Hey guys… I know it's been a while since I've posted anything.

Well to be exact it's been since the summer time that I've posted a single thing…

Sorry… I really am.

:[

Anyway, here is something I've been working on.

I would love your opinions on it.

I probably won't post often on this one either but hey… it's worth a shot right?

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.

Feedback is extremely appreciated.

P.S. I listened to Lazy Eye by Silversun Pickups and The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows by Brand New (which is where I got my title from; it belongs to them) while writing most of this. It might not mean a lot in this chapter but later on it will become a bit more clear.

The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person.

-Chuck Palahniuk

Love had never been on my agenda. The though of even getting married was never uttered in my family... until now.

No, I am not being forced to marry against my will. I don't have some kind of suitor lined up for me since I was born. Even though that would probably make my life easier than it is right now. Sometimes I even wish that were my case.

It would just mean that someone would actually want me… even if they didn't, I would at least have someone to hold on to… someone I could be useful to. It would give me something to do.

All I want is to be useful. I don't want to be that typical crippled girl who is the family burden... but that is what I have become and I hate it. How I hate it.

Even though I try to help with anything I can. I help my parents run the book shop, cook, clean, take care of the bratty grandchildren. I'm still a worthless burden like an old hag. No, not even like a senior citizen because they have done their duty to the village. I'm worst.

I hate what I have become.

My parents are old... well not exactly old. Their bodies have been worked to their full extent. The poor fragile bones under their flesh no longer have the same resilience they did in the peak of their golden age. Their skin is rugged and horribly taken care of. Their eagle eyes no longer have the same sharpness as they did in their youth.

I tried to not stare at my father as he read on the counter or at my mother as she dusted the many shelves full of countless books with colorful bindings. Every time I see them my stomach churns in shame. They shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be here. I should be completing missions, serving my village..

"Mother go upstairs and rest," I continued to shelve the incoming books in the "New Releases" side of a bookshelf by the counter. "Taking care of the shop is my responsibility."

My mother's dark wrinkled face chuckled, "Oh child I am a restless old woman. If I don't do something productive I swear I'll go mad."

I finished shelving the last book and picked up the empty box. "Mother, you've been 'productive' enough for one day. Go upstairs and rest."

She laughed and continued to clean. "Rest? Nonsense! I'll rest when I'm dead."

I shook my head and slowly limped toward the front of the store. "Oh Mother."

"Don't you 'oh mother' me child!" she scolded as she moved on to the next shelf. "You need to respect your poor mothers decisions and-"

My father slammed his book shut and said, "Enough, both of you! I cannot read with the two of you bickering." He grabbed his book, stood up from the counter, and climbed up the stairs to my mother and his apartment.

"Oh dear," my mother muttered as she left the duster on the counter. She followed my father up the winding stairs but stopped midway and looked back at me. "Hisako, child. I promised your brother I would take care of little Toshiro. Do you mind if."

"No mother," I sighed, "I don't mind taking care of Toshiro."

I felt like asking what my brother's wife Ishiko is doing that is so important that she has to have my mother take care of her child for the fifth day in a row but I shut my mouth. I don't feel like starting an argument with my mother for a fifth day in a row as well. To my mother, Ishiko is a saint. She can do no wrong since she gave my mother what she has wished for since the day I turned eighteen: a grandchild.

"… Wait is Kiyoshi back from his mission?"

She smiled, "Yes, he arrived early this morning according to Ishiko." My mother paused to think and said, "Oh and my child, finish dusting those bookshelves for me." She climbed up a couple of more steps then paused again, "And sweep afterward as well."

I rolled my eyes and limped out of the store with the empty box at hand. Why does Ishiko get the passage into sainthood so easily while I have to work my ass off just to even be living with my parents? Oh wait, she's an easy whore who puts out in order to be sustained by the idiot who falls for her loose vagina. Oh yeah, I forget.

Outside, the streets of Konoha were full of life as always. Under the warmth of the sun, children were running around playing their silly little games. I could see many housewives with their straw baskets in hand walking around, gossiping with each other about the latest story. Even the chūnin patrolling the city were taking it easy on this beautiful warm day.

I shook my head and continued my path down the streets toward... well honestly I don't even know where I'm going. I just wanted to get away from the shop for a little while.

"Auntie!"

I snapped out of my thoughts and saw four-year-old Toshiro running toward me at an alarming speed. Before I could react to the incoming threat, he crashed into my bad leg and triggered another one of my horrible cramps. I swallowed my tears and hid the pain from my face well as I could.

He fell back onto the ground and giggled, "Are you ok Auntie Coco? Your eyes look kind of watery."

I tried my best to smile and said, "I'm fine. I just."

"Toshiro!"

And here comes the idiot who sustains the loose vagina, running down the street. It didn't take my brother long to reach us but it took him long enough for me to want to punch him in the face. Why can't he control his prodigy? Well why am I even asking? He can't even control his wife. Sometimes I wonder how he even became a jōnin.

Kiyoshi lifted his giggly child off of the ground and scolded, "What did I tell you about running ahead of me?"

I leaned on the nearest wall, dropped the box I was holding, and clutched my tainted left leg for dear life. The pain was unbearable, like always. I clenched my teeth and tried hard not to cry out. Sometimes I wonder if this is how it feels to bear a child. If it is, call me a sour old hag, but count me out. I think I have plenty on my plate with unexpected leg cramps and my brother's fun-sized version of himself.

"Daddy, I think there's something wrong with Auntie."

"… Hisako!" he let go of his mini-me and was about to try to console me but I pushed out my hand and stopped him dead in his tracks. "Kid, are you alright?"

I moaned and fell on the ground while still holding my bad leg. "Yeah Kiyoshi, I'm just dandy. This is just a new dance move I learned where I pretend that someone just stabbed my leg!"

"You don't have to be a..." he looked back at Toshiro, mouthed "Bitch," and continued, "...about it. I was just trying to help."

I was getting used to the pain so I slowly began to massage my leg in order to relax my cramped muscle while Kiyoshi just stared and scratched his curly golden brown hair like a dumbfounded puppy.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"Auntie Coco, did you get another leg cramp?" the child prodigy observed my lame leg and continued, "Maybe you should go to a doctor for that."

My leg muscle was finally starting to relax.

Way to go Captain Obvious.

I laughed and continued to massage my leg slowly. Luckily not a lot of people noticed my little scene and if they did they obviously didn't care to stop and snoop around. "Maybe next week, I don't have time for silly things like that… and stop calling me Coco. This is like the fifth time I've told you."

"I will… when you stop smelling like sugary sweet coconuts," he retorted.

I stuck out my tongue at Toshiro and he did the same.

I need to stop arguing with four-year-olds.

"Children enough fighting." Kiyoshi offered me his hand and I accepted it. "Especially you Hisako, you're a grown woman for god's sake."

I rolled my eyes. "Sorry Father." I looked at Toshiro and mouthed, "I'll get you back!"

Toshiro stuck out his tongue again and giggled.

Kiyoshi pulled me up and put my right arm over his shoulder. "Do you think you can walk?"

I flinched. "Most likely." I tried to shift a little bit of weight toward my left leg and a bolt of pain shot through it like lightening. I instantly raised it and stood on my right foot alone. "Never mind. I thought I'd be used to the pain by now."

He sighed and massaged his temples, "Alright. well Toshiro walk in front of me so I can see you. Hisako, just lean on me and I'll help you home."

Toshiro scratched his little white haired head and said, "Daddy can I just run there? It'll be faster than walking with Auntie Coco and I can help Grandma take care of the store and."

"Yes, yes! Run along and tell Grandma to get a chair for your Auntie."

Before he could even finish his sentence, Toshiro was half way there. He continued to stare until he was sure that his one and only child arrived safely.

Up close, I noticed that Kiyoshi's face looked less. exuberant than usual. I could actually see alarming signs of age starting to show up in his once youthful face. Dark circles surrounded his handsome hazel-green eyes and his sun kissed skin had become pale. He was engraved with red scars all over his arms and face from previous injuries, which is kind of scary. Don't get me wrong, my older brother is still the best looking male in the family, he just looks a little bit dead right now.

"Hey Kiyoshi… are you okay?"

He shook his head and snapped out of his thoughts. "Huh?"

"You seem out of it today… did your mission go as planned?"

"My mission… oh yeah," his confused frown turned into a reluctant smile. "Yeah, it went well. I just haven't had a chance to rest since Ishiko left Toshiro with me as soon as I arrived."

I snorted, "Typical of her."

Kiyoshi sighed, "Look, she's doing errands."

"Hah, she's been doing errands for the past five days!"

Kiyoshi didn't retort so I continued, "Your health is more important than any silly little 'errand' that she has to run. If she does this again I swear I'll kick her ass."

He laughed, "You've been threatening to kick her ass since the day I married her."

I ruffled my older brother's hair and smiled. "Well I've been waiting for a good reason to do so. Anyway, someone's gotta stand up for you and put Ishiko in her place."

"Kid, I love you and you mean well but stay out of my marriage."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head, "Sometimes I wonder how you're still in love with her."

He rubbed his eyes and smiled. "My dear little Sister, some day you'll understand."

"Pfft...keep on dreaming, Kiyoshi."

"If you don't know what you want, you end up with a lot you don't"

-Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club)

One good thing that did come out of Kiyoshi's marriage to Ishiko was little Toshiro. He is the mirror image of my brother when he was that age. well except his hair, which he inherited from his mother. The four-year-old child has the most beautiful snow-white hair I have ever seen on a boy. His facial features are still soft and child-like but I can already tell he was going to grow up to be a handsome boy like his father. I have to admit, Ishiko and Kiyoshi make beautiful children together.

"Toshiro will you stop fidgeting around."

The child prodigy looked down from the ladder, stuck out his tongue, and continued to dust the shelves my mother left unfinished. "Auntie Coco, shouldn't you be proud that I'm helping you around the book store?"

I swear if I didn't have to keep my leg on top of this stupid chair, I would have dragged him down that latter by the ear. I know, I have such an amazing way of showing that I love my nephew but sometimes he's a bit of a goody-two shoes and it bothers me. At that age, kids are usually running around causing mayhem and disorder. Well at least my brother and I were.

"I would feel even better if you just sat down! You're making me feel useless."

Toshiro climbed down the ladder and stretched. "Don't say that Auntie, you practically run this store on your own."

I smiled, "Come here Toshiro."

He placed the duster on the ladder and rubbed his eyes as he walked around the chair my leg was resting. "What did I do now?"

I motioned him to come closer and he did. I wrapped my arms around my smart-ass four-year-old nephew and lightly kissed him on the left cheek. After a couple of seconds he broke the embrace, wiped his cheek with his sleeve, and said, "Eww! Affection."

I laughed.

Well maybe he's not as much of a weirdo that I thought he was.

Before I could say anything else, I heard the little bell on the door ring. I leaned over past the ladder in order to see who was the first customer of the day. I groaned when I saw a poofy, silver-haired man in a standard shinobi uniform browsing the nearest shelf by the door.

I felt Toshiro softly tug my sleeve and I quickly snapped out of my thoughts. I whispered, "What's wrong Toshiro?"

He cupped his two hands around his mouth and whispered, "Auntie Coco, who is that guy and why are we whispering?"

I looked over again to make sure he was still browsing around and whispered, "His name is Kakashi and we're whispering because it's not nice to talk about other people behind their back."

"Well said Hisako," whispered a voice from my right.

I looked over and saw the one and only copy-cat ninja Kakashi Hatake crouching down next to me with an amused expression… well not that I could really see his face since he always has some kind of blue cloth covering the majority of his face but his uncovered eye gleamed with mischief and delight.

Toshiro cried out and jumped back so violently that it caused the chair to tilt toward the left. I lost my balance, fell off the chair, and landed hard on the ground with both of the chairs on top of me. I moaned as my bad leg exploded with pain. It wasn't as bad as the cramp I had a while ago but it still hurt.

"Auntie! Auntie, I swear I didn't mean to make you fall and hurt your leg," scared Toshiro said while he pushed the chairs off of me. He didn't give me a chance to say anything, instead he kneeled next to me and continued to plead, "He surprised me and I couldn't help it. I-"

I put my hand over his mouth and said, "It's okay, calm down. It was an accident. Get it, an accident." Toshiro nodded and I removed my hand.

I turned to my right and Kakashi was offering me his hand. "I didn't mean to scare you."

I gave him the death glare but didn't say anything.

"Well I did, but not enough to hurt you two."

I laughed reluctantly and smiled, "Well it's nice to see you too Kakashi. I can see you haven't lost your ability to sneak up on people and scare the living cra-I mean daylights out of them."

Before I could take up his offer, Toshiro intercepted. He pulled Kakashi's hand down and began to closely examine him. "Toshiro what are you doing?"

He didn't answer me. Instead Toshiro continued to stare him down. Kakashi shot me a puzzled look as if somehow I knew what the four-year-old was doing. I shrugged and waved my hand in front of the child's face.

Toshiro's expression immediately shifted from observant to someone who just discovered the meaning of life. "I know you! You're that guy who buys those perverted books from grandpa while Auntie Coco away!"

I bit my lip in order to hold back the laughter that began to accumulate in my throat. How does Toshiro know these things? How come I didn't know this? I knew Kakashi bought Make-out Paradise from here but I didn't know my father was the main supplier of the rest of his perverted collection. Oh, wait 'till my mother hears about this.

I looked up at Kakashi but his expression didn't betray any sort of reaction he could have had to Toshiro's accusations. I bet he doesn't really care what I think about this "revelation". After all everyone in town knows he reads those perverted books so what difference does it make if I know where he gets them?

None, exactly.

I managed to keep a straight face. "Toshiro, go upstairs. Grandma is calling you."

For a second he believed me and began to retreat but with his gaze still on Kakashi. The copy ninja was returning an amused stare. Finally the little light bulb in Toshiro's head lit up and he said," Wait a minute, how come I didn't hear her?"

"I'm a mind reader," I quickly shot back. "Now be a good boy and go see what Grandma wants before she gets angry at both of us."

Toshiro stood his ground and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Auntie, I'm not leaving you alone with a pervert."

"Toshiro, I said now!"

Toshiro looked at me, then at Kakashi, and shrugged. "Fine," he said as he walked toward the stairs. "I'm telling Daddy you're hanging out with a one-eyed pervert." He ran upstairs and slammed the door shut.

I sighed and shook my head. "Sorry about that."

Kakashi stood up and scratched his head. "Kiyoshi's boy is starting to look more like him everyday."

I snorted and crossed my arms in front of my chest, "Yeah, unfortunately he doesn't know how to keep his mouth shut either… just be happy you don't have to deal with kids."

Kakashi cringed, "Well… not exactly."

I squinted, "What do you mean by… oh! Wait, have the kids from the Academy graduated already?"

He nodded and offered me his hand again. I smiled and gratefully took his offer. Sometimes I wonder why the villagers don't really like the copy ninja. He's a nice person... once you get to know him. Maybe it's the mask... or maybe it's the fact that he can be a major douche bag when you get on his bad side. Been there, done that. Let's just say it's not a good to have Kakashi as an enemy.

As he helped me up I said, "So... I'm guessing you're getting ready to crush the hopes and dreams of another fresh batch of genin."

"If by 'crushing their hopes and dreams' you mean take them away from something they aren't suited for, then yes," he smiled (or so it seemed since his face muscles sort of twitched),"I guess I am."

I pursed my lips and looked down at my lame leg. "Well I guess you've got a point Kakashi sensei..."

I guess I was also one of those who wasn't suited for the job...

I leaned against the nearest bookshelf and began to prepare myself for a long day ahead of me. Every time Kakashi came into this store it would take me hours to satisfy his ridiculously vague taste in books. Last time he was here I practically had to kick him out of the store to get him to leave. Do you know how hard it is for a person with only one fully functional leg to kick out a jōnin, especially one who used to was a member of the Anbu squad? Let's just say I'm not in the same shape I used to be.

For some reason he can never find the "perfect" book. They're usually either too depressing, happy, stupid, and sometimes he just doesn't like the font or the color of the font on the cover. The list of excuses could go on and on but I'm not going to give myself a headache trying to remember them all.

The sad part is, he always leaves with the same book every single time: Make-out Paradise.

"So... to what do I owe the honor of your presence in my parent's humble shop? Or are you here to see Kiyoshi?"

Kakashi casually put his hands in his pockets and responded, "Actually..."

"Wait, wait, wait. Don't tell me!" I grinned. "You ruined your copy of Make-out Paradise and you're here for another?"

"Well..." he leaned on the same shelf I was holding on to dear life with. "Yes and no."

"Yes and no?" I frowned. "So is that a maybe?"

"I want a decent book of poetry..."

Is this some kind of joke? Since when does he read poetry? My guess is... well honestly I don't know. This guy is such a weirdo that he might actually just want to make my day a living hell.

Maybe it's revenge for all of the times he caught me outside long past the village's curfew for underage brats. Good times... good times. Well his face looks drop dead serious so I doubt it...

"Since when are you into poetry?"

Kakashi shrugged and looked up at the ceiling. "I want to try something new."

Bull shit.

"Are you trying to impress someone?"

"No."

"Is poetry reading some kind of flirting tactic in Make-out Paradise?"

Kakashi shot me a puzzled look.

"You know... a lot of girls like sensitive guys..."

"No...Is it that hard to believe I want to read something new?"

I snorted, "Yeah. Every time you come here you buy the same book."

"That's my problem, not yours."

I glared at his expressionless face and sighed. "Fine, I give up. What type of poetry were you looking for? I will satisfy your utmost desires."

Kakashi smiled (well I'm guessing he did; someone seriously needs to rip that mask off his face). "I thought this was a book store."

I returned an icy glare. "I didn't mean it that way you perv."

"Whatever you say Hisako," he shifted his blank stare out into space and continued, "Well I was looking something romantic but not cheesy..."

See... I was right.

I opened my mouth to respond with the perfect author but, to my misfortune, Kakashi continued, "Adventurous but not enough to be an epic, sad but not enough to make me want to kill myself, inspirational but not enough to make me restless..."

Okay, so maybe I wasn't right. So maybe he really does want to make my day a living hell. Either way I was somehow right...

I sighed, "Kakashi, just stop already. We're getting no where... why don't you walk around for a couple of minutes and narrow it down to one particular theme or topic you're interested in."

Kakashi took out his now tattered copy of Make-out Paradise from his vest, opened it up, and said, "Well you're the sales person here and I've told you what I want. Bring me some books and we'll find something... eventually..."

"But..."

He shoved his face in his little orange book and responded, "I have all day."

I mentally groaned.

Damn you Kakashi. Someday, I swear I will get you back... somehow. I rubbed my temples with my left hand and kept myself balanced with my right hand on the bookshelf. "Look, any day I would have gladly helped you as long as it took to find what you want but today is not a good day."

No signs of pity.

"Earth to Kakashi..."

"I'm listening."

I glowered and muttered, "Sure... doesn't seem like it."

Even after that, still no signs of sympathy. Note to self: never read or become obsessed dirty romance novels, no matter how old and lonely I get. Never read pervy novels. Ever.

I sighed and looked around the maze of bookshelves. All of a sudden, this store seemed bigger than I thought it was. "Well Kakashi, since you are so enthusiastic to learn about the world of poetry, you will have the honor of helping me around the store."

"Mhm…To what do I owe such honor?"

"My retarded leg had a spazz attack."

"A what attack?"

"I got one of my usual leg cramps. I can't walk on my retard leg because it hurts too much."

No reaction or slight movement from Kakashi's pervy hermit mode.

"If you don't want to help me then..."

"No, no. I'll help you."

Damn you Hatake…

"Look, It'll be easier for both of us if you come back tomorrow and narrow down your list of themes."

Again, no response.

I'm starting to get a bit pissed off here.

"I promise my leg will be better by tomorrow morning and I'll be able to help you as long as you-"

"But," he interrupted and shut his book closed. "The problem is I want it now."

Spoiled brat.

"Fine... but I'm gonna have to lean on you. Are you okay with that?"

Please say no. Please say no. Please, please, please.

"Of course," he stood up straight, smiled, and continued, "Are you okay with it?"

No.

"Of course."

Maybe this is his personal vendetta against all of my childhood pranks. Now that Kakashi is putting me through all of this, do I regret them? Hell no. Those memories were priceless. I remember once I laughed so hard that I gave up on running away from him. Thankfully, Kakashi always sent me to Kiyoshi instead of my parents. Good times. Now that I think about it, the only thing I do regret is not enjoying them as much as he has been enjoying this.

I didn't mean that in a dirty way.