~The wolf and the mer are one. Such is the duel nature of the werewolf. To be man or mer in the light of the day, and a savage beast by the light of the moons. Jeziasi was the wolf, and the wolf was Jeziasi. A divide had existed between the two once, but it had been crossed long ago. But the moment the Daedric collar had been snapped across Jeziasi's neck, the divide crashed open and threw the two apart with violent agonizing force. The wolf was thrust into full awakening, the mer dragged down into the depths of dark sleep. A single moment in which they tried to fight it, before being overwhelmed. So very much passed through their minds. How the wolf was born in Jeziasi, how the divide was crossed, and what lead to this nightmare.~
The call of Hircine is answered by many. Some seek out his blessing. Some fall into it by happenstance. Others are called by Hircine himself. Hircine took notice of the Vestige after the plane-meld attempt, the young Bosmer who saved all of Nirn from falling into Molag Bal's clutches. The Bosmer whose past was akin to shards of a nearly forgotten dream who fell into the war because fate and destiny willed it so, never mind the cost that she would pay for it. Such a cost was worth it when all of Nirn was at stake. Hircine's eyes fell upon her after the war was won, at how lost she had become as a result, how desperately she searched for a way to be free. Trapped in the memories of a nightmarish war, no family to return to, no one she held to kin. This lost hunter had more than proved herself as such in Hircine's eyes so he wished to claim her, to offer her the freedom of the hunter if she chose it and so he sent Jeziasi dreams of the moons and running under them powerful and free. Her subconscious responded and with a portal amulet she had been gifted to during the war, she walked in her dreams to Reaper's March as she slept to run under the moons, to seek the freedom she craved so deeply. And when Hircine was sure she was ready he called for one of his hunters and at last spoke to the Vestige.
-Reaper's March - years ago-
Once more Jeziasi's dreams bring her to Reaper's March to run under the moons. Why they keep sending her here, she does not know. But somehow running under the bright full moons lifts the cold that's settled in her since Coldharbour giving her a taste of the freedom she craves, that she has chased all over Tamriel in search of. But this night, the dream changes as something speaks to her.
"Hunter."
Jeziasi starts back and looks around. The voice almost sounds...familiar. As if she's heard it before, or perhaps in a long-forgotten dream.
"Hunter, you have proven yourself. I can grant you the freedom you seek. All you must do is choose it. Run, hunter. Run and you will be free, though such freedom is not without cost."
The world seems to come to a stop as Jeziasi starts to understand just who may be speaking to her. The stories of him are well known among her people. Jeziasi's heart beats faster. She is the Vestige, the hero of Nirn. Running as he commands would...Jeziasi closes her eyes and shudders softly. She had been called a hero, she went down the path that fate decided for her never once regretting it. But the horrors she saw, the nightmarish battles she fought, had eroded her faith, had cast her adrift from all she knew until she felt she had to run. Run from her people, her home, even from her dear friend Raz. She had been wandering around Tamriel and had ended up in Shadowfen of all places. It was there the dreams had started, these strange dreams that promised her the freedom she longed for to the depths of her soul. Jeziasi's hand falls to her belt, to the amulet that had been given to her by a mage. It could open portals, but had limited uses, Jeziasi had never found need to use it. But still, it was nearly depleted. Jeziasi opens her eyes and looks up at the moons. These nights running, she at last realized, had never been dreams. And this question posed to her...was no question at all. To run or not to run, how could she not chase the one thing she had been looking for since the war? The night air seems to shimmer as Jeziasi bolts into the night, the moonlight gracing her skin as the wind blows her hair back. These nights she had thought dreams she felt freer than she had felt in so very long, and all she wants is that freedom to last. To not flee upon waking in the sun's rays, to shed the shackles of memories and past. Yes, it came with a cost, in the end, she would belong to him. But...it is a fate far better than she fears would be at the end of her road. Reborn as the Vestige in Coldharbour, she fears part of her belongs to that vile place. And if she refuses to follow Y'ffre she fears the fate if her people see her falter in some grievous way. And so Jeziasi runs across the moonlight night, the ground of Reaper's March beneath her feet. A sudden howl is the only warning of danger as the hunter sent for her leaps from the side. So sudden and so fast. A flash of silvery fur, the sting of claws and fangs, the coppery scent of blood in the air. Jeziasi crashes to the ground. The last thing Jeziasi sees before darkness takes her is the werewolf standing above her his claws and fangs wet with her blood.
-Hunting Grounds-
Jeziasi wakes to strange sounds and as she opens her eyes to look around, she finds herself in a forest glen with an altar in the middle and even stranger sights surrounding her. A forest that is both like and unlike Nirn. Jeziasi slowly sits up. This is Hircine's Realm, The Hunting Grounds. Jeziasi rises, one hand moving to her shoulder, she can still feel the werewolf's sharp bite but the wound is fully healed.
A flash of movement catches Jeziasi's eye and she turns to see a huge brown and silver wolf stands before the forest's edge, her golden eyes staring at Jeziasi. The wolf huffs at Jeziasi and then turns and runs into the forest. Jeziasi finds herself running after the wolf in a heartbeat, moving faster than she ever has moved before as she chases the wolf through the strange forest. Dashing under tree branches, hurtling around fallen logs, leaping over small streams. The wolf blurs and then Jeziasi is the wolf. The forest opens up to her in a whole new way, the sounds and scents magnified, each captivating in their own right. Jeziasi races through the forest a joyful huff coming from her as the icy cold of Coldharbour washes away under the heat of the beast.
A new scent has Jeziasi's ears perking up and she swerves left heading into a large clearing where a huge mammoth trumpets upon sight at her to warn her back, but Jeziasi's blood is heated to a boiling point and the mammoths' scent floods through her. The battle is fierce, the mammoth's tusks come dangerously close to Jeziasi as she swerves and doges. At last, an opening and Jeziasi's dives under the mammoth's tusks her jaws clamping down on the mammoth's neck cutting through fur and flesh. The mammoth thrashes and at last crashes to the ground in final death throws. Jeziasi instinctively throws her head back and howls and a course of howls greet her back as werewolves stream from the forest toward her and her prey. Jeziasi turns back to the mammoth and her jaws tear into flesh as she feasts with her fellow werewolves. At last with belly full Jeziasi closes her eyes as sleep takes her.
When Jeziasi awakes again she has returned to mer form and is lying on Hircine's alter in the glen. Jeziasi sits up and looks toward the forest, the wolf looks back at her from the shadows. Again the temptation to chase it runs through Jeziasi's body, but a voice pauses her before she can.
"Vestige,"
Jeziasi slowly turns her head to look up at Hircine's statue which graces the alter and in a shimmer of movement it is statue no longer as Hircine stands before her. Jeziasi slowly swallows as she rises to face the Daedric Prince of the Hunt.
"You have proven yourself hunter, and now a choice," Hircine says as his unfathomable eyes look down at Jeziasi. "The icy depths of Coldharbour has tainted you Vestige, clings to you even now. You won your hunt, it is hardly the reward a hunter deserves. Tell me, the memories of your hunt there weigh you down, do they not?"
Jeziasi slowly nods. "Yes Hircine, I..." Jeziasi trails off looking lost. Things she never found out how to put into words, even to Raz.
"You need not say anything, hunter," Hircine tells her. "I saw into your heart and saw what you desire. I will grant you the freedom you seek."
"At a cost," Jeziasi says. Always a cost with Daedric Princes. Why she should not be here, and yet she still decided to run when he told her to run. To come here, against all reason.
"I see the truth in your eyes. You have decided already freedom is worth nearly any cost to you. All I ask is for you to kneel and become one of my wolves. In exchange, you will have the freedom you sought.
Another Prince demanded that of her. To kneel, to submit. A soft growl echos from Jeziasi's throat as she stares up at Hircine.
Hircine laughs at her response. "I am not Molag Bal. The price he asks for power is far harsher and skewered in his favor. You will have your mortal life here on Nirn. Hunt as you please, live as you will. After you will be my wolf, in my wild hunt. A small price to pay."
Jeziasi glances around again at the Hunting Grounds and her eyes once more fall to the wolf, her wolf if she wills it. A mer's lifetime was long indeed and Jeziasi feels oddly at peace here. Perhaps it would not be so very bad for this to be her afterlife, given her fears of such a thing. Jeziasi's eyes move back to Hircine, staring at the Prince once more before kneeling before him. "This is what I want," Jeziasi says. "I will pledge myself to you Lord Hircine, for this freedom." Jeziasi's wolf moves toward her and shimmers before vanishing within.
"The pact is made. Rise hunter," Hircine tells her, and Jeziasi rises. Hircine tilts his head at her and asks her a question, "What would you name your wolf, Jeziasi?" Jeziasi looks at Hircine with confusion in her eyes. "A strange question. Not one I ask of my wolves. But I somehow feel you need to name her, even though you are one and the same." No name comes to Jeziasi and she shakes her head silently and Hircine laughs again, gently. "Very well my hunter. A question for later then." Hircine raises his hand and a swirling blue portal opens beside the altar. "I know the prey you hunt will be worthy of the hunt. But your chosen prey will make your road more difficult than most."
Fire crosses Jeziasi's eyes. "My road has been such since I left my village," Jeziasi says.
"And yet you never run from it, never hide. You hunt the hunters, and now you are mine. Never forget that, and remember you are the hunter. Do not let others hunt you." Hircine tells her and then he shimmers leaving only his statue behind, though it seems follow Jeziasi with watchful eyes.
Jeziasi turns to the portal and steps toward it, pausing to look back at the Hunting Grounds. It was tempting to stay, this place made her blood race and yet oddly enough gave her peace. But it was not yet time to live here. There was the whole of Nirn that awaited her. Jeziasi smiles and turns to enter the portal, returning to Shadowfen.
-Shadowfen-
Back in Shadowfen Jeziasi embraced her newfound freedom. The wolf flowed over her like water and she took to the marsh to hunt the fiercest of beast there. Swarms of deadly Lamia, Kagouti, and even the great Wamasu. At times Jeziasi came near Argonian's and other travelers in Shadowfen but she baid the wolf back. Not prey, never prey. Even if Hircine saw no line, and thought all of Nirn was to be hunted, Jeziasi had her line. Her Prince had given her leave to hunt and live as she would, for all her mortal life, after all. And if she only chose to hunt the beasts of Nirn, then that is what she would do.
As Jeziasi explored her wolf and the new world it had opened up for her, she found more and more that Shadowfen felt like home. The Argonian's was fascinating to her, most were so open and uncomplicated. It is true Jeziasi stayed mostly to Shadowfen's wilds, but she made visits to Stormhold and Hissmir for supplies and to keep a connection to something other than the wolf's world. Soon she bought a house in the middle of Shadowfen and hired Tends-To-Trees to watch over it when she was away. If Tends-To-Trees thought her strange, she never made any mention of it. How long Jeziasi would have remained in Shadowfen before she felt the need to wander, is something she never found out... for destiny called to her once more.
-Vvardenfell-
"Hero, I know,"
Jeziasi turns to regard Naryu, the Morag Tong assassin she had met briefly during the war when the allegiances met to speak of an assault on Coldharbour and had run into again here when fate brought her to the shores of Vvardenfell. "Know what?" Jeziasi asks and then a frown crosses her face as she sees the truth in Naryu's eyes.
Naryu folds her arms across her chest and gives Jeziasi a look. "You thought you could hide it from one of the Morag Tong, Jeziasi?" Naryu says and then seeing Jeziasi's expression Naryu shakes her head. "Oh hero, banish that look from your eyes. As long as you don't get fleas in the bed it won't bother me at all." Naryu uncrosses her arms as her graceful fingers stroke her knife. "I hate fleas."
A mischief smile crosses Jeziasi's face. "I do not have fleas!," Jeziasi says. "But I could find some to roll in and bring them back to bed."
Naryu walks towards Jeziasi. "So you would do such a thing to one such as me? Oh, you are a naughty wolf, aren't you?" Naryu says as she halts in front of Jeziasi, the two staring into each other's eyes intensely.
"We...really should find out," Jeziasi says with a laugh.
Jeziasi knew she was on Vvardenfell on a mission, once more called for Nirn and in truth, she had little problems with what they asked of her. Someone was taking Vivec's energy, someone she could hunt. But along with the promise of a new hunt, Vvardenfell had also come with unexpected distractions. Once perhaps Jeziasi would have ignored such distractions, but her newfound freedom had set lose the wild within her. Why would she not have it all? Hunt the hunters, and be slightly distracted along the way? Jeziasi was waiting on information to continue her hunt after all, and Naryu was in need of help with her charge Veya. And in truth Jeziasi had been alone for some time. Being with someone...was nice. Naryu was charming as well as dangerous, more than a match for Jeziasi's wolf. And Veya was young, and in so much need of help. Lost after her brother's death, Naryu was doing her best to train her and take the edges of rage and despair from her. It was easy to be with them. But in the end, it all went so very wrong.
The rain pours from the sky as Naryu and Jeziasi face each other in the storm's wrath. Regret, fury, despair all reflected in Naryu's eyes. The darkness had overcome Veya and she had set on a path of murder that threatened them all, and more besides. Veya had become the threat, become what should be hunted. And after the brutal battle Jeziasi had fought by Naryu's side against Veya, Naryu had turned to Jeziasi and asked her what she should do and Jeziasi had answered as the hunter in her told her to. Kill Veya to stop all this. To stop the Molag Tong from coming after Naryu for Veya's murderous actions. In Jeziasi's eyes, Veya was lost, and when she woke she would continue this madness. Naryu's eyes had turned so very cold and she had demanded Jeziasi leave, that she alone take dagger to Veya and end it. And so Jeziasi had left and stood in the rain, wondering how it all could have gone so wrong. How one could become so lost they would descend into this. Naryu had come out alone and stood in the rain with Jeziasi, the two knowing this had broken whatever fleeting dream had been between them, for Veya had been a part of that and now she was gone.
"Oh, hero..." Naryu says with regret deep in her voice, and yes pain though she tries to hide it. "It is best you leave me. I'll be fine in time and you have more important things to hunt."
The assassin puts up the strongest front but in this short time, Jeziasi had come to know Naryu intimately enough to know the depths of pain in her heart. Naryu had come to love Veya like a daughter. To know this was the end...Jeziasi knew pain, but not this flavor of it. True, she had cared for Veya, but not in the same way Naryu did. "I'll come back after," Jeziasi says.
"No, hero you won't," Naryu says and she moves closer to Jeziasi as she trails one hand over Jeziasi's face. "We both know it's better this way. And we both know you are a lone wolf. This was a brief pause. Eventually, you would have run off on your own or grown to hate what kept you bound."
"That's..." Jeziasi starts to say and then trails off as Naryu interrupts her protest.
"Not true? Oh, hero, you cannot see it can you? You think you found what you seek with your wolf, your precious freedom, but you're still running, still searching. And...we were not what you sought. If..." Naryu trails off looking lost for a moment before continuing. "If we had been what you wanted, needed, you would have told me to spare Veya and run off with us to keep her safe, to keep us safe."
Jeziasi starts back from Naryu. "I cannot give up my hunt," Jeziasi says. "I will not abandon Nirn for..." Jeziasi trails off and looks helplessly at Naryu.
Naryu shakes her head sadly. "I know. For you, Nirn is more important than any one person. You never loved us as you love Nirn, as you love freedom. You saw her as a threat. I know she was. I just..." Naryu turns from Jeziasi. "Leave, hero. Run."
Jeziasi turns from Naryu unable to say another word. With a growl the wolf bursts from her and she runs into the wilds of Vvardenfell. Running once more from those she thought she cared for, from pain.
-Some days later-
Jeziasi paces back and forth. Days, it would be days before the Ashlanders had information on her hunt. Jeziasi growls softly. It had taken far too long as is, given her too much time to get lost in distractions. A pang of hurt crosses Jeziasi's face before turning to anger as Jeziasi's thoughts turn to Naryu. Jeziasi had run, just as Naryu knew she would, and somehow as she waited for more information got tangled up Telvanni and a deceitful Argonian called Sun-In-Shadows. Jeziasi at last sits down on the ground as her eyes close memories of the past few days crossing her mind. In that mine with slavers dead around her, Jeziasi had been ready to kill Sun-in-Shadows as well had Eoki not leaped in her way. Sun-in-Shadows had sought to keep him enslaved because she claimed she loved him. And despite it all, Eoki still loved her, though he parted from her with the rest of the freed slaves for freedom in the end. A frown crosses Jeziasi's face. Naryu had been the same, for she knew killing Veya was the best option, Veya was utterly lost to the dark but when she asked Jeziasi to choose, her eyes had hoped Jeziasi would tell her to save Veya against all reason. Veya was a threat to many and still...Naryu loved Veya enough to forget that, to risk too much. How could anyone put love over everything else? Over reason and freedom, over Nirn? Perhaps...Love was not something Jeziasi understood. Perhaps it was beyond a hunter, beyond a wolf. Perhaps it was something that was best left for others. Was it something anyone even needed?
Jeziasi's eyes slowly open. Her thoughts had not calmed her much. She should be waiting at the Ashlander camp, that was best. But everything that had happened here in Vvardenfell had deeply unsettled Jeziasi. Had caused pain and suffering, and caused fury to rise. Jeziasi's eyes move to the distance. Why she has chosen this spot. It is one of the areas Jeziasi had scouted out as she waited. Dres Slavers brought slaves for the Telvanni right under the noses of the Ebonheart pack. Jeziasi's eyes stare down below her as she complicates something she should never do. Jeziasi drops her head. "Wolf, what should I do?" Jeziasi whispers. Her instincts and rage call to her to hunt them. To...to set upon them and murder them all. Jeziasi closes her eyes again. The wolf is her and hers, but still, a divide seems to exist between her and her wolf. Hunt or be hunted, it should be so simple. But to the mer, anything but. Emotions got in the way, duty got in the way. Jeziasi at last rises and turns from the slaver camp, she will report them and then leave to hunt her proper prey, not these. But as Jeziasi turns to go a cry from below has her turning. A slave...no an Argonian being hurt.
Pain...Jeziasi knows this very well. And in a flash of fur and fangs the mer vanishes to leave the werewolf in her place. The wolf hunts their desired prey. Not to hunt, not to feast, but in rage. With a howl she sets upon the Dunmer tearing them apart and feasting upon their flesh after, sending the Argonian's fleeing from the beast that is their salvation. At last full, she curls up among the carnage and darkness takes hold for a brief amount of time.
The wolf vanishes back into the Mer and Jeziasi at last wakes amongst the carnage and as she looks around with wild eyes she knows the truth, that she dived down deep into pain and rage and this was the result. Mutilated bodies feasted upon, blood soaking into the sands. Jeziasi throws her head to the sky and screams and the scream turns into a howl and then all is nothing more than a fevered dream coated in crimson.
When at last the wolf leaves Jeziasi finds herself near the Ashlander village. The memories of the past few days are a blur of savagery. Jeziasi sinks to the ashy ground and bows her head shaking. Not once since she kneeled for Lord Hircine had she lost control. Not once. Now? How many had she killed? Jeziasi closes her eyes and in her mind's eye, the wolf looks back at her with the merciless eyes of a hunter. "This is not what I wanted!" Jeziasi screams at the wolf. The wolf's golden eyes look into Jeziasi's crystal eyes, the answer clear. This is what Jeziasi's rage wanted and so the Dunmer became her prey.
-Vivec City, After-
Another ceremony calling Jeziasi a hero, she who let Veya die, she who lost control and killed those she was to save. And even now, control was eroding. The freedom Jeziasi had sought and now she had little control over the wolf or herself. How was she to continue the hunt, for the hunt once more was a Daedric Prince himself, if not more than one. The greatest of hunts, but how could she be the hunter, the hero they needed as she was now? On the verge of losing control, having murdered Dunmer on the shores of Vvardenfell even as she sought to save them from Clavicus Vile's hound Barbas, that would have resulted in utter destruction had she failed. Jeziasi pushes her thoughts to the side for later, least they show on her face. Least she give away things she must not give away.
After the ceremony Lord Vivec approaches her and not for the first time does Jeziasi wonder if he knows. But why call her a savior if he did? Jeziasi turns her eyes to him as he stops before her.
"Do you truly understand what you will be facing in the near future?" Lord Vivec asks her.
"I hunt the hunters," Jeziasi tells him. "If it is Daedric Princes which threaten Nirn then it is them that I will hunt." Jeziasi narrows her eyes. "I have hunted Molag Bal in his realm so I have little issue with hunting Clavicus Vile and any aligned with him."
Lord Vivec crosses his arms behind his back as he regards Jeziasi's words. "Mortals can pay a heavy price for interfering in the Gods affairs," Lord Vivec tells her. "They may someday come for you for your actions."
"Let them try," Jeziasi says.
-Shadowfen-
As Jeziasi paused to look out upon the marsh thoughts swirl in her head. Of Vvardenfell, of Shadowfen, and the strange Argonian she met upon returning home. Jeziasi closes her eyes letting the sounds of Shadowfen wash over her. The peace Shadowfen brought Jeziasi...it was hard to put into words but somehow the marsh felt almost like home to her. Being surrounded by all the plants and creatures of it and the Argonian's. But upon returning from Vvardenfell even this peace hardly seemed to reach her. All that had happened there, the eroding sense of any control. The simple fact that Jeziasi had become a monster upon the shores of Vvardenfell for she let the pain and rage consume her, let the wolf overwhelm her to kill those she perhaps should not have. As Jeziasi heads into the marsh, she knows she needs control to hunt the hunters, to stop Clavicus Vile and whomever he had aligned himself with. But how eluded her. The wolf offered no solutions, for to the wolf there was no loss of control. There was hunt or be hunted, and those who died under fangs and claws were nothing more than prey. Jeziasi knew that would be Hircine's view as well, and she would not let him think she was a helpless pup, would not show such weakness to him. And returning to what had once been her home was not an option either. There would be no telling what they would do if they found out she made a pact with a Daedric Prince, that she had become what they would consider a monster. Not even her old friend Raz would understand this, understand her choices. Jeziasi, at last, opens her eyes and moves toward the marsh, pausing to wonder what would have happened if she had gone with that strange Argonian. She had been tempted... but for once she could not judge if she should trust him or not. Her emotions, her lack of control. So Jeziasi decided not to, for she could not trust herself at present.
After returning from the hunt Jeziasi walks up the hill to her home but suddenly pauses at the entrance, her hand on the door as a sense of foreboding flows through her. Someone had been here, someone who was not Tends-To-Trees. Jeziasi growls softly as she pushes open the door her eyes moving to every corner of the cozy room. No one is here but an unfamiliar scent lingers and Jeziasi's eyes fall to a note pinned to the wall with a knife. Jeziasi stalks to the wall and rips the note down staring at it. On the front is a black handprint and on the back a simple note.
~We have heard of your work in Vvardenfell. It lacks control, but the murderous desire is to be appreciated. We can offer you much. Travel to Anvil and make your arrival known by murdering one of its citizens.~
Jeziasi stares at the note for long moments before turning it back around and she traces the hand print with one finger understanding just who had contacted her and given her a way out. Who better to learn how to control the uncontrollable killing frenzy than assassins? Jeziasi suddenly growls and throws the note down turning her back on it. Again a crossroads. Again a choice she should never contemplate. Jeziasi stalks the room and at last, falls into an uneasy sleep on her mat in the middle of the room.
The wolf sits and stares at her in the dark. Jeziasi stares back. "You were to give me freedom, not this uncontrollable blood-lust!" Jeziasi growls. "Why? I have given so very much, why can I not have this one thing?"
Again the wolf only speaks with her golden eyes. ~/~You need more than this.~/~
"What? What do I need but freedom? Freedom to hunt, to just be?" Jeziasi says.
The answer in the wolf's eyes, always so clear but always so frustrating. ~/~You will not know what you need until you understand the need.~/~
Jeziasi starts to growl then falls silent staring at the wolf in defeat. "How is want and need so different?" Jeziasi whispers although the wolf has no answers for her this time. "I do not even know your name or why you need one if we are one," Jeziasi says.
The wolf stands and huffs as if to say, are we?
-The Northeastern edge of Cyrodiil-
In the end, Jeziasi took the darker path, for she had to be ready to hunt when she was called again. Control was not optional. Jeziasi had to get control no matter the cost, by any means necessary. Even with an act of unspeakable murder. As the blood soaked into the floor of Dibella's church Jeziasi had fled into the night, but she had not gotten far before the summons from the Dark Brotherhood came, for they had been watching. The deed was done, and there was no going back so the Dark brotherhood became her family and she trained with them, hunted with them learning control over her blood fury, her fiery emotions that had gotten the best of her with all that had happened during the war and since. But the final touch of control was just out of reach... until the day the Dark Brotherhood sent her on a mission to Cyrodiil. A contract had come in, the target an Imperial vampire hunter by the name of Dranitus Vanicci who lived in the often snowy region of Northeastern Cyrodiil deep in the wilds away from any of the towns. But it had not gone as planned. Somehow Dranitus Vanicci had found out about the contract and had friends waiting for her and they sprung their trap as she came for Dranitus Vanicci setting on her from all directions. Once more Jeziasi felt the blood frenzy sweep over her, the wolf rising to savage her foes. But these were hunters that hunted the monsters of the world, vampires, werewolves, and more. They quickly switched tactics once they realized the assassin was a werewolf and Jeziasi eventually was overcome by wolfsbane laced weapons and fell to the snowy ground. As the hunters came to kill her darkness took her.
Again the dark, again the wolf stares at Jeziasi, seeking an answer. At last, Jeziasi has one. "Pack. Is that what I need?" Jeziasi whispers.
~/~You cannot be a lone wolf forever.~/~ The wolf seems to tell her. ~/~But the Dark Brotherhood...are they truly your pack in this life?~/~
Jeziasi thinks back to the weeks spent with the Dark Brotherhood. Learning they were more than monsters, learning they could be family. "Why would they not?" A trace of loneliness crosses Jeziasi's eyes. "Who else would have me? I have run far from home, and I no longer can return even if I wished it." Jeziasi falls silent as her eyes stare into the wolf's golden eyes. "Something else. I am missing something else."
The wolf dips her head. ~/~Yes but that is a matter for another time. We are about to lose everything. The hunters will kill us, and we will be with our Prince far too soon.~/~
"I am not ready yet. I cannot let them." Jeziasi says with a growl. The hunt awaits, she has gone to such lengths to gain control for when she is called once more.
The wolf seems to smile. The divide is nearly closed.
Jeziasi's eyes widen and she reaches out with her hand to the wolf, resting it upon her head. "Every day that passes, I forget more and more of the small village I grew up in," Jeziais whispers. "When I woke in Coldharbour after being killed, the memories of that place were more of a dream than memories. I have tried to hold onto them, but they slip away. For that Jeziasi did die when Mannimarco slit her throat for Molag Bal and the Plane-meld. The Jeziasi that came after was what was needed, what was called. This Jeziasi, me. Just as you are me as well." Jeziasi gives the wolf a small sad smile. "I thought I accepted all this, but some part of me clung onto something else. A nearly forgotten past, or the notion that I am still the hero that went into Coldharbour to fight Molag Bal. So much has changed me and I had no say in it. But Lord Hircine, this. This I had a say in. I need to accept all of it." Jeziasi presses her forehead against the wolf, her hands buried into the soft scruff. "Why you need a name, I still do not know." Jeziasi whispers into the wolf's fur. "My home was surrounded by trees with heavy branches. I felt safe there before my parents died. I remember that much." Jeziasi pauses and then moves back to look the wolf in her...their golden eyes. "Duskhollow," Jeziais whispers. "For when you need it, my wolf." Jeziasi closes her eyes. "I understand now that we are one and it is not you that drives my rage, but me. My memories, my emotions, but I have control now and we...I will hunt."
Jeziasi's golden eyes bolt open and she leaps up and howls starting the hunter's back. "You thought you would hunt me?" Jeziasi growls and then all is crimson upon the snow as she surges with a renewed burst of energy, with utter control and understanding over her wolf. The hunters have little chance and soon are in so very many pieces upon the snow. Jeziasi's head turns as the scent of her true prey fills her nose. Dranitus Vanicci thinks to flee. Flee from her? Jeziasi huffs in werewolf laughter and surges across the snow to the trees beyond. It is a simple matter to catch up with her prey and end him beneath her jaws, stopping to feast upon him, the chill of the night banished by the heat of his blood and flesh, and the wolf's blood coursing through her.
-Clockwork City-
The wolf had been right. The Dark Brotherhood was not her pack. In the end, she had been called again to her hunt, and they let her go, for The Night Mother had told Speaker Terenus that what was coming would threaten the souls that belonged to Sithis. It had been harder to leave than she thought, but there had still been no hesitation in Jeziasi as she did as bid and left, returning to her solitary life and the hunt she craved.
As Jeziasi waits for Sotha Sil she stares out at the barren land all around her. This place made her fur crawl. A place of strange machines and stranger creatures. Alive, yet not alive as she understood life. To think that most who found their way here never could leave. Jeziasi was sure she would go mad if she had to stay in this place. No true trees or plants, no true animals. She nearly chipped fangs as she pursued her hunt here. And to find it was Nocturnal, yet another Daedric Prince. A crafty smile crosses Jeziasi's face. Not one, not even two, but three Daedric Princes in league with each other. A hunt like no other and she had already beaten them twice. Summerset would be the next land she hunted, and she would succeed in her hunt there as well. Jeziasi stills as soft footsteps ring out on the ground and she turns to face Sotha Sil.
Sotha Sil looks at Jeziasi seriously. "I know what you are, Jeziasi. Many would find it strange that you follow his star. That you dove into a place without stars as well."
Jeziasi's eyes narrow as she softly growls. "I am a hunter," Jeziasi says, "I have chosen to hunt those who hunt Nirn. That should be enough for you, enough for the world."
Sotha Sil raises one eyebrow then turns from her, hands crossed in back. "Many you protect from the hunters would not trust you if they knew. They would even fear you. And yet, you do not care."
"I am free, and I am who I should be," Jeziasi says. "I do not care if they call me Vestige, hero. I do not care if they call me monster if they should ever learn my truths."
Sotha Sil is silent for a few long moments before speaking once more, "Only those who will not betray your truths will learn of them, Jeziasi. And in truth only you can betray your truths in the end." Sotha Sil motions with one hand before folding it behind his back for Jeziasi to go and she turns and leaves. Sotha Sil is utterly still for long moments until her presence is no longer felt and then a frown crosses his face. He should be able to see the inevitability of it all, but when it came to Jeziasi pieces were missing from his sight. And her path would vanish utterly from his site in the near future. A puzzle for another time, however. The current crisis threatened all of Nirn, after all. And he had things to set right in his absence.
-Near the shores of Summerset-
Jeziasi stands on the side of the ship, hands clasped tightly to the rail as it sails away from Summerset. To hunt the hunters. Jeziasi never once thought what it would cost her. Coming here to this magnificent land and meeting old friends. Razum-dar, Darien. And... Jeziasi closes her eyes. Even Veya, though Veya had been utterly lost to the shadows and Nocturnal's sway. And in the end... Jeziasi's nails dig into the boat as the wind sweeps over her. In the end, all of them had been lost. Darien and a new unsuspected ally and friend Leythen had given their lives to stop Nocturnal. And Jeziasi had killed Veya, for she would not stop, and stood in the way of the hunt. Stood in the way of Nocturnal who would have erased all of existence, ending life on Nirn as everyone knew it. The hunt had been won, and Jeziasi was victorious. But victory tasted far too bitter. Jeziasi slowly opens her eyes. As for Razum-Dar... he knew her truths, somehow and yet would not betray them, as long as she never hunted in Dominion territory. It was best they had been parted again. Jeziasi ran on a different path from Raz, and always would. "Why should I ever have a pack?" Jeziasi whispers to the sea. "All I do is lose those I care for...or I run from them. Pack, and whatever else I need... I do not want it if this is the pain it causes!" Jeziasi growls softly as her eyes stare intently into the distance. "Need, want. What I want is to forget all this pain." Jeziasi's eyes narrow. If she could run from it she would. In a heartbeat, no matter the cost of it all.
-Shadowfen-
Jeziasi returns home and finds the strange Argonian waiting for her. Again he asks her to hunt with him. To be with him, for a time. The world seems to stop as Jeziasi looks at his ebony scales, his eyes that refuse to stay in her mind. Inside her the wolf howls. The wolf senses this is a dangerous hunter and it sets her bestial instincts off. But still, Jeziasi reaches for his hand. The why of it is she wants to run again. Run away from the loneliness, from the pain and despair of loss. The possible danger, the slight foreboding, it seems trivial right now. How can any harm come with going with him? She is the stronger hunter. Even if he turns on her she will hunt him and rend him to pieces, nothing he could do could possibly hurt her in the end.
-Three weeks later-
Jeziasi pauses at the door to her house and slowly sinks into the jungle plants that grow all around it and lowers her head into her hands and whimpers softly, the sound more wolf like than mer. She knew that hunting with Swims-in-Silence would not last forever, that it was temporary. But when she woke to find him gone it had shaken her. No, it had more than shaken her. Something... memories flashing through her mind, her instincts had gone utterly wild and the wolf had burst from her and she ran home in blind panic. Only when she raced up the hill and entered the yard surrounding her house did the panic fade to allow her to return to her mer form. Jeziasi softly shakes. "What is wrong with me?" Jeziasi whispers. The past three weeks had been almost like a dream. Memories of Summerset, the pain inside of her seemed nearly forgotten and Swims-in-Silence had been by her side constantly. They hunted together, slept together, done everything together, until he left as she knew he would in the end. And when she had woken up to find herself alone... Jeziasi lowers her hands and they dig into the dirt. Why did strange memories flash in her head? Each night they fell asleep together and woke when the sun rose. But now Jeziasi's memories are telling her something altogether different. Swims-in-Silence getting up each night after she had fallen asleep, and she heard him and woke as well...and then he bid her to sleep and she fell back asleep each and every time. "Not what happened," Jeziasi growls. "It makes no sense." With a push, she stands up and moves to the doorway to her house, and puts her hand against it. Back at home, away from the strange dream that was Swims-in-Silence, the memories, and pain well inside her once more. "How far must I run to escape all this?" Jeziasi snarls. "How far?"
The answer was inside her house. A Daedric Prince, whom she owed a favor to for helping them with Nocturnal in Summerset. Clavicus Vile had called in his favor. For her to return with him to his realm in Oblivion. To explore it, and other realms if she chose. She could come back when she wanted...but why would she? Nirn held so many memories, so much pain, and truths she should know, but refused to think about. And so she had crossed into Oblivion leaving Nirn behind. It would be three long years until she was pulled back to Nirn, and destiny again.
The memories fade as Duskhollow awakes from her sleep by her son's door. The memories are Jeziasi's, all that she holds. Jeziasi had fallen into a nightmare made by a single choice, but in doing so she found what she needed, what she ran to, what she sought without full knowing of what it was until she had it. Pack, and family. Even if it turned out like this for now Jeziasi is beyond reach, sleeping perhaps forevermore. All that is left is Duskhollow, whose nature is pure wolf without a trace of the Mer.
Duskhollow knows something is missing. That she is not whole, that part of her is very far away. Duskhollow whines softly but when no answer is forthcoming Duskhollow lays her head on her paws again waiting for her pack to wake for the hunt. That, at least she understands. It is a wolf's desire to hunt, to protect her pack. If something is missing and cannot be called to, then the wolf will continue on without it. Even if it makes her fur prickle in an emotion that is not quite hers. Even if...somehow she knows her son, their pack leader is responsible for this, and that he is something altogether different then he was before. But there is no returning to what was, only what is. The now exists for the wolf, past and future belonged to the Mer and only shadows of such remain, and are already fading in Duskhollow's mind.