"Ow!" yelled Batgirl, clutching the side of her face.
"Keep your guard up," said Catwoman with a smile.
The two women were in the batcave, where they had begun a sparring session in the training area. Both were in their full costumes, slowly circling one another between bouts of striking. Catwoman had just kicked Batgirl in the face during one of these bouts.
Batgirl growled and ran at Catwoman. She took a swing, but Catwoman easily dodged it by stepping backward. Catwoman then casually flicked Batgirl's nose. Batgirl, angry, dove at Catwoman to tackle her. Catwoman effortlessly vaulted over Batgirl as she did, landing gracefully behind the heroine, who landed on her face after she missed.
"I really thought Batman would be better at training," mused Catwoman, "but you and Boy Wonder are pushovers."
"Shut up!"
Batgirl leapt forward on all fours, landing at Catwoman's feet. She delivered a sweeping kick to topple Catwoman, but the thief jumped over the kick, gracefully flipped backward in the air, and concluded by delivering a snap kick straight to Batgirl's face.
"Argh!" grunted Batgirl, being knocked onto her back.
"If you're going to work alongside me," said Catwoman, "You're going to have to do better, sweetheart."
Catwoman and Batgirl had been jointly left in charge of keeping Gotham safe while Bruce Wayne was out of town on business. Batgirl didn't like it. Catwoman was a convicted criminal with a history of deception and betrayal. She couldn't be trusted alone, let alone trusted with the safety of Gotham. The only reason Batgirl could fathom for enlisting her help was that Batman wanted to sleep with her again.
"Like I'd take advice from you," hissed Batgirl, wiping some blood off her lip.
"Whyever not?" asked Catwoman, feigning innocence.
"Because you're a criminal!" yelled Batgirl, jumping to her feet and punching at Catwoman as she dodged.
"You're a thief!" continued Batgirl, swinging and missing with every word, "You're selfish! You're impulsive! And you have no right to be here! Hey!"
Catwoman had swiftly grabbed ahold of Batgirl's cape and pulled it up and down over Batgirl's face. While the heroine struggled to get out of the predicament, Catwoman used her opportunity to brace one hand against Batgirl's back while using the other to grab the back of her utility belt. Catwoman gave it a small tug and was happy to see that the belt was indeed clipped into Batgirl's pants. Catwoman yanked the utility belt up toward Batgirl's neck.
"YEOW!" yelped Batgirl as spandex raced up into her butt.
"And you're a huge nerd," chuckled Catwoman, releasing Batgirl taking a step back, "I think that's enough for one day, don't you? Or were you hoping for further humiliation?"
"Shut up!" grumbled Batgirl, tugging at the seat of her pants to pluck her underwear out.
"Patrol tonight," added Catwoman as she strutted away, "Don't be late!"
Batgirl finished picking her wedgie while grumbling to herself over the frustration of the situation. She didn't mind being Batman's sidekick, but she did not like being Catwoman's. Batgirl would do her best to run things without Catwoman's help, but she worried that Catwoman had something else up her sleeve.
I am a building that processes your bread,
I protect others from storms and other things they dread.
"Miller Harbor," said Batgirl quietly, looking down over the shipyard.
Sure enough, small groups of armed muscle were patrolling the area. She had found the center of the Riddler's operation.
Truth be told, it was easier than it seemed. Batgirl would still be searching the entire city if not for that riddle the Riddler left at a crime scene. He couldn't resist. No matter how intricate his plan was, no matter how perfectly he executed those plans, and no matter how much he wanted to succeed he can't help but leave some hint or riddle that made it easier to catch him. Batgirl genuinely wondered what would become of Gotham if he ever got over that habit and started pulling his jobs without leaving clues.
Batgirl and Catwoman had scoped out the location earlier that evening and agreed to meet back at this time. Batgirl had been waiting for almost 30 minutes, hiding in the shadows and meticulously taking stock of their situation.
Batgirl became worried when another 10 minutes went by without Catwoman. This deal could be done by the time she showed up. Batgirl had to do something. She threw a batarang at a gunman on the far side of the yard.
Batgirl quickly leapt down from her position and rolled into the shade of a shipping container. She heard the cry of pain as her batarang hit its target in the back of the head. Everyone there drew their guns and pointed it at either where the gunman was standing or up on the containers where the batarang had come from. None of them even noticed her standing just a few feet away from them.
Batgirl whipped a bolas at one of them and punched out another. She leapt into the air as several of them pointed their guns at her. She kicked two guns away and disarmed a third with her hands. Still in the air, she grabbed the nearest attacker and dragged him down with her. None of the others shot for fear of hitting their ally.
Playing dirty, thought Batgirl, Batman would disapprove.
Still, her tactic had worked and both she and the man she brought down were alive. Batgirl swiftly kicked the legs out from under several more of them and delivering a flying sidekick to the side of the last one's head. The three she had swept with her kick returned to tier feet. Batgirl brought up her fists, ready to take them on.
"Riddle me this, Batgirl!" rang out the Riddler's nasally voice across the whole area, "When is a riddle not a riddle?"
Batgirl froze. Why did they have a loudspeaker here? There was no need for it for the job. Batgirl concluded that the Riddler must have set this up specifically for her benefit, meaning…
"When it's a trap!" declared the Riddler, emitting a loud cackle afterward.
Stadium lights burst to life over Batgirl's head. She winced and covered her eyes as the blinding whiteness stabbed into them. When she finally had her vision back, Batgirl saw that she was surrounded by far more goons than before. There were at least a dozen, all carrying some sort of weapon. Batgirl didn't stand a chance. She had been played.
"And you've walked right into it," boasted the Riddler, "This is the end of the line for you, Batgirl! Lackeys! Restrain her and remove her mask for me."
"Come on, man," muttered one of the lackeys, "You know we don't like it when you call us lackeys."
"Just get her!" shouted the Riddler.
Batgirl did the only thing she could, She fought. She had punched away two lackeys when a third hit her square in the side of the head with a brutal punch. Batgirl's head was still ringing as she felt herself pulled to her feet by her cape. The next thing she knew the wind had been knocked out of her. She coughed and gasped for air as her stomach writhed in pain. She looked around and saw that she was on her knees, held upright only by two lackeys each holding her by one of her arms.
"Alright, alright," said the Riddler, "No need to get gratuitous about it. At least not yet. Start by unmasking her!"
Batgirl struggled, but even pushing all of her muscles to their limits did nothing. She didn't have the strength to break free or fight back. They were going to see her. They were all going to see her. She couldn't be seen without the mask. It would strip her of the feeling that came with being a hero. Not to mention the possibility that one of them recognized her face and could identify her as Barbara Gordon. It was too late. The cowl had been pulled back.
"Riddle me this," said the Riddler, "What redhead in Gotham has access to advanced technology and martial arts training?"
He waited for a response. He didn't get one.
"That I don't actually know," admitted the Riddler, "I'll solve it one day. In the meantime, kill her."
Batgirl gasped as she was jerked up to her feet by two lackeys holding her as a third circled around with a knife. She couldn't believe she was going to die like this: stripped of her mask in a dank shipping yard…
The bullwhip snapped around the lackey's wrist and yanked it back, sending the knife flying.
"You let them unmask you?" teased Catwoman from the other side of the lackeys, "Tsk, tsk, Batgirl."
Batgirl gritted her teeth in rage and fought with all her strength again. Though initially just as useless as before, this time she found herself assisted by the fact that both lackeys holding her were more preoccupied with Catwoman right now. As such, she was able to get free. She elbowed one of the lackeys in the face and delivered a full strength uppercut to the jaw of the other.
Catwoman had taken out a few more lackeys by now. Batgirl decided to push herself and join the fray. Batgirl had taken out another three when she started to feel woozy. In that time Catwoman had taken out twice as many lackeys, severely reducing the enemy's advantage. Indeed, they all fled upon Catwoman's evening of the odds. They had won.
"Where were you?!" demanded Batgirl furiously.
"Do you really have this much of a stick up your butt about tardiness too?"
"I could've died!"
"But you didn't because I saved you," added Catwoman, "You're welcome for that, by the way."
"Catwoman!" cried Batgirl, stomping her foot, "You can't do this!"
Catwoman slowly approached Batgirl. The two stared each other down for a moment. Batgirl saw the resolute confidence in Catwoman's eyes and she saw the fierce determination in Batgirl's.
"What are you going to do about it?" dared Catwoman with a smile.
When Batgirl found herself unable to answer, Catwoman chuckled. She gave Batgirl a quick push, which caused her to stumble backward over one of the defeated lackeys and fall over onto her butt. Catwoman walked off laughing. Batgirl huffed and crossed her arms. This just wasn't fair.
"Yeehaw!" cried the woman, rocketing across the sky.
"Roxy Rocket," realized Batgirl in exasperation, "What is this? Is there a supervillain convention in town I didn't know about?"
"Stay out of my way," said Catwoman coldly, sprinting out into the open air of the street.
Batgirl saw Roxy shoot by again. Roxanne Sutton, or as she was more commonly known: Roxy Rocket, was a curvy and muscular woman who enjoyed riding on homemade rockets. She wore a brown bomber jacket and brown cowboy boots over black jeans and a black top. She completed the look with a large flight cap with goggles. Her auburn hair fluttered behind her in the wind as she sped around.
That's when Batgirl took her shot. She whipped a bolas as Roxy swooped by. She had timed it perfectly and the weapon ensnared Roxy as she flew by, restraining her arms. She retained her hold on the rocket with her legs. Using only those legs she could still control the rocket, though it was notably more erratic than before.
"Damnit, girl…" grunted Catwoman.
Roxy swung by again and Catwoman leapt up and latched onto the rocket with the claws in her gloves. She clawed her way up to the back of the rocket, where she cut Roxy free of the bolas, held her claws against the back of her neck, and said "land."
Roxy did just that slowly dipping toward the ground before skidding off the pavement of the street and crashing into the side of a car. Batgirl gasped at the sight, but Catwoman almost immediately emerged from the dust with a restrained Roxy in tow. She pushed the apprehended villain to the ground.
"I had a plan!" hissed Catwoman.
"Yeah," responded Batgirl, "It would have been nice if you had told me what it was!"
"Whatever," sighed Catwoman, gesturing to the rocket, "Get over here."
"What is it?"
"I just need to borrow you for a sec on something."
Batgirl cautiously approached the rocket. It was embedded in a smashed minivan, which was emitting a black smoke. By comparison, the rocket was still in pretty good condition. Catwoman motioned for Batgirl to hold her side of the rocket.
"Help me get this upright on three," said Catwoman.
"Wait, why-?"
"Three!" shouted Catwoman.
Batgirl nearly dropped her side of the rocket in surprise, but caught herself and used her strength and Catwoman's to get the rocket to tip back upward and finally had it upright all the way. Batgirl let out a sigh of relief.
Then Batgirl felt Catwoman's hands on her shoulders. Before she could respond, Catwoman had dragged her over to the rocket and hooked something to the back of her utility belt.
"...you wouldn't!"
"Have a nice trip!" smiled Catwoman, giving one last wink before hitting a button on the side of the rocket.
"CATWOMAN!" shouted Batgirl in disbelief, "What do you think you're-!? What if I-!?"
"There's a parachute in the side compartment!" called Catwoman back as she ran off.
Batgirl's eyes widened as she heard the jets roar to life. She turned around and desperately tried to figure out how to unhook herself. She considered unclipping the belt, but the hook had her pants anyway. It also had her underwear. This was going to hurt.
"Catwoooomaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!" cried out Batgirl as her pants were literally rocketed up her butt as she flew up high into the sky.
Batgirl did manage to get to the parachute and get off the rocket safely, slowly drifting to the ground. She winced as she kicked her legs about, trying to dislodge the wedgie. Her arms were being held too tightly by the parachute straps for her to pick it. All she could do was try to wriggle it out with her legs.
She safely made it to the ground, where she finally dug into the back of her pans and plucked the layers of fabric out of her butt. She heard snickering. She looked around to see she had landed just beside a restaurant, where patrons were looking at her from inside, some with their phones out.
Batgirl waddled back to the batcave before changing and going home to her apartment. She tried to reach out to Catwoman, but she didn't hear from her at all for the rest of the night.
Gotham News: String of Lootings in Burnley Follow Supervillain Attack
"You're kidding," sighed Barbara under her breath.
Barbara was sitting cross legged on the bed in one of Wayne Manor's many guest rooms. She was in her jeans, socks, and hoodie as she sat typing away on her laptop propped between her knees. She had created a link between her personal laptop and Batman's massive supercomputer, giving her direct access to all of Batman's resources without having to sit in a dark cave. She couldn't fathom why Bruce didn' have one of these set up for himself.
Right now her focus was on this story. She adjusted her glasses and looked into the incident. Sure enough, the area had been looted not long after Roxy's attack. It couldn't have been long afterward because police would have been on the scene. Barbara looked up the businesses affected by the lootings.
"I can't believe it…" she whispered, "That little…!"
The businesses were all located within a few blocks of where Catwoman had taken down Roxy. It was also the launchsite for Batgirl's recent rocket wedgie. This all led to one conclusion: Catwoman got Batgirl out of there so she could loot the places evacuated for the fight.
Barbara knew this wouldn't be as simple as telling Batman. Batman had some sort of romantic and/or sexual history with Catwoman that seemed to cloud his judgment. No, if Barbara wanted to prove Catwoman was using this position to steal from innocent people, she needed more concrete proof.
Barbara typed away at her laptop again, tapping into the live security camera footage. She made note of where each camera was and where the best angle would be. Luckily, because Batman was paranoid, the cameras came with microphones as well so they could pick up audio as well.
"Okay…" whispered Barbara, "I think I know what I have to do…"
Batgirl stood at the back entrance to the batcave with her hands on her hips, watching as Catwoman ascended the small incline and walked up to her.
"What is it?" she demanded, "What was so important that I had to come all the way out here?"
"I know it was you, Catwoman."
"Pardon?"
"The lootings in Burnley," repeated Batgirl, "I know it was you."
Catwoman took a moment to consider her next course of action. Then delivered a swift punch right to Batgirl's gut, causing her to double over in pain.
"So what if I did?" scoffed Catwoman.
"Why?" coughed Batgirl, "Why did you do it?"
"What is with you, kid!?" cried Catwoman, "All I did was take a few things."
"Ha!" laughed Batgirl, "So you admit it."
Catwoman rolled her eyes, brought her leg back, and swung it forward at full force into Batgirl's unguarded crotch. Batgirl's eyes watered up from the pain but she bit her lip and fought through it, standing her ground. Catwoman followed this up by grabbing Batgirl's cape and yanking it around her to wrap her up in it, before yanking and sending Batgirl spinning. Batgirl slowed to a stumble in an absolute daze of dizziness, confused as to which way was up. Catwoman leapt into Batgirl knee first, knocking the wind out of her. Catwoman then forced Batgirl over her knee.
"You want to know why I did it?" she laughed.
Smack!
Batgirl clenched her teeth and held in a yelp as Catwoman's open palm smacked her across the butt.
"I did it because I wanted to!" gloated Catwoman.
Smack!
"I saw an opportunity and I took it," continued Catwoman, "I have no regrets."
Smack!
"Nng… Batman wouldn't approve!" cried out Batgirl through the pain.
Smack!
Catwoman grabbed the back of Batgirl's hair and jerked her up into a standing position. Once she did she unclipped Batgirl's utility belt from her pants, causing the pants to fall to Batgirl's knees. Batgirl waddled a few steps away, giving Catwman a good look at her underwear. Batgirl was wearing high waisted baggy cyan briefs with white polka dots. Batgirl bent over to pull her pants back up, but Catwoman delivered a swift kick to her already sore behind and knocked her forward onto her knees.
"What he doesn't know won't hurt him," purred Catwoman.
"That's great," coughed, "Hey, Cat… Smile."
"What?"
"You're on camera."
Batgirl pointed to a security camera hanging on the far end of the batcave.
"Those things record video and audio," smiled Batgirl, "I look forward to showing it to Batman."
Catwoman's eyes widened in rage as she rushed up to Batgirl. She grabbed a hold of her utility belt and pulled out a batarang. Batgirl casually watched her do it, unconcerned. Catwoman whipped the batarang at the camera, knocking it off the wall and into a perilous plunge deep into the caverns of the batcave.
"Don't bother," said Batgirl smugly, "The live feed was downloaded to my private server as it happened. You'll never get rid of the footage."
"Well you'll never show Batman that footage!"
"Pardon?"
"The footage where I schooled, spanked, and pantsed you?" laughed Catwoman, "You'd let Batman see that?"
"If it meant getting justice served," said Batgirl, "absolutely."
"You are such an insufferable dweeb!" groaned Catwoman, "But I call bullshit. You won't do it. You couldn't handle the embarrassment."
Catwoman strutted to the exit of the cave where she gracefully began her descent out the rear exit. Batgirl sighed and pulled her pants up again. Then she steeled herself and walked off to retrieve the footage from her server.
"This is the file?" asked Batman, hovering the cursor over the video file.
"That's the one," said Batgirl, "But… Um… Do we have to do it here?"
"Here?"
"Here," said Batgirl, "on the… giant monitor."
Batgirl gestured up to the enormous screen looming over the operating center where Batman sat.
"Yes," said Batman, "This will be quicker."
Batgirl rubbed her shoulder uncomfortably as the footage started. Within a few seconds of the video starting Catwoman had stricken Batgirl. A few seconds later she had begun spanking her. Batgirl looked away in embarrassment. Then she heard the video stop.
"What is happening here?" asked Batman.
"Um," said Batgirl, "Catwoman is, um, spanking… me…"
"Why?"
"I don't know," shrugged Batgirl shamefully, "I guess she thinks it's funny."
"No," said Baman, "I mean why did you let it happen? I trained you better than that."
"Oh," said Batgirl meekly, "Sorry… You did hear the part where she confessed to the lootings, right?"
"...yes," said Batman.
"...and?" asked Batgirl.
"I will issue her a stern warning," said Batman.
"A warning!?" cried Batgirl, "After what she did to me!?"
"Embarrassing you is not a crime, Batgirl."
"But she confessed!" repeated Batgirl, "To burglary! Last year you benched Robin just for disobeying you!"
"...this is different."
"Because you're sleeping with her!?" cried Batgirl, "Seriously!?"
"You'll understand when you're older."
"I seriously doubt it."
"This conversation is over," said Batman, turning and walking away.
"I… But…" stuttered Batgirl, unsure of how to respond.
Batman closed the door to the batcave behind him, leaving Batgirl alone there. She slumped into the chair at the control center. She couldn't believe it. She had endured so much pain and humiliation to get that confession out of Catwoman and it didn't mean a thing. At the end of the day, Selian knew Bruce and could get exactly what she wanted. Batgirl sighed as she buried her face in her hands.
"Hm…" pondered the Riddler.
The spindly man dressed in a bright green suit adorned with black question marks walked about his room. The room was lit by a single green light bulb, giving the whole place an eerie feel to it. The green light ever so slightly illuminated the Riddler's 'riddle boards,' cork boards where he was working on his various 'riddles.' The most interesting board right now was: who is Batgirl?
Various members of the military, tactical police, and more were all over the board with green yard connecting various ones to a picture of Batgirl at the center. Frustrated, the Riddler turned to another one of his boards to curse and smack the wall. He sighed and looked down at this board.
This board was another one of his riddles: how does Batman work with the GCPD? The board was significantly less busy than the Batgirl one, but something caught the Riddler's eye. A picture of James Gordon and his daughter looked a lot like the girl under Batgirl's mask.
"Why little Miss Gordon," smiled the Riddler, "I'll have to pay you a visit, won't I?"
Not right away of course. To reveal the answer to a riddle this grand, the Riddler would need time to prepare. That would be fine. He wasn't in a hurry.