4

Lady in Waiting

Narcissa positioned herself regally, her head held high, she had been cultivated to do so through years of aristocratic and pureblood teachings. They had imposed their way onto the beautiful blonde to ensure she acted to the highest standards; The Black family had long been part of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, there bloodline was said to transcend over seven centuries. The House of Black's family moto revolved around the purity of their lineage, "Toujours Pur", meaning always pure. Narcissa's mother, Druella Black, had instilled very strict mannerisms and customs onto her daughter.

Although Druella had been a cruel and unforgiving mother, she had displayed a soft spot for Narcissa. Bellatrix would often complain of how unfair their mother would be and how she seemed to be kinder to Narcissa simply because Druella and Narcissa looked similar in their appearance. Narcissa did not often agree with her sister, but deep down she had known that their mother always seemed to talk with distain towards Bellatrix, whereas she seemed to praise Narcissa more.

Narcissa, when young, had thought a lot of her parents. Her father, Cygnus Black, had been incredibly doting and loving, although he was absent a lot. He was often on trips abroad to ensure he continued to secure the Black's family fortune. Cygnus and Druella had high hopes that their beautiful Narcissa would marry into a prestigious house, but it was their other daughters they were more concerned for. Cygnus and Druella had been most excited when Narcissa came home to tell them that she had met Lucius Malfoy, the heir to Malfoy estate.

Narcissa sat with her thoughts, after twenty-two years of being a Malfoy, she had learnt when to appropriately display her emotions. She gazed around her ostentatiously decorated master bedroom and decided it was safe to relax her guard. She allowed some of her inner turmoil to be displayed as no one was currently in her remit. Her body slumped forward and began to slouch, she tried not to sob, but a few stray tears began to escape. She rose to her feet, wanting to change into her nightwear.

Narcissa headed to the dark-stained, opulent dresser as she was in search for her silky, black nightgown. It was the one she wore most often and owned several versions of it. Her favourite was the Slytherin green version, which was currently being laundered by the house elves. Lucius had allowed night clothes only, to be stored within their master bedroom, he seemed to believe that it was obscene to store their day clothes within a bedroom.

Both Narcissa and he had separate dressing rooms, which were magically concealed away from eyesight, only they could access their own dressing room. Lucius had always been fastidious with his dress sense and had no desire to share. Narcissa could often see where her son got his attributes from; both could be terribly spoilt sometimes. Narcissa, herself, had been equally like her husband, until she began to understand that her life had more value than just her appearance. Narcissa still considered herself 'vain', but she actively tried to be less so. She still enjoyed dressing up, ensuring she wore only outfits she considered herself beautiful in, she still took pride in her appearance, but it was no-longer her top priority. She had learnt that there simply was more to life than spending hours preening over yourself in a mirror.

Narcissa had now slipped into her expensive, silk black negligee and had sat herself down to brush her long hair. She had always found this activity calming as a child, so she had begun to automatically do it as reflex. She gazed at her reflection in her dressing table mirror, she sighed, her beautiful, fair hair had begun to lose its shine and was now streaked with the occasional silver strand.

When Narcissa had first discovered the first few silver strands, her response had been to impulsively go out to muggle London and find herself hair dye and darken her hair. She had tried to use a few charms on her hair, but they did not seem to have the same effect as the muggle hair dye. She had chosen to predominantly layer her into two parts: her fringe and roots were as dark as a raven's feather; the rest of her hair was perfectly fair.

Narcissa loved the dynamic of the way it looked, she had come to show Lucius with gushing pride, the first time she had done it, and his face fell into complete shock. He immediately asked her what on Earth she had done to her striking blonde hair, when Narcissa explained that she wanted a change Lucius had scoffed and refused to speak with her for several days. Despite Lucius' protesting behaviour, Narcissa refused to comply with his suggestions of changing her hair, and thus had kept it ever since.

Narcissa had completed brushing her hair, she placed down her silver, monogramed hairbrush and moved away from her reflection. She had little room in her mind for frivolous thoughts of how her hair looked at the moment, she crawled over to her large, mossy green four-poster bed and curled up in the centre. Her head lolled against a pillow as she began to silently cry. Narcissa selfishly was craving being held, but she had no idea where her husband was at present. She assumed he was probably in his study drinking to access – or perhaps he was seeking comfort with someone else that was not her.

Narcissa's hand slipped under her pillow, under there lay the handkerchief that Severus had given her two hours prior, she brought it up to her eyes and began to frantically dab at them. When she had wiped her tears away, she felt a relief wash over her as if crying had cleansed away some of her overwhelming thoughts. She looked at the corner of the cloth and used her fingers to trace over both initialled SS, this triggered the thought that Severus may be around, he could even still be with her husband.

With very little thought, Narcissa pulled herself up into a seated position and leant over to her bedside draws. Narcissa had sacrificed her wand so that her son could use it, she knew he would need it more. She was currently in search for her mother's old wand, which she had kept since she had died. She had found it comforting over the years to hold something that belonged to her mother, especially as it was small enough to hide away. She scrabbled to the back of the draw and found the object she was searching for, she pulled it forward and examined the dark wood.

Narcissa brought the wand up, feeling the unusual weight in her hands, it was much firmer than her own and shorter. She thought it best to test out her connection with the wand, she was not certain she had ever dared to do so before.

Just a simple spell will do, she thought.

"Accio, shawl!" She cried in a gruff voice.

She felt a cool tingling in her arm as her magic went through the wand, a small spark emitted that would not normally occur, but the wand seemed to accept her magic and suddenly, she saw her green shawl float towards her. She wrapped the shawl around her shoulders and sat up fully, a small smile upon her lips, she was pleased that the wand had accepted her magic. She knew it was rare for a Black's wand to change allegiances with such ease, but she guessed it was down to her having a close connection with her mother.

Narcissa thought it was time she tried casting the Patronus Charm, after all, that had been why she had sought out her mother's wand. Narcissa had learnt about the Patronus Charm when she had been around the age of eight, she had stolen one of Bellatrix's school books on charms and had been absolutely fascinated. Narcissa had not known how complex the charm truly was; it was beyond advanced magic for her age.

She had fallen in love with the thought of the what the embodiment of her Patronus could be. Narcissa had read that usually a Patronus took on the form of an animal the caster had an "affinity" with, and this made her desperate to find out what hers would be. With great excitement she tried to cast the charm, for her first few tries she had very little luck.

After a few months of practicing, she managed to produce a wispy streak of light, often known as an incorporeal Patronus. She had been incredibly frustrated when she had first locked eyes on the silvery light, she looked to make out what form it had taken. When she could not see anything other than a mist of silver, she had thrown her wand down in protest and had a little cry. It took Narcissa a full year to perfect the charm; she became obsessed with practising it each night when everyone in the Black household had been asleep.

Narcissa later learned how advanced the charm was for someone so young to learn. She had then begun to realise the potential of her magical ability, that she was in fact, an exceptionally gifted witch. Few could say they could cast a corporeal Patronus, let alone learnt it so young. Narcissa had found pride in her determination, it was a credit to herself, one which made her truly a Slytherin. There were only a few that she knew of that had managed to cast the charm at a young age, her niece, Nymphadora, being one of them. Still, Narcissa had learned the charm before she had attended Hogwarts.

Narcissa had not tried casting the Patronus charm in several years, so she was a little shaky when she managed to raise her mother's wand into the air. She cleared her mind and began to think of the first time she had held Draco, her arm moved in the spiral motion as she wordlessly cast the spell. A spark of mist shot out from the end of the wand, forming into a bright, silvery lynx. Narcissa smiled when her soft blue eyes met her familiar Patronus, it brought her great comfort upon seeing it.

The white lynx began to gracefully walk around in the middle of the air, haughtily looking at Narcissa. She chuckled softly at the lynx's expression, before she began to think how best to word her message to Severus.

"Where are you?" Narcissa's voice managed to call out to her lynx.

The lynx rose its head in acknowledgement to her and began to fade away, delivering a short and simple message to Snape, she knew it was a silly idea to bother him. She had cast a spell to disguise her voice, just in case he had company. It was not well-known that she could cast a Patronus, most assumed her to be unable to do so due to her being a 'dark' witch. Even her husband was not aware she could cast a Patronus.

It was legend that those who carried the Dark Mark had no need for a Patronus as the Dementors were in collaboration with the Dark Lord, they all seemed to share an affinity for the darkness. Narcissa had never taken the Dark Mark, though. She had never wanted to. She believed this is how she could still cast a Patronus Charm. Narcissa only knew of one person who could cast the Patronus Charm and bore a Dark Mark: that was Severus Snape. Snape had shared this with her one evening.

Narcissa began to twirl her hair as she nervously waited to see if Snape would respond. Moments past and no response was given. Sighing, she scrambled back over to lay her head onto her pillow, feeling exhausted. She was beginning to question if she had even done the right thing by sending him a message via her Patronus, after all her actions had been done in haste.

A pop could be heard, just before Teeny appeared in front of her mistress holding a bottle of wine. Teeny had changed since earlier, she had donned a small, traditional waiter's suit. Narcissa tried to stifle a small laugh, she never understood where Teeny got her clothes from. Perhaps she had the tailor made?

Narcissa had petitioned strongly for their house elves to be paid for the work they did, Lucius had obliged, wanting his wife to be happy. Draco had inspired her with this notion a few years prior, when he returned home for the holidays complaining about his classmate, Hermione Granger, and how she was running a club named S.P.E.W. He had thought it was hilariously funny that a Muggleborn viewed house elves as slaves, he did not agree with her ideas. Narcissa, on the other hand, believed the girl had a point.

"Mistress Lady Malfoy, Teeny could sense somethings was not right— is her ladyship, okay? Teeny is worried about you." Teeny squeaked.

Narcissa smiled fondly at her personal elf, she wiped at her eyes and then reached out to stroke Teeny's arm affectionally. Teeny had been Narcissa's house elf ever since she was small, Narcissa could not remember a time before Teeny was in her life. She had helped raise Narcissa, this is how Teeny got away with being motherly towards her and outrageously cheeky.

"Oh, Teeny, thank you— I am…I will be fine, I am just behaving like a Gryffindor, letting my emotions get the better of me. How silly I am."

"But Mistress is sad, she's not a Gryffindor! Teeny will not hear such nonsenses from Mistress. I cannot have that; I is here to listen if Mistress needs it. I brings you a little wine to settle the nerves." Teeny replied. She then poured Narcissa a small glass of red and handed it to her.

Narcissa thought it was improper to be drinking within the master bedroom, but she soon squashed that thought down as more was occupying her mind at present, she also could not face being anywhere else. She had positioned herself in a more upright position in order to drink some of the wine that Teeny had poured for her. The blonde witch began to take small sips and felt her body beginning to lose some of its tension, she disliked her slight dependency on alcohol. She had noticed it more of late, especially since Lucius had become dependent on the substance. He was more often drunk than he was sober, she hated seeing him this way and had tried her best to help. Lucius was a stubborn man and refused to see fault in his actions.

Narcissa was grateful for Teeny coming in to take care of her, she very much appreciated it. The house elf frequently did this for her, she always had her best interests at heart, always knowing when Narcissa needed her. Teeny continued to watch Narcissa as if waiting for her to say something.

"Mistress, is there anything Teeny can do for you?" She asked softly.

"Just sit with me, Teeny, I could use the company." Narcissa replied.

Teeny and Narcissa sat in silence for a while, it was a comfortable silence. Narcissa felt more at ease with having company, it eased her anxiety. Narcissa disliked being alone for too long, as her mind would become overactive with thoughts and worry.

Teeny suddenly moved away from her Mistress's bed and stood up, her hands folding to the side.

"Mistress, Master Malfoy is comings up the stairs, Teeny can sense his presence, I be going now… Teeny does not want to intrude." Teeny stammered, it was clear to Narcissa that Teeny was a little scared of Lucius. "I thinks he been drinking, if Mistress needs me, I will come back of course."

Teeny clicked her fingers and disappeared.

Narcissa vanished her wineglass and began to sit herself up, she knew that Lucius would not be in any mood to tolerate her emotional side. She cleared her mind using Occlumency and waited for him to enter. She heard his footsteps just outside the door, before he clumsily pressed down on the handle.

Lucius stumbled into the room and looked at Narcissa, his eyes were red-rimmed, and his jaw was slack. Normally Narcissa found her husband the epitome of beauty, he was an incredibly attractive man, with well-proportioned features and a chiselled jawline, but as of late he just seemed to be ill-kept and looking tired. Narcissa had always loved her husband's long fair hair, but even his beautiful, luscious hair looked unwashed and greasy.

"Hello, my love." She forced herself to sound much cheerier than she felt, repressing all her own feelings in order to focus on his needs. From the look Lucius gave her he clearly disapproved of her cheery tone, he did little to greet her and made his way into his dressing room. Narcissa followed him, refusing to allow him to push her away.

"Darling, please talk to me. I know you are upset, and I imagine you are incredibly hurt—" Narcissa began but was interrupted by Lucius.

"—D-do not pretend you understand what I am feeling, Narcissa! It is not you who has had their wand stolen, is it?"

Narcissa sighed so gently that he could not hear and cautiously took a step closer to her husband. He smelt strongly of alcohol. Narcissa knew she had to preserve with him, he was an incredibly stubborn man, he often felt embarrassed and ashamed of his emotions. She reached her hand out and began to gently stroke his chest.

"My love, I am sorry for my poor choice of words, I simply wanted to bring you some comfort, but I can see how frustrating that must have sounded. I know I cannot change what has happened, nonetheless I want to support you. Please come and be with me, I have missed you terribly." Narcissa pleaded with him, hoping this would bridge the gap that was currently between them.

Lucius' eyes softened in response; he was finally listening to her words. He pulled Narcissa to his chest, his arms enveloping around her waist. He sighed softly and bent his head to place a delicate kiss onto her lips.

"I am a very foolish man," he confessed to her. "I am sorry, Cissy, I should not take it out on you." Lucius looked remorseful as he spoke, which eased Narcissa's mind. She leant into him and lay her head onto his shoulder. One of his hands began to wander to her bottom, he squeezed it very gently and peppered kisses up her neck.

"You do look perfectly exquisite this evening," His voice whispered into her ear, it sounded husky and dripping with intention.

Narcissa felt a little uncomfortable with how he was now responding to her, she had simply wanted to show him affection without it leading to anything more intimate. She was not in the mood for sex, particularly since he was intoxicated. Lucius often had a higher libido when drinking, she was aware of this, but she wished he would understand that she was not always in the mood.

She knew she had to articulate her next few sentences well, as to not upset the man, he was already emotionally vulnerable. It was a precarious line for her to find as she knew he would never force her to sleep with him, but he would try his best to persuade her.

"Thank you, darling," She replied with a faux blush upon her cheeks. "Now, behave yourself! I think it best you rest; you have had such an emotional day. I know your inhabitations are heightened when drinking, but perhaps a shower and bed?"

Lucius' eyes hardened a little, he seemed to understand her words, but only nodded in response. He was clearly upset and simply thought it best to not burden Narcissa with his feelings. He pressed a kiss on top of her head, then side-stepped away from her and took several strides, creating distance between them.

"Okay." Lucius replied.

The fair-haired wizard began to pull a few items of clothing from their hangers and bunched them into one hand.

"I am going for a shower," he announced as he stormed out.

Narcissa allowed him to exit the dressing room, this time she did not follow him. She would leave him to his theatrics and hoped a shower would calm him.

I excepted worse. At least he did not snap or yell.

Narcissa refused to feel bad, she had presumed he would take matters into his own hands if he so desired. There was a lot of love between the two of them, Narcissa loved him deeply, but at times she was a little embarrassed with his toddler-like behaviour. She was beginning to lose her patience with it all. The witch decided it was time for her to get into bed, she would wait up for him, though.

An hour or so passed before Lucius emerged out of their en suite bathroom, he filled the room with a wonderful scent of bergamot and jasmine. Narcissa raised her head to look over at him, he had finally shaven away the stubble which, in Narcissa's opinion, looked obscene on him. Even his hair had more shine to it.

Lucius locked eyes with his wife, sorrow and sadness was held with them.

"Cissy, I-I… what is it that is wrong with me? It is quite evident there is something the matter with me – do you no longer love me or find me attractive?" Lucius questioned her.

Narcissa scoffed at his self-pity, she knew he was self-centred, but sometimes he did surprise her with the levels he could go to. She tried to see it from his angle, she could feel the pain laced within his words and knew he was doubting himself; he was in search for validation. Narcissa would pander to his needs to a line.

"Lucius, there is nothing wrong with you; I absolutely adore you! You silly man. Please do not be hurt by my rebuff, I, to be frank, just do not feel comfortable having intercourse with you when you have drunk so much." Narcissa decided it was best to no longer mince her words.

Lucius scowled in response, he seemed to be in denial when it came to his level of intoxication. Narcissa had tried subtle ways to suggest this to him in the past, he often ignored her attempts. It would seem being brutally honest with him just had riled him.

"You are a fine one to talk, Narcissa." Lucius said in a cutting tone. "It is not your place to comment on such a thing, I am the patriarch of this home, I will not stand for such insolence. Perhaps it is best if I sleep elsewhere this evening!"

Lucius turned on his heel and slammed the door shut.

Author's Note:

Oh dear. All is not well in the Malfoy household; tensions are running high.

Happy New Year, everyone. I am welcoming 2022 with a chapter update! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, I had fun writing from Narcissa's point of view, she really is a wonderful character. Please let me know what you think, leave a review if you have time. Thank you for all the follows and favourites. Love to you all – FlyingAlone xx