Hey, been a while since I've had one of these but wanted to jump in and say I'm sorry for not having an update on the fifteenth. Took a trip out to see my mom and family for a week and didn't have my laptop with me to upload or anything.
Anyways, with this one, it's a three parter so not to keep anyone hanging for the next update on the fifteenth I'll have part two up on Wednesday and then part three up on Friday for y'all.
To everyone whose come by, reviewed, faved, followed, thank you. Hope y'all are doing well, take care and till next time!
He wasn't exactly sure what time they'd ended up passing out in the night after their long, undisturbed, shower. All he knew was that he went to bed a very satisfied man with a smile on his face, the love of his life curled up beside him on his side with his arms draped over him and holding him close.
He hadn't had a Christmas like that in a long, long time. Didn't have the joy and love behind it, so every year he never really bothered unless he was at Ming's place with Thomas and celebrating, or at Tala's getting shit faced.
This one though, it was special and one he didn't want to ever forget.
Everything was good. Really, really good and he wanted to hold onto it for as long as he could. Though somewhere in the middle of the night he ended up rolling, releasing Ray from his hold as Ray rolled away from him. Yet the smiles they had when they returned to bed remained.
With a rib shaking cough, feeling like he was suddenly choking, Kai spluttered awake. Eyes stinging and watering quickly as they opened only for them to close again as his chest rattled and heaved.
He was used to coughing in his sleep at times, being a smoker and when the tar settled in his lungs, but this was different. The smoke felt heavier, settling in his chest and suffocating him.
He tried peeling his eyes open again as he coughed harder, the smoke sucking down into his throat where he could almost taste the fire itself on his tongue.
Coming out of such a heavy sleep, brain still slowly turning on, it wasn't until he heard the screams did it kick back on fully. Eyes snapping wide open despite the sting and body jolting off the bed where even his carpet was warmer than it should be under his bare feet.
He didn't know what was going on, how could he when he'd just woken up and was choking on what he thought was the tar in his lungs when in truth it was his room being filled with smoke?
He glanced at the bed, Ray's spot empty and his heart painfully stopped for a brief second until the screaming down the hall jolted him again. His door had been left wide open and he rushed through it to find Ray slamming his body into Thomas's door, the screams coming from the boy on the other side of it.
"KAI! Oh thank god you're awake! I-I can't open Thomas's door!" Ray practically screamed in desperation through his own chokes.
"It's okay Thomas! We're gonna get you out! Kai come on you need to help me!"
Though all Kai could do was stand there like his feet had become glued to the ever warming floor under him, watching Ray coughing on the smoke himself while ramming his body into Thomas's door again and again as it barely budged.
Thomas's screams on the other side only got louder, not even the fire alarms going off were as loud as the boy was.
He didn't understand... None of this made sense on why his house would suddenly be up in flames but it was and yet he just stood there as the smoke crushed his lungs and made his chest ten times heavier.
"KAIII! Don't just fucking stand there!" Ray continued to holler, tears streaming down his face as he continue to bray on Thomas's door.
"We need to get it open! Come on!" He continued to splutter and choke, his lashings on the door becoming weaker though with every cough.
"K-Kai... We need to... Save him..."
Having inhaled far too much of the poisonous fumes, Ray's body then fell limp, dropping like a rag doll to the floor unconscious leaving the screams on the other side of the door to grow even more hysterical.
Kai didn't even notice the silent and warm tears running down his face. First Ming, and now he was going to lose both Ray and Thomas?
If he just got his feet unstuck... If he had just done something else to save her then this wouldn't be happening right now. Right?
With Thomas's screams getting louder to the point they hurt his hearing, his head jerked up away from Ray's unconscious body on the floor by his feet in time to see the flames licking up the front of the bedroom door just before it burst wide open. The flames shot out, the heat so overwhelming that it seared and burned his skin instantly as Thomas's screams continued to ring in his ears.
With a shuddering and hard gasp, the horrible sounds still raging inside his head, Kai shot up in bed drenched in sweat and eyes wide and panic filled. Chest heaving and slightly shaking, he glanced at the space beside him only to find it empty.
Just like in his dream his heart slammed to a painful stop and even more so when he could faintly smell something burning.
Throwing the sheets off himself, his limbs threatening to give out on him and not even taking notice how cold his carpet actually was under his feet, he stumbled his way to his door where the smell was getting stronger and wafting up from downstairs.
Clutching the railing so he didn't fall down the stairs, he stumbled his way down, every step making him take in a harder and more shuddering breath as the sweat still clung to his pale skin.
"You burnt it Uncle Ray." Thomas's voice whined.
"I didn't mean too." Ray whined back at him from inside the kitchen, making the painful lump in Kai's throat loosen some as he edged his way around the corner to find the two of them perfectly fine by the counters.
The piece of bread in the toaster burnt beyond all repair, the smell of it horrible, but not as horrible as that dream had been.
"We'll just pop in another one, how's that sound?" Ray asked as he tossed the burnt piece away, finally catching Kai standing there staring at them all and taking notice of the sweat on his face and paleness that covered him.
"Hey... Hey, you okay?" He asked, forgoing making more burnt toast and went up to Kai carefully.
His heart was still racing, adrenaline coursing through him making him feel nauseous. Kai just mindlessly nodded to him, taking another glance to Thomas who was more than okay.
They were fine... Everyone was fine... It was just a dream...
"Yeah..." He then answered in a breath, eyes watering some before his shaky hands reached and gently pulled Ray into his arms to hold him close.
Ray didn't bother to ask again; it was clear something was wrong, but he wasn't go to pry and instead put his arms around Kai back to try and help him out of whatever funk he'd woken up in.
"Got some coffee made for you." He whispered to him, hands running up and down Kai's back gently.
Kai held onto him tighter, face burying into the crook of Ray's neck, the smell of burning in his nose being taken over by the sweet smell of whatever he'd used on his hair that morning.
He knew none of what he had dreamt was real. But it had still shaken him all the same.
"I love you Ray... So much..." He whispered, his thumping chest slowly calming now as the other's hands caressed his back in comfort.
"I love you too." Ray said, pulling back some to look at him and feeling horrible for him. He'd never seen him look like this aside from when they held Ming-Ming's funeral.
"Hey Thomas, be right back okay?" He said over to the little boy, taking Kai's hand and leading him to the office by the front door and shut the door so it was more private.
"What happened baby?" He asked, cupping Kai's face in his hands.
Crimson eyes had watered again as he looked to Ray though huffed a laugh before wiping them feeling foolish for being upset. Practically crying over a nightmare, what was he five?
"Nothing... Just..." He exhaled a sigh. "Had a bad dream that's all."
"Wanna talk about it?" Ray pressed, caressing his clammy and pale cheek in his hand.
Kai leaned into the touch, placing his hand on top of Ray's before lightly shaking his head. "No, it's fine... I'm gonna go take a shower." He announced, placing a kiss on Ray's forehead and stepping back out of the office.
"Oh... Okay... You want anything to eat?" Ray called after him as he followed, not sure what else to do but just get back into their morning.
"No I'm good." Kai answered already half way back up the stairs, feeling a little better now after a hug as childish as that sounded.
Ray watched him go until he couldn't see him anymore, heading back into the kitchen and shaking himself out of the weird funk Kai had put him in.
After last night he didn't think there was a way to have a bad dream, he surely didn't have any... Then again, that just begged the question to what it was Kai dreamed about to come down looking the way he did.
He normally wouldn't pry, especially after Kai brushed it off more than once, but what else was he supposed to do?
"Hey, sorry about that." He smiled at Thomas as he joined him back at the counter, Thomas having waited for him on the chair they brought up earlier.
"Let's try this again, huh? Without trying to burn the house down this time." Ray lightly laughed, dropping two more pieces of bread in the toaster and pushing the plunger down.
With clipboard in hand Tala was ticking off all the boxes of booze that had been delivered that morning at the club. Eyes looking up and down constantly referring back to the original order and then back to the alcoholic's paradise before him.
"Just shove it there with the others, I'll sort it out." He directed in a slight sigh to the delivery guy.
He was excited for the reopening of course, but his eyes had started to go funny studying this damn list. Was it coffee time yet?
With the final box set down, the guy left through the front metal door and in turn popped in long dark hair.
Tala turned to look over his shoulder at the impressed whistle that just rang in his ears.
"Oh hey shit head. It's a lot isn't it?" He commented pointing to the stash with his pen, "How many bottles of gin we need I don't know but seems to be all the rage right now."
"Well morning to you too." Ray chuckled back at him, helping Thomas out of his coat as they came through the doors, slinging it over his arm as the boy went off and ran about the empty place.
"Jesus, that is a lot..." He commented as he got up to where Tala was and eyed their new stock.
"What, no hello uncle Tal?" Tala called to the little hyperactive bundle of energy that had ran straight for the stage before waving him off to play.
"Pft. But yeah, think Kai went a little click happy with this order. Where is he anyways? Figured you'd show up together?"
Ray shot a look over his shoulder at Thomas just to check on him, blue hair hanging upside down as he was latched onto a pole in the center of the stage.
"He ran up to see Nicole, guess those divorce papers finally came through or something." He answered as he turned back to look at Tala.
"Said he'd be here when he was done, though who knows how long he's actually going to be gone for." He shrugged his shoulders some.
Tala accepted it, ticking something off on his list before heading over to a box and doing a count.
"Yeah, conveniently takes all day so he doesn't have to do this. I know his little tricks..." He muttered in jest though a question he'd had for a while resurfaced again with this information.
"I know it's prolly just 'cos he's a nice guy and all, but doesn't he think he's got enough on his plate to deal with without sorting her stuff out too? Like why is he always bending over backwards for Johnny's wife? Sure, they were business partners but what's the deal with her?"
Ray nodded a little for a second before he stopped and gave Tala a questioning look. "You don't know?" He asked, though by the look on Tala's face he already had his answer.
He'd just assumed, at some point, Kai finally came clean about his and Johnny's past to Tala. Though the more he thought about it, after the fight at the club, when did he have the time? Going from trying to keep whatever they had brewing between them from crumbling to Tala being in the hospital, then Ming's funeral and then Kai shutting them all out he could see why it wasn't brought up.
"Um... They're... Well... Him and Johnny are brothers. Step-brothers, but brother's none-the-less. So that makes Nicole his sister-in-law. So, guess he feels like he owes her something? I don't know, I never really pried about it. Though after this morning I just wished he'd stayed home or came here..."
Tala's mouth dropped open as he stared at him in shock. "You fucking what?" He managed thankfully in a hushed tone so young ears hadn't heard.
"You're shitting me..." Though why would Ray lie? If anything the puzzle was instantly solved now. All the years of bullshit and the code as to 'why' now finally cracked.
"Well I'll be damned... All makes perfect sense now on why he never got rid of the prick..."
Ray lightly chuckled, "Had the same reaction when he told me, but yeah. Made more sense in the end when he finally came clean about it."
Tala was still in disbelief, not sure as to why Kai had never mentioned it prior though who would wanna admit to being related to someone like that? Through marriage or not.
"Shit... Well, that answers that question then." He chuckled some before sticking his pen behind his ear, "Don't suppose either of you have heard anything from the police? On either of 'em?"
Why he still gave Bryan a second thought nowadays he didn't know. Would've loved to have seen his reaction to that revelation just now though...
"If he has, he hasn't said anything to me about it. Nor have I asked. So as far as I know they're gone with the wind, and personally I'd like it to stay that way." Ray answered, his attention having drawn back over to Thomas still playing around the poles on the stage as his stomach twisted in knots.
If anything happened to that little boy he'd never be able to forgive himself, nor would he go down without a fight just to protect him and Kai either.
Tala noticed the shift in the other male before he too looked over to Thomas.
"Well... No news is good news right?" He offered with a slight shrug, "Anyways, come and help me put all this away. If we start now maybe with two of us we can open as planned New Year's Eve..."
"Hn? Oh, yeah sure." Ray snapped out of it, following Tala behind the bar to get to work in putting away their load of gin and other bottles.
After a few hours of mindless counting and recounting bottles and boxes, stacking and moving around other bottles to make way for the newer ones, the front doors finally opened as Kai came waltzing into the place.
"Uncle Kai!" Thomas bounced right off the stage he'd been playing on and growing bored of for some time, having gone to laying on his stomach and watching Ray and Tala working while playing his Switch on and off to keep him occupied.
With the other two having been too wrapped in what they were doing, they hadn't even noticed him walking into the club until Thomas had shouted for him, Ray poking his head up over the bar top and using it to stand himself up off his aching knees.
"How's everything coming along?" Kai asked as he stopped to put a hand down on Thomas' head and greeting him, that same look on his face he had that morning coming over him the further into the club he got.
Although he'd been gearing up the entire four hour drive back over to come in, it took an extra twenty minutes to just get himself out of the Corvette and into the place.
Why now, after he'd been in and out of the place before, was he suddenly getting hit from all sides with bouts of anxiety and fear he didn't know.
Could only blame it on the dream he supposed.
"Yeah great, no thanks to you." The redhead teased, still facing the glass shelves as he arranged the mixers.
Ray sent a tut his way before shaking his head. "Ignore him. Would've been too crowded with three back here anyway." He waved off.
"How is she? All good?"
Kai barely heard him, having focused on a spot on the shelves Tala was fixing up and fixated on it.
Place looked good after it was nearly destroyed the last time actual bodies were in there, the bar hadn't really been touched, but when he came to check on it the one time he'd noticed some bottles were missing and other's knocked over.
How, or why, he wasn't sure. Could have happened during the brawl and hysteria that had gone on, or someone slipped themselves in when the place was shut down and helped themselves. He couldn't even lock his own house properly, so he highly doubted this place was locked up right after everything.
"I have some stuff I need to finalize in the office, if you need me I'll be there." He sent back without even responding to Ray's question, pulling away from Thomas' clutches around his hand and heading for the back stairs where he froze up for a minute more.
He was right here when he had her, not even four or five feet away... Surely... Surely he could have done something instead of letting her get dragged away?!
He shook himself out of it, getting the flashes of what transpired out of his head to go away before continuing up the stairs.
All Ray could do was watch him take himself off and upstairs, his own low spirited expression on his face now as Tala turned around at the off tone Kai had used.
"You two okay?" He cautiously asked, furrowing his brows some.
"I thought we were..." Ray answered in his own off tone, not so sure himself now. Things were fine, great, amazing even. So... Just what was that?
"He um..." He paused for a minute, turning back around to face Tala. "He had a dream last night, didn't tell me what it was or anything, but came down clammy like he was sweating and all out of whack... Maybe it's just that?" He asked, hoping for some kind of back up.
Tala thought for a moment, glanced up to the glass above them then back to Ray. "Probably just nerves over the reopen perhaps? I gotta admit coming in here myself this morning had me feeling a type of way. Some PTSD shit probably. He'll be fine..." He assured.
"Once we get back into the swing of things it'll be like we never left. Just, minus one I guess... But we gained one too, huh little buddy?" He sent down to Thomas from behind the bar.
"You gonna work with me and Uncle Ray back here?"
"No!" Thomas laughed, "I'm gonna be a firefighter!" He shouted and ran back to the poles.
Ray snorted on a laugh, "At least that's something to call it..." He mused in a chuckle.
"Oh okay then!" Tala too laughed out before grabbing a glass and heading to the sink. "Come back here then Mr. Firefighter cos we got ourselves a little fire to put out upstairs."
Thomas came running back to the bar and lifted up his hands as Tala stepped from behind and passed him the glass, kneeling down to his height he pointed at the door Kai had left through.
"See that door over there in the corner? If you go through there, there's some steps, go up and then there's another door at the top. Uncle Kai'll be inside. Go take him some water, okay?"
"Okay!" Thomas nodded, holding the glass like it was something precious and carefully started walking away towards the stairs like he was told to do.
The farther Thomas got away from them, Ray watching him go, his hand came out and slapped Tala in the arm.
"Oh my God I have to tell you what he did last night!" He went off in an excited hushed whisper, "But you have to promise you won't tell Kai I told you."
Tala's head snapped to him at the hit, his hand coming to rub his arm though wasn't even mad as he got presented with tea immediately after.
"Promise... Go on..." He coyly pressed, his own swirl of excitement churning for the gossip.
"Okay, so after you two left..."
Carrying up the precious water to put out the fire upstairs, Thomas precariously walked up them to the top where the door Tala had said would be.
It had been closed; his hands were full so when he got up to it he loaded up his lungs by inhaling a deep breath.
"UNCLE KAIIIII!"
Behind the closed door Kai jolted from where he sat behind his desk, the paper he was going over being nearly shoved off the top of it as his heart rate kicked up at being startled out of his damn mind suddenly.
Since he'd gone in and sat down, he'd done his space cadet routine, staring off at nothing in particular as memories flooded into his head until he shook it off and picked up the closest paper near him to look over.
With his head too cloudy, he'd read the same first two lines over at least twenty times now, not absorbing anything that was laid out in front of him.
Was this the water bill? The mortgage? Or just everyday junk mail?
Hell if he knew.
Easing himself up from his desk, seeing as how Thomas didn't open the door after calling for him, he went over and opened it up for him.
"Everything okay, Thomas?" He asked, brow slightly going up as he clocked onto the little guy with a glass of water in hand.
Thomas lifted it up to him as high as he could in both hands. "Uncle Tala told me to bring this up to you for the fire."
"Fire?" Kai questioned back though took the cup of water from him anyways, "Um... Well thanks. What've you been doing?"
Thomas took it upon himself to wander in past him once his hands were free, running straight up to one way windows and peering downstairs with his hands cupped at either side of his face as he stood on his tip-toes.
"Playing firefighters! On those down there." He pointed before waving, "Uncle Ray! Uncle Tala!"
Kai followed him on instinct, sipping at the water and smirked a little. "They can't see or hear you Thomas, but firefighters huh?" He mused, least it was better than calling it what it really was.
He wondered if Ray ever had to play 'firefighter' during his pole days...
It wasn't like he had a set theme for his girls, they did what they wanted. Something Ming-Ming had suggested to him when they continued their talks after their first encounter.
Said it was better for the girls to pick out their own routines, costumes, things like that and like always he shrugged his shoulders and said 'done' and it was done.
He'd never watched them for the same kind of thrill his patrons came in for, but more or less just because she wanted him there and after a while, after he got used to it, he actually enjoyed coming down outside of his office to just mingle with everyone.
Was even her idea to host the employee only nights, a way for him to really get to know the others that worked for him and keep the other's spirits up and just enjoy the club like it was their own private paradise.
He never imagined that paradise could have turned into hell so quickly...
Glancing down at the head of blue hair, his heart clenched. Why did he have to look so much like her?
"Little more to the left, no, too far, go back. You want it in the center! Goddd! Is that too complicated?!" Ming-Ming hollered, wearing a lot more than what Kai was used to seeing as she whipped the tradesmen into shape currently erecting the stripper poles on the stage.
"Yes! Perfect!" She sent a thumbs up before turning back to Kai, "Have you thought about where you're putting the DJ booth?"
"Nah, I was just gonna let you have at it." He chuckled back to her, arms about his chest and a smirk on his lips as he stood back and watched her.
For such a small little thing, she sure was scary and definitely not someone he wanted to piss off. He'd made note of that two months after meeting her and their morning coffee talks became more of a routine.
It was close to a year now, since he met her, dragged her off in the middle of the night away from Robert's place, and as promised she'd come along with him on this crazy ride of setting up a club of his own with Johnny. Though, like always, Johnny was nowhere to be seen.
He honestly didn't know what he'd do without her right now.
"Good, cos it's going there." She pointed to the corner before throwing him a grin.
With the sounds of drills, hammers and other power tools going off the little bundle that was nestled in the stroller behind them stirred, a small whine murmuring before a full on cry erupted.
"Aw Kai just take him out and give him a cuddle will you, I need to go and grab his bottle from the car." She said before rushing off through the entrance and out to the parking lot.
Kai's smirk got wiped off his face as if she'd come up and kissed him full on the mouth, stuttering and spluttering at her to come back but she was already gone.
He turned to Thomas in the stroller, pale face draining of color as the infant's gained color and went red amongst his screaming.
He'd never held him before... Didn't even really know how to do such a simple thing. What if he dropped him?! Worse though… If he didn't she'd yell at him...
"Alright, it's okay?" He tried to soothe as he stiffly walked up to the stroller, looking at the harness wrapped around him and fumbled with the clasps a few times.
"How the f-... Suppose you don't know how to do this, huh..." He huffed at the screaming babe, finally getting the harness to click and let him loose.
He forced his hands to stop shaking as he cradled around Thomas's head, pulling him up into his broad chest and stood perfectly still until Ming came back.
Thankfully, she wasn't long, though Thomas had seemed to calm some anyway at the strong hold around him.
"Awwww my baby boy!" Ming cooed, only able to stroke at his back with Kai's height.
"Suits you." She teased before holding out the bottle, "I'll let you feed him if you want?"
Kai just stared at her, having even gone to holding his breath with Thomas in his arms. One wrong move and he wasn't sure what could happen.
"No, no. Take him back." He nearly spat out in a panic.
"Oh stop being a ninny! Come on! Sit." She ordered, pushing him along to one of the brand spanking new leather booths and made him ease into it.
"So you wanna move him from your chest and hold him like this." She demoed for him like she was cradling a baby, "He's not going to break Kai and you won't drop him."
"How do you know that?!" Kai spat back just as uneasily, heart now beating in his chest faster.
Was she insane?! He wasn't cut out for this? He didn't even like children!
He caught the look she was giving him and zipped his mouth shut like a bad child, looking down at Thomas's head and back.
Least if he did drop him it wasn't that far of a fall now...
Carefully, like the baby was made of glass, he moved him around like Ming had shown him and cradled him in one arm and held out his hand for the bottle.
Oh God... What if he drowned the poor thing?!
Ming-Ming pressed her lips together as a laugh threatened to escape her. Ohh the little lamb.
She handed Kai the bottle and big eyes that mirrored hers stared up at him. A small gurgle coming from Thomas' toothless little mouth at the sight of it and in turn his mouth opened more.
"Least he knows what he's doing..." Kai muttered under his breath and popped the bottle into the awaiting mouth.
Thomas instantly suckled on it, amber eyes looking to his new food giver before they slipped closed content.
"See... Total natural." Ming praised; arms loosely folded over her chest as she watched on.
"I'll burp him when you're done don't worry." She chuckled, "One step at a time."
Kai didn't even hear her, much less looking at her as his attention was solely on the little weight in his arms as a small smile stretched along his face.
A little tear rolled down Kai's cheek as the memory continued to play out in his head, quickly wiping it away the second he felt it trickling down his skin before Thomas looked up and noticed it.
He may not have liked kids, still didn't, but this one he'd do anything for. He was only two when Ming came to him about becoming his godfather, after her own mother died from cancer.
He was all she had left to turn to, and in a big way, she was all he had for a long time too. He really didn't know where he'd be, how he'd be, without her.
He knew, had known all along, that everything he did for her and those around him wouldn't erase the sins of his past, but to him and to her it made a difference for the effort he put into it all.
If he could, he'd do it all over for her. If he could change one thing, it would be saving her life by giving up his own.
"H-hey Thomas..." He swallowed, clearing his throat the second he noticed how it wavered.
"Let's get out of here, get some dinner. Uncle Tala and Ray should be done now." He urged, holding his hand out for Thomas' little one.
"Chicken nuggets!" He giddily shouted, reaching for Kai's hand and letting him lead the way back downstairs.
"Wait, so you had it on the entire day? Under your shirt?" Tala asked, the laughter they'd shared from earlier having simmered down now. Oh this tale was gold.
Ray nodded, his cheeks having been painted in a permanent blush after having to relive the most embarrassing thing in his life (and that was saying something.)
"I was surprised he never noticed it!" He laughed back, "Or even you when you hugged me bye." He cackled.
"I swear I had no clue! My god, my best friend, an absolute deviant. Who'da thought? Just when you think you know a guy..." Tala shook his head, feigning disbelief before locking on the boss and the little dude that had just emerged from the door in the corner.
"Oh he's resurfaced. Hey Mr. Firefighter! Did you put out the fire?"
"I did! And we're getting chicky nuggets!" Thomas cheered as he bounced alongside Kai.
Ray just continued to laugh, it always warmed his heart when he saw Thomas excited, even if it was over the smallest of things. Though his laughter cut short when he noticed the look on Kai's face the closer they got, his heart dropping again.
He didn't look any better from that morning or when he walked away from them. Was it still the dream bothering him? Or was it something else?
"Well, we can always grab some on the way home since it's getting kind of late. How's that sound?" Ray asked more to Kai than to Thomas.
Kai looked up from his feet he'd been watching as he walked, shrugging his shoulders at him in response.
"Not hungry, whatever you two want." He sent.
Even Tala's expression shifted some at that. The dismissive tone used hard to ignore.
"You alright bud?" He asked him, "If you're worried about the reopening at all, don't be, everything'll be fine. We all know what we're doing."
Kai shook his head at him, he knew that. Wasn't worried in the slightest about any of that.
"I'm fine." He said, bringing Thomas up to Ray and passing him off, "See you at home." Was all he gave him, no kiss on the lips or even on the cheek before he'd turned around and headed for the doors and fished out his keys to leave.
Tala pressed his lips together, not really sure what to say to fill the silence.
The hell was up with the guy? He was more than fine yesterday. Had the best night of his life according to Ray too. He knew the guy could be dramatic but all this just over a dream? Didn't seem right... Something else was clearly bothering him.
"See... He's fine..." He sent trying to lift the mood some though by the look on Ray's face he was far from amused.
Ray just clicked his tongue at him, not sure what he could even say with Thomas standing between them.
"Well, if you want you can come with us for some chicken nuggets." He offered, grabbing Thomas's coat off the bar stool and helping him thread his arms through the sleeves.
Tala shrugged to him accepting. Wasn't like he had anything else to do now everything was pretty much set up here. Julia was over at her brother's today prolonging the festive activities so he could do with something to refrain him from pining for her.
"Lead the way Tommy boy!"
After an hour of pleasant conversations and stuffed on chicken nuggets, Thomas and Ray slipped through the front door.
Helping Thomas out of his coat, Ray looked around and frowned some. He'd messaged Kai before they left the diner, let him know they were on their way back but hadn't received anything in reply. Nor was the master of the house even downstairs to greet either of them.
"Alright, up to the bath with you." Ray shooed, hanging their coats on the hooks by the doors as Thomas bolted right up the stairs.
Before he went after him, Ray checked the office right by the front door and frowned even more when the room came up empty. With a sigh, he wandered out towards the back doors and peeked out though like the office it was empty out there and dark.
Whatever was going on, and so suddenly too, he didn't know but he cared to know, and he was hell bent now on finding out what it was that had gotten to Kai so badly.
With Thomas in the shower, he went right to the master bedroom and paused.
There on the bed, fast asleep, Kai was laid out on his back. Not even undressed, just his shoes off, with his hand over his chest and the other arm draped over his eyes on top of the sheets.
Whatever problems they were fixing to face he guessed could wait till morning. Maybe Kai was just tired and that was why he had been off all day.
Getting Thomas in bed and his story read, he crawled into bed next to Kai. Curling up beside him like he always did, only for Kai to lightly stir in his sleep and roll away and put his back to him.
Ray couldn't help but feel the slight sting in his heart at that, though still moved in closer and draped his arm around Kai's shoulder as he spooned him.
Maybe tomorrow would be better?
Somewhere in the middle of the night, Ray eventually rolled away. Sleeping back to back with Kai peacefully, the house in a content silence when it was suddenly disturbed by a hard shuddering gasp.
Kai's body jolted, legs kicking off the covers Ray had thrown over him, his body shaking again like the night before and covered in a sweat as he gasped and panted for air.
It wasn't fire this time, but the loud bang of a gunshot now ringing in his ears. Bodies dropping around him, bloodied and lifeless. He couldn't save them... He couldn't do anything...
"Kai! Baby, it's okay, it's okay." Ray cooed, instantly sitting himself up and cupping at his clammy face to turn him to face him.
"I'm here, you're okay... Just breathe..." He stroked at his cheek, the terrified look on Kai's face breaking his heart.
Even with the calming hands on him, the soothing voice in his ears, Kai's body continued to tremble as he gasped in for air.
Was another goddamn dream... That's all it was... But only slightly true. Ming was dead. And as it still stood, he couldn't do anything about it.
"I'm sorry..." His voice cracked back as it shook out of him, fighting back the tears that were suddenly coming to his eyes.
"Talk to me Kai..." Ray pleaded in a breath, thumbs catching the tears that had trickled down his cheeks.
"Tell me what's going on... Did you have another nightmare? What's happening in them?" He didn't want to overload him with questions, but he felt so helpless right now.
The man he loved and undeniably the strongest person he knew, quivering in fear beside him, struggling to catch his breath and he didn't know what he could do to help him!
Kai shook his head, that same feeling he had that morning coming back in. It was just a dream, that's all it was. Nothing he had to go and worry Ray over with.
He gathered himself up, taking in a heavy yet shaky breath and put his hands over Ray's.
"I-it's fine... I'm fine. Go back to sleep." His hoarse voice whispered, pulling out from Ray's soothing touch and crawled off the bed. He needed a damn drink...
Ray had reached out as Kai pulled away from him, softly murmuring his name before he left the bedroom. There was no talking to him when he was like this. Kai needed to calm himself down before he even thought about opening up.
Though, this behavior was starting to feel all too familiar, and he feared it was going to get a lot worse before it got better...
Ray let his arm drop down to the sheets and a long sigh escaped his nose as he checked the time on his phone.
He hadn't seen 3am in a long while. Not since they'd all been off work. But there was no way he could drop off again now even though Kai had told him to. He could say he was fine all he wanted, but this wasn't the actions of someone who was fine...
Exhaling another sigh he laid himself back into the sheets and stared up at the ceiling. Kai would talk to him when he was ready... He hoped.
Checking his phone every so often since the bedroom door never opened up again and two hours had passed since Kai left, Ray's eyes finally gave out on him and he passed back out while Kai stayed in his office nursing the bottle of whiskey Ray had gotten him after having gone out for a few smokes.
Even with the alcohol and nicotine in his system he was still shaking, maybe even more so than when he first woke up.
He wasn't understanding any of it, of course he'd had nightmares before, who didn't? And although he'd only had two in the space of two nights, they were already getting out of hand.
Things were good, really good, so why now?! Why now did his subconscious decide to jump out and remind him of how terrible everything actually was buried beneath the surface?
He wasn't a stranger to losing people in his life. His mother, father, and step-mother were all gone... Along with his grandfather, finally... So why was this one hitting him so hard and so fast again?
Staring into his fifth glass of whiskey as if it would have the answers, his own eyes began to get heavy again and film over with the familiar sting of tears.
It's because out of all of them, despite loving his father and even Johnny's mother, he didn't love them the way he loved her.
She was his first real friend, and a damn good one at that compared to all the shitty ones he'd ever made in his life leading up to her. Made what he somewhat wanted a reality, gave him everything that he could have ever asked for.
When he told her about Johnny, she kept it quite like he'd asked her to do. When he told her about himself and being the way he was she didn't shun him or tell anyone either.
She was one of a kind...
And he missed her something awful.
He thought he'd be done with the tears, the bad feelings and thoughts, especially when he had so much to look forward to, and the love he had now surrounding him, but they came out anyways and rolled down his face.
Setting his glass down on the desk, he pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes to try and tame them, a shuddering sob cutting through the quiet of his office as his shoulders shook.
The longer he sat there, surrounded by the sounds of his own crying, the more his sorrow turned into anger.
All she'd ever done was stood by him, helped him, and he'd gone and done what he always did. Put Johnny above everyone else, and for what? Because they were 'brothers'?
They weren't even blood! The prick didn't care, hadn't cared about him for a long time. Nor did he even care for his own flesh and blood that was currently growing inside his wife's womb.
It was excuse after excuse, why he couldn't get rid of him and every night he'd have to come up with a new one to appease the others and keep his employees, his friends safety at risk.
And for WHAT now?!
To have one of them buried six feet in the ground?!
Leaving a child without his mother?!
With the burning anger swirling, mixing in with the heartbreak and alcohol, he quickly swiped up the still half full glass off the desk almost blindly and threw it across the room, the glass shattering on impact as the liquid splashed across the beige wall and began to run down the paint as the glass scattered across the carpet.
Having stood up from his chair to toss the glass, his chest now heaving like he was out of breath, he planted his palms down on the desk to steady himself as more tears fell onto the wood below him, arms shaking again with the built up rage.
With the sunrise around 7am Ray's eyes drowsily opened again and to no surprise he was alone; Kai obviously having made no attempt to come back to bed.
He stretched himself out before groggily making his way to the bathroom and creeping downstairs, unsure as to what he was going to see when he got down there.
Having peaked into Thomas's room first and seeing him still fast asleep he figured he'd leave him until he woke on his own. See if he could sort this fire out by himself first...
Just as he made it down the stairs, the back door opened, and Kai came walking into the house. Coffee mug in hand and reeking of smoke as it clung around his chilled body, almost spilling what was in his mug over himself at seeing Ray there suddenly.
"Jesus! When did you get up?" He asked in a panic, he was getting tired of being scared in his own home...
"Just now... Sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump." Ray answered a little guilty as he stepped over to him. He looked like shit. He was exhausted he could tell.
"What do you want me to make you for breakfast?" He asked, not wanting to jump down his throat just yet with questions as he caressed the broad chest in front of him.
"Can have whatever you want. We got bacon, eggs... You tell me."
Kai shook his head, "Not hungry, thanks though." He answered, not even able to smile down at him like he used to, and he didn't even know why.
Pulling away to go and get in a shower, he paused. "Don't go in the office right now." He didn't need Ray seeing the state he'd gone and put it in when his anger took over full blast during the night.
"Why not?" Ray questioned, turning his head to follow him. He had no reason to go in anyway, but he definitely was now...
Kai paused at the stairs again, something about the question and lack of sleep and just... Everything setting his nerves on fire.
"Just don't!" He yelled back at him, head snapping towards Ray where he left him.
Ray had jumped at the sudden shout, the look in Kai's eyes telling him to not take a step further though his own slight anger swirled.
He'd done nothing to this guy, and he was going to treat him like this?! He was starting to lose his already thin patience. His own interrupted sleep putting him in a foul mood.
He bit his tongue though, standing there in silence as Kai tore his eyes off him and continued his ascend up the stairs.
It was okay. He was just tired. Clearly had another bad dream and he shouldn't take it personally. He'd let him shower, cool off, and then maybe they could talk about this.
Once he heard their bedroom door close Ray looked to the office door and of course walked straight to it. Cautiously opening it up he peered inside before pushing it open fully and his mouth fell open.
Shards of glass lay scattered all over the carpeted floor along with sheets of paper and files. What pictures were in there before were now torn off the walls, their frames broken and glasses cracked. The desk chair too was knocked over, the bottom of it snapped into pieces and it's wheels amongst the rest of the mess, while splashes of golden liquid stained all four walls.
No. He wasn't having this. Kai can raise his voice and smoke all the cigarettes he wanted but he wasn't dealing with violent outbursts like this. The room was trashed. This needed to stop before it even fully started.
Ray took himself back upstairs, taking another peak in Thomas' room and surprisingly Kai hadn't woken him. Once he was out of the shower though he couldn't guarantee it wouldn't be him that would stir the sleeping child.
After standing for longer than he probably should have under the hot water until it went from as hot as he could have made it to freezing cold, Kai finally stepped out.
He shouldn't have snapped at Ray like that, he knew that. No excuse was good enough, not when all Ray had ever done was stand beside him through everything the past two months and that included their first run-ins as boss and employee.
Not to mention, he had Thomas to think about on top of it all. He neither wanted nor needed Thomas to witness just how low he could go and be, especially to the man he loved.
He saw enough of abuse in his young life, didn't need the cycle to continue...
With a towel loosely wrapped around his hips, another going through his hair as he went over mentally all his apologies to Ray, he came out of the bathroom only to jump out of his own skin again as he caught sight of Ray up on their bed waiting for him.
Whatever he had come up with, which was probably neither enough or good enough, vanished off the tip of his tongue as he looked into those hurt and angered eyes of his lover.
For once in his life, he never felt so small than right there like Ray was making him feel even if he hadn't said anything to him yet.
Ray's eyes had bounced up and down his wet figure before pushing down whatever thoughts he dared to have that moment and switched back to pissed.
Curse him for being so ridiculously hot...
"I suggest you start talking Kai because you're not leaving this room until you tell me what's going on in that head of yours."
Kai's mouth opened a few times and closed just as much before he went to his go to of shrugging his shoulders.
"I don't know... I'm sorry for snapping at you though."
Ray's expression softened some at the apology though he still had questions.
"It's okay... But that doesn't explain to me why you did it in the first place." He stated, eyes remaining on the other.
"I know you said to not go in your office but, what the hell possessed you to lash out like that huh? Talk to me Kai. What happened last night?"
Kai stared at him, knowing it was wrong to get angry again, but what was with this one that when he gave an order and it always going over his head?!
"I told you not to!" He snapped again, "For that very reason, I said stay out of there and you went in anyways. Why don't you just listen to me for once?!"
"Because if I always listened to you Kai nothing would ever get resolved!" He yelled, rising to his feet.
"If I listened to you every time you told me to 'leave you alone' or just 'drop it' where would we be now, huh? Oh, let me tell you. There would be no we! There'd be no us! It would just be you. All by yourself, lashing out and then what? You smoke and drink yourself stupid. Alright then what?"
Ray's chest was heaving in and out of him as he held his hands out waiting for the answer he knew Kai couldn't give him.
"Let me fucking help you, Kai. How many times do we have to go down this road? Talk to me! What's going on?"
"I keep telling you I don't know!" Kai's voice bellowed out of him; the towel he'd been using on his hair being thrown onto the bed.
"And unless you can fucking bring her back, then there's nothing you can do, Ray!"
Ray faltered at that, his arms slowly lowering back down to his sides as he stared over at the other.
He'd never expect Kai to just 'get over it.' Ming-Ming was a huge part of his life. You don't just get over something like that, but was the time doing nothing for him? He'd seemed to have been coping well the past few weeks.
What had brought this on? What had sparked all of this? All he could think of was the fact they were returning to the last place Kai saw her. He knew it would be somewhat difficult, but he didn't imagine it would bring them back to square one...
"Why are you shouting?" Came a small sleepy voice from the doorway.
Ray turned to look over his shoulder to see Thomas stood in his pajamas and rubbing at one of his eyes.
He glanced back to Kai before heading over to the young boy. "Sorry Tommy did we wake you? Let's go and get you some breakfast, huh?"
Kai just closed his mouth, was better that way now that they'd, or maybe more so him than Ray, had woken Thomas up.
This was exactly what he wanted to avoid... Didn't need to have Thomas waking up because he couldn't control his damn temper. Lasting alcohol in his veins and sleep deprivation or not.
"I'm sorry..." He managed again in a small whisper just before Ray ushered Thomas out of the room.
The rest of the day and all through Friday and Saturday were quiet. Kai spending a lot of his time in his office preparing whatever needed to be done for the reopening after cleaning up his own mess, whilst Ray tended to Thomas mostly and did his own thing too.
A few more snaps at each other had occurred naturally. Both just tired and frustrated with the other that when night came they automatically slept with their backs to each other. Although it'd only been a few days, Ray was already tired of it and didn't want a third night like they'd been having.
"What, he's still in a funk?" Tala asked over the phone before exhaling a sigh. "I'd say I'd talk to him if you want, though, I don't know what I can say that you probably haven't already."
"No, no... As much as I appreciate it, I also don't want to deal with the blow up that could bring on. I just needed an ear..." Ray sighed back to him and rubbing at the bridge of his nose as he closed his eyes.
Although Tala was coming from a good place, it really was the last thing Ray wanted right now. Could potentially add fuel to Kai's stupid jealousy over the two of them or get on his case about running to Tala when they were always seeming to butt heads.
"I just.. I don't know what to do now. Last night I tried to just give him a blowjob in the shower, thought maybe it'd help loosen him up, and he stormed out as if I was trying to stick my dick up his ass."
Tala snorted. "No need since he clearly already has something up there..."
He let out another sigh before he shook his head. Who the hell walks away from a blowjob?! Mad man!
"How's the little guy been during all this? He might be young but he ain't stupid. He's gonna sense something's off between you both."
"He can tell something's up, keeps asking Kai to come play with him or asking me why he won't or why we're always fighting now. Keeps telling me he doesn't want us to fight, and I really don't know what to say to him but just change the subject and pep him up for school that's fixing to start again." Ray answered, sounding completely defeated at this point.
"I've mentioned it to Kai too, and that just makes him more angry and then we don't talk for the rest of the day or night. He won't eat anything but drinking and smoking is absolutely fine." He bit out sarcastically.
Tala muttered an insult meant for the male in question. He really was a stubborn ass and a glutton for punishment clearly.
"You both need to just give your heads a shake and sort it out. Go out or something. Spend some time together." He suggested. "Nice meal, few drinks. Get that leather thing out again..."
It was Ray's turn to snort, but it was more in a mock than agreement until the suggestion given actually began to swirl a bit inside his head.
"Only problem Tal... We have Thomas." He voiced in a dull tone.
"So I'll watch him?" Came the simple response and without seeing it Ray knew the redhead had shrugged. "Sleepover at Uncle Tal's. Boom."
"A-are you sure?" Ray questioned before cutting himself over, "Don't answer that, how soon can you come pick him up?!"
Tala looked to the clock over on the wall. "Could prolly be there in like an hour?"
"Alright, I'll get him packed and ready! You're the best, seriously! Thank you!" Ray yelled into the phone and hung up before Tala could even respond back to him, bouncing off the bed and running into Thomas' room across the hall to get him ready to go.
Luckily, although it wasn't really the plan, Kai hadn't come out of his office the entire time Ray was busy packing and repacking, making sure Thomas had everything he might need minus the kitchen sink.
He'd never had to pack for a kid for a sleepover, trying to remember whatever it was he took when he was Thomas' age to his own sleepovers.
Games, check, underwear, check, pillow and blankets, check and check. Spare clothes and just...
Maybe he was packing too much...
Didn't matter because by the time he was still fretting over it all Tala messaged him to let him know he was there for the bundle of joy.
"Thomas let's go!" Ray hollered as he came barreling down the stairs with the stuffed-over duffel bag.
"Alright, you be good. You hear me? Mind your manners and listen to your Uncle Tala. Understand me?" He lightly scolded as he helped Thomas into his coat by the door when the office door opened and crimson eyes took in the sight.
"What's going on?" Kai asked apprehensively. Were they just running away and not going to tell him?!
"Me and Uncle Tala are having a sleepover!" Thomas answered for him whilst he bounced as Ray tried to zip up his coat.
He managed it and rose to his feet, opening up the front door to see the redhead parked up on the drive.
Tala sent a wave and opened up the car door as Thomas bound over and jumped into the car. Thankfully, Julia had a car seat he could borrow that she used for her brother's kids.
"Just text me sometime tomorrow alright and I'll bring him back over." He called over to Ray at the door who sent him a nod and more gratitude.
Waving them off he closed the door behind him with a slight shiver before looking over to Kai.
"Hungry?" He asked, though when Kai opened his mouth to give a predictable 'no' in response he was immediately cut off.
"-Don't care! Get ready 'cos we're going out."
Before Kai could even object Ray was already skipping up the stairs to go shower, stupid grin on his face like a naughty child.
Kai blinked at the back of Ray's head, tired mind trying to process what the hell just happened and why. He didn't know why, but his feet followed after him regardless.
"Where are we going?" He asked in a stupid tone.
"Wherever you plan on taking me." Ray chirpily responded from the bathroom; his clothes being thrown out as he undressed before the water started running.
"I... I wasn't..." Kai stuttered, eyes catching the clothes being tossed out and onto the floor. The hell was going on?!
He stepped into the bathroom, mind set on one thing and that was to find out just what the hell was go-hello...
His feet stopped mid-way in the bathroom, eyes glued to the naked and lean figure behind the glass as water cascaded down tanned skin.
What did he come in here for again?
"...We um... Wouldn't you rather stay in, with Thomas gone and all?" He asked as his mouth dried.
"Why? So you can brood in your office while I watch TV in the living room?" He saved him a glance as he massaged the shampoo into his scalp, "No. We're going out somewhere. So decide where you wanna eat."
Kai pouted some at that, he did not brood! "Fine! Guess we can go to the harbor. Hurry up." He slightly huffed at him as he turned to leave and get changed.
Ray kept his eyes closed though smirked as he stood under the water and let the bubbles wash away. Hurry up he says... He's seen the length of his hair right? Pah!
Pouting the whole time as he rummaged through the closet, Kai scanned through all his shirts he had and found himself pouting harder until it turned into a scowl. First time out in forever and he had nothing but shit to wear!
This is why he suggested to just stay home, didn't have to wear anything then. Oh sure, Ray, get on your knees last night when he wasn't in the mood and now that he is let's go out instead. Why was he so complicating?!
Snatching a long sleeve black button down from the hanger with a grumble, Kai finally came out of the closet and proceeded to peel off the lounge wear he'd been in the past two days.
Could probably do with another shower too himself honestly... Nah, just spray some cologne and go. Not like he hadn't done it before (at least when he was a teenager).
"You done yet?" He hollered through to the opened bathroom door.
"Oh my god, stop your bellyaching." Ray sent in a bored tone as he meandered back in. Hair towel dried and in a long braid, he let his towel drop to the floor as he stepped to his dresser and began his search for his attire tonight.
Kai's eyes went down. He did that on purpose...
"You sure you don't want to stay in?" He asked again.
Hearing Kai's tone caused a wicked smirk to grace his face again as he continued to rummage with his back facing him. Oh noowwww he wants him?! Oh he was gonna have him gagging for it before the night was through...
"Yeah, I'm sure." Ray voiced, pulling out some dark jeans and chucking them on the bed. "What? You don't want to?" He asked, turning round and sashaying to his underwear drawer.
Kai stuttered, not even trying to hide the fact he was shamelessly eyeing Ray up and down.
Yes, he was very sure he'd rather just stay home where it was warm, where he could make them both very warm and just brush all this craziness under the rug instead of potentially having to air it all out in a public space.
Yet, at the same time. It had been forever, at least where it was just them since they had Thomas now. And it was a place he kept promising to take Ray too and he owed him at least some kind of explanation for everything these past few days and try and make it up to him.
"No. No it's fine. Whatever you want." He answered after a silence had found them, going and getting himself dressed finally.
It seemed like forever since the two of them were able to sit in Kai's Corvette. The sporty car completely unsuitable for a family but being child free for the night the two seater was pulled from the garage and the engine roared back to life: The familiar sound bringing a small smile to Kai's lips.
Ray stared out of the window as they drove along, taking in the streetlights that twinkled as dusk was more than upon them now. The car was quiet though comfortable. Some of the tension having evaporated as the two engaged in small talk as they got ready.
"You sure I look okay for this place?" Ray asked, not sure how fancy this restaurant was on the harbor. He couldn't believe they were finally going after it being mentioned so many times in the past.
Kai glanced over; the faint smile he'd been wearing the whole time only stretching out more.
"You always look good. But yeah, they don't have a dress code like the rooftop does. You're fine."
Ray nodded to him, letting the silence fall upon them again as he played with the end of his braid over his shoulder.
"Maybe I should text Tal and see how Thomas is doing." He thought out loud before chuckling. "Kids probably running him ragged."
"Let him." Kai smirked, "Do him some good, and if there's a problem he'd call us." He said, moving his hand across the center console and taking up Ray's.
"Let's... Focus on us right now... Okay?"
Ray's cheeks flushed a little, tightening his hold on Kai's hand and sent him a nod. "Yeah, you're right, he'd let us know." He agreed, stroking his thumb on the fair skin and lapping up the affection he hadn't received in days.
"I'm sure he's fine."