WARNING: It's a bit fast in the beginning, but if you stick to it after 4 chapters, which is how long the Hunter Exam is in this fanfic, then you will not regret it - at least, in my opinion. Later on, this story will touch on some pretty heavy topics and will get really dark (BUT there will be no suicide, no rape, and no explicit sexual content). Romance will also be pretty slow, but will start to pick up in the middle of the series. Everyone's age has been bumped up to be around 2 years older than they are in the manga. This fanfic will follow events in both anime versions - the old and the new, and then will go AU (with the last arc) after Chimera Ants. And the order of the events in the story might change a little or the dates of the events might slightly differ from the manga or anime, depending on the flow and convenience of our story.

Hi everyone! It's been a while since I wrote another HxH fanfic, the last one being "Game of Balance." This time, I wrote this HxH fanfic with my best friend (ArashiYuki13), so this was a collaboration with her.

We already finished writing and editing the entire fanfic beforehand. So in total, this fanfic is around 500 pages, roughly speaking, and we started it on June 12, 2019.

Now... To explain the meaning behind the title... I view flames as a symbol of selfishness, because flames can either keep you warm or injure you. This is also the case with selfishness, which can affect others negatively a lot or a little. So a few of the main things about this fanfic is all about seeing or navigating through the different types of selfishness and its respective outcomes! I hope that makes sense to everyone.

Anyways, hope you enjoy reading this!

If updating once or twice a week, we will be updating this fanfic every Thursday and/or Friday (PST).

"" - speech

italics - thoughts/memory/dream

Disclaimer: I do not own Hunter x Hunter.

"Anou…" A young female, at the age of 15, stared at the terrorist hunter with a seemingly calm expression. "As long as I pass this Hunter Exam, I will…"

"Yes. At the very least, your talents will be put into great use and you can live a comfortable life… Well, whatever your definition of comfortable is." He furrowed his eyebrows. "Please understand that this is the most that I can do for you."

She gave him a wry smile, hiding any uncertainty and anxiety from the male. "I am grateful enough that you went this far for me."

An unexpectedly painful and guilty expression flickered on his face. "I have failed you and your family. This is the least I can do to make up for it."

She straightened her back and turned her heel to face the other direction. "It is no matter... After all, life moves on no matter what happens to me or anyone else. The only thing that matters is our choice to either learn from mistakes or to continue being in the vicious cycle once more." Her roughly cut black hair that barely went past her shoulders managed to hide her eyes from the terrorist hunter. She then looked up at the sky with her sharp amethyst purple eyes.

"M-" Before the terrorist hunter could continue his words, she immediately interjected in a clear-cut manner.

"Please call me, Arla…" Her facial expression never changed. He stiffened. It only served to remind him of the horrors she faced a few months ago.

"Ah, yes. Arla…" He gave a short awkward laugh. "Be careful at the exams. There are a lot of people with dark hearts who would be happy to corrupt or destroy you - the second you show weakness."

Her polite smile never wavered. "Lawrence. You always acted like a ruffian, but you truly have a good heart. Thank you for everything and I hope the next time our paths cross, you will feel relieved about who I am at that point in time and that you will finally have the peace that you deserve in your heart." She twirled around to face him and then curtsied to him properly for the last time, reminding her that this will be the final moment that reflected of her previous status.

As if responding to her feelings, he bowed to her in silence without giving her a reply. Once he saw the strong conviction in her eyes, he knew that she would be fine. Feeling a bit melancholy, he sighed and then turned around with a short wave. "Well, see you around then, Arla!"

"See you… Lawrence." And off she went - into the hidden area, to start the Hunter Exam.

"...Haha, so to welcome newbies like you to the Hunter Exam, I brought some orange juice with me!" Smiling in a naively crafted fake manner, Tonpa stopped speaking and offered a can over to Ai.

Blinking, Ai brightly laughed, swinging on her feet with her hands clasped as she pushed the drink away from her. "I mean, thank you, but I really, really, wouldn't want to be crapping out my junk in these tights, you know?"

"What?"

Grinning wider, Ai took slow carefree steps backwards and drew her gaze over to a scene of absolute carnage. "I mean, I like pooping and all - as long as it's not me doing the poop-a-poo. I saw that other guy going at it with his feces a while back, and while it was disturbingly hilarious, I would absolutely hate to be one in that position. I hope you understand, kind mister."

Looking at her incredulously Tonpa proceeded to cough into his hands, his eyebrow twitching. "I don't know what you're talking about, especially with that dirty language. It's the Hunter Exam, so I should've expected that from a young'in like you."

"Aww~ Dirty language?" Ai giggled into her hands, even though she was pretending to be a male. "I don't think my language can compare with its crudeness to the vulgarity of your intentions and actions." Ai gave a bright smile. "Perhaps I should make it clearer; I don't like orange juice, or laxatives for that matter, so bye bye, mister~"

Skipping away to a suitable distance, Ai looked back and forth, placing a hand over her chest and letting out a shuddery breath. "Oh my god, I really am here…! Oh god, I can't believe I didn't fall for that right now… I'm so glad for all of the TV shows I've watched with that newbie crushing thing… It's such a classic! I knew my TV show knowledge would come in handy one day," she whispered to herself ferociously, her eyes dancing like a parade.

"Rather than that, I think it's because you couldn't help but watch that poor guy drenched in his own diarrhea with that can." A figure transparent to all there but her made his stance apparent. "God, a person like you, I swear…" Leaving his words unfinished, he heaved a sigh, pushing back his messy brown hair.

"A person like me is great, right?" Ai grinned, the messy short hair visible from outside her cap jostling together with her bangs as she tilted her head.

The elusive figure stared for a moment too long before averting his gaze. "...If that's what helps you sleep at night."

Ai's smile twitched. "Smartass."

Wonka grinned. "Thanks for the compliment."

Blinking curiously at the bald man making a serious ninja pose, Ai skittered closer to him.

Peeking at him by his side through her bangs, Ai took a moment or longer to gape at him.

"Who are you and what do you want?" He asked through closed eyes.

Unsurprised, she, in a state of pre-affixed awe, questioned back, "Are you a ninja?"

The man finally looked at her - shocked - with an effectively serious expression following soon after; collaboratively with the shift in his expression, he uncrossed his arms and turned to loom over her. "Who are you, and how did you know that?"

Wonka started furiously warning her from above, but it did nothing to deter the fireworks in her eyes as she hopped on her toes. "I'm Shinichi, and I really, really love your country's culture! I always wanted to meet a samurai or a ninja in my life at least once; I really admire them!"

At that, he made a surprised noise from within his throat, blinking at her. "You… You admire ninjas?"

"Meow! Of course!" The response came without even a single beat or pause. "Ninjas are super cool because of their code of honour and awesome skills!"

"I-Is that so," Hanzo said, taking a step back as he coughed into his hand. "It's great that you admire us, but," he began, placing his index finger in the air and furrowing his brows in an attempt to be serious. "Me being a ninja is a secret, and no else can know about it, is that understood, Shinichi?"

Returning his seemingly serious expression, Ai nodded furiously while placing a finger over her lips. "Of course! You have my word. I will not speak of your identity to anyone here, mister!"

Wonka tilted his head back, letting a large tired sigh escape. "My god."

Hanzo proceeded to nod in approval. "You have my thanks, and you can call me Hanzo, not mister."

"Yay! Thank you, Hanzo-san!"

Meanwhile, Arla had been wandering around, effectively ignoring the stubby male who offered her a drink. When she was about to take down this male with words, she found herself bumping into the back of one of the contestants. His brown eyes flickered to her and she murmured her apologies instinctively.

"It's fine. No one was hurt." He only replied. She moved her head to the side in a curious manner, noting his nice blonde hair, before catching herself. It had been a while since she saw someone with blonde hair, despite it not being that rare. During her journey with Lawrence, it was more likely to see people with brown hair instead, which made her more comfortable. After all, in her country, blonde hair was the norm and black hair was an oddity. Shaking off her thoughts, she was about to dismiss herself from the small group.

Before she could go, however, a younger boy with long spiky black green tipped hair pulled at her arm sleeve. "Nee, what's your name?" His large hazel brown eyes sparkled with immense curiosity.

"..." Recovering from her shock at not noticing how close he got to her, she pulled herself together and gave him a warm polite smile. "Hello. My name is Arla. What is your name?"

"Gon Freecss! You can call me Gon! Nice to meet you, Arla!" His bright voice soothed the tension inside of her.

"I'm Leorio! Nice to meet you." The tallest male with glasses grinned at her. She blinked and nodded in acknowledgement.

"Kurapika." The man who she bumped into earlier muttered awkwardly.

"Ee… Nice to meet all of you too." She naturally put her hand over her chest and bowed slightly towards them while closing her eyes when doing so at a perfect angle. She forced her other hand to do nothing but lean against her side. After all, there was no need to do a curtsy anymore.

Once again, she was about to dismiss herself when Gon interrupted. "You should stay with us! It'll be a lot more fun that way!"

At those words, Leorio began to yell at Gon about how the Hunter Exams were a serious thing and that having fun was the last thing on their minds. Arla could not help but smile sadly. It reminded her of her brother and cousin, filling her with painful nostalgia and mixed happiness. Somehow in her subconscious, she did not want to lose the nostalgia inside of her, so her mouth moved on its own before she could even comprehend her own words. "Okay, I'll stay with you." Thankfully, she felt that he did not harbor any bad intentions towards her, so she did not say anything else to correct herself afterwards.

Leorio stopped yelling once he heard what she said and he sheepishly smiled at her. She smiled back politely as they then waited for the exams to start.

Whipping her head around, Ai nervously chuckled. "First exam in and we're already running…?"

Manifesting itself once again, the brown haired figure snorted from above her. "That wouldn't be so surprising if you kept yourself just a bit more in shape."

"Shut that mouth, Wonka," Ai hissed, her smile twitching as she began running.

"I really don't think you can look at your brother in the eye if you fail this marathon," Wonka said, grinning as he noticed another annoyed twitch of her lips. "Let alone help me pass along."

Scoffing, Ai rolled her eyes. "My brother has always been more of an intellectual, rather than a sportsman; I'll tell you. My skills and overall capabilities matter more than my very unfortunate lack of stamina…" She inhaled and then proceeded to breathe out, "unlike a macho brute like you."

"Please, tell this macho brute. What skills do you have to compensate for your 'unfortunate' stamina, Ai~?" Wonka smiled a sugary smile, his upbeat tone cruelly matching his words.

Ai did not respond, simply continuing on running clumsily with a moderate pace.

"I guess you don't have an answer. It's great that you at least have enough shame to stay quiet when you've lost. I'm sure your brother or helping me pass on would be the least of your worries, though, if you fail this exam, considering how you just up and left the church. I'm sure the Father isn't very happy-"

"Didn't I," Ai huffed. "...tell you," she huffed again. "...to shut…UP," she strained out, her expression contorting the more she spoke.

"Are you actually already tired?" Wonka circled her in his fluid form with genuine surprise. "Wow, with this, you really will fail this."

Once again, she did not respond; the only indication of her listening was the worsening of her expression that slowly turned into a frown.

"You know," Wonka began, placing his ghostly hands on Ai's shoulders. "I could always lend you my abilities," he whispered, despite knowing no one else could hear them.

Observing her wordless clumsy running for a moment longer, he allowed a gleaming smile to stretch across. "I'm sure you remember… how before I died, my exceptional ability to run long distances for such a long amount of time without stopping was plentifully awarded. You do, don't you, Ai?"

Of course she did. She found him numbly standing over the innumerous awards - his innumerous awards, dyeing the area a grievous residue of his aura. She also remembered how his mother continued to sob just behind him and how the Father's deceivingly fervent prayers echoed throughout the room.

He was the son of a family friend, one whom she'd never met until then, but she was the only one who could see him - so he stuck around, just like the many others who did before eventually moving on.

"I… I…" She huffed, breathless and dizzy. "I DON'T TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT."

Wonka cringed at her unstable voice, which gave out at the end.

Many around her eyed Ai strangely, but it was beyond her notice; her breathlessness increased and legs turned wobbly - an effect of her reckless shout.

"Your voice just cracked. I think you're experiencing puberty, congrats." Wonka stared sarcastically at her, popping an eyebrow.

"Shut... u…" Without the air needed to complete her intended crude order, Ai allowed the implications to lay in her heavy scowl, even with her breathlessness.

Wonka floated around her as if pacing with his arms crossed. "You can hear it, can't you? What everyone else is saying?" he asked, not about the examinees, but about all the other souls, their residues and the racket they collectively made. "It's better if you take my suggestion. You should understand that all I'm giving you is a little push. It's your body whose limits are going to be tested. I'm not the one running here, Ai. It'll still be you."

"...N…o…"

"...Are you serious?" Wonka face-palmed and then rolled his eyes. "You're going to give up this exam for your stupid bit of pride even when you yourself know how stupid it is? You know it's you who'll be running. Just because I'll be lifting the brake limits of your body a little doesn't mean anything. Why do you have to be so stubborn-"

And then it all clicked.

Pausing for a moment, Wonka eyed Ai. "...If this is because of last time when I screamed about your, er, womanly, uh, cramps, then I don't think you have to worry."

Ai slowed her down her running, her bangs covering her eyes in a shadow.

"...Okay, fine, I'm sorry." Wonka sighed. "Besides, your body is too tired for me to even say anything coherent anyways, so it'll be fine…" With another sigh, he resigned himself.

Slowly coming to a stop and earning looks from the people around her at that, Ai took in quick and deep breaths to even out her breathing.

And then she looked up, her legs shaking and breathing still rough and awful - but her eyes terrifyingly sparkled and shook. "Meow! Do it, Willy Wonka!"

Wonka glared at her. "For the last time, my name isn't...!"

"...WILLY WONKA," Ai finished, her eyes taking on a strange look.

Instantly, with a long-winding shaky scream, she blasted off into the crowd. It earned her more strange looks for, very much, the third time.

"What the fuck?" One of the macho men whispered to himself as she sped off and out of his sight way too quickly for a human.

"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPS!"

"WILLY WONKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'S WILLYYYYYYYYYY IS NILLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!"

"AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

During the beginning of the First Phase, a boy with the same age as Gon, whose name is Killua, joined their group. While they ran, she noticed how his white hair made him stand out and the way his sharp blue eyes examined everyone with speed and focus.

Soon, the younger male's eyes fell on her. To make him feel a little more comfortable, she decided to warmly smile at him before focusing on her run once more. However, during that short amount of time, she felt that her smile had, perhaps, caught him off-guard with the way his eyes seemed to widen by just a centimeter. 'But then again... That could have been my imagination.' She smiled sheepishly to herself. After all, she realized during her interactions with the group that she had severely missed having company after being with the silent Lawrence for a pretty long time. 'So my observations and my interpretation of it could be wrong.'

'But this is quite nice...to be with people who are younger than me.' Even though she had the same or perhaps similar age as Kurapika, she felt more comfortable and safe around Gon and Killua, instead of the other two males. 'I don't have to guess what their intentions are towards me as much. Although...'

She knew in her heart from her interactions with them so far that the other two males were not bad people. Unfortunately though, it had been instilled into her since she was small by her brother and cousin that males tended to have secret motives if they approached a female. This made it difficult for her to let down her guard around them. 'But it does not mean that they hold bad intentions towards me. I will just have to make more of an effort to let down my guard around them...at my own pace.'

"So how old are you, Arla?" Gon asked, interrupting her thoughts, as Killua pretended to not listen to what Arla would say next.

She paused, hoping that her age would not disconnect her from the two younger people. "I am fifteen years old." She observed the two carefully after replying.

"Hmm…" Killua let out an 'I see' type of sound. "So you're two years older than me." His tone held slight disinterest, which made her feel relieved.

She let out a small sigh and continued to run along with them. "Ah, yes." She replied, giving the two a sheepish smile.

"You don't feel like your age though." The white-haired boy continued to comment. "You seem like you're the same age as us - thirteen." He watched her carefully, noticing that she did not really react much to his words. It was as though she was not bothered by anything he said, which felt nice for once. 'She's kinda easy to talk to... Although she's a bit quiet and calm, compared to Gon.' He did not touch upon the fact that he felt as though he could talk to her about anything and she would not judge him for who he was or is, very much in his thoughts. After all, it was an unfamiliar thought to him, which was why he continued to keep a watchful eye on her, during the conversation - to decide if she really was safe. "...Not to mention, your height is the same as mine."

She let out a distinct sigh at the comment about her height. "Yes, my height… I know… I'm probably going to be this height for the rest of my life."

"...Ah." She had unintentionally let out her true thoughts and feelings about her height. 'But then again... It is still a sore spot for me in some ways... I suppose I do not enjoy hearing any comments about my height.'

Killua let out a small amused smile. "I think it's a good height for a girl." He then shrugged as they focused on their run again.

"Un! It is a good height since males usually prefer shorter girls!" Arla blinked when Gon said that aloud. She felt as if he had said a very amazing thing just now.

'I want to ask him...but that would be weird...but I want to know...' She desperately wanted to ask him how he knew that to be true, but in the end, she kept her question to herself. After all, there were just some things that you did not ask someone, as stated once by her older brother.

Once Killua and Gon dashed off for a race, Arla soon ran with Kurapika and Leorio.

"I already said it before, but I want to become a Hunter, so that I can capture the Genei Ryodan - because they killed my Clan." Kurapika clenched his fists tightly as he ran.

"Is this for revenge?" She glanced at him before concentrating on her run again.

He paused briefly. "...Yes."

She looked a bit sad when hearing this. 'Revenge, huh...' Nevertheless, she never stopped running.

Kurapika, however, looked over at Leorio. "Leorio, tell me the truth and do not lie this time. I have told you my reasons and will not forgive you if you do not tell me the truth. Why do you want to become a Hunter?" He asked as they both gasped for air. "I have seen people who only wanted money and they are nothing like you."

"Tch, I want money! That's the most important thing in life!" Leorio yelled out.

Arla only observed him with amusement.

"You-" Kurapika sharpened his gaze.

"Because if I had money, then my friend wouldn't have to die!" Leorio continued. "That's why money is the most important - because if I had money, I wouldn't have to accept any payments from the poor. So if I become a Hunter and then a doctor, then I can just heal them! No one would have to be in the same situation as my friend and myself!"

Arla's eyes widened. 'He is...' She looked at him with respect. '-a rare type of person.'

"Leorio…" Kurapika smiled with respect and approval.

"That is a wonderful goal to have, Leorio." Arla also smiled at him. "I hope you become a Hunter, so that you can become the doctor that you want to be."

"Thanks, Arla." Leorio grinned before gasping for more air.

Uncomfortable was an understatement for what that poor purple-haired examiner felt. As the strange girl for some godforsaken reason crossdressing as a guy continued to obsessively run behind him with heavy grunts and groaning, and the bonus occasional nonsensical yelling, he wondered if hunters were allowed to go to the police to get a restraining order.

Because he felt like he really needed one right now.

Even as he saw the light of the tunnel getting closer, he did not feel much relief.

After all, being tailed by a wild beast in a marshy and foggy land felt like a move towards the worse for his discomfort.

Yes, he would call Netero right after this exam and ask him himself if he was allowed to get a restraining order...

"Yaaaaaaaaay!"

Momentarily, he had his eyes drawn to the two boys who beat him to the marshy lands, and as they proceeded to argue about who won, Satotz watched with mild fondness.

Until, he recalled with a shiver - the beast uncomfortably close behind him.

He cautiously moved away, giving a vague answer to the debate the two boys were having about who won.

"Ehhhh!" Pouting, Gon instead turned his attention to the trembling and panting beast. "Hey!" The black haired boy called out to her with a bright smile, whilst Killua grimaced.

"Did you see which one of us made it out first? I'm sure I did!"

As she continued to pant heavily, face absolutely red with sheer effort and legs absolutely shaking, blubbering noises left her.

A confused expression made its way to Gon's face. "Huh?"

"God, I doubt this weirdo had enough energy to focus on who came first, just… Look at them."

Ai continued blubbering.

Once they began to run through Milsy Wetlands, Killua warned them to stay close to Satotz since Hisoka will probably use the mist as a cover to satiate his bloodlust. Arla decided to take his advice seriously as she knew that her stamina would not last long if she slowed down anyways.

She had to continue to push herself.

At that very moment, she found herself being sincerely grateful towards Lawrence for training her like a spartan for a long time, even during his service to her family.

However, it was only a few minutes into the run when they heard Leorio scream from behind them. In seconds, Gon quickly turned around - intent on saving his friends.

"G-" Before Arla could call out his name, he had already left. She had no choice but to stick with Killua for the rest of their run. Her heart palpitated hard and her palms felt sweaty from the anxiety she was feeling for the group behind them.

"That idiot!" Killua muttered under his breath.

She, on the other hand, felt sad that she might never see Gon and the others again.

"Let's go without them, Arla." Killua's voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Ah, okay." She whispered and nodded in agreement, focusing on the runners in front of them.

For a second, however, she thought about helping Gon and the others before convincing herself that she could not help anyone until she could help herself.

"Are you going to use your skateboard, Killua-s… I mean, Killua." She almost called him, Killua-san, but managed to catch herself, remembering that he asked her to call him Killua when they first met.

"Do you want me to?" He quietly asked.

"...Well… I would prefer if you did not because I cannot run at the same speed as your skateboard unfortunately." She breathed out, matching her pace with Killua. "However, it is ultimately your decision."

"...You know… If you just want to stick with me, just say that, instead of being so elaborate about it." Her eyes widened a little at his words as she watched his back. The thought that her careful speaking style could potentially irritate someone never occurred to her, considering that it was the norm back at her country.

"...You are right. Since I want to be Killua's friend, I will stick with you!" She decided to tell him straightforwardly. "And I also want to be Gon's, Kurapika-san's, and Leorio-san's friend!"

It would be her first time - her first time making friends without any pressure or wariness.

There was nothing that could hold her back anymore.

He almost paused in his step from her sudden outburst but he continued without completely stopping.

She could then hear him mutter to her, "You're so weird."

Contrary to his odd choice of words, he slowed down just a little bit, running right next to her - instead of in front of her. She also noticed how he controlled his facial expression to the finest details in order to hide how he truly felt, so she could not pick up much from him.

Nevertheless, she only hoped that he felt the same as her. So she gave him another warm smile before breathing heavily from the tiring run.

Coming to a slow stop after they arrived at their 'next destination,' Ai heaved as she collapsed.

"Wow, you were in worse shape than I thought," Wonka said, having exited her body a mere 5 seconds ago.

As Ai took in heavy breaths, trembling as she held herself up with her arms; sweat continuously dripped down her face.

And then she heaved again; this time, something more than air came out.

"Oh my," Wonka casually commented, sparing no pity in his eyes or voice as he observed her.

As she continued pushing out unsightly juices and garnering more attention from the surviving hunter examinees, Wonka whistled.

"I don't think it's healthy to lose that many bodily fluids."

"You're…" Ai retched. "not…" Another sob-filled retch. "HELPING!..."

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