The mute city

What if when Kronos was taking over Luke's body a tiny part of the Time Lord ended up in Percy? Actions are between the Battle of the Labyrinth and the Last Olympian.

Inspired by the songs "4 April – On the bottom" (4 апреля – На дне – (youtube. com)/watch?v=gzJI25OuwO0) and "4 April – Ordinary thoughts" (4 апреля – обычные мысли – (youtube. com)/watch?v=gfBAuoxjyzk).

It's June. Or September? Don't remember… I've lost my track of time after the events on the Mount Othrys. Kronos is ripping me apart. I'm so tired of struggling against him… Every new day is a new battle for the control of my body. I have only tiny bit of his being and still he drains my power. All my power… I'm drowning while he's rising. Weird. I'm the son of Poseidon and can't drown but I am anyway. I am drowning in my fears and wishes.

Every new day is a new trial of myself. What's this time? Just faint, just blood or tens of monsters? Or something new? Maybe visions again or losing the reality, threats? He knows I'll surrender sooner or later and keeps pressuring me. I'm afraid. I'm trying to hide it from mom, friends, Chiron, father… But I'm afraid. What if he'll manage to gain control over me? How many half-bloods would die by my own hands? How many friend and just acquaintances would hate me not realizing the truth? What if I'll face him in Luke's body?.. Could I defeat him? Or would lose and die?

Every new day is nightmares. At nights I'm exhausted and he has more chances to win, but I'm standing. I can't lose! If it's necessary I will every night watch a death of mine, watch deaths of others, feel my heart tearing apart, but I won't give up. It's happening in a dream… not in the reality… Just a dream. As soon as I fall asleep, I find myself in the world he rules. No, there's no gold everywhere. No, there are no cities. Only ice stained with blood and blizzard. Thick blizzard. You just go ahead and witness deaths of humans, monsters, gods, demigods… This is the New Golden Age. Ice instead of earth, blood instead of water and death instead of life. I'm living both here and there. Here in the present. A night and a day are two different worlds for me.

I've been fighting him for too long. Or so it seems to me. How long? Day or year? Don't know. I haven't contacted Rachel lately, haven't talked to my mom, haven't called the camp. Nobody's aware of my state, nobody knows what's happening to me. I'd like to tell, but I fear. I fear a misunderstanding, hate, dread. I'm afraid of them fearing me! But the most terrifying thing is them abandoning me. Leaving me alone to my fate! If that'd be the case, then death is better. It's about only thing I've been thinking of for a while, but I can't leave my mom and camp. If I am who the prophecy is about then my death would fail them. Though the death is so welcome, so tempting right now. But no. I'm still alive! I can feel, see, hear, however I'm not so sure about that anymore.

I haven't left my room for a while now, I immersed myself to my mind. I haven't eaten, drunk, talked to mom and Paul, even looked at the window in fear of seeing ice and blood out there. I realized that recently my dream world has become more likable for me, than real one. What's wrong with me? Everything terrifies me. My mom understood me, though didn't know what's happening. She leave the food at my door. I picked it up, but one bite was enough for my wish to vanish. I got sick again. My mind refused to perceive what's going on. Blood from my nose or ear is ordinary thing for me now. But what has become the final straw is what I had seen in a mirror. The sixteen year old guy with raven black tangled hair, blood stains on his shirt and face covered with dried blood, bags under his eyes and eyes… sea green, but in the pupils you could make out golden shades. By now they have completely changed the color to the pure gold. My eyes are dead giveaway that I am not human, not demigod… that he lives in me. Kronos. I feel him. He's laughing at me, he's mocking my feelings and fears. Now I am the fellow with sea green eyes and golden pupils… It's the last straw… He's winning… I can't help either friends or gods… I am one in need for help now… for help of Thanatos.

I couldn't handle it, I closed my eyes and tensed, lowering my head. I'd hit the wall with my head, scream from all-consuming pain and despair, but Mom and Paul are at home. Don't want to scare them even more then they already are. I simply crawled into my bed and tried to fall asleep. I got it, but the dream…

The doorbell is ringing. Annabeth came and opened it. He is standing right behind the door. Not Kronos, Luke… Eyes are blue as before. He is standing there without any weapon, but with white flag in hands.

"May I talk to you?" he asked, his voice trembling.

Annabeth is staring at him suspiciously. She doesn't believe him, doesn't trust him.

"I won't do you anything, swear on the River Styx!" he exclaimed with the same voice.

Hysterical notes, mixed with panic and terror. I have heard such a voice before. It's similar to mine. Anxiety, desperation, powerlessness… My feelings are completely the same. Kronos doesn't spare either his slaves or his foes. He destroys everyone and everything that he can see and sense. He is cold hearted monster. Soulless and conceited psychotic!

"Please!" Luke is begging.

Annabeth is still giving him a look, but suddenly stepped aside and gestured him inside. Luke is shaking in fear or over-stressing. He is fighting him. He is fighting himself… Without talking Annabeth went to the kitchen. He is behind. She sat on a chair, he took a seat opposite. She is gazing at him expecting, with the digger in her hand and the same distrust in her eyes. Luke's blue eyes fell upon the digger and whispered:

"I remember… That's why I'm here! Let's run away! You, me and Thalia. Together we'll be able to persuade her! I'll fight him! I won't let him hurt you! Please, help me get rid of him… Save me!

Her stormy gray eyes' sharp look is piercing him motionless. She wants everything to be as before… but can't trust. He has betrayed… He couldn't keep his promise and now is making another. She'd love to, but can't. It's wrong. I recognize this look. That's how she looks at me when I raise a stupid, dangerous and totally insane idea. No, raised… She's making a big decision. Decision on a person's life. No again, two person's lives. Will she choose old or new? Former friend or new friend? Who is more valuable to her? Me or Luke… She thinks I'd lost a friend, if she left me, but she is wrong. I'd lost a sense to fight… to love… to believe… A minute later she opened her mouth to announce our future, but I can't hear nor see her respond. The dream is over…

I woke up in a cold sweat, my body is trembling in pain. I'm thinking about her. What did she answer? I can't stand staying in the room anymore. I swiftly changed into a black shirt, jeans and white hoodie, pulled the hood up and took a look at the time. Two o'clock… Parents are asleep, so I can get out the front door. I can't get down from the second floor due to my tremor. Too weak… He's found my weak point… He's one step closer to his victory… Closer to my fading… I stepped out of the room, closed the door and headed towards the hall. There's no Paul's footwear. Implies he is on the night shift. Quickly put my shoes on and was going to step outdoors as voices from my mom's room reached my ears. Curiosity surpassed wariness and I sneaked up on the door. There's a small gap which you could see the contents of the room through. I took a look inside and saw Iris Message.

"I have no idea what's happening to him. He isn't himself. Doesn't drink, doesn't leave his room… doesn't say a word" my mom said.

Her tone… I'm scaring her. I felt sudden urge to approach, hug her and say that I'm fine but it's not true. Why would I lie for? Though I often lie. I told Annabeth on the Mount St. Helens that I had a plan and she believed me. I didn't have any plan! I lied to the guys during our first quest. I went after my mom, not some stupid bolt. During my second quest I had a lot of lies for Tyson. Third… Tricked Chiron, camp, friends, huntresses and went to the quest no matter what. Who am I after all of this?

"We'll send somebody right now. It's not like him…" Chiron said without any doubts. "I don't know what's going on as well, but it must be something serious. Something bad… but what?.." the centaur was rambling before suddenly shouted at someone that it's time to visit me.

I startled and lent forward. The door opened and mom's eyes widened. Thank gods, my hood was pulled up and she didn't saw my eyes.

"Percy?.." it was the only thing I heard before I rushed out of the house.

"Perseus..." Kronos's voice called in my mind. He was taunting me. For the thousandth or millionth time. He's came closer to the winning by another step. I felt it…

I was running through New York's streets without looking back. I didn't want the camp to know what's wrong with me, didn't want my mom to find out. If they had sent someone to look for me, I must lie low… hide or run away… then again it's exactly what I've been doing for this long. I've been running from myself. From my personality, from my soul, from my body and the parasite within me. I got used to being alone at my room to such a point that when I had breathed in fresh air, I felt sick. Sicker than before. I feel lonely. I've been distant from everyone I care about… friends, parents, teachers, even myself… What's with me? What I've become? I'm turning into a monster… every minute, every second … every breath is a step closer to the end. He used all my own power against me. He pushed my buttons… He knows me inside and out… I'm gonna lose. Maybe not right now, not tonight, but in a day, a week or a month it will happen. It's inevitable. He has one soul and possesses two bodies. The slave's and the foe's… Justice, mercy, sympathy are all unknown for him, all he's aware of is control and cold blood. I'm becoming cold-blooded as well, but if only I'm concerned. I care about others, it's me I don't care about. I don't care what will happen to me. I'm ready for death. Is he ready for victory? Probably I'm giving in too soon? Perhaps he counted on torturing me a bit more? Disable, disarm and mess with… Though he has already completed all three steps, what else? I got enough of the power struggle. What else could be done?

I turned the corner and slowed down to step. Silence… How much I've grown used to the silence… The only sound of passing truck arrived from behind. I turned back and immediately recognized in it one of Camp Half-Blood. I sighed again, turn back towards and ran as far from my home as possible, further into the heart of the city. The city became so quite. I can't remember seeing single person driving or walking. And know what… I liked it… The city became mute. The mute city. My mute city. For the first time for a really long time I felt peace. Once again I stopped running and started wandering through the silent alleys of New York. It's night… Appropriate time to live last minutes alone… Yes… I'm going to give up… You may disapprove, but I can't stand anymore! I want peace not for a fleeting moment, but forever… I want death. Small smile crawled upon my face in anticipation.

The city has been remaining mute during the whole stroll. City of my dreams… There are no wars, no treachery… There's no pain… Here live love, friendship, reciprocation and fulfilled dreams, but in silence. That's what muteness is about after all. Here you can forget about constant noise and fuss. You can't help but fall in love. My place. You can take a stroll around familiar and not so familiar streets for all eternity. This isn't ordinary gray routine days, this is life. Laugh without any sound. You curse life for misfortunes, but you forget about yourself. You're the one to blame for all occurred. Or fate. Unlike life that can be changed by your own work and dedication, you can't change your fate. You can adjust it a bit, but not change…

You may call my solution undefined. I can't say what's going to happen to me and my loved ones when I'll give up, but I hope to stay in the city. The mute city. To see familiar smiling faces who remember me not as coward and weakling I am, but as friend and comrade. Good friend and comrade. I'm killing myself and can't alter anything. Apparently it's my fate. All that's left is to smirk and step towards unknown. Maybe this step will live up to my expectations and desires? Or it may lead me to the void again. I'll stay alone among all these made-up images, words and plots of my life forever. But since it happened, it was supposed to be. It's time to get used to it.

Walking further and further away I caught sight of painfully familiar fair hair. How did she get here?! Truck must be far behind to the moment as well as its passengers! I pulled up my hood and strode to the closest corner trying my best to hide but to no avail. She turned around…

"Percy..." gasped Annabeth.

I took off and turned the corner I was sneaking toward. I managed to escape her visibility zone for a few seconds, but she rushed to chase me.

"Percy, wait!" she screamed.

The urge to stop and tell her everything burned me from inside out, but the fear of her terror was much stronger. She and others will be terrified of me… It would be unbearable… I sped up and now was running at my maximum with my head tilted towards a bit to avoid my hood being pulled off. Heart sank unpleasantly in the chest… My world was turning upside down… Now I'm an enemy… Enemy for friends… For my friends… What has he done to me?! What?! I squeezed my eyes shut, clenched my jaw while running. Hurts… really hurts… I've changed too much.

Sprinting was going five or ten minutes. I was clearly winded, Annabeth seemed to be too, but it did nothing to stop her chase or me speeding up more. But the game wasn't supposed to last long… I haven't eaten anything for a while so was noticeably weakened. Thus Annabeth was keeping her pace with me. Eventually my luck played a dirty trick when I turned the corner randomly and ran into my end. Dead end. Shit! I looked around desperate to have enough time to go back and choose another direction only to find deep frustration. Annabeth was already blocking the only exit, bent in half, hands on her knees while trying to catch her breath. Or not only?..

"Percy… What's happening?" she asked.

"A lot" I muttered. I'm not sure she could hear me though understood I said something.

Didn't want to give her enough time I rushed to a fire escape and climbed upwards. I was so scared of her reaction! I really hoped her to just wave me off and go away, but no. She restarted the chase after me. In a hurry I turn the handle of one of the balconies and went in and ran to the stairs. Climbing up and up, I came to realization I don't feel exhausted anymore. Either I am no longer a human or it's not a limit yet. I'd prefer the latter. I see the last door that leads to the roof. As soon as I opened it I realized I am above the twentieth floor. How did I reach the roof at all? It's another mistake of mine, isn't it? I mean I can't escape from here anywhere. Only get myself killed…

"You're not getting away from me..." whispered Annabeth as soon as caught up with me.

"I figured as much" I said. It was taking all energy I had to keep my voice from trembling and Kronos' influence.

The hood was still covering my head. I raised my hands and started to back down whereas Annabeth was advancing albeit gently. She feared. Not me. She feared to hurt me or scare me away, but I was afraid of her presence alone. I could lose control and give him chance to kill her. With my hands… No, I can't let it happen! Even if she had gone with Luke I can't! If she's with him, then why is she here? What does she want from me? My heart was racing, I was panting and panicking.

"What's wrong with you? You aren't yourself!" exclaimed Annabeth, pain and sorrow clear in her voice.

I couldn't hold it any longer and bolted towards. Not to kill, only to hug. I immediately felt relief washing over me. I started hyperventilated and buried my nose in her hair inhaling the smell of lemon. Annabeth hugged me back while stroking my back.

"I can't live like this anymore. I'm horrified, Annabeth… I'm scared of hurting you, of you leaving me. I can't make it without you… I-I can't fight without you. Please, don't go with him. Don't leave me… I can't take it… I can't… Please!.." I was rambling in her ear. My hood was still on.

"Shhhh… quite. It's alright… I'm here" comforting me Annabeth still stroking. "I haven't gone with Like… I'm still here, with you, Percy..."

"You don't get it… I'm a monster… " I barely brought myself to tell with trembling voice.

"Don't dare speaking like that! You're NOT a monster! You're my friend, Seaweed Brain!" protested she in raised voice without any hesitation. "The best friend..."

We were standing like this five more minutes. I was shaking, she was caressing. I've never been so defenseless and in so much need of her help. Yes, yes. You didn't misheard it. Her help and only her. Maybe I was supposed to get better, but she hasn't seen my eyes and hasn't known what's wrong with me yet. I was worried. Still it was actually cool to stand and have in your embrace the best girl, the loved girl on a block's roof. This is the person who cares about you and wants to help. It's the most pleasant and comforting thing.

I slowly took a step back and looked up into her eyes. She still couldn't see my eyes but apparently my hood was confusing her. She likely guessed I am hiding something under it and started slowly pulling it off. As soon as my eyes were exposed she gasped once again. My golden pupils were studying her scared expression. Before I could move away aware of her fear, she put her hands around me again. I sensed the sudden wetness on my neck.

"When?.." she started but couldn't bring herself to finish.

"When possessed Luke. Only part… but it's killing me, tortures. I was in terror. I tried to ignore it, but then he started gain strength and I didn't find anything better than lock myself in my room. Today he came even closer to the winning. Closer than ever… I can't take it anymore… I'm giving in…" the last words were spoken very quietly.

"You're idiot, Seaweed Brain! Don't you dare! What are we going to do without you?" for once taking a step back argued she.

I smiled. Only now I started realizing how close she is to me. We've known each other for a long time and we're ready to die for each other. Another half or one hour we spent sitting on the roof. I rested my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes. I didn't fall asleep, though Annabeth might think so. She was running her fingers through my hair. In a minute she drew a drachma and tossed it into the morning fog in which you could make rainbow out.

"Chiron..." whispered she.

Soon the image of my mom and Chiron in wheelchair appeared in the mist. Annabeth instantly caught their attention. No wonder here since missing me was "sleeping" on her shoulder.

"Annabeth? How's he?" asked Chiron.

"He seems to be alright…" my girl friend started but was quickly cut off by the centaur.

"I thought I asked you to stay in the camp? Ran away?"

"Yes", she bluntly responded.

"Okay, it's not so important. What's happening to him, Annabeth?" joined my mother the conversation.

Annabeth looked over concerned faces and bit her lip.

"I can't tell you" she said finally.

"Why?" was asked in unison.

"While he isn't ready to share by himself, I will keep it" she stated firmly and broke contact with Chiron and my mom.

I tightened my grip on her. It was so nice to know that there's a person close to you, whom you've known for a long time and who've known you, who you was through so much together with, who will be there and help you, when you and everything seem to be doomed.

"You are awake, aren't you, Percy?" asked she.

I opened my eyes and looked up. She gasped once again. Probably it will take some time to get used to my eyes. It hurt a bit. I would tell something sarcastic, if she didn't drag me to the mirror door on the roof. I froze and stared at my reflection. My eyes… the pupils are back to black. I'm myself again. I turned to Annabeth's happy smile. She is that friend I had been thinking of for all this time, she has always been supporting me as she's doing right now. She's my savior. I won the spiritual war against Kronos. Only physical is left to triumph. And I'm sure Annabeth will be with me at that moment. She will never betray me…

"Wise girl..."

Translator's Note:

Well, start has been made. I'm trying myself in being a translator. It's my first work in translating from my native language (Russian) to English. Thus if you point me any mistakes whether it be in punctuation, spelling or using English words or phrases that make your eyes bleed or just suggestions in reconstructing a sentence, it would be highly appreciated. Constructive criticism is always welcome.

By the way, i'd recommend not to be lazy and listen to the songs suggested by the Author.