When the journey starts, every meeting of their eyes is a glare. The only words they say are made up of snarls, insults, and vague threats. To him, she is an interfering little drag along who has no right to take part in a real warrior's quest. To her, he is a miserable, rude apprentice who is in no place to order anyone around, never mind her.
The others try to keep them apart, but it almost seems like they're both waiting for the other to make the smallest of mistakes, a slight stumble, a paw a tad too loud when stalking prey, a suggestion the party votes to go against, every time they both pounce on the other's mistake to rub their noses in it. Leading to even more snarling and clawing that made the other's want to stuff dirt into their ears.
"Would you two just be quiet?" Brambleclaw hissed, glaring at the two over his shoulder. It was beginning to get dark on the hills, and the cats still had to find shelter for the night. The two had begun to fall behind as they continued to argue over… whatever it was this time! It was holding the whole group up!
Crowpaw drew his glare from Squirrelpaw to give the Warrior an equally poisonous hiss. "Don't order me around! You're not my clanmate!"
"Aren't we lucky." Squirrelpaw said, not caring to lower her voice, making the Windclan cat return his fury to her. "You started it, mouse-brain." She huffed, turning away from him proudly.
"How did I start it?! You said I tripped when I didn't!" Crowpaw objected, again walking by her side to growl at her.
"You did trip. You shouldn't have tripped over your own paws." Squirrelpaw looked at him out of the corner of her eye, not wanting to pay him full attention. "So yeah, you did start it."
"I didn't trip!" Crowpaw snarled, the fur on his neck bristling.
Before Squirrelpaw could retort, Feathertail cut between the two, offering them both a gentle smile, "Guys, does it really matter?" She said, her tail giving the two cats a gentle press on the pelt. "Squirrelpaw, even if Crowpaw did trip-"
"I didn't!" The Windclan apprentice snapped.
Feathertail gave him a gentle smile, ignoring his outburst. "Even if he did, there's no need to start a fight over that." Even when she was scolding Squirrelpaw, she looked friendly.
Squirrelpaw shrugged, "Hey I have no issue leaving him behind if he does it again." She meowed cheekily, "I just wanna get there without some bee-brain slowing us down." Feathertail grimaced at that, she could now hear Crowpaw's jaws grinding together, his stare icy on the other apprentice. If Squirrelpaw wasn't careful, Feathertail was sure that the tom was about to pounce and put every bit of strength he had into tearing her fur out. Strength Squirrelpaw would gladly return, and by the end of everything both would be left with remarkable wounds.
Thinking fast, Feathertail brushed her pelt against Crowpaw's. "Don't be silly, Squirrelpaw. We're not leaving anyone behind."
Crowpaw glanced at the Riverclan warrior, his fur smoothing down calmly. But he soon returned a glare to the ginger molly. "If anyone should be left behind, it should be you! You weren't chosen. We don't need you here!" He hissed.
Squirrelpaw's tail bristled at that, she turned back, her tongue ready with a comeback, but Brambleclaw's voice at the front overshadowed her. "Enough already!" He yowled, a new ferocity in his tone that made Squirrelpaw shiver slightly. "Like Feathertail said, we're not leaving anyone behind! So just keep your jaws shut, both of you!" Squirrelpaw's tail drooped and her jaw hung, he was her clanmate! Why wasn't he sticking up for her? Crowpaw was the one who had tried to attack him previously! Crowpaw was the one who was so darn moody all the time! She was the one who had stuck up for Brambleclaw whenever Crowpaw insulted him!
Again, it looked like Crowpaw was going to snap back, but Feathertail whipped his muzzle with her tail, giving him a soft but stern expression. Crowpaw still looked frosty, but he kept his voice silent. He didn't have to waste his breath on that, so called, warrior anyway.
It seemed Squirrelpaw still wanted to press though, "Brambleclaw!" She objected, "He's the one who's being difficult!" The Thunderclan warrior looked back at her with narrowed eyes. Squirrelpaw felt a discomfort twist her stomach, there was something venomous in the way he stared at her.
"It takes two stupid cats to start a stupid fight, Squirrelpaw!" Brambleclaw spat, his fur bristling with disgust. "Nobody here has the time to listen to you two acting like kits the whole journey!"
The Thunderclan apprentice scowled, whipping her tail in Crowpaw's direction. "Again, it's him who starts it."
"I don't care who started it!" Brambleclaw growled, his amber eyes blazing as he whipped back at her with fangs baring. Squirrelpaw couldn't stop herself from flinching, she could only hope the others hadn't noticed, especially Crowpaw. "You're going to be a warrior soon, Squirrelpaw, you should know when to walk away from a pointless fight." The warrior sighed bitterly, "Clearly, that lesson hasn't sunk in yet."
Squirrelpaw tried to hide the hurt she was feeling from listening to her clanmate openly scold her in front of the others. Even if they didn't look in her direction, it was impossible that they were ignoring Brambleclaw's yelling. Everyone of them was listening, and none of them were bothering to interject on her behalf. Their silence spoke the truth, they clearly all agreed with him.
They all thought she was a problem.
Biting down on her lip in embarrassment, she mustered up a glare to her clanmate. "Who are you to talk like you're some kind of leader? You don't even have an apprentice!" Squirrelpaw snarled.
The Thunderclan warrior's tail slacked a little, humiliated, but soon spiked in anger. "I might as well have one!" He said stiffly, "You always seem to be accompanying me, after all! Maybe I should make Dustpelt's day and tell him you're my apprentice now!"
"You're the one who said I could come?" Squirrelpaw was almost yowling now, she had never felt so angry in her entire life! "You could have said no! I wouldn't have cared a whisker!"
Brambleclaw didn't even bother to turn back. " Oh, of course! That's why you're the one who asked again and again. Besides, you would have followed us anyway or told Firestar at least." He muttered.
It seemed like an icicle had pierced through Squirrelpaw at those words. Her green eyes dimmed with hurt as she drew back slightly, stopping for a brief moment. He thought she would have told Firestar? He thought she would have betrayed the journey like that? All this time, he'd only agreed to let her come out of fear that she would jeopardise his mission out of spite. Was that how little he trusted her?
Even if Firestar was her father, she knew that whatever Starclan was telling the group was not his concern. She wouldn't have gone against them like that. Brambleclaw should have known that, he was right there when she argued with her father about how he had constantly been watching over her every move like a stalking owl, ready to criticise everything that she seemed to be doing wrong.
And Brambleclaw still thought she would have betrayed him?
"I-I wouldn't have told him anything!" Squirrelpaw exclaimed, attempting to sound more angry than hurt. "This could be important to every clan; I wouldn't have tried to stop that!"
Brambleclaw didn't say anything but Squirrelpaw could her him scoff scornfully. Her whiskers dropped.
'He really doesn't trust me. H-He's just like Firestar.'
Squirrelpaw felt someone brush at her side, looking up to see Tawnypelt giving her a sympathetic smile. "We know you wouldn't have." The Shadowclan warrior glanced harshly at her brother. "Pay no attention to him, he's just being mouse-brained. It's an unfortunate quality most toms have." Tawnypelt joked, offering a playful grin.
Squirrelpaw tried to accept the friendly gesture, but she couldn't get over Brambleclaw's coldness. His icy silence was way worse than anything he could say to her. A flush of embarrassed rage came to Squirrelpaw; Brambleclaw had made it out like she was latching onto his tail like a blood crazed tick!
"If that's how it is, then why don't I just go back now?" She dared with a hiss.
Brambleclaw only offered a dismissive whip of his tail. "Don't be dramatic. You're here now, and somehow, I don't think you'd head back without us."
'He doesn't even think it's my decision anymore!' Squirrelpaw realised. Her breath caught, trying to think of something else to say, but found her mouth dry and her throat tight. "You try and stop me!" She erupted, outraged. She looked up and saw that Bramblestar had begun to walk ahead again, discussing the trail with Stormfur. He clearly didn't think there was anything else to say to her.
Squirrelpaw's head dropped, ears lying flat against her head, her eyes glazing over, wounded and angry. He didn't give two claws about what she thought. And, despite every urge to go against his words, he was right, she couldn't turn back now. Not without them.
Suddenly, the journey didn't seem so exciting.
A few tail lengths away, Crowpaw watched the whole exchange, heck, practically saw the exact moment when the cockiness left the Thunderclan apprentice and she chose to, for once, keep her mouth shut. When it began, he couldn't help but enjoy watching Brambleclaw put the apprentice down a couple of steps. She'd been the one who'd chosen to join, if she couldn't face the truth, that was her problem.
He watched smugly, 'This might be the first time I actually agree with that bee brained warrior.' He thought. Squirrelpaw had been at odds with him every step of the journey, and as far as he was concerned, she was the cause of it all! Even if he wasn't the one delivering it, she needed to learn when to keep her mouth shut. Crowpaw should have been smirking.
But he felt, strangely, uncomfortable.
The flippant attitude of Brambleclaw and the way Squirrelpaw seemed to silently accept defeat. It felt unnatural. Granted, he'd only ever seen the apprentice either smirking or snarling at him, so it was different for the molly to actually be upset by something.
Crowpaw wasn't so sure he liked it.
The cold back of Brambleclaw reminded him of something… familiar. Someone. Crowpaw found himself frowning, his teeth gritting, as something clawed at the back of mind. Two voices. One young and angry. The other cold and distant. All while Crowpaw watched as Brambleclaw ignored Squirrelpaw's protests, seeing the apprentice shrink under the distance the warrior forced between them. Absently, he felt his ears press against his head in unease. Suddenly he felt himself scowling at Brambleclaw, for a reason he couldn't comprehend. He had always hated how Brambleclaw saw himself as the group's leader, but something else seemed to darken the cat to Crowpaw.
When Squirrelpaw began to slow in her pace, her fur and tail flat in melancholy thoughts, for the briefest moment, Crowpaw felt like he wanted to say something to the cat.
It was brief though, and Crowpaw eventually just frowned again and kept silent. It wasn't his business. She was only a Thunderclan cat in the end. He had no reason to care.
The voices at the back of his head made him think otherwise.
…
"But you promised!"
"I did not. I said we could if I wasn't busy. Right now, we're lower on prey, so I need to go hunting."
"But I wanted to practice with you!"
"Well, it'll have to wait. I can't just ignore the needs of the clan because you're impatient."
"You promised!"
"No, I didn't. Look, I'm sorry if you have to wait a little longer because I have to make sure the clan can survive through the winter! I can't help it if I'm busy!"
"You're always busy! You're never home!"
"I'm Deputy! You should already know how important that is! Stop raking your claws over nothing! You can practice with your siblings."
"But I don't want to!"
"Then don't! I don't care! Listen, Tallstar is calling me, I don't have time for this."
"You never have time for me! I hate you! One day I'm gonna run away into the forest and that will teach you!"
"The only thing that will teach me is how mouse-brained you actually are. Stop talking like a fool, you know very well you wouldn't last a day without me."
"I would! I don't need you! You hear me, I'd be better off without you. H-Hey! Stop ignoring me! Come back here! I-I hate you; you know that! I hate you!"
...
Thank you to swampyfwoggo for letting me use their beautiful art as my cover. Please go and check out their work on Tumblr and DeviantArt, they deserve some love!