Written for the Scavenger Hunt at the Golden Snitch
Special thanks to Dessie, for beta-ing this for me!
word count: 568
Walk straight ahead until guilt makes you turn
Before he leaves the Hogwarts Grounds forever, Theodore turns around one last time, not really knowing what he is actually looking for.
Everything seems different… He doesn't even have the right words to describe it. 'Strange' and 'empty' are the first ones that come to his mind when he lets his glance wander over to the castle behind him.
The main parts of it had been destroyed in the great battle that had taken place only several hours ago. Enormous rocks, stones and other things he cannot make out, that had probably been dislocated by several explosions, are lying all over the bridge he is currently standing in front of. (He has to reach the other side, which isn't easy; he has to step over everything on his way and sometimes he will have to jump over a part that looks quite unsteady. If his mother saw him now – going to walk on a half destroyed bridge – she would probably turn around in her grave.)
Theodor misses his mother, but he still starts walking. He feels hollow on the inside and doesn't really know what to do since the Dark Lord has been defeated by Harry bloody Potter, and the side he had been fighting for lost the fight. It is the first time he is grateful for having been a loner for most of his school years. This way he is spared the frustration, sorrow and tears that most of the survivors live through right now. (Well, his father had been killed, but honestly, he cannot care less. A man, who ignores his son during his whole childhood and has been imprisoned in Azkaban for years, is in Theo's opinion not worthy of the term 'father'.)
Suddenly he trips and he falls flat on the ground. He looks up and an unexpected wave of nausea hits him upon staring right into the empty eyes of a dead boy. Theo quickly crawls backwards, but doesn't get up again. Somehow, his legs feel paralyzed so instead, he just sits there – on one of the rocks – and for some reason he can't tear his eyes away from him.
He unwillingly swallows hard when he sees that the boy's robes are dirty and they are covered in blood like the rest of him. Theo feels a lump rise in his throat. He knows the boy; he's a muggleborn Gryffindor. (And suddenly, he feels his heart grow heavy. He really disliked being around people that didn't understand the importance of blood-purity. But seeing the boy like this makes him wonder.)
For the first time, Theodore thinks about the consequences of the war. He had been told, first by his father and then other Death Eaters, that they were fighting for the greater good. But now, he isn't so sure about it anymore.
Heavy hearted, Theodore tears his eyes away from the boy and looks ahead. He was sitting right at the beginning of the bridge . The bridge is long and now he sees that right there, on his way, in between the rocks and stones are more bodies. Bodies of all the people who had lost their lives. Bodies whose death he was partly responsible for. (He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and starts walking again. But deep down he fears that he will turn back half way across, because of all the guilt that will flash over him.)