.
.
The winter before Kazuma asked Yato to make him a stray, he walked with Veena in the plaza, in the same spot where he would later get drunk and cry himself to sleep on the curb by the storefront. Snow fell in soft clumps from the nighttime sky, and Veena lifted her head, delighted. Kazuma smiled. In many ways, Veena was like a young girl, just as easily entranced by something as simple as the drifts of falling snow on the city, or how the plume of her breath billowed out into the cold, crisp air.
"It's so beautiful out here," Veena said, looking outward. She leaned heavily against his arm for warmth. "I forget how cold it can get in the Near Shore. It's always so warm in Takamagahara."
"Are you enjoying yourself, Veena?" Kazuma asked. Veena beamed at him.
"I am indeed."
Kazuma chuckled. She smiled and held his hand.
This wasn't a date, but it felt like one anyway, Veena stopping every so often to point at the interesting things in the storefront windows. Kazuma watched as the lights from inside the shops illuminated her face, her eyes wide with wonder as she looked at the different mannequins posed inside the store.
"Oh, Kazuma." Veena clutched his arm. "Look at that!" and she pulled him toward another storefront. A man was pulling noodles at the window, expertly stretching the dough and whipping it around like a cord, before chopping them up at the table.
"Hand-pulled noodles," Kazuma said. He glanced at Veena. "Do you want to try some?"
"May we?" Veena asked, and it struck Kazuma how slightly ridiculous it was, his goddess looking at him as if asking permission.
They sat at the counter. The soup was salty and warm, and every so often Veena would reach her chopsticks into Kazuma's bowl, plucking a piece of seaweed or pork that she'd already finished. Kazuma smiled. She giggled at him, bumping his arm.
Around them, other customers were blowing into their soup spoons, eating quietly. There was a couple at a two-top who were sharing a single bowl. Kazuma watched as the woman held up her chopsticks, bringing them up to the lips of the man.
"Oh Kazuma, they have pickled cabbages," Veena said, and with one sure motion she plucked out the piece from her bowl and held it up to Kazuma's lips. "Try this," she said.
Kazuma blushed. Tentatively, he leaned forward, carefully letting Veena give him a bite with her chopsticks.
"Good, right?" Veena said, smiling. Kazuma nodded.
"It is." Behind them, the couple laughed, the woman ducking and touching the man's arm.
They returned home. Veena thought nothing of Kazuma following her to the bedroom as she unceremoniously began to undress, slipping off her coat and her sweater and stepping on the other side of the room.
"Oh, Kazuma, will you help me unzip my dress?" She pulled back her hair, exposing the nape of her neck. Kazuma stepped behind her.
"Your skin is cold," Kazuma said, frowning. Veena tugged off the rest of her dress while he frowned at the goosebumps on her arms. "Let me light a fire while you get undressed."
"Oh, thank you, Kazuma," Veena said.
The fire stirred. Kazuma leaned back on his haunches away from the fireplace, glancing up as Veena stepped behind him.
They sat on the couch. Automatically Veena curled up beside him, leaning against his shoulder and drawing her knees to her chest.
"How many wishes do we have left?" Veena asked. She reached across his chest to grope at the stack of papers on the end table, pulling it to read.
"Oh, well for the most part they've already been sorted." Kazuma looked down as Veena repositioned herself comfortably leaning on his chest, using him as a sort of pillow to prop up the rest of her body. He cleared his throat, blinking. "There isn't much left to go over," he said.
She shuffled through their papers, leaning against him, and he saw a strand of hair fall over Veena's face as she bowed her head, reading. If they were together, he would brush the hair from her nape and press a kiss against her skin. They weren't, though, and so Kazuma forced his eyes back onto the stack of papers.
"Oh, Kazuma, look at this," Veena said, and she sat up, tapping him on the thigh. "I think this wish has been mis-sorted. I think Ookuninushi was supposed to get this."
"Let me see," Kazuma said, and Veena handed him the papers. She leaned forward to read with him, her hand on his thigh and her weight resting against him. "I think you're right. Would you like me to contact his lead?"
"In the morning. For now we can just let things be."
She smiled at him again, eyes soft and warm and trusting.
Kazuma smiled. He reached up to comb back a messy strand of hair, making Veena pull her head up as if to take a better look at him. Her forearms were resting on his chest and she was looking at him as if she would kiss him.
"Do you think we can outsource some of these to the Yatogami?" she asked, instead. Kazuma considered.
"I'm sure Yato would appreciate it," Kazuma said.
She took another stack of papers and settled back against his chest again.
A few hours passed. He had been sorting through his unanswered emails when he noticed the warmth of Veena's body hadn't moved; glancing down, he noticed she had fallen asleep tucked against his chest. He smiled and gently shook her.
"Eh?" She sat up. "Oh, my apologies. I didn't realize I was so tired."
"Let's get you to bed," Kazuma said, and he helped her up. His fingers closed over her hand and he couldn't help but notice how soft her skin was despite how often she handled her weapons.
"You are so comfortable, Kazuma, it's a shame you can't sleep with me."
"Sleep beside you," Kazuma said automatically. "'Sleep with me' would mean to have sex with you."
"Sleep beside me, then." Veena smiled. "Do you want to?"
"I'm afraid I can't," Kazuma said. "As you know, I don't sleep well when I sleep next to you. It might be better if we just stayed in our own rooms."
"Oh, my apologies, Kazuma, I had forgotten," Veena said. She smiled. "I suppose I'll just have to call Kinki, then."
"It would be better to sleep next to a lion," Kazuma said.
He went back to his room. Unlike Veena's, which had been warmed by the glow of the fire, his room was dark and cold. He curled up on his side and hugged a pillow to his chest, closing his eyes.
xXx
.
"You know I honestly don't understand what the difference is," Veena said, apropos of nothing, as they walked down street in the Near Shore. They were on a date this time, something they had taken to doing in the evenings when they were free, and Veena was holding his hand as they looked into different storefronts, Kazuma explaining all the human things she had somehow missed.
"Difference?" Kazuma echoed, and Veena hugged his arm. "Difference between what?"
"Difference between now and before," Veena said. "Although I suppose you are a bit more relaxed-"
"Oh, you mean after I got my memories?" Kazuma asked. "I suppose Yukine and I came out of things fairly unscathed, everything considered."
"I wasn't referring to that, but I can appreciate how grounding it would be, finally having your name and whole identity." She smiled and squeezed his hand. "I was referring more to our relationship."
"Oh." Kazuma glanced back, surprised. "I mean, Veena, this is world's different."
"How so?" Veena asked. Kazuma laughed.
"Well first of all, I can do this," he said, and he kissed the side of her cheek. Veena laughed.
"You do realize you could have done that before," Veena said, smiling. "Think of all the times I asked to you to sleep with me-"
"Sleep next to you."
"Sleep next to me. Although now I suppose we can say you sleep next to me and sleep with me!"
Kazuma laughed, blushing. Veena hugged him.
"Is that really all there is?" Veena asked. She looked up at him. "Because to me, none of this is at all different. I honestly don't understand why you were so hurt before."
"I didn't think you felt the same way for me," Kazuma said.
"Mm. That was my fault. I'm sorry."
There was a warm silence. Above them, snow began to drift down again, almost a year after Kazuma had resolved to die and begged Yato to give him a name.