Neverseen Reacts!
By: Phoenix and Wild D.
Aka: bookhawks
Welcome to a new and improved Neverseen Reacts, featuring longer chapters, less cringe, and a new cover. Don't be too impressed. Chapters will be updated one at a time.
Also, not everything in this book is canon, just use your judgment, and when in doubt, go to the KOTLC wiki. We practically live there when we don't live on fanfiction.
Wild D: Disclaimer Please do not read this! It's humiliating! With way too much Ruy obsession. /Disclaimer
Phoenix: Why are you using HTML brackets? Yeah, anyway, I'll be bringing in all The Neverseen characters. Presenting …
Ruy
Alvar
Trix
Umber
Gethen
Brant
Gisela
Fintan
Vespera
And If I forgot someone, tell me in the comments.
Phoenix: Hi I'm Phoenix, I'm going to be making you react to stuff, so today, we will be reacting to human stuff.
Gisela: Humans are disgusting.
Fintan: So true.
Phoenix: YOU TWO SHUT THE FLIP-UP!
Gisela and Fintan: ok
Phoenix: There that settles it, so now let's START... REACTING!
Brant: What are movies?
Phoenix: Wild D is waiting for her dramatic entrance so I'm saying all her lines. Here we go:
According to the oxford dictionary, a movie is defined as:
"a story or event recorded by a camera as a set of moving images and shown in a theater or on television; a motion picture."
Alvar: Only the humans would choose such lowly forms of entertainment.
Phoenix: As I recall, you guys don't have any forms of entertainment.
Alvar: True
Alvar: I'm so stupid even Peppa Pig is smarter than me.
Alvar: Umm, why did I just say that?
Phoenix: I can make you do whatever I want because I'm writing the book!
Trix: Now, I'm scared.
Umber: So am I.
Phoenix: I guess you guys have never met WD, I'm a bunny compared to her.
Gisela: What's Peppa Pig? Who's WD?
Ruy: All I can guess is Peppa pig is a pig. WD is probably some hardened thug.
Phoenix: Yes, but I'm not going to elaborate about WD cause I'm too lazy.
Wild D: Peppa pig is a British animated show whose target audience is children under the age of 5, based on a pig and her friends and family, who are also animals. Pheonix and I watch it sometimes when we feel stupid. We love to laugh at it! Oh, and I'm WD, short for Wild Dreamer.
Gisela: You're just a little girl, what's so scary about you?
Vespera: I bet she can't even hurt a fly, not ruthless at all!
Wild D: Could you repeat that please?
Gisela: You're just a little-
Wild D: First of all, not little. I'm 5 5.3', which is .7 inches taller than you. Also, I've hurt plenty of flies. And the scariest thing about me is probably my glare, however, I can cause a lot of pain.
Phoenix: You bug murderer!
Wild D: You don't get mad at frogs for killing bugs!
Phoenix: Frogs need to eat the bugs!
Wild D: I need to eat my food without bugs, so technically I have every right to kill a bug.
Phoenix: Okay let's watch a movie!
Gisela: Nah to the ah to the no-no-no.
Wild D; Are you singing Meghan Trainor?
Gisela: I'm expressing my discomfort with the activity of movie-watching.
Phoenix: Yeah, but I don't care about your discomfort.
Ruy: Well that's a little rude.
Phoenix: Oh my gosh! Did Ruy Ignus just talk to me?
Ruy: Umm, yeah?
Phoenix: EEEEEEEE KKK! I've been waiting for this day my whole life! Can you sign me an autograph?
Ruy: A what?
Wild D: She wants you to sign your name somewhere.
Ruy: What?
Phoenix: Because I am your biggest fan!
Ruy: Umm
Wild D: This guy impresses you? All he's said is Umm, and what. He also called you rude.
Phoenix: No insulting my future BFF!
Wild D: BETRAYAL!
Ruy: Poor you.
*Neverseen comfort Wild D.*
Wild D: You know you guys aren't that bad.
Gethen: We run an evil organization aiming for world domination.
Wild D: A lot of countries fought full-on wars to get land, and nobody hates them from the bottom of their hearts.
Phoenix: But friends can hate other friends for wanting to be BFFs with someone else?
Gisela: Duh.
Ruy: I mean, you don't even know me…
Phoenix: I know everything about you! Your name is Ruy Tonio Ignis, you were banished forever for doing..uh, something. Gethen recruited you to join the Neverseen and you're a psionopath!
Ruy: That's not true
Gethen: Well I kinda sorta lied and told everyone I recruited you because I need some credit in life?
Ruy: That's a little rude.
Wild D: Dude, read a thesaurus or something, your vocabulary is so limited.
Ruy: A what?
Wild D: See! That's what I mean.
Fintan: What has this got to do with noobies?
Phoenix: It is movies, not noobies.
Vespera: You're a noobie!
Wild D: Thank you for that unwelcome and out-of-context shouting of random words, but I kinda just want to leave now.
Ruy: Why?
Wild D: Dude, say something else or GET OUT OF HERE!
Ruy: Okay.
Wild D: Come on my not-friend you and I are going to watch some extremely wordy movies to expand your vocabulary.
Phoenix: But what about my autograph?
Ruy: Where do you want it?
Phoenix: Is everything a viable option?
Ruy: Umm, no?
Phoenix: Is painting a mural all over my room an option?
Ruy: Umm, no?
Phoenix: My Neverseen book then
Gisela: You have a book about us?
Wild D: HALT! No fourth wall breaking just yet!
Phoenix: Umm, No, I'm just umm… so obsessed that I.. umm named one of my journals after umm you guys!Yeah,
Umber: We're not all guys.
Phoenix: You get the gist.
Umber: Is that a shadow thing?
Phoenix: No
Umber: Then I don't get it.
Phoenix: I seriously don't know what to say right now.
Wild D: Let's just leave.
Phoenix: Okay bye!
Wild D: Just because this is being rewritten, doesn't mean the endings will be less abrupt. Deal with it.