Broken Hallelujah
Jesus wandered along this eternal path, somewhere between the empty tomb and… to the end of when and where time would conclude. He paused a moment as he looked down again in half awe and half disbelief at the pierced hands… and feet that he now possessed. He snickered a bit, gazing past his fingers; at the realization of how silly he must have looked standing there palms up, staring at his own feet.
He remained quite though, still remembering the event now burned into his existence. Something he knew he'd never forget!
Eternity collapsed upon time as the entire history of the cosmos flashed before his… (and His) presence. In an instant that burst from the realm of the everlasting, piercing the darkness as the Spirit populated a dead cosmos with what would become the foundation of life; water.
The two most simple basic atomic elements; hydrogen and oxygen. It was all pure genius and the inevitable injection of God Himself would assail the darkness.
Well I've heard there was a secret chord, that David played and it pleased the Lord;
He realized that he knew in that instant, what that actually "felt" like. Maybe for the first time he realized that he could actually "remember" it? Yet still so many things the mortal mind couldn't quite consciously grasp. The inkling of all his life, that he "knew"; but seemingly couldn't remember how he knew. Yet now he KNEW; (and he knew that he knew)!
Memories floated through his conscious. If ever the faces of his Father and the Spirit could have materialized before him, as he peered out of the receding death shroud at the two angels peering back. They'd come to hold this wailing flesh that felt like a lightning bolt piercing through the degradation of a hopelessly corrupted creation.
Like Adam had been, he was hot, conscious and aware of Who he was looking at. Unlike Adam though; he reached out in recognition to embrace Them. For also, unlike Adam's person; he was also part of Them! And maybe in that moment, he remembered the unity wherewith they'd all permeated each other's presence long prior to "time". If it were ever possible for eternity to become one flesh in time; that was the closest he'd imagined he'd ever get while on earth. He hugged Them, as if he would never have to let go!
And the experience of being raised still lit his flesh upon the fire of the Divine breath of life itself. How'd… we? get.. stuffed into mortality. He snickered to himself as he wrapped those earthy arms around this mortal flesh now living again. He paused to pay conscious mind to his own heartbeat and the life blood that flowed to feed him once again.
He longed to both laugh and cry with the mighty power of what it meant to be Divine to begin with. Alas though, the plan had to wait upon such glory; for this cosmos would not be able to contain Him, if He'd not the long-suffering of boundless love.
The whole odyssey was so overwhelming that he found himself crumpled upon the ground again. Almost as if, what would it be like to give birth? He as the creature though, was the one on the… receiving end and the whole ordeal left him breathlessly wanting to wail some more.
The intensity was subsiding though, and all that of life, and the material elements that made it all work, seemed to be seeping out of his eyes more than the rest of him. What a fearfully and wonderfully made being he was. He sucked in a deep breath, trying to control the giggles as he collected himself back together.
Somewhere though, it still seemed some of him was left back in eternity. Almost as if he could just stand up, peer through and step across that great divide. He longed to take this mortal flesh and present it in all of its complicated wonder to his Father in heaven. Yet he knew the answer to that was: "Yes Jesus, but you still need to wait."
He sat up again and stared into heaven with his open arms raised, just as if he almost expected to be plucked up from the earth. He cried and laughed, his face got all warm and he started to sweat again. He bowed over and rested his ear on the cold damp earth; almost as if he could hear the planet commune with him. From the dust that Adam was made; that You'd prepared a body for me. He let out a sigh, rested for a bit, until he felt comforted enough to stand up and keep moving.
It is all different now. He observed as he rose from among the waving blades of grass and looked around. All power and authority now had been relinquished to his control. He knew that's what was now different. He stood quietly to contemplate this authority a moment; as if in this odd space between time and eternity, almost like he didn't know what to do next?
Of course that was a silly notion. He knew what he was going to do next. After all, it was all part of the plan mapped out in eternity; that he Himself had collaborated on. He chuckled in the silly finite temporal moment of simple human joy. He knew the next souls he would meet would be a group of women. After of course he'd told Mary not to touch him.
And of course after telling Herod that as the Son of God; Christ himself would be perfected on the 3rd day. When Herod the wanna-be King of the Jews suffered such… performance anxiety that he could not even manage the mortal act of producing an heir. Too much "soft apparel" and those whom to engage in said acts of perversion.
"But Father, I'm certainly ready!" He burst out in snickers among… the Three of Them. Trinity inside jokes; he pondered.
But you don't really care for music, do ya?
Of the eternal compulsion to be fruitful and multiply that his mortality carried tightly wrapped in the hands of Him who'd contained and protected him for the entirety of his life.
Mary, as much as I know you are happy to see me and want to hug me; just…. don't. (Not right now at least.) Father, You need to help me out here. Because all I long to do right now, is run to You and hide in that space where I have no need to keep anything within my soul.
He thought of Mary a moment and all the generosity of material wealth she'd loved his Father's children with. Down in his soul, he really did want to hug her too; and tell her that he was both happy to see her, as well as express his gratitude to the Father's provision for her and all she'd blessed with the basic necessities mammon did purchase.
He thought of the cloak she, Salome, James and John's mother Mary and even Martha had bought him. Now passed on to a Roman soldier, who was even at this moment staring at it, contemplating the resurrected one who once wore it. It had kept Jesus warm, dry and on many occasions its sleeves even served to hold his blood, sweat, tears… snot….and... Even swaddled shivering moms and children complete with all leaky breasts, bladders and baby bowels!
Jesus began to giggle again. The ladies had chosen wisely; for this cloak always washed up and wore well! The visceral (and messy) fluidity of all that made life function. Jesus lent his reflections of gratitude to his Father.
How ironic it is, that even God's own private moments could embarrass himself in the presence of mere mortals? Well, Jesus you are indeed still 'mortal' to them! He snickered some more. For reality remained, that too intimate of familiarity would get complicated to extract himself from. After all he knew he was still human; in all that he / Himself had designed that to encompass! Not that in this reality, had he ever been ashamed before the presence of both his Father and the Holy Spirit; despite the fact that humanity nearly almost never understood him. Sinners were bound to not comprehend… Them either.
A mystery his own earthy existence wasn't even sure of himself. He giggled again.
Well it goes like this; the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift!
Jesus sucked in another breath and continued to walk, as his mind brought into remembrance everything that he'd witnessed that morning. The terrified soldiers ambiguity as to whether or not one of the fellows that was walking away from them, now wrapped in the other's cloak, was indeed the one who'd come out of that empty tomb.
Cephas, his fellow… (resurrected of intellectual enlightenment at least); kept peering behind them at the befuddled troop who were too terrified to investigate those wandering off.
"Go find out." the head of the guard nudged a motionless frozen soldier. But none of humanity bore the right of standing, to inquire.
As for Cephas though, atonement in the stead of sheer grit, had initiated his 'opening of the case' so to speak. And he still bore the glow of glory for his anticipated investigation of the happenings of his family's charge of these sacred burial grounds. They fear he will rise from the dead! But what officer of the law, even of a conventional disappearance, doesn't wish to find a live person at the end of the road; when the file finally compiled in storage says 'Closed Case'?
No doubt he was dead though. As Jesus had actually watched Cephas's contemplations from heaven. Thank You Father. He repeated.
The angel returned of the simple offering of this young lad anxiously awaiting first glance of the resurrected one. And here he emerged, a barefoot sweaty, stringy blood dried and soaked hair, wet mess, freshly birthed from death itself.
Wow, what an ordeal! Jesus could feel Cephas's consternation of both compassion and relief as he hurried over to assist, not really sure why Christ raised from the dead was wobbling toward him, sucking in deep breaths. Yet there Jesus stood, in all his vulnerable nakedness wrapped in the cloak the lad had just offered to the angel.
Quite the contrast of God's glory wrapped in human flesh.
Despite Jesus's mix of emotional overwhelm and intense physical excitement; Cephas gladly accepted him in all the tearful laughing mess he was. Jesus held himself together long enough to catch his breath when emerged a primal cry of victory and he took off half running and dancing through the cemetery.
Oh death, where is thy sting? Oh grave, where is thy victory?
The baffled king composing Hallelujahs!
Jesus was well fed and cared for by a stunned and astonished family. Their curious and compassionate son had brought home many a stray dog, hungry cat and injured lamb; but never had they ever dreamed (or imagined) that he'd bring them their resurrected Messiah! They were confounded unto near and utter silence.
Yet when Jesus returned contentedly clean, dressed and fed to the tomb; only to find faithless Mary crying? A part of him really wanted to burst out laughing; although not at Mary's calamity, but simply at the sheer pleasure of being able to announce that he was back…. from the dead!
The pure joy of the rush of the victory of life that flooded his soul; set this flesh alight all over again.
OK Father! Yes, I will be happy to return to glory. And though I'm overjoyed to announce victory and an end to the power of death; the affects of being raised are proving to be confounding even despite all the facets of complexity this comfort offers. Admittedly, it's not something I care to share with anyone but You!
And… yes, I now see the practicality of the wisdom of waiting till I return to You before the Spirit cleaves unto them! That's much more complication than I even care to ponder at this moment.
Jesus tried not to giggle as he sucked in a deep breath and deliberated upon greeting Mary.
All authority granted in heaven and upon earth, did prove to be useful in maintaining appropriate degrees of separation; despite that Jesus really did want to hug all his human lovies and even to the same yearning as his soul ached to embrace his Father.
On the other side of eternity though; he… (He) knew He could cleave unto all, of all His heart's content for ever and ever; as there will be no… complications of the flesh in the incorruptible recreated cosmos!
Hallelujah! Jesus cried. Hallelujah!
Even if in this life; it comes out as a.. broken hallelujah. He whined a bit more, as he noticed the women providence had appointed unto him in this very human time, began to recognize him.
"Lord, is that really…. y..y.. You?" Salome gasped wide eyed as she scurried over to him. He reached out and took her by the hand before she'd had the chance to embrace him.
The remainder hurried to follow, as he reached out to greet eager hands who all wished to examine him. He both laughed and cried, as he led this brood of mother hens to a place where he could actually sit down; while they satisfied their need to confirm that this was indeed Christ raised from the dead.
He was a bit amazed, as they all seemed rather delighted that their abundant affection set him to the point of giggling so heartily that tears poured down his face.
"Yes, this is him; the Christ; he has bodily raised and is certainly alive." Martha announced. "Ghosts don't blush!"
Hallelujah!