*Crawls out of the ground* "I Live!" seriously thought sorry its taken me 7 months to update, I promise I haven't forgotten about this fic. Thanks to anyone who has reviewed or favorited it so far, the feedback really keeps me going. This isn't very long but it's something, enjoy!
"So Ziva, your character walks down the corridor. It's narrow and dusty with suit of armor lining the walls and cobwebs in the corner."
"Hey, it sounds like Abby's hou- OW"
Tim glared at Tony as he rubbed his ribs, "You done?"
"She's the one who elbowed me!" Tony protested.
"Both of you behave," Ziva said, "Go on Tim."
"Right," Tim said turning back to his notes, "Ziva do you want to do anything, or do you want to just keep walking?"
"Don't keep walking Ziva!" Abby said, "Roll for perception."
"Abby she's supposed to make her own choices."
"I choose to roll for perception," Ziva said, winking at Abby. She grabbed the dice and threw them down. Tony hissed.
"So a 1 is bad I take it?"
"Your character is so bad at perceiving that they forget they're in a house," Tim deadpanned.
"Great."
"You walk forward, footsteps causing the floorboards to creak. Lighting flashes outside, and suddenly through the wall burst-" Time slammed three figurines on the table, "Giant centipedes!"
"And this is why you never split up," Jimmy groaned, "We're all going to die."
"Calm down Palmer, Ziva's got this."
"Ziva because you got a nat 1 the Centipedes get to go first."
"Palmer forget what I said, we're screwed."
Ziva glared at him, "I won't be beaten by some bugs Tony."
"Don't be so sure Ziva," Time said rolling the dice. What followed was a few rounds of frantic dice rolls and lots of shouting and Tony definitely wasn't getting drawn into this game. Not at all. He also definitely didn't leap up and cheer with the other when Ziva finally killed one of the centipedes. Nope.
"And the centipede misses," Tim said, "Ziva it's your turn."
Ziva frowned at her sheet. She had managed to damage the two other centipedes, but her health was also half gone.
"Call for help!" Abby suggested, "Maybe one of our characters is close enough!"
Ziva looked at Tim, "Am I allowed to do that?"
Tim nodded. "Just roll for... Persuasion I guess?"
"16."
"Perfect, Abby your character is closest. Do you want to help her?"
"Yep!"
"Ok it's going to take a few turns for Abby to get there, so you just have to hold them off."
"I can do that."
Ziva managed it but barely. Tony breathed a sigh of relief when Abby's character finally came into the room and started blasting the bugs with fireballs.
"18," Abby said.
"And with one final hit, the last centipede collapses to the ground." Tim said, "It's still on fire though so you might want to put that out before the house burns down."
"Nah that's just our dinner," Abby joked.
"I mean you could eat it if you want to," Tim said.
"Wait seriously," Tony asked.
"I mean, I don't know why you would want to but sure."
Tony looked over at Abby and saw a mischievous glint in her eyes, "Abby no-"
"Abby yes!"
"So let me get this straight," Tim said, in a voice full of regret, "You want to eat the Centipede that you burned to death."
"Yep."
"But why"
"Why not?"
"You know what, fine, you eat the bug."
"What does it taste like?" Tony asked.
"I don't know, what does it taste like Tim?" Abby asked.
McGee sighed and put his face in his hands, "Chicken."
"Why does the giant Centipede in fantasy land taste like chicken?"
"I don't know Tony; I wasn't expecting anyone to eat it."
"How about we move on to someone else now," Abby suggested.
"Sure," Tim said, leaping on the chance to forget about Abby eating the centipede, "So Jimmy and Tony it's your turn..."
Yes my friend ate a Centipede in a campaign, we excel at making our DM regret his life choices