S-3_C-7: More Recent Things

My mobility chair hovered over the carpeted floor as I followed Kylo into the bedroom. As with every mission, he'd returned exhausted, despondent, and in desperate need of a shower. I listened as he undressed in the fresher, telling me about the latest, miraculous escape by the Resistance fleet. They grew more desperate and cunning by the day.

I just wanted the war to be over so we could live our lives in peace.

"Bathe with me?" I heard him ask, breaking me from my thoughts.

I smiled at him. "Sure."

Crossing the room in only his light clothes, Kylo bent down to pick me up out of my chair. He held me gingerly, being particularly careful with my broken leg. He set me on the bathroom counter and reached to unbutton my shirt.

"I can do that part," I laughed.

He smirked at me, and I felt his eyes watching as I started to undress. I stole a peek at his face; being eye-level with him was a rare treat. I wasn't surprised when his lips found mine a moment later. He kissed me sweetly at first, melting his pouty lips against mine. When his tongue slipped past my lips, I gasped into his mouth. I returned the kiss until he unexpectedly pulled away.

His head fell into the crook of my neck, and his arms slid around my torso. He pulled me forward gently, melding our bodies together. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the weight of his tense body against me.

"I want this damn war to be over," he murmured into my skin.

A frown tugged at my lips. "Me, too," I sighed, threading my fingers through his hair. I scraped my nails over the spot he liked, and he relaxed against me.

Lurching awake, I drew in a sharp breath. My dream lingered briefly in my mind—a collection of lights, shadows, and words. Usually, having a dream about him would push me into a depressed state. However, that day, I pulled myself out of bed to start my day with ease.

I put on my usual white shirt, carefully wrapping the left sleeve to fully cover the metal and scars on my arm. I twisted my hair into a long braid that hung over my shoulder. Looking at myself in the mirror, I found that my cheeks had a bit more color than normal. It must be from going to bed so early last night.

Since John and Laye had stayed in town overnight, I began my morning chores without making breakfast. I munched on a half of bread that had gone a bit stale and left the rest on the table, hoping Ben would find it once he woke up. I tapped the silos with my baton, twirling it aimlessly between each one. I was happy to hear that most of them sounded full. The morning was quiet and peaceful after the mild sandstorm the night before, and I enjoyed the silence.

I walked the rows of vegetables with my clippers, nipping dead leaves here and there and humming an old tune. A large harvest was due. After inspecting the sprinklers, I started the task of diverting drinking water to the house. I put a large bucket under the valve that connected to the silos and filled it halfway. Lifting the bucket with a grunt, I poured it into the metal troth that supplied the pipes leading to the house. The water swirled down the drain and into the underground reservoir below. I made two trips back and forth before—

"Lucia?"

I jumped in surprise and struggled to keep my balance as the water bucket sloshed dramatically. When it lurched completely to one side, I dropped it with a thud and spilled water across the limestone floor. I reached to pick up the bucket, but a broad hand grabbed it first.

"I'm so sorry," he said, bashfully meeting my eye.

I waved a dismissive hand before taking the empty bucket from him. "Don't worry," I laughed, glancing at the soaked floor. "There's more where that came from."

He was looking over the elaborate system of pipes on the back wall. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Our silos automatically feed the sprinklers, but the house system is completely separate," I explained, pointing to each respectively. "We have to move the water ourselves."

"Oh, um, in that case…" He gently took the bucket out of my hands. His eyes were trained on my face, causing me to shrink slightly under his gaze. "Let me."

My heart stuttered in my chest. "I...thank you," I mumbled.

After showing him the tedious process, I retrieved a basket to start harvesting some vegetables. He helped me with that, too. The hydro bay got a lot warmer as the morning suns crept higher in the sky. We worked in comfortable silence, but I caught him glancing in my direction every so often. Such a large harvest had never been so quick and easy before.

I decided to make a large stew with all the old veggies cluttering the pantry. As Ben finished moving the harvest into the wet pantry, I seasoned some water and set it to boil on the stove. I cleared a spot on the counter to cut up the larger veggies. When Ben came into the kitchen, my eyes immediately found him.

"What can I do?" he asked, glancing at the ingredients strewn about.

"You've done enough already," I stated, gesturing to the table with my knife. I started dicing the purple potato on the plastic board in front of me.

Ben hovered at my side awkwardly. "But I want to help," he said earnestly.

His willingness to work touched me. "Really," I said, shaking my head, "it's fine."

To my surprise, he moved closer—so close that our legs touched—and took the knife out of my hand. Our eyes met momentarily, and a dazzling smile appeared on his face. I stepped away as he murmured, "I helped in the kitchen as a youngling, so...just tell me how you want them."

His sudden assertiveness left me speechless. I turned around to hide the smile on my face. "Um...diced, please," I said faintly.

I busied myself with depodding some beans as the sound of chopping vegetables filled the room. We stood with our backs to each other, working on opposite counters. Having help in the kitchen was a nice change of pace.

"I was thinking," Ben started. "I—If you don't mind...I'm curious about your life here."

I knew exactly what he meant. He wants to know what happened to me after...him. I subconsciously began censoring certain parts that I didn't wish to share. "What would you like to know about?" I hedged.

He seemed to really think about his answer for a few moments. I nervously awaited his response, my fingers working in jerky movements. "How did you get into the moisture farming business?" he finally asked.

The neutrality of the question almost made me laugh. "Well," I began, trying to keep the nerves from my voice. "We do it to self-sustain. Back when this place was a First Order safe-house, the silos were there but that was it. Once our credits started running out, we built the pipework and hydroponic bays from scratch." I pictured those dark, early days in my mind. It was around that time when John and I started arguing. "John spent the last of our credits on starting the shop in Mos Espa so we could afford supplies."

"Shop?"

"Yes, the droid repair shop. You saw it."

"Oh, right." A long pause followed. "What happened to the others that were with you, back then?"

I frowned. "Commander Adas, my bodyguard, and Major Duval, my doctor, both died when the New Republic raided the estate." Drawing in a breath, I held it for a moment before adding, "They both refused to renounce the First Order."

There was an even longer pause.

"After that, we destroyed everything that could tie us to the First Order. Speeders, armor, even storage crates. We've been lucky to fly under the Rangers' radar." I shook my head. "We've practically disappeared out here."

I only realized that he had stopped chopping when the sound suddenly resumed. "I'm glad," he finally said. "It seems like you have a steady life now."

"Mostly steady," I amended, thinking of my frequent fights with John. I then pictured the child living with Gran Cara, and a spike of fear shot through me at the thought of Ben asking about him.

To my relief, Ben said, "You and Vegas…"

I released the breath I had been holding. "Yes?" I hedged.

"Are you...well, um—" He sighed sharply as if frustrated with his own vocal cords. "Are you together?" he asked evenly.

"We're friends," I said. "We always have been and we always will be."

"But, have you…"

My brow furrowed. Is he asking what I think he's asking? "Never," I said. "He's with Laye."

"I see." His tone relaxed when he found the answer he'd been searching for. I couldn't help but smile to myself as I reached for another handful of beans to shuck.

"It's been a lonely two years," I mused aloud.

He hummed in agreement. "Yes, it has."

My head tilted to the side; I felt suddenly curious about what he had been doing for the past two years. "Tell me about Ahch-To," I murmured.

"There's not much to tell," Ben hedged. "It's extremely remote. The locals are...archaic. They don't even speak Basic." He paused as if reflecting. "I lived in isolation."

I frowned. And I thought I lived an isolated life. "There was no one for you to talk to?"

"No." He sighed. "I claimed an old cottage away from the village. Most days I just meditated and...ate a lot of fish."

The mental image of him sitting on a beach with a fishing pole was somehow hilarious. Without warning, I burst into laughter. "You...fished?" I asked, barely able to form the words.

I heard him clear his throat in embarrassment. "I did. It's pretty easy using the Force."

I covered my mouth with my hands to stifle my laughter, even as I pictured a very confused fish floating out of the water. "That's—" I gasped, trying to collect myself. "That's, ha...very interesting."

He finally laughed—a deep, rich sound that came from his chest. The familiarity of it caused me to still immediately, and the smile faded from my lips. His laugh hasn't changed. It brought me back to brighter days, when Kylo was...

"...and then I just grab it. You know, you'd just have to see it."

Coming back to the present, I focused on my hands clutching the edge of the counter. I loosen my grip as the sudden ache in my chest subsided. I easily blinked away the tears brimming my eyes.

Thankfully, Ben continued talking. "It took me months to get my TIE Fighter functional again. For a while, I thought I might be stranded out there."

I reached to grab more beans and found the bowl empty. Turning around, I snatched some uncut veggies from Ben's pile. When my arm brushed his elbow, I heard a sharp intake of breath as though I had hurt him.

"Sorry," I apologized, turning back towards my counter. Grabbing a knife, I started cutting an onion in long slices. "You came here in a TIE Fighter?"

"Oh, no," he said, his voice a bit unsteady. "I...I didn't even make it halfway before a New Republic patrol intercepted me. They forced me to dock with their ship."

I felt my jaw go slack. "You were stopped by Rangers? How many?"

"At least twenty," he said, as calm as stone.

Setting my knife down, I whirled around and folded my arms across my chest. He must have sensed my movement because he turned around with a shy smile ghosting his lips. "And then?" I pressed.

"I told them I found it abandoned on my homeworld," he continued.

I narrowed my eyes. "They believed that?"

Ben stuck his hands into his pockets; he seemed a bit unnerved by my sudden attention. I then noticed that he'd chosen all black clothing that day—perhaps a force of habit. "Well, I might have…" He flurried a hand through the air as if to imply he had used the Force. A mind trick?

A surprised noise came from my throat. "Really?"

With a meek nod, he said, "Yeah."

"That's incredible." I was shaking my head in awe. A confrontation with the New Republic was no simple matter; anyone else would've ended up in the brig.

He just shrugged. "They impounded the Fighter but they ended up dropping me off at a spaceport."

"I see." I nodded, staring up at him in a newfound light. He seemed more capable than I had assumed. "To be honest, I didn't know you could do that."

His eyes fell to the ground between us. "My connection to the Force is stronger than ever before," he explained. "I think."

Suddenly, a sound from behind me caused me to jolt. I turned to find my knife gracefully chopping the onion as if someone was holding it. Gasping, I backed away and felt my heel bump into Ben's foot. He laughed, steadying me with a hand on my arm. He quickly jerked his hand away as I gawked at the cutting board. A moment later, the knife gently laid itself down.

"It's unbelievable," I breathed, turning my gaze on him.

Ben placed a hand on the back of his neck and laughed nervously. He glanced away, and then, a serious look entered his eyes. "You used to love the Force," he said quietly. "Have you…?"

Frowning, I shook my head. "Since that day, two years ago—" I breathed in, pushing the memory away immediately. "I cut myself off from it. Completely."

Ben nodded as if he had expected such an answer. He probably already knew. When he looked at me, I saw the regret in his eyes. "I'm sad to hear that."

Feeling uncomfortable, I muttered something about John and Laye being home soon and returned to my station. I felt Ben's eyes on me as I picked up the Force-touched knife. The adrenaline from my shock still lingered in my veins, causing my hand to shake.

"I'm sorry I brought it up," he murmured. I saw him shifting anxiously in my peripheral vision. "I can sense your pain."

I bit my lip against the swell of emotions in my chest. Having someone acknowledge them was surprisingly cathartic. "Thank you, Ben," I whispered.

We didn't speak for a while after that, and the time passed in comfortable silence.

…

After yet another awkward meal, John pulled me aside before going to his room for the night. Laye had already disappeared, while Ben had remained in the kitchen to wash the dishes. John guided me into the front room with a hand between my shoulder blades.

"How are you feeling about...Ben?" he asked. His brow was furrowed; his eyes were scanning my face.

I shrugged under his scrutiny. "I guess I'm still trying to figure him out," I said, my eyes flickering to the figure standing at the sink.

John pulled me deeper into the shadows of the front room, away from the light streaming through the kitchen door. Gripping my arm, John pulled me close to mutter in my ear, "He's still in love with you, you know."

I jerked away from him and looked at his face in surprise. "I don't think you're reading—"

"Lucy, really?" he interrupted, giving me a slight shake.

I brushed his hand away in annoyance. "Stars, John—calm down," I sighed. I knew he only said it because he worried for me, but it troubled me more than anything.

"I just want you to be careful," John said, softening his expression. "You have a...track record with him."

"If you actually talked to him, you'd realize that he's not the same person," I said pointedly. "Everything's fine."

John pursed his lips stubbornly. "Maybe you're right."

"Of course I am." I smiled to reassure him. "Don't worry about me."

"I'll still worry, but…" He gestured absently as if he didn't know how to say what he was thinking. Before turning away, he bent down to place a kiss on my forehead. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, John," I said, watching him walk down the hall to his room.

A/N: Hello ladies and gents, thank you for reading this update! I got back into this series thanks to a Wattpad reader who left a comment on every chapter XD I hope to keep the updates coming so please review! -Scarlet