Again, I am not a psychologist, I tried to do some research but don't take what I wrote as fact, it might be wrong - don't take these as advices
Armin and Eren are driving home, chatting a but about their situations, Eren listening to Armin about his job -"I mean I like the job. It pays well, so that's a big plus. They keep pushing for overtime but you can opt out of it, they don't force it on anyone" Armin starts speaking, looking out the window.
"I feel like there is a but coming on" Eren interrupts, stopping at red light. Armin chuckles a bit, shaking his head -"But" he starts, emphasising the word -"the people are just awful. And I mean awful" he pauses, Eren knowing that Armin wouldn't call anyone that without them deserving worse.
Eren parks his car in front of his house, turning off the engine -"So what are you going to do? You're going to stay there for long or what?" the blonde grimaces, getting out of the car -" Don't know. The money is good enough, and that is a big reason I took it - if I stick there for a few more months I am going to get more experience, so that I can seek out more stuff"
The duo enters Eren's house, Carla greeting them from the couch, looking at their TV -"Hey Armin! Nice to see you! How are you doing?" she asks, getting up to hug her son's friend. Armin reciprocates the gesture, stepping back a bit -" All good Mrs Jeager. How are you?"
"I'm fine! So Eren tells me yhat you've started a new job - how are you finding it so far?" Carla asks, heading to the kitchen -" You want anything?" the blonde follows her, Eren behind him -" A glass of water, if I can!" at that, the brunette acts, grabbing the bottle of water and filling up a glass, handing it to his friend.
"The job is good. Not perfect, but it pays well, and that's my first priority right now" Armin answers, Carla nodding at the boy, understanding his comment -"Yeah I get it. If the money is good, right?" she then turns towards Eren, her expression turning serious -"How was Mikasa?"
Eren's shoulders slouch a bit, taking a deep breath before answering -"She was actually better - we talked a bit, generally we had fun!" At that, Carla raises her eyebrows, surprised by that answer. Before she can ask for more details, Eren starts to talk again, providing more information.
"She started reading the Lord of the Rings, we watched a few scenes. She actually commented on Levi's cleaning standards!" he exclaims, his happiness leaking from the tone. Carla's smile widens, relieved that the girl is getting better, but noticing Eren's posture changing, signalling a mood shift.
"Then we called Sasha...she was so happy to see Mik...but then she complimented her looks..." Eren pauses, the reason behind the raven's behaviour still pushing on him. Carla looks at him, expecting him to keep talking, when Armin takes over, knowing his friend must be deep in thought.
"Basically the compliments remind her of her...uuh" Armin stops, not sure on how to refer to Mikasa's previous situation -"well what happened to her. So she froze for a few seconds, I could tell that she was beginning to hyperventilate - but then Levi took over, and calmed her down"
The trio sighs, Eren frowning thinking back to that moment - I didn't even notice...
"Honestly I'm surprised at how Levi handled it. He worked hard on himself to change" the blonde comments,having witnessed to the behavioural shift of the older brother during the previous years, subtlety eyeing Eren, also knowing that the brunette has to do the same journey still.
"I know, right? The Levi from years ago is words away from current Levi - I'm happy that he managed to grow as a person" Carla adds, looking at Eren, a weird expression on his face -"Are you ok, Eren?"
The brunette shakes his head, his thought process interrupted by the question -" Yeah...yeah...I was just thinking that...I didn't even notice Mikasa closing up - I was so happy that she participated that I completely ignored any signals..."
He sits down, leaning on the table with his elbow, one hand rubbing his eyes -"I messed up again..."
For a while, there is silence, Eren still covering his eyes, until he feels someone holding tha other hand, making him look up,meeting his mother's eyes -"You didn't mess up, Eren - you were happy, and you didn't see what happened. That's all. Don't put yourself into any higher standards than the rest of us only because you and Mikasa were close" Eren blushes a bit at that last part, Armin softly giggling at the sight, increasing the blush even more.
"You're not going to catch on to every single bad thought that she has. Help her by being there when those thoughts get the better of her" she finishes, staring straight at the brunette, making sure he understands her point.
Eren exhales deeply, still not 100% agreeing with what his mother said but understanding the logic
behind it -" I'll try...thanks", he says, smiling at Carla, who returnes the gesture -" No problem! Now, Armin, are you going to stay for dinner?"
"No thanks Mrs Jeager - I'm going to go home, my parents already had planned something - thanks anyway though!" Armin cordially replies. Eren stands up, opening the door for the stairs, waving the blonde to go with him. They enter his room, Armin already making himself comfortable on his bed -"Man your bed is the most comfy mattress I've ever experienced...can I buy it from you?" he asks, making Eren chuckle from the statement.
"Don't think so - I like it too, you know" he replies, taking a seat next to him. The brunette inhales deeply, and then turns towards his friend, a serious look on his face -" Hey Armin...I never thanked you for sticking with me all these years...I know I wasn't exactly the best friend...or person to be around..."
Armin raises one eyebrow, surprised by the conversation taking that turn -"Well...we were friends, and you needed one. No problem. You would've done the same if it had been me"
"Yeah, sure...but...I'm thinking back to how I acted...I was just so defeated...I'm pretty sure I got worse the more time passed..." Eren thinks back, wishing that he could somehow go back in time and fix himself.
"That doesn't matter now - you were depressed for Mikasa,and that depression turned to resentment. But now you're getting better. You are better. The same way Levi is in a better place now, you will be there too. And we'll be there with you!"
The brunette nods, the words of his friends lifting his doubts of their view on the friendship they shared, convinced once again that he didn't burn any bridge.
"Thanks, Armin" he says softly, letting silence take over, the duo not bothered by its presence. Eren eyes Armin, smirking, remembering his moment of embarrassment with his mother, deciding to pay Armin back in kind -" So Armin...you did say that you met this girl, right? What was her name again?"
Armin perks up, obviously eager to answer his friend -" Annie! And you remember? I only mentioned it once in passing! And yeah, I'm planning to ask her out - I can't wait for you two to meet!"
The brunette stares at his friend, kind of disappointed that his plan failed tremendously, but still happy for his friend, noticeably nodding at the blonde, still talking about Annie.
He thinks back to Mikasa, a smile coming to his face, thinking of when they'll be able to spend as much time together as they did.
Soon enough hopefully...
Mikasa wakes up, the alarm snatching her from her sleep with its incessant beeping. She stretches her arms, quietly yawning, and she gets off the bed, making her way to the door, exiting the room. She looks at the opened sofa bed, Petra still sleeping in it, the woman's soft breathing letting her know she was still in deep sleep.
Mikasa goes to the bathroom, seeing on top of a small cabinet a new change of clothes, courtesy of Petra - the raven didn't have any, for the time being using the red head's clothes, grateful for the help.
She rinses her face, washing the sleepiness away, and gets dressed, neatly folding her pajamas in the appropriate compartment with the others.
As she exits the bathroom, she can hear noises coming from the kitchen, and she follows them, finding Levi cooking breakfast for all of them, the table already set up with cups of tea for everyone. The man turns, and smiles, seeing his sister awake -" Hey Mik! Have you slept well?"
The raven nods, sitting down at the table, inhaling the sweet scent of the beverage in front of her -"Yes...are you sure you still want to sleep in the sofa bed? It can't be comfortable" she tentatively asks, knowing that the mattress is inherently better.
Levi sits down, his expression turning neutral, before looking at the girl -" Don't worry about us - as long as you're ok, that's all that matters" he answers, softly smiling at Mikasa, who still looks uncertain -"But...it must be awful...tonight we'll switch...I don't want you not being comfortable for me" Mikasa softly states, Levi at first surprised that she is effectively taking action, smiling widely at her, before shaking his head softly.
"Mik. It's not that..." he sighs, not sure how to approach the issue, deciding to be open about it, hoping it won't cause problems -"Are you ok with not sleeping in a closed room? Hange told me that you might feel scared without a physical confined room...and it's ok if you still aren't fully sure about it. There is no problem - trust me"
Mikasa thinks about it, picturing sleeping in the open livingroom, Levi and Petra sleeping in another closed room, feeling a rising sense of anxiety. She scrunches her eyes, sensing fear rising through her, opening her eyes when a hand softly grabs her own, the thumb rubbing the palm, looking up to Levi.
"Don't worry about it - there is no problem for us. As long as you get better, there is no problem" he says softly, locking eyes with her, not letting go of the hand unt she nods. She tries to sneakily wipe some tears away from her eyes, Levi noticing the motion immediately, but not saying anything. Instead he stands up, grabbing a box of cereals from a cabinet, putting it on the table, near Petra's spot.
"I don't know how she manages to eat this sugar coated stuff" he quietly whispers, feeling happiness at the barely present smile on Mikasa's face. They both turn their heads at the sounds of footsteps approaching, seeing Petra coming to the kitchen as well, wearing a sleepy smile -" Hey you two - have you slept well Mik?" she sits down, bringing the cup of tea up to her mouth, taking a small sip.
"Yes, thanks - I hope that you had the same" The raven replies, starting to have breakfast as well. Petra shrugs her shoulders, putting down the cup -" I've had better, but no complaints tonight - even if Levi kept kicking me with his leg" she comments, shooting a dirty glare towards him.
Levi doesn't reply, merely glaring at the red head, one arm behind the chair, his legs crossed, and holding the tea cup by the edge, making Mikasa chuckle at the display, one of the rare moments where the girl can just relax and have fun, forgetting about her past. She stands up, putting the tea cup in the sink, turning towards the duo
-" Can I take a shower?" Mikasa asks politely.
"You don't need to ask, Mik - go ahead" Levi replies, feeling a bit discouraged by the girl's constant need for permission, managing to hide it from Mikasa. They both wait to hear the closing of the door, Petra grabbing Levi's hand, softly squeezing it -" She'll get there...give her time"
The man softly nods, squeezing back her hand, staying in comfortable silence for a while.
They each finish their drinks, occasionally bumping their feet against the other's leg, all while smirking, trying desperately to remain serious, and failing.
Levi sighs, knowing he has to bring up a delicate issue, looking up to Petra before speaking -"For how long are we going to stay in this place?"
The question leaves the red head a bit shocked, not seeing that coming up from anywhere. She furrows her eyebrows, a confused look on her face -"Why that all of a sudden?"
"Well...we can't stay in this situation for long - even if the sofa bed was comfortable, which it isn't, this place is a bit too small for three people - it was barely big enough for us" he explains, mulling over almost every possibility he can think of, the biggest one also the one he's most uncertain.
Petra nods, knowing what Levi must be thinking.
"It could be a good thing - also, we would be staying at a much bigger place. More space for everyone" she starts, deciding to cut down the useless questions about where they could go.
Levi gulps down nothing, not disagreeing with what she said it also not agreeing with it fully -"It could also be a mistake...she hasn't been to that place...well you know" he pauses, making sure that the noise of the shower is still coming in.
"But you're right - we need the extra space...maybe we can just bring her today, or tomorrow, see how she reacts..." Levi says, pinching the bridge of his nose -" I'm going to call Hange...see what they say"
"Hey...it might be difficult for her...in fact, cancel that might - it is going to be difficult for her...see what Hange says on this one. I'll be right behind you whatever you choose"
Levi nods, grabbing his phone and swiping swiping contact list until he lands on Hange Zöe,and initiates the call.
"Hey Levi! How are you? Is everything ok with Mikasa?"
"Hello Hange...yes, Mikasa has improved tremendously, I'll never stop being grateful for your help - I'm actually calling for advice. The place where we are right now is small...and we do need to have more space for everyone. We...we were thinking of going back to our parents' house. But we're not sure on how Mikasa is going to react"
The line stays silent for a few seconds, evidently Hange being deep in thought, then it becomes alive again.
"Well, she is probably going to experience ptsd - reintroducing the victims to the place of trauma can help, if done correctly - but I'd also like to hear what you would feel like, going back to that place"
Levi doesn't expect the question, the thought not even having crossed his head, not answering for the first couple of seconds.
"W-what do you mean?"
"Well, Levi...that place could be traumatic also for you - not in the same way as Mikasa, but similar. Have you been back to that place ever since?"
"Yes...I'll admit I was avoiding the house at first...but after a few years, I started going again, mainly to clean, like once every week, or two weeks if I'm busy with something else - only for an hour, two hours tops"
"Oh! I'm going to be honest, I was not expecting that answer! But anyway, my point still stands - you haven't been to that place for long periods of time. And I imagine that you managed to use the cleaning as a distraction from the event" Hange explains, Levi nodding softly, seeing Hange's point.
"So what do you suggest?"
"Well - take it one small step at a time. Maybe first just drive in front of the place, then you can stop at the front door. Then enter the place, and finally stay there for a while. But don't do all of this at once - Mikasa is a strong girl, but don't make her stay there for longer than she feels comfortable with -and it's also important that you don't feel obligated to stay there either. Don't push yourselves too much"
"Ok. Thanks - now we'll talk about it with her...maybe we will take Eren and Carla with us as well...have more people around us"
"That can be good, just don't have more people than necessary, ok?" Hange finishes, Levi sighing deeply again, before replying to them.
"Yes...thanks again, Hange - we'll update you as soon as we can"
The phone call ends, Levi sitting down again at the table, not looking forward to have this talk with Mikasa, knowing that it will surely worsen her mood. The bathroom door opens, causing him to sigh deeply, before standing up, Petra at his side.
"Mik?Sorry, could you come here for a second?" he calls out, trying to avoid "We need to talk", imagining that it will only increase her stress. The raven peeks her head from the hallway, the vagueness of the question bringing her pause, but nonetheless trusting Levi that he isn't going to trick her.
"Here's the thing, Mik - this place is becoming a bit too small for all of us. We were thinking of...of using our parents' house" Levi says, deciding to be straight to the point instead of dancing around it.
Mikasa's eyes widen, the memory of her old house coming at her all at once, and with it, flashes on that morning, and she immediately tears up, her breathing getting heavier and faster.
"We're not going there now! Don't worry! We're not going there now - but we need a bigger space, Mik" Levi speaks again, speaking quietly and softly, making Mikasa sit down on a chair and rubbing her back -"We were thinking of even just driving past there...we don't even need to stop the car, if you want. But...unfortunately it's a thing that we need to do, Mik - we'll even bring Eren and Carla" he continues, seeing his sister still on the verge of a panic attack, and he sighs softly.
"I'm scared too, Mik" he admits, which shocks the raven, her eyes staring at Levi, who looks back at her -" You're not alone...I'm afraid too"
The trio stays silent for a while, no-one knowing what to say to ease the nerves, letting the silence instead conquer the place.
Mikasa thinks at what Levi said, his admission making her understand that at least in this issue, she isn't alone in feeling stressed, lifting somewhat her spirit, having someone else that truly understands her feelings, even if only marginally.
After a while, Mikasa gulps down air, managing to calm herself down, and looks at Levi, her expression more downcast than what her brother would want -"Ok"
Levi grabs her hand, softly squeezing it -" Don't worry, Mik - it will be hard, but worth it"