A/N: Greetings, long time no post. Just like every other human life gets away from me and finding time to write is difficult. I know I go a long time between posting chapters, but you should all know that I think about these stories daily and am committed to finishing them. I have the next 3 chapters of this story written.

For all those that have commented know that I appreciate it so much and it helps me know that people are still somewhat interested in this. I vow to respond to every review this time around.

Someone requested I write a summary of what has occurred in the story at this point. I've sat on this chapter long enough that I didn't want a summary to hinder me from posting. Maybe on the next one.

Thanks for reading.

CHAPTER 16

EPOV

I don't know how she couldn't feel how hard I was restraining myself from rubbing my body up against hers. She smelled so good, I'm sure being in Niall's presence heightened her fragrance, or maybe it was the kiss he placed upon her forehead. I was sure there was more purpose to the kiss than just a show of remorse and caring. He had done something to make her heal faster, I was sure of it. Even vampire blood could not heal her injuries this fast. God her smell. I tried to distract myself by looking at the darkening sky.

But it was more than her smell. I could feel her fully, not dulled in pain or unconscious. It was distracting and unsettling, but it felt amazing. Being around her made me feel so alive. She was a vibrating livewire smothering my soul. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her. What had happened with her alter ego Susannah? How could she see? What did Niall want? Did the bond feel as good to her as it did to me?

Without whatever Fae magic was poisoning the bond I felt calm and relaxed being near her. I no longer felt angry and spiteful that she was hiding herself from me. She was here. And then I just couldn't restrain myself any longer. I was not sorry that I had pushed her boundaries and grasped her in my arms. I didn't care if she lost control and burned me, feeling her in the bond was everything, and I would fight anyone, even her, to be by her side. I think the bond would kill me if we were separated again. The true death. Somehow I knew she was having similar thoughts as she crossed one arm across her chest to place her hand on her heart. I could feel her in the bond, trying to push that feeling away, that we had slowly been dying from our separation.

She needed to be distracted. The compound was becoming more alive as staff moved about and we were so enthralled by one another that we were becoming the center of attention, making her stiffen up. So logically, I asked her on a date. I could feel the bond hammering with her shock at my question. Then a flicker of pleasure. Her amusement made me happy. I couldn't stop laughing at her exasperation, even as we entered Godric's office.

SPOV

"It's good to see you up and about, Susannah." I could feel Godric trying to test the waters. We were all in unchartered territory here; even I didn't know myself right now.

"You can call me Sookie, Godric." Godric's eyes flashed quickly to Eric who looked like a kid on Christmas morning.

"Sookie, then. A lot has come to light while you have been recovering. I think it's time we lay all of our cards out on the table. No matter Fae or vampire secrets. We need to talk and share information like we are a team. I will not have any other members of our family being taken from us."

I didn't realize my hand was gripping the chair so strongly until Eric lightly grazed my hand. I took a deep breath. Godric was right. If I had been upfront about who Claude was and if we had actually taken the time to talk about how Eric wasn't sitting here currently married to the Queen of Oklahoma, maybe Claude would still be alive and I wouldn't have a calligraphy signature currently scabbing up on my stomach.

"Yes. Lets put it all out on the table." I inhaled deeply. "Niall told me the bond was broken. That is what happened to me first."

Eric snarled. "It CANNOT be broken"

"If we are going to get through all of this information, you're really going to need to hold your tongue." I snapped at Eric.

He put his hands up and I continued to share, "When Niall saved me from Neave and Lochlan - "

"HE DID NOT SAVE - "

"ERIC."

We were standing nose to nose now. Electricity or passion pinging between us, I couldn't tell. I wanted to punch him and kiss him at the same time. Eric's gaze was moving between my lips and my eyes. I pushed him away, embarrassed that I couldn't get my emotions in control and was being so disrespectful in front of Godric.

"Eric, if you can't listen to this story I will have to ask you to leave so that Sookie and I can talk."

"I'm sorry, Master. And to you, Sookie. This is harder to hear than I anticipated." He threw himself into a guest chair and lounged back. He pretended to lock his mouth with a key and throw the key away.

After one more eye roll, I started again. "When Niall saved me from those deranged Faeries, he took me to the Fae realm and offered me a fruit that he said would break the bond and set Eric and I free. When I ate the fruit I had almost an internal war with myself, where I seemed to be encountering all of the hardship and trauma that had gone on in my life. It's like in my mind there were barriers blocking me from moving on. When I was able to break all of the barriers, I noticed there was one left, but it was like Niall was able to trick me into leaving that one barrier up. When I think back on it now, I think he actually built the barrier. This barrier was blocking the bond and numbing my emotions. I can't say I blame him, without my stubbornness and human feelings in the way I became ruthless. It was so easy to learn and train when I didn't have my insecurities and emotions making me question my every move. I felt powerful and free, for a while at least."

"So by blocking the bond and your feelings, it's almost like a different facet of your mind took over control." Godric looked deep in thought.

"Yes, exactly. And I think that's where Susannah came from. Or where she is. I'm not quite sure how to talk about a different part of myself as another person. I know now that we are one. The mechanics of it, I may never understand. But I at least can feel my whole self again."

Eric finally spoke up, "You're certainly easier to talk to now, without that harpy in control."

"You just don't like when women sass you," I smiled at him.

"So who was Claude to you, and why was he here at all if Niall only sent you to assist." Godric quickly interrupted the retort Eric was about to give me.

I was quiet for a few moments. Trying to get control of the wave of rage and despair that was taking over my body. I needed to calm down or my hands would start lighting up again. I couldn't let Godric know how out of control I was of my powers.

"Claude is. Claude was my cousin, and the brother to Claudine. He was gay, and would never have been able to satisfy what Niall wanted from his descendants. If you couldn't marry and have more Fae children, you were pretty useless to Niall. The Fae race is dwindling due to sickness and wars amongst the different tribes. Being considered an outcast, Claude was all the more willing to come with me. Looking back now, I think that he was also worried about me. Being devoid of my emotions was causing me a lot of...pain."

Erc was sitting up now, his expression unreadable. "Did Niall know that Claude was here?"

"Niall knows where all of his offspring are at all times and what they are feeling. I assume it's similar to the maker-child connection for Vampires." I shrugged, I wasn't really sure.

"No, Sookie. It is not the same. We could never leave our children to suffer in pain if we could feel them." Godric was looking pointedly at me. I was surprised by his comment, he usually didn't speak his opinion of Niall or his actions in front of me. I could appreciate how candid we were all being in this moment.

"Earlier, when you were talking with Niall you mentioned killing people for him. What exactly did you do for Niall when you were in his court?" Eric didn't sound accusatory, just curious. I should have assumed they would have listened to our conversation.

"As I mentioned, there are several Fae tribes. Niall is only the leader of the Sky clan. Lately, resources in Fae have been dwindling and wars started breaking out as each clan is fighting for what they need to survive. The Sky and Water clans are the two most powerful clans and the closest to gaining full control of all resources. As you both know, sometimes war needs to have more strategic actions taken. An assassination in the middle of the night, or the kidnapping of a powerful Fae from a different clan, a little blackmail here or there. I did whatever he asked of me for the good of my clan." I did what I thought was right at the time and nothing I could do could stop that.

Eric and Godric were looking at each other now, having a silent conversation I didn't care to analyze or try to snoop in their brains to find out. I didn't even know if I had enough control of my telepathy to not melt someone's brain, so I was going to mind my own business for the time being.

"If the Water and Sky clans are at the center of all of this war, the Water clan must be working with Queen Freyda to gain the upper hand." Godric said pensively.

"That would explain why they are working together. What else would they gain from working with an enemy that could eat them at any minute." Eric responded.

"Yes, let's talk about our common enemy now. I want to know what happened here after I left. How is Jason a vampire? What happened to Bill? And how did Eric get out of marrying that bitch?" I sneered.

"Maybe if you hadn't ran off recklessly when you heard about the marriage to Queen Freyda you wouldn't have gotten captured and taken to Fae I would have been able to tell you my plan of getting out of the marriage," Eric yelled at me.

And there it was. After all this time the truth was finally blatantly said out loud. Eric blamed me for everything that had happened. In his mind, by choosing to go to Fae I was the domino that caused all of the events leading to today. Including Claude's death. Was he right? I had spent so much time thinking I just had bad luck, but I was just an irrational emotion driven human. No wonder Niall had taken my emotions away. I felt like throwing up. I couldn't be here anymore in front of them. Feeling so broken and stupid.

"Sookie, wait. NO - " I teleported away before Eric could grab me.

EPOV

"Smooth moves, Eric." Godric said.

I don't think I had ever seen my maker roll his eyes and we had known each other for 1000 years. I put my head down on Godric's desk. Really smooth moves.

"Well are you going to go get her? The raw power crackling off of her was palpable and I certainly hope someone finds her before she hurts some innocent bystander." I sat up as my maker raised his eyebrow at me. "I don't think I have seen you be so reckless in 800 years, Eric."

As I started to apologize he raised his hand up. "I didn't say it was a bad thing. Sometimes it's nice to be a little reckless, to remind us why we are alive." He paused. "But there is a limit to how much impulsivity I can witness, Eric. You are putting us all at risk with her in this state while we are surrounded by enemies we cannot see."

I nodded. Godric was right; Sookie Stackhouse always seemed to have a way of getting underneath my skin. I stood up to start heading in the direction of our blood tie when I felt a sudden flash of pure rage. My fangs shot out in response and I cut my lip. I had never felt such anger, especially in Sookie. This was really bad.

"Be careful, Eric."

I sped out of the room and into the sky. I could feel her in the direction of Bon Temps. Why did everything always seem to happen in that bumfuck nowhere town.

SPOV

When I appeared in the cemetery next to the farmhouse in Bon Temps I was barely holding myself together. I could feel myself trembling, the pain and rage of my life rolling through my muscles. I kept trying to take a deep breath, to recenter myself, to grasp onto something because I felt two seconds away from nuclear meltdown.

I dropped to my knees gasping. My hands on my chest trying to hold the endless emotions inside. I placed my head down on the dirt near my knees, trying to see straight. When I turned my head to the side I saw two gravestones. One for Adele Stackhouse and the other for Jason Stackhouse. A broken sob slipped out of my mouth as I thought about all of the family and friends I had failed over the years. Was I doomed to get close to people who would end up betraying me or dying because of my stupid choices? How could I let another brother get roped into my mess and then die?

I lifted my head up and screamed for Claude. I screamed for my Gran. For Jason. For a simple human life I would never have. Again and again I wailed out. I could feel the Fae spark igniting from my broken heart, to my shoulders and then all the way down to my fingertips. As I wailed again Fae light started shooting out of my hands blowing craters into the ground anywhere I pointed. Is this what bloodlust felt like? I felt ready to murder anything in my path.

I whipped around as I felt Eric land a little ways away from me. I could feel his caution in our bond. He was right to be wary of me; one hit from my light and he might incinerate.

"Sookie," he said quietly as he walked toward me. I could feel him trying to push calm into the bond.

"Don't you fucking do that, Eric. Do not use the bond to control me." I hissed out, my hands lighting up again.

Eric stopped and tilted his head up again, taking a deep breath. I noticed he was tense, his eyes the darkest shade of blue I had ever seen. "Your rage is consuming. I myself am having a hard time not running off and murdering every idiot in this stupid town."

"And you are here to make me feel better?"

"No. I want to help you let it out, before you commit a massacre. You are also not fully healed and are vulnerable out here." He looked pointedly at my stomach.

The scabs of Freya's signature had ripped open and I was bleeding. "If it makes you feel better, you smell amazing." He smirked at me.

I ground my teeth down. Fucking vampires. Fucking Eric.

"My, my Sookie. I've never felt you this angry. Or is this Susannah again? She seemed much more capable of wielding such power." He gestured around to the pits I had blown into the ground.

And then I just stopped trying to contain my feelings. I leaned into the rage and popped in front of Eric. But at 1000 years old, Eric was much faster than me. He dodged to the side as I started throwing light bolts at him. Screaming out as I continued to miss.

"This is as good as it gets for the Fae then?" He continued to goad me. "No wonder you couldn't save Claude."

And then I blacked out.

EPOV

When Sookie's eyes started to glow and I could no longer see her pupils I started to wonder if I had pushed her too far. I didn't know how powerful she could be, or what would even happen to a Fae that went this cataclysmic. I wasn't worried for myself, but more about her using up so much of her power that she would die. Godric was right, this was bad. She was like a newborn vampire succumbing to the mania of bloodlust.

I stopped all contemplation when I saw her start to move. She was teleporting around me at a speed I was having a hard time following. I started to speed toward the woods next to the cemetery hoping the trees would distract her. Suddenly, I was thrown to the ground and my leg felt like it was burning. I hissed loudly, my fangs snapping down at the burning sensation. When I looked at my leg, Sookie's light had wrapped around it like a lasso. And then she started to tighten it. I howled out in pain as my leg started to burn in her sunlight whip. Blood was seeping out of the wound, so I clenched my teeth and threw my leg forward hoping she would lose her balance.

As soon as the light loosened around my leg I was up and moving again. The woods would give her enough things to shoot at without hopefully getting me in the process. I grunted at the pain of putting weight on my leg. It was healing slowly because of its exposure to the sunlight. I heard a popping sound in front of me and she was there again. Her eyes just glowing orbs as she shot balls of energy at me.

When I looked back again I could see tears streaming down her eyes. I stayed in my position too long trying to figure out if she was in physical pain. The bond was a useless haywire mess right now. And then she hit me square in the chest. Within seconds I was gurgling blood and had fallen backwards on the ground. I placed my hand on the chest, feeling something wet and sticky, but my vision was too blurry to confirm that it was my blood.

"Fuck." I closed my eyes as I heard her walking closer to me, not needing to teleport since she incapacitated me. I just left my eyes shut as she stood above me, unsure of what she would do next.

SPOV

The waves of anguish and rage immediately quieted down as soon as I felt Eric's pain in the bond. My vision started to clear and I started to lose my balance. I knelt on the ground before I fell over and put my wrist up to his mouth. I'll

"You stupid idiot. Don't ever do that again." My voice sounded so raw to me. I had released so much energy and pent up emotions in one time I felt like I was about to float out of my body. I looked at the crater in Eric's chest, blood seeping out of the wound. If I had been at full strength I would have killed him.

Eric finally opened his eyes and gave me a look of skepticism. "Did your power's short circuit your brain? You're just offering me your blood?"

"You risked your safety to let me find some semblance of control again. And I injured you. Seems fair." His fangs slid out at my comment.

Eric gently grabbed my wrist and brought it closer to him, sniffing my skin. When he started to lick my wrist slowly I stiffened. "I'm sorry, it's just so intoxicating to be this close to you. Even after you almost killed me."

"Just bite. I don't have the mental capacity to do anymore then help you heal and go to sleep." Again my voice sounded weird. My arms felt numb and I needed time to sort through all of the feelings that had just exploded out of me. There wasn't room in my brain to contemplate anything that had to do with Eric right now.

He licked my wrist one more time and then I felt his fangs slide in. I gasped at the feeling. I didn't expect it to feel so good. Eric kept his eyes on me the whole time. There was always something so mesmerizing about his piercing blue eyes. I licked my lips, wishing he was biting me elsewhere. Remembering what it felt like to feed him in the throes of passion. I took a shaky breath. After I healed and got myself into better control, Eric and I were really going to need to hash it out. Without any Faerie exploding Vampire events of course.

Finally he stopped. The wound had completely closed, but I could tell he only took enough to seal the wound. "Thank you, Sookie." He said quietly as he looked away from me with his eyes closed.

"Is the pain really bad?" Why wouldn't he look at me? I could see his jaw was clenched.

"No."

"Eric, what's wrong." I weakly tried to lean around to get him to look at my face.

"I just need a moment. Your blood is intoxicating and I'm trying not to throw you on the ground and fuck you." His voice sounded strained.

"Maybe after that date?" Eric's head whipped around at my question. I shrugged in response, "I'm joking. Sort of. We have a lot we need to talk about."

"What will I get if I let you blow me up again?" Eric gave me a full grin, his fangs out.

I rolled my eyes. "I don't think I can teleport right now, will you be okay getting somewhere for your days rest?"

"We can just sleep in your home. It's been renovated to be light tight since…" He trailed off.

"Will it be safe during the day time? I don't think I am going to be of much use until I've had some time in the sun." I could barely raise my arm right now. It seemed like my enemies were everywhere now I didn't want to risk Eric's safety while he was dead for the day.

"We will be fine." He slowly got up and looked down at me. I tried several times to get my body to move, but it wouldn't cooperate. Eric looked at me cautiously as he leaned down and swept me up bridal style. He started to walk in the direction of the farmhouse.

"Maybe taking your blood was a mistake," Eric said quietly. I think we were both equally trying to ignore the heat between our bodies as he carried me. A heat that was hanging out in a lower region that would only make our current situation more confusing.

"You were not going to be able to move anytime soon. We had no choice. And I think this is a consequence of me going...supernova." I didn't know what to call it. I had never yielded such power before.

He looked down at me with a pensive look on his face. "What? Something on my face?"

Eric smirked at me, "No. I'm just wondering when life is going to stop fucking you over so I can see you smile again and then fuck you myself."

Eric Northman had such a way with words.