A/N: I have no idea what I've done, but I've done it. If you missed the genre tag, I'll tell you now that this is 100% parody, with humor, love, and adventure thrown into the mix. The first two chapters of this story will be more of an introduction to the Mary Sue, so sorry if the beginning seem a little slow, and too little Mary Sue-y. This is not a part of the Tales of the Morningstar series.

Note that I'm not making fun of anyone in particular by writing this. It's simply to cure my own writer's block, it's been nagging me for a while now. Also note that if you have included any of the stuff I'm putting in my parody in your story, it doesn't mean it's a poorly developed Mary Sue fanfic, it's just an element I included in my story because I wanted to. Disclaimer regarding all my fanfiction work is in my bio. Enjoy.

Summary:

I present to you, the Lord of the Rings: How it Really Happened. Featuring the amazing, the magical, the awesome, Ailyeranda Narindella! This little story has it all, a 10th walker, high Mary Sue factor, a dazzling half-god/fae/elf/dragon/mage, and love! Lots and lots of love packed in short, underdeveloped chapters (because no chapter could ever be long enough to contain Ailyeranda's greatness;)) Witness her story from amazing to great, when she embarks on a journey to save Middle-earth once and for all!

Chapter 1, An Unexpected Kidnapping

Bright light completely clouded her eyesight, as she was pulled towards what first seemed like a regular tree. It had been just like you would expect, brown, with green leaves and a thick trunk. However, as her fingers graced its bark, it had, well, she wasn't really sure what it did, but it did something, and she wasn't having it! With a shriek, she tried to pull her hand away. Ailyeranda found herself drawn to the tree, which was now expanding, and oddly enough filled her vision with a dazzling, white, godly light.

And that was it. She was gonna die, she knew it. There was no way expanding trees meant good fortune. Before she knew it, the feeling of being pulled closer to the tree became more than a simple thug. Oh no, quite the opposite. It was like she had a whole army pressing on her back, pushing her closer and closer. She put on her bravest face yet. With a determined look and a will of iron, she was prepared to meet whatever lay beyo—ah who the eff am I kidding… she wasn't ready, not in the slightest. A tree was about to consume her, she was terrified. The girl shut her eyes and was expecting to see none other than her dead grandmother behind the curtains of white light. End of discussion.

HOwEvEr(!) that was not the case, not this time, no. As she seemed to float in thin air, surrounded by nothing than that previously mentioned godly light, a voice called out to her. It was deep, and belonged to a man. It sounded like he was in her head, right next to her, and a million miles away. All at the same time. She couldn't place that voice at all, but it spoke to her nonetheless.

Ailyeranda Narindella, at last you will fulfill your prophesied destiny. I am Eru, the God over Gods, and you are the Hero over Heroes. The Valar can only do so much, but you are destined for great things. Middle-earth needs you!

The voice was gone as fast as it came, and she surely wasn't familiar with that Eru dude, but he seriously needed to drop the dramatics. I mean, who would bother with both sound effects and special props. In all honesty, he could've just texted. Here she was, on what seemed like the exact same forest floor, with an aching butt and a dizzy head, all for nothing.

Once she'd gotten a hang of her whereabouts, she started to head home. A cold glass of cola, filled to the brim, accompanied by crushed ice cubes, sounded like heaven right now.

And it was heaven indeed, for she walked and walked and walked and (well, you get the drill), however, home was nowhere to be found. The trees looked the same, the air was filled with that same fresh, grassy smell, but something felt off. Like she could simply feel something was amiss. Must be the sign of a headache forming. She seemed to have walked for hours, and the sun had even started to disappear behind the trees.

"I give up!" With a frustrated sigh, she sat down next to the trunk of a tree, and simply waited. Only the Valar knew exactly what she was waiting for, though. It wasn't like some messenger from the Gods would just appear out of nowhere and—

"My Lady Ailyeranda Narindella! At last you have blessed us with your company. Please, my Lady, would you be so kind as to grace me with the utmost honor of allowing a mere Elf like me to escort you safely to your home?"

Yeah, okay, nope, this was not happening. What kind of cruel joke was this? Ailyeranda looked quizzically on the man before her. He was clad in odd, otherworldly clothes. He had long hair, most unusual for a guy, and literally everything about him screamed 'non-human being'... Then again, Ailyeranda was never one to back down! So she got up on her feet, and followed the odd-looking man back to what she hoped was her home.

A/N: If you've reached this far, lemme tell ya that as soon as she 'LeaRNs WhO SHe ReALLy iS' (which'll happen soon enough) she'll get her god-mode on. For now, though, she's just a scared girl in the woods who wants to go home. I'd appreciate it if you (yeah, you right there!) left a review, telling me what you think so far. 'Till next time!