Nervously, I slapped the envelope I was holding in my right hand into the palm of my left. For the past three weeks, I had written Bobby and Athena every day and even found out that he had been released from the hospital. Each of my letters had an apology and brief information about how I was doing. But none revealed where I was now. It was a dangerous game. David could track my location at any time through my activities. It broke my heart to leave Bobby and Athena in the dark. But staying with them was the greatest danger.
With a sigh, I dropped the letter into the mailbox, which the post office would soon empty. Briefly I looked around, then I walked away quickly. I never stayed in one place, I was always on the road, so no one could find me. Today my way led me to a social institution at the end of the city. There was a center there for children and young people who could switch off for a few hours after school. These children often came from disadvantaged families and were glad that there was such a facility. And today I did a one-day internship there.
I stopped at a bus stop. In two minutes, I would get on the bus and go to the facility. Again, and again, I looked around. For the last three weeks I had been incredibly careful not to leave any traces. I had not stayed in any home or hotel but stayed on the street and freshened up at a few gas stations. I had not touched my accounts, but had paid with a little cash if necessary, or had supplied myself with food and drink in my practices to such an extent that I needed nothing more for the rest of the day. Often money was given to me as a thank you, for good help. So, David and Bobby had no chance of finding me. Even if they had wanted to, I had always given a false name in the internship. I felt safest with this method.
The bus pulled up and I got on. The nice bus driver, with the charisma of a woman who felt comfortable in her skin, with her big curves and dark skin, recognized me and my weekly ticket and gave me a friendly smile.
"Back on the road again, dear? Where are you off to today?" her good mood infected me. My mood seemed to lift as well, soaking up much of her radiance.
"I'm going to a facility for children and teens," I informed her. She nodded appreciatively and I continued through to a seat by the window. Lost in thought, I rested my head against the window and watched the streets rush by. Had I been a coward to just leave? Should I have stayed? I had a great job and people who accepted me as I was for the first time. My iron mask was broken for the first time, but what had it cost me? David had almost shot Bobby, and in doing so, had almost taken Athena's man. May and Harry had become a big target. Never would I be able to forgive myself if Athena lost her children because of me. So, what could I have done differently? And why did I feel so bad about it? I missed these people. I missed this job, but if David was out there, I could not put my needs first and put others in danger. All my hope was that Bobby and Athena would just do their best and get to grab this man before it was too late. Before he could grab me.
Tears were running down my cheeks. With the back of my hand, I quickly wiped them away before anyone could notice. No matter what anyone would say, I was a fighter. Life was not going to give me anything good, but I was not going to give up under any circumstances. The years of bullying, the rampage, and any other future or past thing would no longer be an obstacle for me. My goal is and was to survive so I could learn to live and appreciate things I could have missed. That was my incentive. To figure out how a happy life could go, and I would achieve that goal no matter how long it took in time. No one would get power over my own life anymore!
Puzzled, I looked at the sign outside on the street. I was there and had to get off. With the button pressed, I showed the nice bus driver that I wanted to get off here. She stopped the bus and let me out. Just a few more meters on foot and I had reached the facility. Once again, I looked around to see if David had somehow noticed what I was doing, but I did not see him. So, I walked the few meters and saw a large square with a house. A couple of kids were playing outside the house on the fenced property. My way led me to them, past them and into the house. Searchingly I looked around. Somewhere had to be Natalie Sword's office.
"Who are you?" a sweet little girl's voice behind me made me spin around and look into her bright blue eyes. I guessed the girl to be about eight years old. Her blonde curls bobbed slightly as she moved her head and looked at me with a smile. Immediately, I crouched down to be on the same eye level as her.
"I'm looking for Natalie Sword," I answered her, and she just continued to look at me with a grin.
"Can you tell me where I can find her?", I added with a smile. Shyly, the girl nodded and walked down the hall. I straightened up and followed her to a door further back. There was the name of the person I had been looking for.
"Thank you," I thanked her and knocked on the door. A soft come in followed and I opened the door to go straight into the room, closing the door behind me.
"Good afternoon Ms. Sword. My name is Julia White. I had applied for a day internship with you," I greeted the woman at the desk. She had dark, long hair and brown eyes. But unlike what I expected, she was not dressed like a businesswoman, but had on a plain T-shirt. I could not see anything else behind the desk.
"Sit down and welcome. It is good to have you with us. I will share with you the day's schedule for today. You will spend a lot of time with the children, then we will have lunch together and then the children will almost go home. On a Saturday like today, we offer longer opening hours so that the children can escape from their daily routine at home. To do this, there are good offers here such as workshops offered by caregivers. Join them and look around a bit, get involved and then you can get an idea of what we do," Natalie informs me in detail, then she got up and headed for the door. I too got up and followed her out of the room. The hallway was huge and the whole center so inviting, I was impressed.
"This is where Steve teaches the kids a hip-hop class. You're welcome to join us there, and then you're welcome to join the other fellows. They know about you and will explain some of their volunteer work here," with those words Natalie opened the door and dancing children emerged. But when I saw the teacher in the room, my blood froze in my veins. He was here. He was teaching the kids and he was half smiling at me triumphantly.
"Hey Steve! This is our intern, Julia. Be a dear and show her around a bit. Let her join you for a bit in your short," Natalie called out to him, then turned back to me.
"This is my boyfriend. I met him in a bar three weeks ago. He is from Germany and wanted to start over here. Until he can stand on his own two feet, he is helping here and staying over at my place. This man is worth his weight in gold. He is so dedicated and so caring," she raved to me. I would have loved to scream that it was not Steve at all, but that his real name was David, but if I betrayed him, he would betray me, too, and I couldn't judge right now whether he would involve the kids in the whole thing. I had to think of something urgently. As soon as he got the opportunity, he would also use it to kill me. I was trapped.
"Pleased to meet you. You're welcome to call me Steve," he introduced himself with a big grin and had held out his hand to me after coming over to us. Hesitantly, I accepted his hand and shook it. What was he up to? And how could he be here? I had been paying so much attention. Or did he know me only too well that he had simply waited for me for the three weeks?
"I will then check on you again later. Have fun," with these words Natalie left, and David and I were alone. Immediately he grabbed my arm roughly.
"Don't do anything wrong or I will destroy people's lives. Just go along with it. Then no one will get hurt," he murmured to me, pulling me along with him to the mirrors in front of the children and teenagers. He almost squeezed my arm off until he let go.
"Let me introduce you guys. This is Julia. She is doing an internship here and will be joining us for a bit of rehearsal. Let us show her what we can do then, shall we?" he spurred the crew on, turning the music up loud. What should I do? I was not allowed to just watch! Uncertainly, I took a prepaid cell phone out of my pocket and looked at the stored numbers. There were only three cell phone numbers. Bobby, Maddie, and Athena. But who was I going to secretly contact? Was I putting them in danger? Were the children already calculated victims for him? No matter what I chose, there would always be victims.
I opened the text message text box and added all three as recipients.
David found me. He's at the facility for children and teens in the other outlying area of LA. He will kill everyone if he is not stopped.
Keena.
I instantly sent the message and was about to put the phone back in my pocket when David grabbed me by the throat with his strong hand and very roughly pushed against the mirrors with my head. The rapid impact had caused the mirrors to splinter, and I felt something warm running down my forehead. Hateful, I looked him in the eye while the children ran away screaming. His green eyes looked at me in anger.
"I told you not to do anything rash. Now the children are dying because of you!" he yelled at me and his veins on his temple stood out as his face flushed red. With both hands I tried to loosen his grip, but I could not. My air seemed to be getting tighter by the second.
"You're lucky you're yet to see what's going to happen to those kids. Only then will I kill you, I promise," suddenly he let go and I slid down the mirrors to the floor. Gasping for air, I grabbed my neck. With quick steps he left the room. What was he up to? Was he going to kill every one of those innocent children? I must do something!
I pressed my hands against the floor and braced myself. Only with great effort and a lot of willpower could I stand. These children had to be protected! I dragged myself across the room and heard the children screaming. What was he up to?
Suddenly there was a very loud bang and a few minutes later it smelled quite burnt. Immediately my steps quickened, and I saw the reason for the explosion. David had turned on the gas stove in the kitchen and started a fire with it. Not much longer and everything would burn or blow up. Natalie was getting the kids out of their rooms, but where was David?
"Natalie! Where's Steve?", I called out to her. She scowled at me and urged everyone to move on.
"I offered you an open door and you tried to kill us all! The police and fire department have been alerted! You will pay for what you did!", Natalie nagged at me. The smoke seemed to slowly get thicker and thicker, and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. I pulled up my sweater and covered my nose and mouth with it. I had to find David and make sure he had no hostages. My legs carried me into every room, but there was no sign of David or any children. Now there was only one option. I approached the kitchen. The smoke and fire made it impossible to see anything. I made myself small to avoid the smoke a bit and that is when I saw him.
David was lying on the floor in the kitchen. His breathing was quite shallow, but it was there. His right side was severely burned. As best I could, I crawled toward him. Carefully, my fingers felt for a pulse on his neck. It was quite weak. Feverishly, I looked around, forgetting to keep my sweater up, because I had to help him. We had to get out of here urgently! Before the fire could spread further. Without thinking too much, I grabbed David by the healthy arm and pulled him out of the kitchen as best I could. The smoke had attacked my lungs, making me cough harder and harder from the exertion. My gaze wandered through the hallway, which we had reached by now. The fire had spread to the next two rooms.
"Why are you helping me? If you leave me here and escape, you will be rid of all your worries," David had regained consciousness and was looking for me straight in the eye.
"Because I can't help it. You need my help, and I am not a murderer...", another coughing fit overcame me. Briefly, I stopped pulling him.
"You may have done many things to me, and no one would blame me for wishing you dead. But I do not want to have to live with the thought of having done nothing. David, I forgive you. Your kinkiness you have, your attempts to kill me and the bullying all these years at school. When we get out of here, I want to be able to put everything behind me and move forward. I want you to go to jail and think about what you did! I forgive you, not so you can get forgiveness, but so that you will never be a part of my life again after all of this! You heard me! Here and now, it's going to be over!", I yelled at him and immediately realized that it was not a good idea. I felt nauseous and dizzy. My knees buckled and I landed ungently on them. How were we going to get out of here?
Slowly, the fire began to circle us. Fortunately, there were no more children on the scene.
"Looks like we'll both be leaving today," he laughed wanly. I could not hold myself up anymore and slowly slumped my upper body to the ground. The heat and smoke were doing their best to destroy us. Should I just let go?
"Keena!", that familiar voice gave me new hope. Footsteps were coming closer.
"There they are!", I heard him shout. Bobby rushed toward me. Quickly he took off his mask and pressed it briefly on my face. Relieved, he looked at me.
"We're going to get you out of here. Then you can go home with us," he put his mask back on and waved someone over. As I was lifted by the person, I realized it was Eddie who just carried me out. Buck took care of rescuing David. Eddie put me in the gurney that Chimney and Hen had pushed to us. Hen gave me oxygen to breathe. I was very relieved. Hopefully, it was all over.
"The wound on your head looks really nasty, but it doesn't seem extreme," Hen had looked me in the eye as Bobby stepped to my other side.
"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be resting?", I rebuked Bobby wanly as I pulled off my breathing mask for a moment. I was more than glad to have him by my side.
"I couldn't stop him when the text came from you," Athena answered for him, stepping up to his side. She also reprimanded him with her looks, but Bobby just grinned.
"We're taking her to the hospital now. The others will take David. Would you like a ride, Bobby?", Hen inquired of him. He nodded and Hen loaded me into the ambulance. Chimney took care of my care. He hooked me up to monitors and started an IV.
"I was worried about you. I was in the hospital, and you just disappeared," Bobby began. I was still sorry that I had just left. I took my breathing mask back off and looked at him apologetically.
"I had to leave. If anyone else had gotten hurt, I would never have been able to forgive myself. How was I supposed to live with that? It is already hard for me to be around you and not sink into self-loathing. If I had not come here, you would have been spared all this," it was only half an apology, but it was the truth.
"You blame yourself for a man who stalked and humiliated you all your life? After all these years, don't you have a right to live your life? Do you think your parents would have just walked away if they knew the outcome? Generations have learned to fight in different ways, and they have learned to stand up for what may come. Family will be an important point for everyone and as much as you try to squirm out of relationships between other people and tell yourself that you do not need those relationships because you are not good enough, more people try to reach out to you and stand by your side. Not everyone is like David or other people who do terrible things. Many will feel empathy for you and give their all to support you. Even if it means putting themself in danger. Together we are stronger. Alone, you are an easier target. Believe me, I had to learn it too. It was a liberation not to be alone anymore and to be able to share the suffering. The self-hatred and darkness could no longer grip me. We are here," his words were so compassionate and understanding. Tears formed in my eyes. I finally had the feeling of having arrived.