This one was suggested by mashmaiden: Kensi teaches Deeks one of the many languages she knows - inspired by your ipa practice cuz in my head those go hand in hand.
Are you sure you want to do this?" Kensi asked as she joined Deeks on the couch and set a pile of books and papers in front of him.
"Definitely," Deeks said confidently.
"Ok, but before we get started, remember that I'm not a teacher by any means. Just because I speak several languages doesn't mean I'll be any good at teaching them."
"I have complete faith in you."
"Alright, then I guess we should get started," Kensi said, feeling a little reluctant. She was flattered that Deeks had asked her to help him learn Portuguese, but she severely doubted her abilities. Plus, she'd heard his attempts at Spanish and German, among other languages. "We can begin with a few common phrases."
Deeks leaned back, effecting a relaxed pose and winked at her.
"Você é linda, amor da minha vida."
"Oh, very good," Kensi complimented him. He looked inordinately pleased with himself. Apparently he'd picked up a few things in the last 10 years. "You got anything else, smarty pants?"
"Me chamo Deeks. Qual é o seu nome, Senhorita? Vamos comer pizza. Vamos comer tacos."
"Somebody's been paying attention." It made sense that he'd picked up a little over the years, but she was still impressed. Although, his pronunciation left quite a bit to be desired.
"Love, pizza, and tacos are all very important things," Deeks said reasonably. "And unfortunately therein lies my entire knowledge of the Portuguese language. Unless you want to order a bunch of random foods of dubious quantities or ask where to take your sick monkey."
"Where on earth did you-?" Kensi shook her head, cutting herself off. It was likely something Callen or Sam had taught him as a prank. "Ok, so you have a few basics. Or at least enough to either get a date or get smacked."
"Always my prerogative."
"Anyway, I'm going to teach you two very important phrases: Não compreendo, which means 'I don't understand.' And Alguém aqui fala inglês?, which means 'Does anyone speak English?'
"No comprendo," Deeks repeated confidently, glancing at Kensi for approval.
"That leaned a little towards Spanish, but overall very good," Kensi critiqued. "Now try Alguém aqui fala inglês?"
"Algem aqui falo ingles."
"Um, ok, let's try that again," Kensi said, rubbing the side of her head.
"What did I do wrong?" Deeks asked, not sounding offended, but more so eager to correct himself.
"Well, your vowels are kind of all over the place."
"Say it for me again." Kensi repeated the phrase again, this time more slowly, emphasizing the vowels and sounds that Deeks struggled with. They went back and forth like this for a few minutes until his pronunciation was more accurate.
"Ok, uh, maybe I should have used a different example," Kensi said about a half an hour later after Deeks' most recent attempt to use the phrase "I have a t-shirt."
"What was it this time?" Deeks asked with a sigh. His positive attitude was waning ever so slightly.
"So, t-shirt is camiseta, but you said camisinha, which means condom." Kensi explained patiently, trying to hold back her laughter. Deeks made a face at that.
"I mean that could come in handy, but you probably don't want to get those two mixed up."
"Yeah, somehow I highly doubt you'll ever need to ask a stranger for a condom," Kensi said, rolling her eyes.
"Hey, you never know what could happen during a case. Or if we ever make it to Portugal for vacation." He sighed again, ruffling his hair as he leaned forward and rested his chin on his folded arms. "I'm sorry I'm so bad at this," he said, sounding a little dejected.
"Oh no, baby, you're not bad at this," Kensi assured him, squeezing his hand.
"I bet it didn't take you or Callen or Sam five minutes to learn to ask where the bathroom is." He laughed self-deprecatingly, shrugging.
"That doesn't mean you're bad at it, you just need more practice."
"And you're willing to do that for me?" Deeks asked. "Even though I'm probably making your ears bleed right now."
"Well, you could use some phonetics practice, but you're not that bad. And even if you were, I would still help you."
"I studied phonetics a little bit in this linguistics class I had in college," Deeks said reminiscently.
"Did you enjoy it?"
"Mm, I did. Until the professor started talking about diacritics. I never did get the hang of those. For some reason she didn't like me very much."
"Well, I like you. And I'll do my best to make this a pleasant experience," Kensi promised. Smirking at him, she gave him a smacking kiss on the lips. "Eu acho você um detetive muito inteligente e sexy."
Deeks tilted his head, processing her words.
"Did you just call me a sexy Detective?" he asked uncertainly.
"Muito bom!" I also said you were very smart." Deeks looked pleased at that, his lips quirking into a small grin.
"Really?"
"Yes," Kensi confirmed. "And I think you know a lot more receptively than you realize. You just need to increase your confidence and expressive skills."
"I know something else that would give me confidence," he suggested, attempting to draw Kensi in for another kiss. She evaded him, moving to the other side of the couch.
"Uh-uh, mind out the gutter. We still have a lot more to get through today."
"You're the one who started the kissing."
"That's because I know you're best motivated by a rewards based system," Kensi teased, opening one of the books and sliding it over to Deeks. "Now read." Deeks sighed heavily.
"Well, at least you're a lot prettier than Mr. Mason in high school Spanish."
A/N: Supposedly this is what Kensi and Deeks were saying in Portuguese. Hopefully google wasn't too far off.
Deeks: You're beautiful, love of my life.
My name is Deeks. What's your name? Let's get pizza. Let's get tacos.
Kensi: You're a very smart and sexy detective.
Very good.
Since getting this prompt, I've decided that Deeks is a lot more self-conscious that he's the only one who doesn't speak another language well and that it's difficult for him.