Chapter 15- A Different Perspective
A/N: Well, I'm back after a hiatus of an entire year plus! That is not excitement that is shame by the way... I used to wonder how it was possible for people to leave stories to ferment in the basement of . I had to go and find or recover lost stories/chapters as well because they had expired in my doc manager. Sad state of affairs to say the least. In this chapter, we bring Mei into the gaang and prepare for some other soon-to-be arrivals. Sozin's Comet is upon us but I thought I'd try to attempt a little Kataang action since Zuko is happily taken. Of course, let me know what you think especially my newest appreciators of this story. I will try to get back to updating stories I know I haven't finished and Happy holiday to those who will be celebrating this week.
Disclaimer: "If it's not yer business, then stay out of it ye nosy bastards!"-Mei Wei of the Earth Kingdom Colony of Yu Dao.
Chapter 15
True to her word, Mei took a back seat from trying to run the beach house the way she ran the inn. She did manage to work her way into the meal rotation after the first time she took over for Carla once her Braxton-Hicks contractions or as they called it in the Earth Kingdom, Preparation Pains began. No one dared tell Mei she was doing too much after that meal because to the children it was perhaps the best food they had ever had and they very much desired to have her make more like it. Mei was a master of cuisine and tea. She would prepare vegetarian dishes for the entire group just as easily as a meal containing meat and no one could tell the difference. Everything was still just as good and flavorful. Aang even began gaining some weight because he ate everything Mei put before him. "Mei, I know you're from Yu Dao and your family probably misses you, but I hope you stay with us forever. I don't think I've ever eaten this well even with the monks at the temple," Aang declared. Mei beamed with satisfaction. "Well, that's a high compliment if I've ever received one! Thank you, Avatar Aang. You are welcome in my inn anytime. You can eat until your heart is content," she added placing another healthy serving on his plate.
Katara gave a small smile as she began collecting the used dishes to wash. If Mei could create such a great meal, then she could at least wash the dishes. Mei placed a hand on Katara's shoulder stopping her in her tracks. "Oh no, young lady. I think you need to go outside and enjoy the sunset for a change. You made breakfast and lunch and you already did the laundry. I've got help..." She said eyeing Sokka who had nowhere to run from her gaze though he tried not to make eye contact. Sokka gave a long mournful whine while Toph rolled her sightless eyes at him. She got up and collected the dishes while Sokka began filling the large sink with water. Zuko did them a small favor and lit the boiler underneath the sink to warm the water. He then offered his arm to Carla and next to a surprised Katara who took it warily. She got the feeling that Mei, Carla, and Zuko had already planned this moment.
Aang watched with wide eyes and a full mouth as the trio now walked out into the courtyard in the direction of the beach. He wanted to go too but the call of his plate was just too strong, and he decided to finish his meal so as not to offend Mei by leaving the good food behind. He would just catch up with them afterward. Zuko veered from the usual path to the beach and took a way that gradually edged higher. Eventually, the path opened to a clearing and a cliff that overlooked the sea and the setting sun. Katara gasped at the vista shocked and embarrassed that she didn't know the place even existed as long as she had been on the island. It was beautiful! "Wow," she whispered shielding her eyes from the bright yellow sun that she usually never saw unless she was practicing waterbending with Aang. Carla and Zuko smiled knowing that Katara never thought to take time for herself. The trio sat in silent awe on a blanket that was suspiciously already laid out on the grass and sand and watched the slow, blazing orange descent of the sun below the ocean horizon. A sea breeze blew gently and Katara closed her eyes appreciatively. "Thank you," she said quietly breaking the silence. Zuko gave her shoulder a gentle pat and Carla pulled her from the side into a sisterly hug. Katara leaned her head on Carla's as they continued to watch the sun complete its routine for the day. Zuko built a small fire to help them keep warm since the nights on the beach were cooler without the sun to warm the air.
As they got comfortable around the fire Zuko looked over at Katara and asked. "So, when are you going to tell Aang how you feel about him?" Caught in the middle of a swallow Katara inhaled sharply and began choking on her own spit. Carla gave her three swift and heavy-handed hits to the back as she worked the rest of the saliva out of her windpipe. Katara glared at Carla with the hardest look of betrayal. "You promised you wouldn't say anything!" she groused. Zuko laughed as if he had just heard the funniest joke ever told. "My wife didn't tell me anything. It doesn't take a scientist to see that you and my pupil are both highly distracted when the other is around, but I'm not surprised by it," he said. Katara looked at Carla with a sheepish grimace. "Sorry?" she said softly. Carla rolled her eyes. "Whatever, chica." And laughed at her little sister's antics. Katara smirked and stared into the fire gently. "I really didn't think Aang liked me like that. He's always trying to go explore and play." Zuko raised an eyebrow. "With whom, Katara? Aang has never asked Sokka or Toph to my knowledge. He's only been interested in hanging with one person." He said with a slight smirk. Katara's mouth dropped open. "What?" Katara said flabbergasted. Zuko and Carla hummed in affirmation together.
At that moment a strange bird called overhead and Zuko stood up. "Well Katara, you're welcome to sit out here a little longer if you like. LaLa looks like she's about to fall over and I could turn in a little early too. The trail is pretty easy to follow back down to the house." Katara looked at her friends and smiled grateful that they thought to give her a special moment all for herself. "I think I would like to enjoy this breeze a little longer. Thanks a lot, you two. I'm really glad you guys care about me like this." She said. The couple beamed with joy. "Any time you want to have a moment to yourself just follow the path to the right and it will bring you up to this area. Enjoy it. You deserve it." Zuko said with an unreadable look. Katara got the feeling they were up to something again but before she could question it, Zuko helped his heavily pregnant wife up from the ground and held her arm in his as they began the slow walk back to the beach house. He lit a small fire in his free hand. Katara smiled as the light got fainter in the path and turned her attention back to the sea.
Katara timed her breathing with the ebb and flow of the sea and relaxed to the point she was completely unaware of her surroundings. The sounds of the sea, the birds, and the breeze became one. Soft and gentle footfalls landed behind her. Katara had her eyes closed and was enjoying the natural music of the waves against the rocks when she felt a hand on her shoulder. With a scream, she quickly ducked out of the stance and held the intruder firm with her blood bending. Katara blanched when she saw the shocked and panicked look on Aang's face. She immediately released him her eyes blown wide. "Oh, my Gods, Aang! You startled me... I'm so sorry," she gasped holding her hands to her mouth. Aang stood stunned. He wasn't as concerned at the fact that Katara was startled as the fact that she used a dark art she promised she wouldn't use ever because of its danger. "You…blood bent me," he said with a mixture of horror and disappointment. His voice barely registered above the intensifying crash of the waves.
He shook his head and backed away slowly. "Katara, you promised me that you wouldn't use that anymore. I thought we agreed it was too dangerous! What if…?" he cut his words short and shook his head again. He frowned as if he swallowed something foul and turned for the path. He was so undone he forgot he could fly and just wanted to get away from Katara at that moment. As he turned to leave Katara called out. "Aang wait! Aang, it was a reflex. I'm really sorry! I didn't…" her lip trembled as he continued walking tuning her out. A sob escaped from Katara's mouth. She didn't mean to do it and she didn't know how to fix this. Katara really hadn't blood-bent since the Hama situation because she learned against her will, but now that she had the knowledge it was instinctual. Katara collapsed to the ground on her knees her sobs wracking her small frame. She knew now that things would be different between them and whatever could have been was gone for good. The thought of losing Aang's friendship only made her cry harder.
Aang stormed into the house blowing past his friends in the kitchen who were having a cup of tea before bed. Toph picked up on his heartrate and knew that whatever happened on the cliff he was pissed. She felt for Katara and sensed her still on the cliff. She felt her erratic beat. Katara was not OK. "What the hell happened?" she said more to herself than her companions. Sokka's big brother antenna raised immediately. "What do you mean? What's going on Toph?" He asked deceptively calm. Toph put her hands up. "Calm down Rodeo Joe. I don't think it's what you're thinking, but I just know Katara needs someone ASAP." Zuko stood up. "Ok, I'll go. I'll at least get her back to the house." He said quietly. Mei Wei shook her head. "I think it'd be better if I go. Whatever happened between them might need a woman's touch, no offense your highness." She advised. Zuko smiled. "None taken. Alright, I'll go have a chat with Air Boy…" he said sighing as if this was not the first time he's ever had to do it. Sokka stood up to follow him. "Yeah, maybe I should go too." He said casually picking up his boomerang. Zuko put up his hand and stopped him from walking forward. "Yeah….Um, No. Wait until we get back before you start waging war against your allies, Sokka. Toph now would be an excellent time to distract your best friend." He said as he walked down the hallway to the Avatar's bedroom. Toph grinned and Sokka raised his eyebrows. "I'm calm, Toph! I'm calm." He said hurriedly. Toph cackled. "I know. I wasn't going to stop you anyway. I know a great spot in the house where we can listen in…" she said her desire for subterfuge greater than making sure her friend wasn't on a vengeance streak for his sister.
Sokka grinned widely. "You see, this is why we're friends, Toph. Let's go." He said lowering his voice to a whisper. In Aang's room, both Zuko and Aang sat in silence. Whatever happened had Aang in a deep state of anger and disappointment. He was staring out his window breathing in through his nose and out of his mouth as if trying to meditate the memories away. Zuko was surprisingly patient and waited for Aang to speak first. "She blood-bent me." Aang said simply. Zuko's eyes bucked. Though he hadn't gotten to see it firsthand since he and Katara never had their "field trip" he knew it wasn't a joke and was probably terrifying. "What happened?" Zuko asked the concern heavy in his voice. Aang looked as if he could cry. "She was so peaceful sitting there in front of the fire and I didn't want to break the moment for her, so I came behind her quietly and just touched her shoulder. She just freaked out and blood bent me. I mean who else would it have been? There is no one else but us on this island and she just lost it." he said frowning and shaking his head. Zuko sighed. He understood and thought briefly of the honeymoon debacle with a dislocated shoulder.
People who have endured multiple traumas don't need a rational reason to freak out. A look, a word, a touch could be a memory that wasn't fully processed or dealt with. Katara could have had something happen to her when she was completely defenseless and now she had all the skills she needed to make someone regret trying to hurt her. She would defend herself no matter what came at her. It wasn't about being rational, but it was a reality. Though Aang was traumatized from realizing his people were gone, he never had to watch or endure the suffering his friends have. Zuko remembered his uncle calling Katara's situation something like being "triggered" or "mortar shocked." It happened to soldiers after their first battle or an exceptionally brutal one. It happened to Zuko. Sometimes it doesn't matter if you're in a safe place or a safe state of mind. Someone who has lived through trauma can be triggered at any moment, but now how would he explain this to Aang?
Zuko sighed deeply. "Aang…I don't think Katara intended to hurt you. It would seem reasonable to think that if you are in a safe place you shouldn't have to worry about danger—" "Exactly! She didn't' have anything to worry about and she just freaked out for no reason!" Aang screeched cutting Zuko off mid-sentence. Zuko glared. "I wasn't finished." He said his right eye twitching slightly. "Oh, sorry sifu." Aang said sheepishly. Zuko pressed his lips together waited until his annoyance passed. He sighed again. "I think you misunderstood Katara's reaction. There are lots of things that she told you about this war and how it affected her and her people, but you haven't experienced the horrors firsthand. She did." Zuko began. Aang was silent as he realized he may be crossing into a knowledge of something out of his depth. He was wide-eyed as Zuko continued. "Sometimes we don't need a reason to react when we have deep-seated trauma. I know that I'm safe here, but I still have nightmares and wake up firebending trying to defend myself from my father. My wife has to hold me and talk to me like a child when I can't separate the memory from reality. Because in my mind at that moment I'm stuck. I'm 12 again." Zuko closed his eyes. "I still jump when people move a certain way around me or when I hear words or noises that trigger me…" Zuko paused trying to let the meaning of his words sink in for the Airbender. Aang sat stunned. He always wondered why Zuko was so wary of hugs and touches. Sometimes he did jump when someone entered the room or with loud noises. Does Zuko still have nightmares? Even here where the Fire Lord can't find him? He wondered. Understanding began to dawn on the little monk.
Was Katara triggered by something as simple as a touch on the shoulder? Aang realized with horror that perhaps he didn't give Katara the chance she deserved at that moment. Her overall story was more than about just losing her mother. This war has hurt her deeply. If Zuko is still struggling then perhaps trauma isn't something that just goes away because you will it to go away. Maybe things aren't as black and white as he supposed. "Is this why Katara tries to stay so busy all the time? Maybe so she can forget what's happened to her?" Aang asked quietly. "I think that's what we all do, Aang. We can't be in pain if we don't have the time to think about it." Zuko offered. Aang dropped his shoulder in shame. "I—I think I may have been too hard on her. I wasn't seeking to understand where she was coming from. I was so angry that Katara would blood bend that I never took the time to find out why. When she tried to explain I didn't want to hear it and I abandoned her. I gotta go talk to her…" Aang said urgently. He stood up but Zuko put his hand on his shoulder and pushed him back into his seat. "Wait. Let's give it a moment. Mei Wei went to go talk to her. Let's give them a chance to return to the house. I'll wait with you." Zuko encouraged. Katara may not be quite ready to hear anything from Aang right now. If Toph was encouraging someone to tend to her immediately there's a good chance that she was going to need some time.
On the cliff, Katara was wailing into her lap. She wasn't even sure why she was crying anymore. She just knew that she felt horrible and small and weak. She felt defenseless like she did so many years ago the day her mother… Mei Wei broke through the path into the clearing where she saw the beautiful little waterbender on her knees. The girl was devastated and understandably so. Her dearest friend and the person she cared for more than life treated her like a villain or perhaps even a monster. Mei had heard from the others about the blood bending and how she was forced to learn it from the old Southern tribal woman who was obviously dealing with her own hurt, anger, and trauma and passed it on to Katara. She would have to be careful. Mei took a deep breath and called to the girl gently. "Katara…" she said over the girl's cries. Her cries slowed and Katara hiccupped. "Just…g-go…away. I—I want t-to be—alone!" Mei smirked in understanding. "I can't my Lovin'; you need someone here with ye and, uh, unfortunately, ye got me." Katara sobbed. She knew the stubborn Earth woman meant exactly what she said and wasn't moving.
The heartbroken girl sat up slowly. Tears still ran down her face, but at least she wasn't wailing anymore. Katara shivered violently from the cool night air and Mei put the blanket she carried with her around the frail girl's shoulders as she wrapped her own arms around her gently. Katara didn't know what prompted her to but she put her head into Mei's shoulder as fresh tears began to fall anew. "I didn't mean to hurt Aang! I was startled. I didn't even realize what was happening until I saw his face." She cried. Mei pulled the girl in closer as she sobbed and mourned for her perceived mistake. Mei understood what had happened. She'd seen it too many times over the years with the children of war: jittery movements at sudden noises, the haunted eyes, working hard to distract themselves, the hesitancy to let others get close for fear of betrayal or hurt from loss. She saw that very same thing in the Prince of the Fire Nation, but Zuko finding a friend and now lover was perhaps the one thing that saves him even now. She wasn't suggesting that people need a significant other to overcome but having someone in your corner really helps. She smiled lightly as she thought about the one in her corner. Mei was almost certain Katara had endured unimaginable hardships and the fact that she still strives to love and have hope is a miracle. She'd seen too many young people cross her path that didn't have the same mindset or determination. A young man who favored a wheat straw in his mouth and drew hooked swords came to her mind.
That boy was so embittered by the loss of his parents by those accursed Rough Rhinos that she was sure he was going to find himself on the Fire Lord's most wanted list or dead someday. She hoped Katara and her friends had never crossed paths with the likes of him. He was a master manipulator and could derail even the most stalwart and focused of people. Mei sighed deeply as she held the girl and rubbed small circles on her back willing her to find a moment of peace for her mind. "Your friend knows it was an accident. I think he was shocked and caught off guard. That's quite an amazing thing you can do. The young Avatar will understand. You just have to talk to him about it." Mei said softly. The girl sat up slowly and sniffed. "I don't think so, Mei. You didn't see the way he looked at me. I felt so…dirty. Like I had betrayed him. How can you be so sure he'll hear me?" Katara was so earnest and sincere. Aang would have to be a fool not to realize this girl cared about him and wasn't trying to hurt him! "Well, if I know the prince of the Fire Nation like I think I do, he will help that young man to understand and if the Avatar is as noble as he claims, then he will talk to ye and listen." She said. Katara stared in wide-eyed surprise at the older woman. She had so much hope in them that Mei wanted to reassure her fully. "Beautiful girl, I think Avatar Aang was hurt more because of how much he values your friendship rather than by what happened, although I do think he was frightened a little too. I suspect you two will have a conversation once we return to the house. He cares an awful lot about ye. Trust what ye have with yer friends. These people are in yer corner. I've seen it. I have no doubt they would die for you, Katara as they know you would do the same for them. Don't worry; he will listen." Mei said with full confidence.
Mei Wei hadn't spent as long with the younger members of this group as long as she had with La La and Zuko, but she could see there was a bond that was near to impossible to sever. Things would be well with them. Katara inhaled deeply and let out a small shuddering breath. She knew deep down that Mei was right though she still felt a small worm of worry niggle at the back of her mind. She would just have to be brave and talk to Aang. She wouldn't know unless she did. "Thank you, Mei." She said softly her voice registering just above a whisper. "I'm glad you came to talk to me. I understand what La La meant about you now and I'm glad you're with us. I—I think I'm ready to go home now." She said wiping her nose with the back of her hand. Mei gave Katara a wide toothy grin as she removed the last remnants of the girl's tears from her cheeks. "Good for you! When we get there, I'll make everyone a lovely cup of tea. We could all use something warm to soothe our frayed edges." She said. Katara nodded in agreement with the woman who reminded her strangely of an Old General with an affinity for tea and stood slowly. She offered her hand and helped Mei up from the ground. Once she stood, Mei Wei pulled Katara into one last hug and rubbed her back. "I admire you children so much for what you're doing. It takes a lot of strength and courage to stand up against so much evil in this world. Not many adults are willing without prompting or dire necessity. I'm proud of all of ye. Come on dearie; let's go home." She said as she took the girl's arm in hers and they made their way down the well-worn path.
As they entered the house, several pairs of eyes looked up to see who it was though Toph had already told them the pair were heading back to the house. "Katara!" they shouted together running to put their arms around the girl grateful she came back to them safe and sound and looking well under the circumstances. Sokka looked over at his sister with a question and Katara sighed. She knew what he was asking and she shook her head to ease his concerns. Sokka nodded in understanding and put his boomerang back under his chair. Mei smiled and gave Katara a gentle pat on her shoulder as Toph grabbed Katara's hand and led her back to the table to sit between her and Sokka. Mei walked off to go and make the tea she promised and smiled at Zuko and Carla who winked knowingly. Aang sat silently next to Zuko. He watched his hands for several minutes while the table sat in somewhat uncomfortable silence waiting to see what would happen next. Zuko yawned and stretched his arms above his head. He cracked and groaned like an old man after a long sit in his favorite chair. "Welp, I think it's about time for most of us to go to bed. La La you coming?" he said giving an obvious look at Sokka while he helped Carla stand. Sokka rolled his eyes but stood up and gave his sister a gentle pat on her shoulder and a look to let her know he had her back and his boomerang if she needed it. Katara's eyes smiled though she tried to keep a straight face but gave a little smirk at her brother's brotherly support.
Toph remained in her seat. Sokka tapped her on the arm and stood back a little knowing the nosy little earthbender would hit him back because she wanted to know whether or not "ish" was about to hit the fan. Toph growled in irritation. "Ugh! Fine! I never get to hear any of the good stuff. Could you guys just argue a little before you make up and get all kissy-faced?" she said to Aang and Sokka's horror. At her friends' complete lack of decorum, Katara laughed which easily spread to the others. Toph chuckled a little then hit Aang in the shoulder as she intentionally passed by him before going upstairs. Aang groaned a little and rubbed his shoulder as he glared at her back. She really was heavy-handed.
When there was no one in the room left but Aang and Katara, Aang took a deep breath. His voice was soft as he said, "I'm sorry I walked away from you before you could explain. It wasn't fair or very friend-like. Can you tell me what happened, Katara? I really want to know." Katara kept looking down at her hands in silence. How could she explain this? She swallowed hard a lump forming in her throat. Her voice cracked slightly as she opened her mouth which she promptly shut. At that moment Mei walked in with a tray full of snacks and her chrysanthemum tea. She said nothing as she placed the tray down on the table and promptly walked back out to the hallway to head to her room. They would sort their issue but the tea might be a way to help break the ice. Aang immediately stood and began grabbing the teacups. He smiled at Mei Wei's thoughtfulness and went to work. He poured first for Katara and placed the cup before her as if he was handing her a gift. A peace offering. Katara smiled gratefully. She knew then that Aang wasn't angry or hated her. He really did want to understand. She could try to explain it now. "Thank you, "she said softly. She took a gentle sip of the tea and immediately felt better as the warm soothing liquid removed the dryness in her throat and also calmed her nerves. As she continued to drink, she thought of what she would say. Suddenly she knew.
Katara put the cup down on her saucer and began again. "When you came to see me, I wasn't really meditating. I kept trying to empty my mind and clear it, but I kept thinking of my home, my people. I haven't seen my Gran-Gran in almost two years now and I miss her so much." Katara moved a thick stray lock of hair from her face. She had taken it down for wash day but now she would have to wash it again after her bout of tears on the sandy cliff. Aang nodded in understanding. It's hard being away from the people you love. He's been away from his people for over one hundred years and he would never see them again. Katara sighed. "I was thinking about the man who killed my mother. If I had been trained or stronger, I could have protected my people. Protected my mother. I promised myself that no one would ever make me feel that helpless again. I was so deep in my thoughts that I completely forgot where I was. My mind was back home on the tundra on the day of Black Snow. I thought…maybe you were trying to attack me," she finished with a deep crimson blush. Aang's eyes widened in complete understanding. It was exactly like Zuko told him. He realized then that this war made more than just the death of people and the destruction of property. People who endure war do not come out without wounds and scars. Katara was no exception.
He always admired her for her strength and courage and her "hope talks" as the gaang affectionately called them, but underneath Katara's exterior of hope, there was a scared little girl who never got over the trauma of losing her mother and many of her people. Aang's heart melted. "Katara, I understand now. I'm sorry about the way I judged you so harshly. I was the fool who didn't take the time to hear you out and see things from your perspective. Can you forgive me? We're supposed to be best friends and I didn't really give you the chance you deserved." he said shuffling his feet while his head hung low. Katara huffed gently. He was asking for forgiveness? She shook her head. "Aang, If there was something to forgive of course you would have it. Can you forgive me for the way I blood bent you and frightened you?" Aang smiled. "Well, I supposed if there were something to forgive I would absolutely give it. Do you think we could start over? Maybe by going to the cliff at sunset tomorrow? he asked hopefully. Katara gave Aang a wide grin. "I would like that very much, though I don't think Sokka and Toph will appreciate having to do the dishes another night." A voice called out from the hallway, "You tell'em, Sister!-Ow! Ow! Ow!" Sokka was immediately accosted on his ear by a sturdy and serious Mei Wei who had had enough of his and Toph's eavesdropping shenanigans. "You'll do the dishes for the rest of the week if I say, young man! Your sister works too hard for you to walk around here acting as if the keeping of a place is her only job!" She swiftly looked at Toph. "An' the same goes for you little Half Pint. There won't be any excuses for carryin' ye weight around here! Off to bed with the both of ye!" she barked.
Toph knowing that a battle with Mei would not be easily won shrugged and went off to bed. Sokka whined as he rubbed his ear now red from the secure pull and twist technique Mei employed. Aang and Katara shared a quiet giggle at the expense of their two friends knowing Mei meant exactly what she said. Aang grabbed Katara's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Katara returned the gesture and they knew they would be alright. Perhaps they would be able to have a long-overdue conversation about a lot of things they wanted to say but never had the opportunity. Aang was really looking forward to sunset tomorrow.