Today was another Saturday in Chestnut Creek at Augie Doggie's two-floored apartment complex. He and his friend Bernice Houghton were off from school. Nick Vile was looking over his already doomed-to-fail French test questions. Doggie Daddy and Dick Dastardly sat on the Doggie's dinner table together, talking casually.
Visits like this are more often than Nick visiting his own grandmother (which Dick doesn't want to visit in the first place.) There is always this question in Nick's head that doesn't seem to go away. The despicable cheater Dick Dastardly from the Wacky Races, talking friendliness to the mild-mannered father model of all fathers, Doggie Daddy himself? To Augie, it was a bit surprising, but as long Mr. Dastardly doesn't bribe his dear ol' dad, this was rather nice.
But to Nick, how in hell of all people( or animals), was Doggie Daddy, able to passionately discussing whatever the topic was about. It's Dick Milhous Dastardly for Heatter's sake!
"Hold the convo-!" he interrupted. The two men stopped their tracks, one glaring at his nephew while the other's confused. "You old men were friends?!" What does he have to say?
Dastardly did not usually admit that one of his few closest friends was Alexander Doggie. Every time he alluded to him, either the others forget about it or just simply didn't believe him, because of Dick's usual reputation as obviously a "Dastardly". It was even worse considering that Alexander's affliction was on the opposite side of the good and bad spectrum. Even his two goody-two-shoes lovers were oblivious to this.
The tension in the kitchen gets tighter every other second. Poor Dear Ol' Dad and Uncle Dickie were baffled about what was going on. His son and his red-haired friend, who came to visit in the small living room lounging around, were just as confused about Nick's sudden screeching as they were. Then, Dick decided to break the silence.
"Vile, you know better than to interrupt one's conversation" Dastardly growled, emphasizing the "personal life" by air quoting his two purple gloved fingers.
"But Uncle Dickieeeeeee," Nick whined with enough fake innocence that you can see a halo over the teen's head. "I know that's weird, but you never told me that my friend's father is YOUR friend."
"Fair point, Nephew. But, give me one other reasonable reason on why you are so keen on our history," Dastardly said.
"Okay bet: his boy and I are practically brothers mentally," Nick explained, pointing at the green-hooded pup, almost cowered in shame as Bernice patted his back. Doggie Daddy only can just stare with sympathy at his boy. Nick then, lay his right finger to his mustached uncle. "And two, you're a 'Dastardly'".
"This child…" Dick sighed and sulked on his chair...Was going to be the death of him. Then, he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was not very firm nor merely a pat. Alexander, his dear friend, looked at him with his genuinely warm eyes and said, "Let's say, how about giving him-"
"AND US!" The tomboy Bernice butted in.
"And them," he added, indicating his son and the girl. "Without giving too much away."
"Fair,' Nick replies as he abandoned his study guides. That teen's not going to get an "A" in that class anyway. He turned to the doorway, hollering, "Guys, c'mere! Dibs on the chairs!" He sat down next to Dick, much to his annoyance.
The young pup and the child responded to the holler by dashing through the tiny hallway. Next, came Bernice. Finally, came Augie. Bernice slid into the chair like a batter sliding to the base to the last chair of four.
"Score!" she cheered.
Augie was just standing next to his dear ol' dad. He didn't seem to mind, but Doggie Daddy looked at him with pity.
"Augie, my chairless son, bring in your swively chair and sit next to the edge to my side," he offered.
"Yes, my generous father of mine," Augie replied gleefully as he dashed up the stairs to his room. As he comes and brought is a chair, he turns towards us and said, "That's my dear ol' dad who offered that."
"Lucky Stiff," Bernice grumbled.
And Muttley, who has woken up a few minutes ago, snickered as he joins in too.
"So, how does this lovely friendship was born?" Nick asked as he held a spoon in front of Dastardly as a microphone.
"Vile, don't push it," Dastardly gritted underneath his teeth. "We're not treating this as an interview." Augie, Bernice, and Muttley snickered.
Doggie Daddy seems to go along with Nick's imaginary interview. He decided to answer with a question.
"Did'cha know there was once a mall nearby the one and only Jellystone Park?", he asked. The kids and pooch stop snickering.
"A what now?" Bernice questioned.
"A mall, my confused up-to-date child," Doggie Daddy replied. "Couple blocks from the authentic park of Jellystone where Yogi Bear's from. It was a vast building and a paradise for most angsty brats, rats, and teens. The paradise was there since we had nowhere else to hang around on the weekends. We had nothin' else to do than to frolic on the park or spending money on a Salt and Pepper Diner with a jukebox."
"Yeah yeah yeah!" Muttley nodded out of recollecting memories, especially the Salt and Pepper Diner incident. It was a glorious sight to behold.
"Then, that bustling mall arrived in the summer of '95 by the bajillionare Donald Dukington," Dastardly chimed in. He suddenly remembered how the place had a lot of painfully, trendy stores and the spoiled rotten kids (like him). Of course, he even reminded himself how much Yogi and his gang of friends are the pain to his ass at the time.
"The owner sounds like a phony executive," Augie popped in.
"You both like to ramble about a no longer existing capitalist building," Nick said as he cocked his eyebrow in confusion.
"Nicholas Nixon Vile," his uncle said, smirked. "We're just getting started."