OK I lied, I'm posting this here. This version is edited due to sexual content restrictions on FFN. If you want uncensored boinking, go see the AO3 version. This is an average R, not an NC-17. If you cannot handle married adults boinking in unconventional ways, please do not proceed.

WARNING: sexual content, (I cut a lot and changed a lot to try to get it down to a soft MA) mention of domestic abuse. Mention of drugs and pedophilia. (the deal with Yarika being temporarily canned because of the sleazy director of her movie)

Yusuke would never admit it, but he fell in love with Keiko the first time she slapped him for flipping her skirt. She had been the only kid in kindergarten that wanted to play with him after the first week or two, after the kids had all found out that his mother was single and burakumin from their parents. That was when Yusuke started fighting. That one day when he was sulking on the playground after being punished by the teacher, Keiko had come up to him and tried to get him to play with her.

"I don't want to play with them, they said mean things about me and Mom."

"They don't know any better. You're a nice boy."

Yusuke fought to keep down the tears. "I'm not nice!" to prove this, he flipped her skirt. "Polka dots," he said, grinning.

Keiko screamed and slapped him, knocking him onto his butt. "Pervert!" she cried and stalked away in a huff.

Yusuke forgot the tears he had been repressing. "Whoa! That was quite a wallop!"

From then on, Yusuke Urameshi had a crush on Keiko Yukimura.

Through Yusuke's struggles with school and his many, many fights, Keiko refused to leave him alone. She always nagged him, but Yusuke understood that as long as she kept on, she still cared about him. When it got too much, he pulled her skirt up so she'd slap him and stalk off. When she sulked, he proposed marriage. He proposed multiple times, mostly after they fought. She (and by extension her parents) never took him seriously, but he had meant it every time. He just played it off like he was not serious to avoid rejection.

Finally, he asked her for the last time, after he had come home from Demon World to be with her. He had some of Raizen in him, the part where he was so in love with a human woman that he would give up anything for her, even glory and power as a demon king. Raizen had accomplished this by going on a hunger strike, Yusuke accomplished this by getting a job and proposing.

The final time Yusuke proposed, Keiko had just started college, working to become a teacher. Yusuke had been working as a ramen vendor and part time spirit detective, although with the peace decreed by Enki, it was mostly brokering trade in getting autographs and meet and greets set up with Yarika and the Cult Trio, the demon celebrities that had taken both worlds by storm. As pretty and talented young women, all four were extremely popular, although many humans had yet to realize they were, in fact, inhuman. To avoid a panic, it was left ambiguous if Koto and Juri were really demons or just in costume. Still, Yusuke did a steady trade for those wanting autographs and handshakes.

Yarika herself frequented Yusuke's ramen stand as a customer, which Yusuke used as a draw. Yusuke had initially thought her stuck-up and abrasive as a teenager. He eventually realized she was caring and thoughtful under that attitude and didn't care if he was burakumin or not and was supportive of him being resurrected as a demon, so he sought her advice when he was struggling with the newfound knowledge of his demon ancestry. She had encouraged him to explore his heritage so that he wouldn't be left wondering about it; Keiko, as caring as she was, could never truly understand the need for a demon raised as a human to explore his roots. Now he sought Yarika's advice for proposing to Keiko.

"Can you help me set up a nice proposal for Keiko? I want her to know I really mean it this time."

Yarika slurped a mouthful of noodles. "You're not asking the other stooges for help?" She meant this affectionately, she respected Yusuke, Kuwabara and Kurama.

"You're a girl, and friends with Keiko. You also have connections they don't." This was true, while Yarika and Keiko were not besties like she and Yukina were, they were friendly and occasionally went for coffee together. Yarika would probably be willing to help her friend.

"Only if you comp my ramen for a month," Yarika's advice was free, but the time and planning for a big favor asked of her was not.

Yusuke grudgingly agreed. "Fine. At your usual rate of consumption ONLY."

Yarika delivered. Using her connections as a celebrity, she got Yusuke and Keiko reservations at a restaurant that Keiko had wanted to try but unfortunately public reservations were booked for months out at so Yarika's help had been sorely needed.

"I can't believe you agreed to come here, this sort of place isn't your style," said Keiko, as the waiter poured some of their house wine into a glass for her.

Yusuke put on a repentant face. "I've really put you through the ringer, disappearing for three years. I wanted to make it up to you." He didn't tell her quite yet that he was hoping to have another go at the tournament, but he didn't want to kill the mood.

"I guess I can't complain, I've always bugged you to take me on a nice date."

"The ramen stand is doing well, so I wanted to treat you." This was true, Yusuke's stand was popular and had enough high profile clientele to draw enough business to allow him to start saving for the future.

Keiko smiled into her wine glass. She had always wanted Yusuke to act like a grown-up instead of the middle-schooler who had ditched her to go pound demons into goo for years. Now she was glad to see that Yusuke had finally become a man and started to act responsibly. It couldn't be helped that Yusuke couldn't make use of an education, those of his class had to struggle to get anywhere in life even if they managed to go to university. Yusuke was not very book-smart but he had surprising business sense, and did a good job with his ramen business. He had found his niche, and Keiko was proud of him.

Yusuke managed to get through the meal without major breaches of etiquette, though he had made Keiko squeak when he rubbed his foot up her calf while playing innocent. Keiko blushed furiously and could barely speak to the waiter when he brought their desserts.

"T-this was not what I ordered," she managed to get out as he set a beautiful confection in front of her, topped with a ring.

"This was special ordered for you, madam," said the waiter, smiling.

Keiko stared at it, dumbstruck.
"Did I also mention I saved enough to buy you an engagement ring?" said Yusuke, grinning. "It's nothing huge, but it's real."

"Yusuke, you scoundrel," said Keiko, staring at it, her voice shaking a little, thinking of the other times he had proposed to make her forgive him. "Do you really think this will make us even for ditching me for so long?"

Yusuke's face became serious. "You don't have to forgive me, but if you marry me I won't have a good enough reason to ditch you again. All the fun fights in the world aren't as important as you are."

Keiko wiped her eyes. Though emotional, she could see that Yusuke was being sincere for once, he had even gone through the trouble to set up a more formal proposal and produced an engagement ring. "You've really grown up, Yusuke."

Yusuke allowed himself to grin again when Keiko put the ring on. He raised his glass. "Here's to the future Mr. and Mrs. Urameshi," he said.

Now that they were engaged, Yusuke was more obvious in his perversion, with the end goal of getting some. His new demon instincts had strengthened his hungers; thankfully unlike Raizen he could eat conventional food and thus was not a danger to humans. He also hungered in the carnal sense, but respected Keiko's sense of propriety enough to be formally engaged before trying to get her in bed.

He invited Keiko to his place while Atsuko was on a trip with a boyfriend. Even having an adult son had not slowed her down any. Yusuke put on a video while they cuddled in front of the television.

"I still want to fight in the tournament, Keiko." This was the umpteenth time they had had this argument.

Keiko turned around and glared. "You promised you won't ditch me anymore." usually that had been the end of it. This time he was determined.

"I won't. Think of it as a short vacation. Yarika and the trio will be there as the entertainment committee, and I really want to see Hiei again, he's always fun to tease."

"I don't want you to fight. You promised."

Yusuke sighed. His only hope was to make her happy enough to get her to agree.

"I'll only go if you say I can, but you have to give me a chance to convince you."

Keiko was momentarily appeased. "I doubt it, but you can try."

Yusuke grinned. He started getting handsy, and Keiko gradually turned redder and redder under his caresses.

"What's gotten into you, Yusuke?" asked Keiko, her face flaming red as he nipped and sucked at her neck. She halfheartedly pushed him off.

"The same thing I'm hoping to get into you," he said huskily.

"Just a minute. We're not married yet," she said, sounding unsure of her words. His demonic blood was adding a tone to his voice Keiko had never heard before, and a hungry look on his face that wasn't quite human. Keiko swallowed, her willpower waning. Yusuke wanted her in the worst way, it was written on his face. She didn't want to admit it, but she wanted him too. Being Keiko, she had to try to keep up that good-girl image, like she always had in school.

"Who says we have to be? I've been holding back since I got home, and here you are, looking good enough to eat, wearing my ring." He nipped at her hand, sucking the finger that had her engagement ring. "But I won't go any further than touching you, kissing you, until you say you want it. And trust me, you WILL want it."

Keiko glared at him, pushing down her own growing lust. "Is being a super pervert what your ancestor taught you?"

"You can say it's in the blood to find feisty human women tasty in more than one way. Especially the smartest, feistiest, most beautiful ones."

Keiko's eyes went big and round. "You want to EAT me?"

Yusuke gave her a perverted smirk. "Figuratively speaking…" his voice dropped an octave. "I just hope the neighbors don't get the wrong idea when they hear you scream."

Keiko, although she pretended to be a pure, prissy girl, knew exactly what he meant. Well, you couldn't get pregnant doing THAT, so she gave in.

And boy, did it feel good. Yusuke, unlike many macho guys, was really enjoying going downtown, gratified by her screams and gratified by the neighbors banging on the wall.

"So how about that tournament?" he asked after a few rounds.

"I haven't decided," huffed Keiko, trying to look stern with her skirt hiked up around her middle and her panties around one ankle.

"Oh? Then we'll have to change that," said Yusuke, diving down again.

"Yusu-KEEE!" squealed Keiko, cumming so hard that she kneed him by accident. Thankfully Yusuke was accustomed to taking a hit. His jaw on the other hand was starting to seriously cramp.

"Did you just...?" he asked, while rubbing his jaw.

Keiko went scarlet and hid her face with her hands. "If you stop talking about that right now, I will let you fight in the damned tournament."

Yusuke grinned, and winced with the jaw pain. It was totally worth it.

Yusuke returned home in high spirits, but he pretended it was a great disappointment. He really didn't mind losing the tournament, nor was he particularly hoping to win; being king would have been a major turn-off for Keiko, since he'd be gone for weeks or at a time if he was. Beating up powerful demons was fun enough for now. When they married and he got a rugrat out of Keiko he wouldn't have time for it, since Keiko wanted to keep teaching for as long as possible. Yusuke had every intention of helping raise their offspring, partly out of love for Keiko and partly as a fuck you to his yakuza sperm donor.

Yusuke remembered his biological father, but he hated him and refused to see him face to face. He remembered his father slapping Atsuko around drunk when he was very little, and she had taken Yusuke from the fancy apartment provided by the clan for their young master and his teenage baby mama and settled in a tenement away from the clan's control. Atsuko still relied on the clan's muscle from time to time and his father sent money, but she stood firm in the choice to raise Yusuke away from them to keep him from joining the yakuza and to stop doing jobs that could get her arrested and Yusuke taken from her. As flaky and immature as Atsuko usually was, this proved to be the right decision. If Atsuko had stayed with his dad, he also would have never met Keiko.

Yusuke celebrated his loss by finally getting his dick wet. Atsuko was getting her party on with her usual bunch of drag queens at the bar and wouldn't be home until dawn. His tactic worked like a charm; he gave Keiko big, sad puppy-dog eyes throughout the delicious supper he had cooked for her, afterward she rolled her eyes and gave him the requested lap dance to lift his spirits. Yusuke took this as an invite to pull her onto his lap and shove his tongue down her throat and his hand up her skirt. If she really wanted him to stop, he would have listened, but she was kissing him back with equal fervor while scolding him about being a pervert.

Keiko only started squawking when he got her on the bed and kissed her on the lips, his hands wandering. "Just a minute there, horndog!"

Yusuke pulled back. "Do you not want to do it at all, or are you just worried about being knocked up? If you're worried, I prepared, I went and got us some party favors at the drugstore." He grinned at her lewdly. "I got regular, ribbed, and ticklers. Ladies' choice." he gestured to the nightstand.

Keiko's cheeks went pink as she surveyed the assortment of condoms, the tube of spermicide and capsules of various types of lube. Yusuke had actually planned for this.

"I'm with you on nixing the mini-me for the time being, that can wait 'til you're about ready to strangle the brats you're teaching and yet somehow want your own."

Keiko thought to herself that this was a very Yusuke thing to say, but also kind of sweet, but she frowned. "I was hoping to wait our wedding night."

Yusuke continued. "While it might be traditional to wait until our wedding night for our first time, it might be too much pressure and give me performance anxiety. Having to top that big event might make it hard to rise to the occasion during our first time. I'd much rather be able to rock your world on the happiest day of our lives than disappoint you. We could work out the kinks now so we could have a grand finale honeymoon with fireworks."

Keiko cursed under her breath, she couldn't argue with that logic. It would really suck if the honeymoon was awkward and painful after her dream wedding, anticlimactic even.

"You'd better be gentle, Yusuke!"

Yusuke grinned, hardly believing his luck. "Of course."

He was right to want to work out the kinks beforehand. It was difficult to rein in his demonic strength in the heat of passion, and while doing so, had a difficult time concentrating long enough to get Keiko ready for him and not injure her when he finally eased himself in. Keiko whimpered softly in his ear, anxious, but Yusuke's years of martial arts training had taught him a greater degree of control of his body than he had had as a human, but his demonic strength was still hard to dial down. For a brief second Yusuke wondered how Raizen had not ripped his ancestral mother to shreds in excitement, as Raizen was way more feral when he had porked the shaman cannibal woman. He also had to be careful not to lose control and finish early, which would be highly embarrassing.

Yusuke only managed a little longer than most first timers; but at least he had not hurt Keiko at all beyond the trail of hickeys over her body that he strategically placed to hide from her parents, since they were a bit traditional in that respect.

By the time their wedding arrived, Yusuke had grown used to modulating his strength and improved his stamina to the point where they could really branch out into the full range of positions and kinkier stuff. Since his resurrection he had noticed his appetites had changed, he had found other male demons quite fetching while in Demon World as well as Keiko back home in the human world. He wasn't gay, but his newfound bisexuality was giving him the urge to experiment; but the only person that he loved was Keiko, and he could never cheat on her. As long as she was alive, she owned his heart, his junk, and his ass.

Speaking of his ass, he had done some experimentation on himself to scratch that itch. He'd been tempted to try toys on himself and carefully hid them when he and Keiko were having another "study session." He enjoyed being the top; but he wanted to wait until they were married before coaxing her to make him her bottom, as he didn't want her to get scared and call off the wedding over a misunderstanding. The hardest part was actually buying the toys, including the strap for Keiko.

He had had a difficult time finding it, and there were few he could trust to ask for advice. Kuwabara, who was still a virgin and a loudmouth, was out. Kurama seemed totally uninterested in carnal matters, although being so old his theoretical carnal knowledge was bound to be vast. He could have possibly knocked it out a few times as Youko, but he wouldn't be up to date on toys. Hiei was of course simply not around to ask, and would have sneered at him for being a human's sex toy. Botan would whack him with an oar if he talked about sex at all with her, Koenma was a toddler, (albeit one with an eye for hot twenty-something looking ladies) and nothing would be more boner-killing than asking Atsuko. Genkai was now dead, but he would never have asked her anyways, especially after he found her old Takarazuka albums. That left Yarika, the resident open and proud bisexual and mild nymphomaniac who the remaining gang had seen with female lovers from time to time. She had once stated that she refused to become an idol singer because they were expected to remain virgins and stated, quote, "That ship has sailed." Yarika couldn't judge a guy who wanted to try a bit of kinky play.

Yarika was surprised but willing to help when he stammered out his request. She was knowledgeable about sex and mature about it, in their immediate friend group she was likely the most experienced. She also knew how to keep her trap shut. "A strap, huh? Well, I do have some recommendations based on personal experience with them. Planning on a surprise for Keiko, or do you have a little itch that needs scratching yourself?"

"An itch," admitted Yusuke, his face flaming.

"Nothing to be ashamed of. I hear that feels good for a lot of guys, even straight ones."

He had to admit something that was on his mind for years. "I don't feel quite straight anymore, not since I came back as a demon. Before I died the second time I never checked out another guy, but I have since. It's weird."

"That's not weird. A lot of demons are bisexual, often leaning more to one side or the other; with exceptions for certain societies like Yukina's people who are mostly asexual or lesbian since they are isolated and mostly reproduce by themselves. Yukina and her late mom might be the only straight ones on the whole island. And likely Kurama, who I highly suspect is asexual, which is funny because kitsune are supposed to be sex gods."

Yusuke felt relieved. Having that stated in a matter-of-fact way was a load off.

"Thanks. Hey, uh, are you okay? You've been looking a little off color lately since you got back from Demon World."

"I'm having trouble at work, I'm blacklisted because the director got caught with blow on the casting couch with some girls way too young to consent, everyone's been canned for the time being while the cops sort out who was doing blow and weed and who knew about the girls, even though I had just been cast and barely met the prick. I think I'll be able to get my job back eventually but I'm tarred by the association right now. Recreational drugs and booze don't usually affect me like they do humans, so I don't really see the point in ingesting them unless I like the taste. I'll be fine, we have Dad's income and my savings. I'll just be bored out of my skull. I am still looking forward to your wedding."

With the recommended strap, Yusuke had put together his honeymoon arsenal at last. The wedding went off without a hitch, and he was wearing a very frou-frou, outdated wedding tuxedo which was out of fashion in most other countries but inexplicably remained in fashion in Japan. Keiko, however, had on a beautiful dress that Yusuke was tempted to destroy like wrapping paper on a present. He got through the painfully long reception, thankful that the wretched tux drew the eye upward to help hide his interest in his bride.

He shed that tux almost the second he got into the hotel room, eager to be free of it, eager to rock Keiko's world, and then convince her to do him in return.

The first two were easy. He made good on his promise to rock Keiko's world on their wedding night, nearly blowing out her voice with all the ecstatic screaming. Then came the hard part, which he saved until the second day of their honeymoon.

"Keiko, I think we've mastered all the variations on traditional lovemaking, how about we try something unorthodox?" he said after they had come back from dinner, ready for another night of lovemaking.

"What do you mean, unorthodox?"

"Like… toys. And using other doors."

"You mean you want to put it in the backdoor?" Keiko wasn't as much a prude as she had pretended to be in public, so she figured Yusuke might want to try that at some point.

"Well... I certainly would like to try that when you're ready. I was thinking instead of being the car I might like to try being the parking space." He unzipped the bag that he had packed, with the toys he had chosen for his personal use and let her see.

Keiko had a mild freak-out. "Yusuke, are you gay!?" she squeaked. For a wild moment she had wondered if Yusuke had married her as his beard.

Yusuke was a little miffed. "It's not gay to want to experiment. It's not like I want a GUY to do it. I want YOU to do it, since you're the only one I love."

Keiko calmed a little, though her thoughts were still whirling. She had done her homework as to things Yusuke might want to do to her, but she had not considered that other than a blowjob, Yusuke might want some things done to him. At least he was into her, and not as a beard.

"Let me think about it," she said faintly.

"That's fair," he agreed. "I know it's a lot to ask. I really do love you, Keiko. I don't want to make you do it if you really don't want to."

Keiko felt reassured and Yusuke didn't push it the rest of the night. She let Yusuke make sweet, tender love to her that night. She considered his request as they lay there in the afterglow.

The last night of their honeymoon, she finally agreed to try it. Yusuke had subtly begged her, with those big brown puppy dog eyes a major weapon.

"Shit, that was incredible," he panted, his body like jelly on the bed after they were through. "I'll be your bitch anytime," he grinned when Keiko had withdrawn. Keiko said nothing, still in shock at how loud and intense Yusuke's orgasm had been. She was turned on, albeit shell-shocked at the same time. Yusuke slept like a baby, totally worn out and satisfied.

Eventually Keiko and Yusuke conceived their first child and for a time, all was good. Keiko's second trimester libido matched his own. When her belly grew too big for Keiko to be the parking space, the toys came out of their chest and Yusuke was both happy and a little sore for those long weeks until they welcomed their baby boy Keisuke into the world. A newborn put a bit of a damper on their sex life at first. As soon as the doctor gave the okay, Yusuke proved that leaky breasts, tummy flab and stretch marks didn't turn him off in the least.

They tried for another child here and there, however one thing or the other kept Keisuke a single child. Keisuke proved to be his father's child, being both spiritually powerful and a delinquent; his powers taking much time and effort to cultivate and his delinquency causing frequent parent-teacher meetings. Keisuke had a bit of Keiko in him too, because he got good grades, too. This mini-me had taken on the mantle of Spirit Detective in middle school with his close friends the Kuwabara twins assisting and to a lesser extent, Yona and Rukia. Botan had to whack Keisuke with an oar a few times, as he was just as perverted as Yusuke. Koenma kept some headache pills in his desk and calming aromatherapy supplies on top, as he had learned from his experience with Yusuke how stressful the Urameshi line was to deal with.

When Keisuke reached middle school and Keiko first started showing the signs of aging and he didn't, Keiko felt too self conscious to let him touch for a while.

"Yusuke, I'm going to get old and you won't," Keiko sniffed the day she found her first gray hair. It had been the first time that either considered the consequences of a human-demon relationship. "I'll die long before you."

Yusuke tenderly brushed her tears away. "I promised you, Keiko. Until death do us part. I don't care how it looks, I'll love you just as much when you're a wrinkled prune as I do now. In fact, I will probably never love another woman but you, because you top them all in all three worlds. No one will ever be born that can replace you. If I can join you in the afterlife, I will never want for anything else in the years that intervene. I'm sure that toddler bitch can arrange it, he owes me."

Keiko laughed. "You never change, Yusuke. Just keep that up until we meet again."

Yusuke grinned. "It's a promise." He picked her up and carried her to bed.

Notes: Yusuke is implied to be in the burakumin caste (Japanese descended from those in ritually impure trades, as Raizen's human lover was a woman who ate the flesh of the dead and fed others her own flesh in return as a primitive vaccine) Keiko doesn't give a shit and neither do her parents.

The ramen cart is canon, as well as Yusuke often dealing with the Cult Trio. Same with the fact that Yusuke's dad and Atsuko fighting when Yusuke was a little kid in the manga, though I inserted my own headcanons about the dude.

I borrowed Biz's headcanon of Yusuke's sexuality shifting a bit to align more with demons being a bit less picky about gender of their lovers, and that he got Keiko to use the strap on him as a concession. Same for the one about Kurama being AroAce. Sue me, I thought it was hilarious to have him be not into sex, when kitsune are known for taking human lovers so I used it.

Takarazuka is an all female performing troupe known for male and female roles being filled by women, it can get rather sapphic.

Keiko is tsundere so she can't admit that she's horny for Yusuke too. Yusuke isn't a monster, he'll grope but he won't go further unless Keiko wants it.

Being a demon, Yusuke is canonically implied to be quitting aging at his prime, and will stay that way for centuries. He will likely have a hard time getting over Keiko (he IS like Raizen) but he might possibly get with some other dudes to scratch that itch, but no other woman could compare to Keiko, she carried his heart with her into the great hereafter.