Chapter 42: Heartbreak
I voiced my frustration to try to get him to understand that we couldn't be together anymore. I would have to leave school, leave everything I had ever known to figure out how my life would have to be now. "Aethna, please. Just listen." I shook my head, tears still falling. "Hey, what's wrong with your eyes?" I looked at my hands and saw my tears dripping into them…except they were red tinged. I wiped my eyes and saw the normal tears were now partially blood red. I showed my hands to Neville, "See, this is not normal. Will never be normal. I can't stay in your world. I have to leave…for good this time."
He took a step back and ran a hand through his hair. "How many times are you going to run from us? No matter what I say, you seem to just do what you want. Don't you see how much this is breaking my heart just thinking about you not being with me anymore?" I was trembling and it wasn't because of the air. I looked down at my ruined dressed, my bloody body. I couldn't allow my love for Neville to get him killed….by me. "It's for the best….truly. It will hurt, but it will fade. You'll forget about me…and move on. Neville please, just let me go. Let me save you. Let me protect you…from me." I took another step back and he stepped forward, reaching for me. "Aethna, I can't. I couldn't forget about you after years of thinking you were dead! I couldn't think that you were truly gone! It would have destroyed me. If you leave…I won't survive, I'll be as good as dead."
I remembered our promise a month or so ago, we swore we would face things together from that moment on…but this is not what I was expecting. His life wasn't made for my kind, my future wasn't right for him. There was no way for our lives to work…as long as we were together. "Neville, this is different. I was uncharted before…but now it's almost certain I'm going to be more vampire than witch and human. I can't even stand in the sun anymore. I can't return to school, I can't go out during the day, I may not even be able to eat normal food anymore! Everything has changed because I wasn't strong enough!"
My heart was breaking as I took another step back, wishing he wouldn't step forward after me. "Aethna, please. Let's just go back to the manor. I'll talk to Gran, maybe Dumbledore can help. Just…I'm begging you…don't leave me again." I began to shake my head, I didn't want to endanger anyone else. "I can't…no matter how much I want to." I whispered, wishing I could go back in time and change this. We both jumped at the sound of his grandmother shouting. "I do not care what my grandson said. I will not have you inside my house. Leave!" Nikolas's voice was right after that. "Please. Aethna and Neville will return shortly and explain everything. I do apologize. I will wait outside."
He quickly appeared outside the doors and looked over at us, seeing me and Neville a few feet apart. "You should go calm your grandmother down…" I took another step back and this time, Neville remained still. His eyes were filled with tears, his lips trembling, fist by his sides. "Alright." was all he said before he turned and walked away without looking back. I sank to my knees, feeling my heart go with him as he walked passed Nikolas and inside, slamming the door behind him. Nikolas came out to me in a hurry and bent down to me. "Aethna, what's happened? Are you hurt?" his fingers brushing the blood tinged tears on my cheeks. "I'm finally free of my father and he still ruins my life."
"Doesn't Neville accept you? I assumed…" "He does…too much. It's me that's forcing me to leave. It's me that's choosing to leave him so I don't ruin his life too." he makes me look at him. "But if it is his choice to want you to stay…why take his choice?" I blinked, then scoffed. "You can't understand. You don't have the power I have. You are almost normal. You can be normal!" he recoiled from my words, then sighed. "Very true. I am not as powerful as you. I am less vampire than you, even before you gained our father's power. Yet I am not human either. I do not fit into the normal world. I have enough of vampire blood running in me to put me exactly where you fit."
His eyes bore into mine, showing his hurt and frustration of his life as well. "I have had a difficult life as well. Maybe not as bad as yours…but still, I do not fit in anywhere either." "At least you have your uncle, your family isn't trying to murder you…" "My uncle? He isn't my real uncle. After I was born and our father deemed me too weak to be his heir, tossed me out. Aethna, I was only 6 years old. Left for dead, until my uncle found me. He took me in, showed me to control the small powers I had, showed me how family could be. But he isn't truly my family. Not like you are. We are brother and sister, found each other and finally our monster of a father is gone. Our lives are going to be different now. You are free to live your life, no more looking over your shoulder, no more running from him."
I went to argue, but was too tired to care. After taking a long deep breath, I stood up and started toward the house. "I'm going to go get some rest and then pack my stuff…then I will be leaving. If your uncle has already left then I suggest you go find him. There's no place for you here. Sorry." he stopped following me as my words cut into him. I didn't pause as I walked inside and shut the door on him. I began the walk up the stairs when I overheard whispering. "Gran, please. You have to help. She's really going to leave." "Neville, if she chooses to leave, then it is her choice. She is a guest here, not a prisoner. I will not force her to remain. If it is as you say, her father is gone and she is not needed to be protected anymore."
"She does though, she's going through so much more now. She needs us…she needs me. I have swore to protect her and face everything with her…but she is just so stubborn, she won't listen at all. She thinks she is protecting me, but I have to be with her. Gran…I love her…" there was a long pause before she spoke again, "Of course you do, darling child. I've known for years. I just didn't know who she was until she came here. I didn't think it was more than a crush until I was around her so much. She is an amazing young woman. Then I saw how you two were around each other and knew that it was more than I could ever believe. I knew you two would have struggles in life, but she is determined and it would seem so are you."
"However, I will not keep her here if she doesn't want to stay. You are young, but you have to understand that she is different than anyone else in the world. She is going to go through a lot more than you will ever have to go through. If she doesn't want to drag you down with her, I can only hope you will forgive her for making the hard choice and leaving." I heard footsteps and stepped back into a corner, shadowing myself in darkness. Augusta came down slowly, taking her time, however Neville was rushing down after her, his feet thundering down the stairs.
"Gran, I'm truly asking for your help. I know I'm not the grandson you wanted, I know I've never lived up to our family name. I know I'm useless…but don't let me lose the best thing that has ever happened to me. She is my world, I can't lose her. I've lost so much already, I was depressed about my parents, depressed about my magic…until she gave me a reason to live. She chose me, after seeing how useless I was, how terrible and weak I was….and she still chose to care about me. She chose to tell me I was strong, I had a power inside that just needed a reason to come out. That I was worthy of my family name. That she was proud of me. I wanted to better myself to make her words true. I couldn't bare the thought of letting her down, making her see how wrong she was about me. She has always put me first, above everything else, me. My safety and well being was her only reason in life it seemed. Even now, it's tearing her apart to even think about leaving me, but she feels it's the only way possible. I need to prove to her that it's not. I don't care if life is hard for us. If everyone doesn't understand and hates us. I don't care if we have to leave and never return, all I care about is her, I need to be with her always!"
His confession stopped her at the bottom of the stairs and she faced him, before nodding. "Very well. I will speak with her and see what I can do. You are strong Neville, and I am proud to call you my grandson. A fine young man you have become. However, your words may have a better affect on her." her eyes flashed over to me, hiding in the shadows. Neville's eyes followed her and I stepped out, meeting his gaze. "I'll leave you to it." she walked away, leaving Neville standing at the middle of the stairs while I was almost at the top. "Aethna…you didn't leave…"