Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the apartment, just the DVDs. There's no profit except writing practice being made here.
Warning: Talk of sex and protection.
P.S.A: Protection is a good thing, not just for preventing pregnancy, but for STIs as well.
"Weird question," Chandler announced as he examined the list Monica had written of what to pack for their trip. Ross had sprung a convention on them that could happily double as a nice weekend away and the pair of them needed to pack for it. They had a bit of time and went on trips like this often enough that the two of them knew what they needed to fold into their shared suitcase so well that they probably didn't need the list, but Monica had written one up with little sketched squares beside each item so she could check things off as she went.
"Hit me." Monica placed the rolled-up formal dress in the bag she had open at the foot of the bed.
Chandler sat down at the head of the mattress, watching her. Both feet were dangling from the bed, one out to the side and the other folded in front of him. Monica picked up the next piece of folded clothing from the bed, preparing to roll it up into their luggage.
"Where are we at on going back to condoms?"
Monica blinked.
It wasn't that she'd completely forgotten about protection, you don't forget about something as essential as that very easily. But she had gotten very used to not having to worry about fumbling in the dark, disposing of it neatly, hoping nobody caught a glimpse inside the fold of Chandler's wallet - particularly not Joey who would realise just how insatiable they were - carrying around her diaphragm in her purse in case one of them got the itch. It had been very easy to stop worrying about all that once they decided they would start trying for a baby. None of that was a hassle or a deterrent, unwrapping the foil to reveal the roll of rubber barely even slowing them down. What it was, was nice to not have to purchase the things - condoms ran up quite a bill. And while diaphragms were much more cost-effective, they were much less reliable, so the pair of them tried to stay clear of them as much as possible. Even at their age, with their experience and their marital status, it was still awkward and embarrassing to buy them, especially if Phoebe walked into the drugstore and spotted them.
"What?" She smiled at her husband.
"Where do we stand on needing protection?" he rephrased. Chandler flicked the list he held in his hand, the paper cracking loudly. "It's just, there's nothing about it on your list and I know we haven't talked about it yet."
Monica wasn't totally following what her husband was saying.
"I don't particularly have a preference, whatever you prefer works for me. I don't mind wearing them if you want to go back to condoms."
Monica furrowed her brows and dropped the fabric in her hands on top of the near rows of clothes already in the bag.
She honestly hadn't thought about it. With the new information they'd recently received about their infertile statuses, Monica supposed they probably didn't need to use protection anymore. Not when both of them had issues and procreation wasn't a worry. And it wasn't like they were not exclusive, they were.
Monica stepped away from the bed, walking around its corner towards Chandler. His eyes bore into her as she moved and Monica thrilled at the realisation. After all this time, after everything they'd learned recently, it was a good sign that he still looked at her in the soft, lusty way that he always had. Monica had read enough magazines to know that the sort of news she and Chandler had just received often broke couples, but she also knew that she and her husband talked about everything. Chandler had a head for numbers and worked analysing things, but was also good at coming up with creative ways to solve and perceive problems. Meanwhile, Monica liked organising and planning and meticulously covering all her bases. If they had a problem, they'd work it out, together.
She watched as Chandler moved to face her fully as she came to stand in front of him, planting both of his feet on the floor. his sky blue bowling shirt was gorgeous on him, making his skin appear golden and his eyes as dark a blue as his hair was brown. His jeans were tight around his thighs and Monica tried not to let her eyes flick downward, but they did. His legs were lithe and strong and rounded with subtle muscle and Monica stepped between them.
Chandler's legs didn't tighten on either side of her and Monica was a little disappointed that he didn't wrap himself around her like she wanted him to. Monica stepped forward and reached her hands around his neck, stroking the bare skin beneath the curls at the end of his dark hair, leaning slightly backwards so her arms were locked and she was hanging off her husband's neck. Standing at the apex of his thighs, Monica's spine tingled with desire, a pulse in her lower belly spiking with interest while she tried to focus on letting him know what she was thinking.
"Do we need to go back?"
Chandler blinked, his hands reaching for her waist and holding her steady to him.
"I mean, we get tested when we go for checkups and it's not likely that I'll get pregnant, why waste all that money?"
Chandler squinted at her. She knew that look and tugged at the ends of his hair to get his attention. He was wondering how he could cheer her up about everything that was going on, studying her face for any cracks in what he thought might be a facade. But the truth was, as much as it hurt that she couldn't carry a child herself, she was excited about this decision they had made. Both of them had grown up feeling unloved by their biological parents, ignored and neglected, a burden instead of a gift. Monica thought it was poetic that they'd be pulling a child out of that life and enduring that it always felt valuable and worth the trouble. The two of them were going to be the opposite of their own parents and openly love their child.
Monica did worry that it wouldn't be enough for Chandler. Her husband had always expressed his desire for a large family with her, four children, he wanted. And Monica didn't think that would ever happen because of how expensive adoption looked like it was going to be. And that was just to get their name on a list, after that, it was a long waiting game of hoping they'd be picked with the chance they never would be. Monica wanted to give him everything he desired from life, childbearing was such a simple task, accidental sometimes, for other women, and Monica had promised to always make him happy and she wasn't upholding her end of the bargain. In the back of her mind, she worried that she had failed him, no matter how many times Chandler insisted that wasn't the case. She'd talk to him about her fears soon, but they'd made a pact and she was going to honour his wishes.
"See," Chandler stroked his large hands up the sides of her ribcage, holding either side of her chest delicately. "Doctor Connelly did say it wasn't totally out of the realm of possibility. So if you wanted to make sure, keep trying," he trailed off.
That's right. She pressed the pads of her fingers lightly into the back of Chandler's neck. There was a chance, small as it was, that they could conceive naturally and Monica knew how often the two of them jumped each other, the chances were probably a little higher than what they'd been told. Although she didn't want to get her hopes up about it.
And then she was struck with a thought and took a half-step backwards, studying her husband's features. It was silly and completely untrue, but it popped into her mind anyway.
Did he want to go back to using protection?
Monica didn't ask the question. She knew her husband, knew he had an honest streak wider than a mile. If he was feeling something, especially something emotional or something concerning her, he would - whether accidentally or on purpose - spill the truth from his lips with his arms outstretched like he was completely open. All she had to do was wait.
"Now, I know we're taking the month off, especially this trip, no talking about all the paperwork and all that," he started and Monica grinned, he was so predictable. She hummed in response, leaning her body towards him, curling her fingers into his hair to pull her body closer to his. "But I think we need to think about this."
"Okay." She waited for him to continue.
His Adam's apple bobbed. His palms caressed the ball of her shoulders, stroking the top of her arms.
"He said it was unlikely, but not that it was impossible for us to conceive naturally," Chandler explained. "And I know the adoption process could take a while, years even, but what happens if we get picked and you're pregnant at the same time, or just after? We haven't budgeted for two children needing diapers at the same time, or two lots of school fees, or more than one college fund. Two toddlers at the same time could be a lot to handle."
Monica felt her smile growing. What was she worrying about? Chandler's fear wasn't having children or not being able to handle being a parent, he was ready for that. Chandler was already such a father, a good one too; he already adored the children they would have and worried about being able to afford a comfortable lifestyle and paying for private education.
Monica tugged at the ends of her husband's hair, his nose poking into her cheekbone. "I remember another handsome doctor telling me that whatever surprises come our way it doesn't matter."
"Another?" He mouthed, thinking over the implication and Monica rolled her eyes, knowing the joke that was coming. "Wait," her husband leant backwards, his hands circling her wrists and a serious expression crossing his face. "You think Doctor Connelly is handsome?"
Chandler walked into the living room and Monica craned her head up to capture his lips as he leant down to greet her.
"Hi," he whispered as his lips left hers. Then her husband smoothed the silly tie the twins had bought him at a Father's Day stall held by their school down his chest and knelt at her feet, laying a hand on her stomach. His palm stroked over the life growing in her belly, resting against her shirt where their baby's foot kicked him in greeting. "And hello to you."
His thumb stroked the fabric of her shirt and he kissed the bump. Monica ran her hand over his hair, loving the way he talked to the round of her stomach like their baby was already listening and responding. He was obsessed with making as many memories with her baby bump as possible, given the chances of it ever happening again, and Monica relished in the amount of attention he paid to her body and their baby, interested in every change and milestone.
Monica brushed her fingers through his hair, bringing his blue eyes to her. Chandler moved his hand to the middle of her stomach and rested his chin on top of it. Their baby kicked against where his hand was and Monica laughed as Chandler's eyes widened in surprised wonder and then kissed the spot beneath his hand before returning to look at her as though nothing had happened.
"Where are the munchkins?" He asked.
"They heard you pull up and have started hiding," she explained. Jack had squealed in delight, announcing that he'd heard a rumble in the driveway and he'd jumped up from where he was doing a dinosaur dot-to-dot at the coffee table to let his sister know they were going to initiate a game of hide-and-seek and should use this time before their dad walked in to find really good hiding spots.
"A-ha," he grinned, standing up easily, rubbing his hands together and looking out at the rest of the house, his eyes falling to the staircase. "Dad's got to work for his hugs tonight." He dropped his gaze to Monica. "Do you think Erica's going to pick the pantry again?"
Monica smiled. The last time they had played, Erica had pulled the door of the pantry mostly closed behind her and tried to alphabetise Monica's herb rack as she hid, changing it from the efficient most used to least used organisational system Monica preferred. Erica had done a pretty good job too and Chandler had laughed proudly that she was her mother's daughter while Monica had picked her up and hugged her tightly and refused to change Erica's system even though the Chilli Flakes weren't next to the Hot Chilli Flakes.
"Need anything before I chase after them?" Monica shook her head, grateful that her husband offered. She told him she was fine.
Chandler very quickly became preoccupied with talking to himself as he scanned the house for any clue to where his children may have hidden, already mumbling to himself about how he could methodically search the house for the twins.
"Honey," she reached up to touch his wrist, calling his attention to her. "it sounded like they wanted to play for a while," she warned him. She knew how the three of them got when they were playing, losing track of time until their stomachs growled and she called them in for dinner. "You might want to change."
He had a tendency for wrinkling his suits and getting finger paint on his ties because he got so excited to spend time with his children.
He grinned lasciviously. "I thought you liked me in a suit and tie?"
"I do," Monica admitted lowly, rubbing her belly. "Isn't that how we got this one?"
He hummed and pressed another kiss to her lips before skipping off to find his children. Monica's eyes followed him out of the room, she was infinitely glad the doctors had been wrong and she and Chandler had never stopped trying to have a baby themselves. Their twins were wonderful gifts, and they loved them dearly, this new baby wasn't going to change that or be more important to them. All their children were fought for; Jack was the boy their gift, Erica was a surprise and a blessing, and their new baby was a miracle.