Chapter 8 Bowser Suit

"Oww! Iggy; that's my eye!"

"Apologies, older brother. Suits like these are difficult to utilize."

Roy snorted. "You can say that again!"

Iggy and Roy were making their way through Neo Bowser City. Of course, in order to rescue "the hybrid," as Iggy called her, from jail, they needed to go through with a plan that, on paper, Roy thought was absolutely ridiculous. In practice, it was so much worse, as Roy was uncomfortable as all get out.

Iggy kept a hand knit Bowser suit in his storage closet. The reason why this was important was because the law of the Kingdom stated that the King had the ability to pardon a person from jail, therefore making all of the charges against them null and void. So, they flew to Neo Bowser City in their Koopa clown cars with the suit in their possession. Since it was a very big suit, and neither one of the Koopalings was tall enough to fit in it properly, Iggy had forced Roy to be at the bottom of the suit and hold him up so he could see through the top.

It was uncomfortable, undignifying, and other words that start with un.

"Iggy, seriously!" Roy stated. "Are you trying to squish my face?"

"Proceed to seal your orpheus, Roy. This is a very important mission. The hybrid needs to be brought to the castle in order for me to study her."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Study her? I thought we agreed we would show her to Bowser!"

Iggy paused. "Uh….sure. We can do that too."

Roy sharply exhaled. For a super genius who had discovered the element of Galaxium at four years old, Iggy could certainly be stupid sometimes. Well, Roy wasn't sure if "stupid" was the right word to use, but he was going to use it anyway for the sheer fact that it was fun to make fun of his brother.

"Why do you even have this suit in the first place?" Roy asked.

"It was originally used in a game of Mario Party," Iggy replied. "I am just keeping watch over it."

"Ohhh," Roy said. He laughed. "I just thought that you had a really weird kink or something like that." Iggy kicked him in the eye again, this time on purpose. "Hey!"

Iggy giggled. Roy, in annoyance, grabbed hold of his foot and gave it an extra hard pinch.

"YEEOW!" Iggy cried. "Why you little…"

He kicked Roy in the nose, causing him to bite his toe. Iggy reached down and smacked Roy on the head. Roy growled.

"Hey! Don't make me come up there!" He grabbed hold of Iggy's ankle and gave it an Indian sunburn, causing the lanky genius to let out the scream to end all screams. Roy could only imagine the looks that people were giving the two of them, as he couldn't actually see outside the suit. No, that was a privilege that only the smartypants Iggy was able to have.

"Okay, that's enough!" Iggy stated. "Not only is it unnecessary and painful, but it is also putting a damper on our mission."

Roy nodded. "Right. We shouldn't get sidetracked." He grabbed hold of Iggy's ankles as he repositioned himself on Roy's shoulders. "Where to?"

"Well, if I tracked the call correctly, we need to head to the south police station. So...left."

Roy nodded and turned left. Or at least, he turned where he thought was left.

"Roy, your other left."

Roy chuckled in embarrassment. "Right. I knew that; I was just testing to make sure that you knew that."

"Mmhm," Iggy replied.

Roy felt his sense of self plummet. However, if he stopped to dwell on that, he and Iggy would never get to the police station. So, sucking in both a breath and his pride, he turned the other way.

"Okay, now take another left, then a right, then go straight ahead…."

Roy snickered. "You're like one of those GPS things. Do you have a computer in your brain or something?"

"Actually," Iggy said in a happy tone. "The Koopa and human brains are far more complex than any computer that can possibly be built. There are more possibilities for neural connections in the brain than there are atoms in the universe! On top of which…"

Roy stifled a yawn. There Iggy goes, droning on and on about the lamest science stuff. Roy supposed that this was his form of punishment for trying to be funny.

Anyway, Roy followed the directions that Iggy had given him. Once he did, he came to a stop. "Are we here, Iggster?"

Iggy's weight shifted a little as he looked forward. "Yes! We are here!"

Roy smiled. "Awesome." He took a few steps forward. They would go into the police station, give Celia the pardon, and then get the koop out of there. Nothing could possibly get in the way of the plan. It would be easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Crash.

Or, at least, it would be easy peasy lemon squeezy if Roy didn't run into a stupid door!

"Ow, my nose!" Roy said. He heard Iggy giggling and shot him a glare. "Shut up! I can't see where I am going, alright!"

"I did not utter a syllable," Iggy said. He cleared his throat and opened the door. "Now lead the way, Roy. I'll go where you go!"

Roy snorted and took a step forward. He did not stop until Iggy told him to. When he did, Iggy cleared his throat again, causing someone in front of them to gasp.

"King Bowser! Is that really you?"

"Yes. It is I," said Iggy, putting on a deep booming voice (or at least attempting to. Iggy's natural voice was of medium pitch and very, very nasally). "I am King Bowser Hortensia Koopa I. I have come to this humble station to make a request."

Roy snickered. This was so stupidly fake!

The person in front of them rummaged around, seemingly rearranging the items on their desk as they stood up. "Oh yes, of course your highness. Whatever you want to have happen will happen."

"Yes, it shall," said Iggy. He leaned his hand on the desk, causing Roy to enter into a very awkward and painful position to accommodate for that. "I understand that, last night, you brought in a prisoner who goes by the name of Celia Patch."

"Celia Patch?"

"Yes. She is a human girl with red eyes?"

There was a pause before realization hit the person. "Ohhh. Yes, I know who you're talking about. She has been causing quite the disturbance over the past few years, stealing stuff from people's houses in the middle of the night."

Roy blinked. Those were the crimes she committed? Huh. He was expecting something on a grandiose scale, like genocide or something like that. But robberies? Just robberies? Those...those were pathetic! Even Roy could commit robberies without too much of a problem!

"Yes, that she has," said Iggy. He got out of the leaning position and stood up straight, bringing relief to Roy's aching back. "The reason why I mention her is because I wish to give her a pardon."

There was a pause before the person spoke up. "A pardon?"

"Yes. I wish to give her a royal pardon."

There was another pause. "Uh...yes, of course your highness. Let me go get her."

With that, Roy heard their footsteps walking away. He let out a breath.

"Whew. I guess all's well that ends well."

"Indeed." Iggy let out a high strung giggle. "Oh, I absolutely cannot wait to conduct the tests that I wish to conduct!" He paused. "I wonder what method I should utilize to get a feel for her anatomy?"

Roy snickered. "That's what she said."

"Shut up."

…

Celia laid on her bed in the cell, looking up at the ceiling. It felt like time was passing at a snail's pace. It didn't help that there wasn't a clock present. Or maybe it did, because she knew if there was, she would be staring at it nonstop, trying in vain to will the minutes to pass with her mind.

She looked at the wall. If she was going to stay here, she might as well keep track of the days on the wall. Sure, it was cliche, but it would prevent her from losing her mind.

Suddenly, just as she was thinking this, she heard the cell door opening. She sat up and saw the blue haired police Koopa who had been sitting at the front desk staring at her in disbelief.

"Guess what, missy. You're off the hook."

Celia blinked. "What? I am?"

"Yep. Apparently, King Bowser himself has come to the station specifically to give you a pardon." He shook his head, his eyes wide. "You got extra lucky today, it would seem."

Celia's heart stopped. Bowser was granting her a pardon? The actual Bowser? Oh man, this was amazing! That had to mean that Roy had told him about her, and therefore he was coming to rescue her! He really was a good father!

So, Celia stood up and allowed the Koopa to guide her to the front of the station. Her heart was fluttering faster than a pair of hummingbird wings. She was going to meet her father! She was actually going to meet her father! This was incredible; absolutely incredible!

She and the koopa turned the corner. Celia gasped when she saw Bowser standing right in front of the desk. She approached him swiftly, smiling as she did so.

"Bowser!" she said. She approached and gave him a hug. Bowser stood stalk still before hugging her back.

"Hello, Miss Patch. It is very nice to see you." His voice sounded funny. It was like he was a teenager going through a voice change trying to put on a voice deeper than he actually had.

Celia raised an eyebrow. "What's wrong with your voice?"

She heard snickering. "See, I told you your Bowser voice was bad."

"Shut it!" Celia felt confusion wrap around her as Bowser addressed her again. "Oh, nothing dear; I just naturally sound like this."

Celia nodded. She stared at his face, noticing that it moved...oddly. It was as if his mouth was being pulled by a string.

"Well, let's not wait too long in here. You have your whole life ahead of you, Celia!" Bowser said as he turned around.

Celia blinked and smiled. Despite the oddity of this situation, he was right. She no longer had to worry about spending the rest of her life in a cell. She was free. She was actually free. This was the best day of her life.

Hopefully, it'll stay that way.