A/N: I am so sorry this has taken so long to post. Semester finals are finished now and I have a break until the end of January so I should be able to at least get close to finishing before the next semester begins. Entertainment only, as always. I only own my OC and original plots.
El Paso, Texas, 1880
They were doomed.
And she'd lost the journal in the chaos, ruining their only hope at any sort of redemption. Jessie swallowed hard under the harsh light of day and stared down at her hands, stiff and stained red with Billy's blood. Across the room, Chavez stood still as a statue, sweat dripping down his face, his arm held closer to his side than normal. Of the three of them, she was the only one who'd escaped unscathed, though Billy was the worst by far.
The door creaked open and Yen hurried through, carrying a tray with coffee and whiskey, dirt and blood smudged on her face and dress. Thank the Lord none of it was hers or Susie's. Doc had been grazed and Tommy was unhurt, but … she bit her lip and looked around.
How had it come to this?
There'd been no sign of Hendry at all, or Charlie, and she feared the worst. It was foolish to hope they'd all survived the chaos, but she'd still done it. What else did they have at this point?
"What now, Jess?" Doc had come into the room as silent as a ghost and stood next to his wife. Yen rested her head on his shoulder, liquid black eyes begging her to do something to save them all.
"Billy can't ride," she said quietly, the words a death knell ringing in her chest. "Not in time." Garrett wouldn't rest on his laurels, not with the Kid injured and the regulators running blind scared. Only half right, she mused to herself, fear tugging at her heart, completely at odds with the crazed notion to laugh. She looked up at Doc, the memory of how it would have been had they turned north for White Oaks pulling at her. "Run, Doc, and get out while you can."
"So you can die alone?" Doc shook his head so hard his blond hair flopped across his face. "No."
"Your death would change nothing," she said harshly before Yen could so much as gasp. "Save for adding one more body to the pile." Jessie turned back to the bed and swallowed hard. Billy was never this still, never. "As long as one of us lives, the regulators live, and there's still a chance."
"A chance for what?! The book is gone and everything with it. I bet Garrett used it to boil his coffee this morning."
"It is not Gata's fault," Chavez hissed under his breath.
"I never said it was," Doc protested, the heat seeping from his tone. He raked a hand through his already messy hair and sighed. "I'm sorry, Jess."
"We still have the pardons, and that'll be enough to weaken the Ring. Chavez, tell Doc where you hid the set I gave you." Their Indian friend's mouth twitched.
"I gave them to Jane and she mailed them to a … a boarding house keeper in Dallas she knows. All we have to do to retrieve them is tell her who we are, along with the phrase 'all is forgiven in Silver City.'"
"It is, huh?" For a moment, she wondered what had happened, but thought better of asking. If it was anything like that night in Porta de Luna, she probably didn't want to know. A lump rose in her throat. "You heard him, Doc. Get those pardons and take them to the newspaper." She swallowed hard. "Reveal the Ring for what they are."
"But what about –"
"I'm not leaving Billy. As soon as he can sit a saddle, we'll turn back into New Mexico, give Garrett a target he'll never ignore so you can escape."
"Jess –"
"Don't argue, Scurlock, you said once you'd follow me, and I'm the captain now. Don't make me turn it into an order." Eyes stinging, she unclasped the chain around her neck and pressed it into Yen's hand, the emerald ring glittering in the light shining through the window. "Take it," she said, her voice thick. "I don't want Garrett to get his filthy hands on it."
"He will not, my friend." Yen's eyes filled with tears and she embraced Jessie fiercely. "I pray to all the ancestors of China that we will meet again someday."
"But, Jess –"
"Take Tommy with you."
"I'm going with you and Billy." Tommy shoved the door open and walked right into the middle of the loose circle, hands clenching at his sides, the look on his face aging him since yesterday. "I didn't know what it meant then to ride the trail with the Kid, but I do now." He stared her right in the eye, gaze unflinching. "I listened to all of you telling the story of what happened and I wish I could have met the friends you lost before." His throat worked. "They died for something they believed in, in a fight to keep things like that –" he stabbed a finger in the direction of Juarez, "from happening again. We're all gonna die someday, and I'd rather die for something that mattered."
"Tommy –"
"The Ring killed innocent people, and they'll do it again until the whole territory is too afraid to stand against 'em. None of you have backed down and I won't be the first." Jessie wanted to cry; he was dooming himself with every word, but she couldn't take the choice away from him, not when he felt that strongly about it.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes." Her heart sank and she looked at Doc, then Chavez. Both of them stared back, uncertain. He was only fourteen and a half …
Billy was eighteen when Tunstall was murdered, and she'd been a month shy of nineteen, not so much older in hindsight. "Alright," she said, dread pooling in her stomach, convinced it was the worst decision ever. "But if you ever want out, all you have to do is say so and you can leave."
"I won't." He came over and touched her shoulder. "Besides, you need help with Billy."
"I'm going with them, Tommy," Chavez said softly. The kid swallowed but said nothing, glancing down at Billy instead.
"Is he gonna be alright?" Her stomach twisted and she couldn't answer, her gaze going to the still face on the pillow. The doctor had said recovery was possible, provided he rested and stayed in bed, but in what world would that happen? Riding could kill him, but so would staying here.
"I hope so," was all she could bring herself to say. They were out of time and out of options, save bad ones and worse. Billy said he'd fixed it, all of it, by not turning north, by going under like he should have to begin with, so why were they here now, staring down death yet again? She stared off to the northwest, towards Santa Fe, wondering what had changed that could have flung them onto this trail.
Garrett was supposed to have turned back at the border …
"Jess?"
"Run," she whispered again, and turned to face him. "Nothing will save us now, but if you give those pardons to the papers, maybe, maybe it'll redeem us." She was grasping at straws, hoping a Texas paper would see news instead of kindling, and praying the people as a whole even cared about the truth. "Maybe someday there'll be justice for Tunstall." And for us. The words hung unspoken in the air, thick and heavy with the feeling of danger closing in on all sides. "Do it for all of us, so they haven't died in vain." Yen stifled a sob and Doc held her close, his eyes reddening.
"You could still get away," he insisted. "You know you could, Jess –"
"Not without leaving Billy." She shook her head. "I promised him I'd never leave." And then I did. Chagrin swept through her and she straightened her spine. "Go while you can, that posse won't wait for long." He closed the gap between them in seconds, crushing her to his chest.
"Damn it, Dolan, why do you have to be so stubborn?" His voice was thick. "Lose 'em in the desert and turn back around, you could be right behind us in no time."
"Maybe." They both knew she meant no, but it was left unspoken. If she and Billy turned, they'd only be leading the posse right to their friends. The memory of another good-bye, in another life, choked her, and she echoed the words she'd said then. "If we never meet again in this life, Doc, we'll see you on the other side." She raised her head and managed a feral smile. "Give 'em hell." He laughed weakly and let her go, stepping back to claim his wife's hand. Tears streamed like a river down Yen's face and she rushed at Jessie, sobbing openly.
"Good-bye, my friend," she whispered hoarsely and Jessie's throat closed, rendering her mute. Then they were gone. She sat down on the bed and reached for Billy's limp hand. And Doc had thought everything would be just fine if she ever took over as captain … obviously not. Her fingers danced over Billy's too-long hair and her eyes stung.
How was he going to be able to sit a saddle before the posse arrived? Jessie closed her eyes. "What do you see, Chavez?" He'd always known things, maybe not specifics, but something. She'd take the ghost of a chance over nothing right now.
"I see the Spirit Horse," he said at last. "But I don't know if she is coming for us, or if she has already collected her charges." Charlie or Hendry. She swallowed hard.
"Nothing else?"
"I'm sorry, Gata."
"Tommy, see that the horses are saddled and ready to go at a moment's notice." El Paso might be bigger than Juarez, but she doubted that would keep Garrett and his men from repeating a massacre. They had nothing to lose, and who would believe it anyway? The law didn't behave that way, she could hear the Ring's denials now. In Lincoln County it did. Anger burned its way through her veins. They'd pay … somehow … there had to be a way. "Chavez, help Tommy. Whatever we need, get it, I don't care how anymore." It likely wouldn't matter soon anyway.
The door closed behind them and she laid her head on the pillow next to Billy's. "We'll make it, I know we will," she whispered in his ear. "We've got each other." It wasn't long and drawn out like the life that would have been, this time was almost obscenely fast, circumstances forcing her to acknowledge her feelings so much sooner, and maybe it was better this way. At least they could be together for this little while before Garrett caught up and triggered a showdown that would turn them all into legends. A tear slipped over her nose and landed on the crisp cotton.
How had it all gone so wrong?
"Jess …" She lurched upright, found Billy watching her through squinted eyes. "Leave …" he choked out, "please." His fingers scrabbled in the sheets and she clutched his hand. His eyes glistened. "I deserve it … but … but you …" he drew in a gasping breath. "My fault."
"No."
"Messed up," he slurred. "Wanted to … make it … right." His chest heaved. "Made … worse."
"No," she said again. "Garrett made things worse, he took his damn posse into Mexico and slaughtered a whole town! How in the hell do you think that's your fault?" Billy shook his head weakly.
"Wanted to save you … but fate can't be changed," he rasped, pushing the words out as fast he could. "I always ruin everything." A tear slid down his cheek.
"No." She touched his face. "I sent them away, Billy. Doc and Yen will be safe. Tommy … he's coming with us." Her voice broke. "Chavez, too. We're all going to turn back into New Mexico, draw Garrett away from Doc."
"I wish …"
"They won't leave, I've tried. Doc is going for the pardons Chavez hid, he'll give them to the papers."
"It won't be … enough."
"Maybe it will." She squeezed his hand. "We've made it this far, what's one more minor miracle?" Her voice broke again. "It's the only card we've got left. Besides, Francis has to earn his keep somehow." Billy choked on a laugh and clutched at his chest.
"We can't go to Sumner." Her throat closed. It seemed Fate was dragging them back to the showdown despite every effort they made to thwart it. They couldn't go to Susan, or Jane. Anywhere they went, Garrett would follow, and every hour spent in the saddle wouldn't do Billy any favors.
"There's nowhere else left, Billy."