
He's seen them all these past few months: Jean taking care of the fallen and traumatized, Levi resting in a wheelchair while doing the same thing, Historia ruling with extreme care, and Armin and Mikasa doing what they can to survive.
Survive him.
Eren hides away. A symbol, a myth, and a prisoner of his own accord. Historia visits him from time to time, updates him on the news this, his, new world has to offer. She doesn't ask for his advice, he was never good at politics anyway, but Armin is doing a great job. And so is Mikasa, in her own way, away from him.
He sees them holding hands once, and something dark, worse than jealousy, rises inside of him, and Eren has to stop himself before he does something else he will regret when he closes his eyes and tries to sleep at night.
Because the nightmares don't stop. He is human, after all. Despite all. So he visits the only person that he knows understands, some things at least.
He still hasn't figure her out. Never really had the time to. But he has it now.
And Annie doesn't have a say in the matter anyway. No one really did.
Eren sneaks to her underground cell. It's big, and she has changed a few things, which does surprise him. He did not expect her to be that kind of prisoner. There are a few books, weights, and some handmaid drawings glued to her wall.
"How did you get those?"
Is the first thing he asks, and even as she glares at him with a mix of ice and fire, Annie answers. "Falco drew them and gave them to me last time he visited."
She has her hair down, Eren notices then. He doesn't recall ever seeing her like that, and it creates a weird feeling in his gut, like he is overstepping even worse than he thought possible.
"Why are you here?" She cuts to the chase when he keeps quiet. She hates him, Eren knows. Everyone hates him. And everyone loves him. And both. And neither. There is just not in-between anymore.
And then he realizes why he is really there. She, of all the people he'd hurt, is the one that has to forgive him.
"I wanted to see you."
She is the only person that may actually do it. Eren holds onto that thought for dear life as Annie stays silent. She gets up, grabs a book, and starts reading. Ignoring him completely. He can't see the title from where he is standing, but he doesn't come any closer.
"Do you get many visitors?"
She still doesn't answer, and Eren knows why. Besides her obvious hatred and disgust, all the others… Armin, Mikasa, surely Reiner, Falco and Gabi, even Historia... Levi would have his reserves, but... that officer, the one that wanted him dead...
He knows they visited her.
So he leaves then. But even if he knows it shouldn't, seeing her does make him feel a bit better at night. After countless days, Eren feels like he has a purpose again, even if this one is a lot more selfish than the previous one.
At least until Historia gives birth, if she forgives him first and lets him come near his child.
But he won't push that. Not yet.
Eren sleeps, no dreams this time.
.
She still ignores him the second time, and the third. One time he almost bumps into the red-haired guard, but he manages to avoid her. No one can see him. He doesn't exist. He is dead.
.
The fourth time he wonders if she will get someone to stop him from coming. She could even tell Historia. And if she orders him to, he would have to stop. Shit, if Annie asks him he probably would too. He has to make it right. To try. To let her know he is sorry even if she would never feel that way for him, or any other person, besides her father.
.
He is curious.
Annie is doing push-ups when he comes in. He sits on the floor and says nothing this time. He never saw her train by herself, it was always the other way around, or her beating the crap out of him. Once she finishes, he asks:
"Have you asked for pardon?"
Annie must be tired because she answers like Eren wasn't the one that asked. "It doesn't matter. It's not like Ackerman would let me out anyway."
Eren frowns.
"Why would Mikasa...?"
Annie looks at him, at first like she couldn't believe the stupidity of the question, but as she remembers who asked it, she glares at him with resentment.
"Levi Ackerman." She explains, in a nonchalant manner. "I murdered his squad." And she waits for his reaction, his dread, his anger. "He hasn't forgotten about it."
Eren doesn't show her any of that. "Historia could make it happen." He says, partly because it's true and also because he wants her to keep talking. This is the most progress he's done in weeks.
Annie falls into the chair. "I have nothing to offer your girlfriend, Yeager. Not like Reiner. I'm not a weapon anymore, so these are all the favors I'm going to get from her." She pauses. "All that she can give me to avoid having the same fate as your brother."
Eren tenses up, and Annie smirks. He wasn't expecting her to have all that knowledge. Then again...
"And what do you want to do?"
She looks like she wants to laugh, the breath leaving her mouth so quickly it makes her choke. Once it's over, she goes back to normal Annie. "You're giving me a choice now?" And Eren knows he made a mistake but it had to happen sooner or later anyway. "Wish you could've shown the same courtesy to my father."
And it stings. For both of them. He can see it in her cold façade. Annie then turns around in what could be considered childish if it was performed by anyone other than her. Eren gets up and leaves her, but his heart doesn't stop hammering in his chest until he is in his own prison.
.
A few days later, he returns. There is a new drawing on the wall.
"I met him." Eren says, to break the always heavy silence. "When I was in Marley. We talked."
Annie is lying in bed, not looking at him.
"Save your story for someone who gives a shit, Yeager."
He tries a different approach.
"Do you want to talk?"
"I talk enough."
She doesn't say "not with you", but she doesn't need to. Eren looks at his hands, covered in blood, and whispers:
"You are never going to forgive me, are you?"
She sits in the bed, tenses up even more. Clenches and unclenches her fists.
"That's why you're here?" she shakes her head. "And when I actually thought you had grown out of that…" She gets up and walks to stand in front of him, as close to the glass as possible. "No Yeager, I'm never going to forgive you. You are insane, and pathetic."
He is surprised, by the choice of words, and by how close she is. He can't look at her.
"I did what I-"
"I don't care." She doesn't back down. "Your girlfriend tried to convince me many times, and I still don't want to hear it. If it was up to me I would follow your friends' example and never see your face again." She shakes her head, whispers with incredulity. "I mean, if even Ackerman could do it..."
"It's up to you."
She smiles, anger and betrayal and pure loneliness.
"Is it?"
He takes a step back, crosses his arms, and looks at the ground.
"I understand, Annie. And for what is worth… I-I am sorry." She glares. "But I'll stop coming here if that's what you want. Just know that I'm sorry."
Before he leaves he hears her crying.
"You could have saved my father, you piece of shit."
"I know." He doesn't apply the same courtesy to her, to the team she massacred and all the people she is in part responsible for killing. She doesn't hold a candle to him anyway. "I'm sorry."
And he leaves.
...
Hope you enjoyed! And thank you SSJYT for the suggestions! I will have them in mind for the next chapters. Also, after reading the leaked extra chapters, I leave you here a few comments on Youtube that made me laugh so hard:
"I used to think the AOT ending was a tragedy, now I realize it's a comedy."
"It's official: Attack on Titan / Shingeki no Kyojin is the greatest comedy manga and anime of all time."
-vigigraz