Chapter 15 – Friday

It was Friday morning. Emma entered her husband's hospital room. She visited every day, but she hadn't used any magic the day before. She knew that her last attempt dealt with a lot, and she wanted to give his mind time to rest after that. Plus, she had a feeling about where she would go this next time around. It would be the most challenging moment to face, for Killian and for her.

She would be facing a moment from a time where she was part of his life. She wasn't sure how that would feel. How much of her own feelings and memories of that time would come into play and affect her as well as him? Of course it wouldn't be the same as what Killian was going through on his end of this, but she was beginning understand even more his concerns from the day they were theorizing all of this. And yeah, she probably would have tried to avoid this at all costs if she was in Killian's place. But he would be there to guide her back, and that's what she would do her best to do for him now. And when he was recovered and back to his normal self, she was definitely gonna bake that rum cake for his bravery and incredible trust in going through this. He deserved that at the very least.

She took a deep breath, held it, and let it out again to relax herself. Then she sparked her magic between her hand and Killian's. She was a messenger with one last stop to make.

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Emma saw Killian in the woods in Camelot, but she wasn't given time to approach him before being pulled away. Next, she saw him in Granny's with Merlin, and just as quickly she saw him on his ship fighting with Gold. This had happened once before, and Emma expected to wake up since Killian's mind wouldn't let her in. Either this was going too far and this was a door that couldn't be opened, or his mind was still on defense from a couple days ago and he needed more time.

To her surprise, she was placed in the clock tower in Storybrooke, and she wasn't promptly whisked away. It took her a few moments to get her bearings, and in those few moments Killian must have sensed that she, or someone, was near.

"That stunt didn't work on the Jolly Roger, Swan. It won't work this time either." Killian commented while taking her in. His tone and his face gave the impression that he was bored. His eyes though gave a different reaction, one of shock, wariness, pain, and irritation.

"One point for realizing that I'm different. You also lose that point because you still think I'm the Dark One with a trick." She said tilting her head in acknowledgment, doing her best to keep things calm and neutral. Killian typically had a short fuse in these moments. Right now as a Dark One, she knew he would be really unhappy with her. But she wasn't going to tip toe or walk on eggshells.

"If you expect me to believe that suddenly you're no longer the Dark One then you must think me a fool. But I am no fool, not any more. My eyes are open, and I see the truth." He warned, coming closer until there was only a foot between them. He looked and sounded every bit the anger-and-revenge-filled villain he used to be. He had every right to be angry. But instead of letting some of that anger out when he found her at Regina's, it was happening now.

"I don't think you're a fool." She answered honestly. He just had the rug ripped out from under him less than an hour ago, and he had Zelena and the darkness putting ideas in his head. Honesty was her best route. "Right now, Emma is still a dark one, but I'm not because I'm not really here."

"First the Crocodile and then Nimue are in my head. Now I'm seeing you again. Bloody hell!" His words of anger were followed by the echoing noise of metal on metal as he moved away from her and slammed his hook against the wall. "I thought you had bad timing before, but this is when I need you the least."

"No, this is when you need me the most!" She yelled back, but she wasn't angry or upset. She just wanted to get his attention, to have him listen.

Unlike the real Emma from this time, she had her head on straight and her emotions in check. She didn't have clouded judgment and emotions leading to questionable methods of getting rid of the darkness to save Killian. She just had to shine the nightlight to help him make the choice that she already knew he would end up making when the time came.

"Because I'm the Dark One about to go on a rampage of darkness?" He replied, turning back to her and throwing his arms up in frustration. It wasn't a real question. His anger and sarcasm made it a mocking accusation. "This is what you made me!"

"I'm not here because of that. I've told you before I can't change what you do or what's going on around you. I'm here because you're hurting." She told him with no intention of backing down. The last part slipped out without her really realizing though, but it was honest nonetheless.

"Do you really think I want you to help me? You're the one that's bloody caused it this time! Has it been you the whole time? Why didn't I recognize you as the one that appeared in my past when we met? What other memories have you taken from me?" He rattled off question after question as each thought dawned on him. Each question grew with emotional intensity and volume. He finally stopped when he had let everything out, his anger let loose and vented out for now. But the evidence was clear in his eyes that something was still raging under the surface, probably more anger and irritation, and most definitely more pain.

When she said that he was hurting, she meant because of what Dark One Emma had done. The things that had been kept from him were brutally revealed. That's why he was making some of the decisions that he made. Now, she could see that she had hurt him as well. Right now he felt betrayed by what she was doing, like this was nothing but a game. He thought she was still lying to him, even if he believed that she was different from Dark One Emma. To him she was doing something far worse.

"It's part of the magic that allows me to be here. When I disappear from your sight, and you leave this tower, all you'll recall is colors instead of a face, yellow for my hair and maybe red for the jacket. As for our conversations, those are vague, and you only really remember the main points I was trying to get across to give you hope." She explained everything, being more honest with him about what was going on than every previous time. Her words came slow and steady to show that she was telling the truth, holding nothing back, and not trying to start a fight.

"I don't want or need hope, Emma. I'm about to get what I've always wanted." He told her, so confident and full of himself that his feelings of betrayal seemed forgotten. "You once said 'the only one who saves me is me'. You broke out of Regina's dungeon, and I'm breaking out of a dungeon of my own making by trying to be a good man. That has only led to weakness and betrayal. I'm finally going to get my revenge. I don't need anyone to do it for me, and no is going to stop me."

To Emma, his behavior was similar to that of the man he had been before giving up his revenge. But even then there was still something in him, something that kept him from being an all-out villain, something that was gone now. It wasn't Killian that had just spoken, only the Dark One.

"I'm a different Emma, remember? I'm not trying to stop you, Killian." She stressed that point.

Taking a deep breath then letting it out, she tried to figure out how she was supposed to reason with the Dark One rather than Killian. Everything she did when this was her present instead of her past backfired. Letting go of the darkness was all to Killian's credit not hers.

"I honestly don't know what I'm supposed to say here." She threw her arms in the air, almost in surrender but not quite. She wouldn't give up that easily. "You don't want to listen to me right now because of what I've done, and I don't blame you. You've also got the darkness telling you things, and Rumpelstiltskin is aggravating, I know."

She ran her fingers through her hair, trying to think, and not really paying attention to Killian anymore. It was so quiet in the tower that she could actually hear the sound of her leather jacket as it adjusted with the movement of her arms. That's when she realized that Killian hadn't interrupted or taken control of the conversation in her silence. He was listening finally when she wasn't really doing anything except rambling and kind of talking to herself. But if that's what got through to him, she might as well roll with it.

"Maybe there's nothing I can say because you already said it." She shrugged. "You are the one to do this, and nothing can stop you. Whether that means, getting your revenge and following the darkness in order to destroy the light, or deciding to have strength over the darkness and destroy it instead."

It was difficult dealing with a time in his life that she was part of. She was getting so caught up in trying to fix and do better than she had in the past. She wanted to do right by him when she had made a huge mess before. But that wasn't the point of this. She was supposed to put the nightlight on, get in and get out. This wasn't about her. Or was it?

She knew this was her final stop in this endeavor. After this it was up to him whether he'd wake up again. It was up to him whether he'd beat the magic or not in the present. And it was up to him to overcome the darkness or not in the here and now. She already knew the outcome of the latter. Sure she wished that things had gone differently, but ultimately she accepted what happened, they both had. Now, she needed to accept that her work here was done.

Knowing and accepting that were two different things. She needed to let go, like Killian had told her many times between Camelot and the Underworld. If she held on to this moment she'd only be going in circles, exhausting herself and her efforts, like Rogers advised her against. She had done her part, and to do more than that would only cause problems. Her talk with Killian from that night when it was first announced that Mr. Cobblepot was dead came to mind. Killian overcame the darkness within him, and she had to trust that he would overcome this magic too. She wasn't giving up, she just had to step back so he could do his own thing.

"You're going to leave the Dark One to his own deeds?" His question was uncanny, as if he knew what she was thinking, what she had just decided in her mind. "That sounds like a bad idea. Then again, so does turning me into the Dark One in the first place."

Emma felt like a flip had suddenly been switched. He was angry again, and she took that as a good sign oddly enough. She figured if he was angry then it was Killian at the helm and not the darkness. Thank goodness he couldn't read her mind though with a thought like that, her pirate and his phrases.

"You said you were here, not to stop me, but because I'm hurting." He continued and pointed his hook in her direction. "Yet you haven't said a word about it since. Are you pretending as if it never happened because you feel that guilty, or because you simply never cared at all?"

"Shut up, Hook! I messed up, and I'll take the heat for it, but don't accuse me of that!" She hollered right back at him, matching his volume and anger.

She finally lost it, her level head gone. This wasn't his first accusation, here in this time or any of the other trips she'd made. But that one really ticked her off. She kicked the wall in frustration; guess she could make contact with stuff while in this state after all. This wasn't about him finding his inner strength and defeating the darkness anymore, and it wasn't about him being the better man that he wanted to be. This was just vindictive and pointless arguing.

"The Dark One is cruel, but don't be stupid!" She added, but with a little less heat than last time. He had lot off his steam, and now she had let out some of hers.

She cared. He knew it, and she knew he knew it. But the anger and hurt he was feeling couldn't be helped right now. It was another sign that her job was done, and she was ready to let go now. She would apologize. He deserved that, even if he wasn't ready to hear it. And she would give one more bit of incite, just to make sure that the nightlight was plugged in all the way and would stay on. This was not an energy saving bulb situation.

"I am sorry, Killian. I shouldn't have, but I did what I had to do. Soon you and Emma will both do what you have to. You'll understand then. You'll be ready for help, and Emma will be there."

"My Emma and not yourself? And where will you be? You've appeared to me all these times, but you won't be there to swoop in and convince me to be a hero again?" He asked, also in a calm manner, comparatively speaking. It surprised her. His questions seemed genuine. There was no outward or underlying accusation. And he referred to her, the Emma that was still the Dark One, as his Emma. As frustrating as all of this was, it was worth it for that.

"No one's going to convince you of that, like we've already said, it's up to you. As for me, I don't know for sure what's going to happen next." She replied with a shrug, being honest with him and with herself, and still a smile found its way on her face. "But I think my work is finished, and I think I'll go home, and I think everything is going to be more than okay."

Her eyes were watering and a tear slipped down her cheek as her voice got caught in her throat a little at the end. This was by far the most emotional thing she had experienced so far. But she needed it just as much as he did to get through this. This wasn't going to get the best of either of them. With a smile still on her face, she felt her magic pull her away for the last time.

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When Emma woke up this time, she was more exhausted than she had ever felt. But she was also more excited than she ever felt, even after the success of her very first attempt. She knew it was unlikely that he'd instantly open his eyes. She still checked of course, but that was the reason for her excitement. She felt sick to her stomach when she first realized that Killian had been bitten. Since then she tried to have hope, and most of the time she managed to keep her worry under control, but it was always just under the surface. Now, she just knew that he would pull through. She couldn't say what exactly it was about this final trip she'd taken to his past, and really their past, that confirmed this for her. But she wasn't going to over think this. She was just going to enjoy this feeling of the weight lifting off her shoulders.

"Hey, babe, it worked. Thanks for letting me in." She spoke and brushed back his hair from his forehead. "I'm going to go home and sleep. Maybe when I wake up and come back you'll be awake too."

A nurse had mentioned to her in passing that people in comas could still hear. They might not have complete understanding or even remember it when they woke up, but they could recognize voices and sounds. She didn't sit there and talk for hours. But since then she at least gave quick little updates and let him know when she was coming and going.

"Love you," She whispered and gave him a short kiss.

She missed him, but she knew their time apart was growing short. She once told him to be patient, and now she had to remind herself of that. It was no longer an anxious impatience, but just an eagerness to be with him again. It certainly wasn't easy to give up control, but she trusted him.

"See you soon." She added before leaving.

Wow this was a big one! This story isn't over yet, but this section is finished. I wanted to get it just right, and I hop you enjoyed it. This was a tricky one. I didn't want to repeat scenes or discussions that take place in the show. I actually wrote it from Killian's pov first. Then I went back and added Emma's thoughts, but kept the dialogue the same. Let me know if you'd be interested in seeing that. I may do an outtake. Also, next time we get to spend some time with Kristoff and Anna!