But the Rhythms (Just Out Of Time)
When Quinn imagined living the starving artist lifestyle, it was never exactly like this. Sure, she knew there would be days when all she had was stale coffee and poor excuses for sandwiches. Certainly, she'd anticipated the days where she had to decide if she was going to pay the electric or hot water bill. (It is always electric.) Yes, she'd prepared mentally for the cold nights, and never being quite full, all of it, in the sake of art, expression, freedom.
What she had not prepared for was her.
Calm as the eye of a hurricane yet, fierce as their winds.
It was there, in that moment when Santana Lopez came into Quinn's life that she found herself for the first time enraptured.
While her mind may have embellished the memory as time moved further on, there is one thing she would forever remember with clarity. The way she felt. The uptick of her heartbeat followed by the swift intake of breath. Then there was something. A familiarity, a longing, a knowing.
Something quiet and still. The releasing of the previous held breath.
Finally.
In the small front room of their professor's home that late January afternoon, as she heard her say her name for the first time, holding out a hand in introduction, she knew. She knew and peculiarly kept it to herself. Daring not to tell a soul, not even Santana herself. Instead she waited and watched as things fell into place. Some things fell like jagged fragments only barely fitting together while others fell perfect as the way Santana's hand fits into hers.
"I'm not ready for a relationship." Santana had said a few days after Valentine's Day, breaking the moment. After an evening spent in each other's company with conversation that flowed from everything from hopes and dreams to the things that hurt, Quinn walked her to her dorm. In the future, when Quinn recalls the specific memory, she always remembers the thick snow flakes falling into Santana's hair, her brown eyes looking up into hers, and the clause to her previous statement. "Right now." She continued, knitting her eyebrows together in hope Quinn would understand her sentiment. Her hope.
To say the least, Quinn did. And as the snow melted and the days became longer and they traded their pea coats and parkas for rain coats, "right now" grew further and further away. Before she knew it, it was mid-May. Finals had finished, her roommate had gone home for summer and Santana was standing in her doorway. "I came to say goodbye." She said as Quinn rose from her desk, wrapping her arms around her. "I miss you already." Quinn replied, holding on a little bit longer. It was there in the silence with the warmth of the sun coming in through the window at her back and the warmth of the woman she loved in her arms she felt it. Complete.
She still gets that feeling now. And on occasion she'll think back to that mid-May afternoon. When she pulled back and found those brown eyes alight in the sun, she recognized that look. She had seen that look before, the same yet so very different in that moment."I needed to tell you." Santana had said, bringing her hands back to herself, clasping them together in front of her. "And I know this is bad timing, with me leaving and you staying, but I don't want to go this whole summer without you knowing." She took a deep breath, bracing herself.
"That I love you." She said. So sure. So simple. Plain as the days are long. "And I'm ready. If you are."
A/N: What is this? Idk. Lol. A preview of sorts. Happy New Year!