Chapter 1: Pain

Pain.

Unadulterated pain

JJ couldn't feel or think about anything else as she first awoke that morning. Her brain was foggy, and her eyes felt like they were being held shut by duct tape. With a loud groan, JJ struggled to sit up from her bed. Shocks of pain radiated up and down the back of her head. Still, her eyes refused to open, and her brain struggled to gain focus or even stay conscious.

JJ laid her head back down on the pillow for a few more minutes. She counted her breaths slowly.

In and out…..in and out.

Again she tried sitting up. With a bit more avail, JJ sat up and laid against her pillows supported by the headboard. Her eyes fluttered open, and she inhaled another deep breath.

She managed to keep her eyes open and considered that a win. She reached over to her nightstand to grab her phone- but it wasn't where it usually was. JJ turned her head to look and didn't see her phone anywhere in sight. After realizing her phone was missing, her gaze found the time on her bedside clock.

9:42 am

"Shi-" JJ muttered under her breath with an interjected sigh.

It dawned on her how late she was for work. She crawled out of bed as quickly as she could, but in reality, it was probably the equivalent of a beached whale attempting to shimmy back into the water. She took precautions as she moved due to the pounding in her head. After she tumbled out of bed, she moved out to the kitchen for a large glass of water and two extra-strength Tylenol.

JJ swished the cool liquid around before walking back to her room to put on the first clothes she found. The lucky items being black slacks and a simple button-down shirt. She pulled her hair into a loose, low braid- something that wouldn't cause too much pressure on her head. If she had more time to worry, she might be more concerned about the level of pain in her head, but she had somewhere to be.

Without looking in the mirror, JJ jumped in her car and drove to the office. Ordinarily, she would be horrified at her lack of effort towards her appearance. She prided herself in her ability to always be so put together. That notion went out the door.

It'd been a weird start to the day, and little did she know it had only just begun.

JJ shot past security and up to the BAU conference room. She ignored the surprised looks and ran past the people that tried to stop her to talk.

She didn't have time.

She strolled up the ramp and saw the team sitting around the conference table. No one noticed her presence until she tried sitting in her open seat, the closet one to the door.

"I'm really sorry for being late-" JJ started before being attacked by a bear hug from Garcia sitting next to her. She felt the wet tears on her shoulder before she heard the violent sobs.

"JJ, I can't beli- where have you…are you okay?" Emily started trying to ask all the questions she was thinking while wet tears slipped down her cheeks.

JJ's brows furrowed in confusion. She could count on one hand how many times she'd seen Emily cry. Each time had been traumatic and so emotionally draining, she couldn't figure out what about this situation deserved that reaction.

"What's going on? Why are you crying?" She asked simply.

JJ's eyes scanned the room, slowly focusing on every team member and their utterly shocked expressions. The room fell silent as everyone struggled to comprehend what was happening.

Hotch fought to keep his emotions in check, something usually innately second nature of him, "JJ, how did you get here?"

JJ's face contorted in an expression that could only be labeled as confusion. She watched each member of her team look her up and down- examining every part of her.

Later she'd look in the mirror and find that they were reacting to how disheveled she appeared. She had lingering bruises marking her face and nearly every part of her skin that was visible. Her hair was tastled and looked like it hadn't been washed in weeks.

Spencer Reid's breath caught in his throat as his emotions took hold. They had been searching for JJ for what felt like a lifetime after she had gone missing without a trace. The team had been working 24/7 to find her- to no avail. They had exhausted all leads, they refused any other cases, and they denied the idea that their friend was gone.

And here she was...sitting here like it was a typical day. Like they hadn't seen her for the first time in weeks; like they hadn't gone back and forth with devastating hope and despair.

It was unreal. Some were overtaken with emotions like Garcia and Reid, while Hotch and Derek sat with cold, expressionless faces. Probably fighting the urge to yell or bombard JJ with a million questions.

JJ struggled to answer Hotch's question. "I uh-I got here like normal?"

He paused before following up with, "what do you remember from the last couple of days?"

JJ's brow furrowed again. She had remembered the morning. She remembered the pain, and she remembered thinking about how weird it felt. It wasn't until Hotch questioned her that she realized she had zero short term memory. She couldn't remember yesterday, the day before, or anything before that.

She recognized her team, remembered her job, and other important long term memories, but it felt like anything from the last month, or two was blank.

"I don't know ...I can't remember anything." JJ's hand went to her forehead and ran through her hair. Her worry became evident as her breathing began to increase, and her hands shook.

Emily rushed to her side. "It's okay, take a deep breath." JJ listened and tried focusing on her breathing again. "We're just glad you're okay, well, mostly." She turned to look at Hotch. "I think we need to take her to the hospital for an exam."

Hotch nodded his head in agreement while the rest of the team stood up to follow suit.

"No, wait a second. Tell me what's going on?" JJ adamantly questioned.

The team shared some concerned looks before Emily ultimately spoke first.

"Jayje, nearly four weeks ago, you went missing from your house. We've been looking non-stop for you. We're a bit confused as to how your here." Emily paused for a moment. "We're going to take you to the hospital to get some…," her gaze looked up and down JJ's frail body, examining the surface wounds, "help with your injuries."

JJ refused to look at her friends as she struggled to intake the information. She slowly nodded her head while allowing Emily to help her out of her seat.

This is just the start! I'm so excited for this fic & I'd love to hear what you think. Things will definitely be getting more interesting starting in the next chapter. There will be memories of violence and other things that may be trigger warnings. Please read with caution and take care of yourself!