A/N: YO my DUDES what is up! So I'm not dead. I'm just a depressed college kid now with waaaaay too much time on my hands and now here I am. Once again. Ngl haven't been on fanfiction in quite some time and it's really bringing me back to middle school (yikes).

So. I was looking through this story and. OOF. Big oof. Now, I don't remember much from the warriors series but I don't think this story is right? Like it doesn't make sense? IDK what I was expecting because, again, I was a middle schooler- a BABY- but still. Jesus.

Needless to say Imma be changing some things up. Sorry Brambleshadow of WindClan but this story is getting a makeover and I don't know how true it will stay to their original story. Since this story WAS supposed to be their story I will try my hardest to include what they wrote into mine but. No promises.

ALSO! V important! I remember only the bare bones of the warrior cats series. Honestly I only have very vague memories of what is even happening at this point in the books. I have no clue what was going on before Hollyleaf had a breakdown at the Gathering or afterwards so take everything with a grain of salt. If I mention something that hasn't happened yet or have characters that aren't their accurate ages or personalities just let me know (that is assuming anyone will even read this lol).

Sorry for the long A/N but I felt like I needed to say a couple things before I could jump back into the story. I forgot how much I hate the format on this site.

It had been almost a quarter moon since that fateful Gathering and Leafpool still felt like she was drowning underwater. She was strangely detached from everything around her, as if she were simply a spectator to the drama that was now her life. The world seemed like it was moving at a snail's pace and yet, at the same time, flew past faster than a rabbit.

Now, Leafpool may be many things, but a mouse-brain was not one of them. She knew what was happening- she would have been a poor medicine cat if she did not. She was in shock. True, she had never had a patient who suffered from shock for as long as she currently was, but, given the circumstance, the brown tabby felt she deserved some slack.

Deserve? A nasty voice sneered from the back of her mind, sounding vaguely like her daughter, the only thing you deserve is death, and what did you do when I offered it to you? You turned it down. You think you deserve some slack?! Look at what you did! My brothers are now ostracized from the clan because of your mistakes! We have had our lives ripped to shreds! I'm DEAD because of you!

Vaguely, Leafpool recognized she was falling into an anxiety attack. The medicine cat in her was unconsciously making a list of her symptoms: increased heart rate, lightheadedness, claws unsheathed, ears pinned against her head, fur standing on end, unsteady breaths that were too shallow to do anything oh great StarClan I can't breathe I ca n'tbreatheIcan'tbreathe-

"-fpool? Leafpool? Can you hear me? Leafpool, I need you to breathe for me. Can you do that for me? Take a deep breath in, just like this." The voice, how long have they been there and why did they sound so familiar?, took an exaggerated deep breath in before noisily letting it out. "Just like that, can you copy me?"

Leafpool tried to take a deep breath and immediately started coughing. In-between her hacks, she could hear whoever was trying to help her move forward as if to touch her and then shift away as if they were unsure if they could come closer. Unable to talk, the brown tabby leaned towards where she thought the other cat, possibly a she-cat?, was. Instantly she felt the mystery cat press against her side and start grooming her face and neck, trying to calm her down. Gradually, Leafpool was about to move from coughing to heavy panting, then finally to normal, if a bit unsteady, breathing. Going boneless, Leafpool melted into the side of her helper, taking in their scent for the first time. Squirrelflight.

The two littermates stayed curled up together, Squirrelflight grooming Leafpool the entire time until the small tabby felt secure enough to pull away. Pulling back, Leafpool lifted her tired amber eye to meet the green ones across from her. Leaning forward, Leafpool licked her sister's cheek in gratitude.

"Thank you."

"You know you don't have to thank me for helping you," Squirrelflight headbutted Leafpool's shoulder lightly, "You're my sister. I'll always help you."

"That's just it though!" Leafpool exclaimed, jumping to her paws. "You always help me and look at what happened! It's ruined both of our lives and those around us! Brambleclaw won't even talk to you anymore because of what I made you do! Lionblaze and Jayfeather hate both of us! And Holl-" Leafpool cut herself off, unable to continue that train of thought. She did not want another anxiety attack, not again. "By helping me, you've lost your mate, kits, and the respect of your clan. How can you still stand to be around me? I've destroyed your life!"

The ginger she-cat sprang to her paws as well, glaring at the smaller tabby. "First of all, you never made me do anything. No one, not even you, dear sister, have been able to make me do anything I don't want to do. Second of all, you didn't ruin my life. Yes, things are less than ideal right now. Yes, Brambleclaw and my… our kits aren't talking to me, but life goes on! Besides… Leafpool you gave me the one chance I had to be a mother. You know I can't have a litter of my own. Your kits… your kits were the closest I will ever come to having my own. Even knowing what I know now, I wouldn't change anything. Those moons raising them, they make everything worth it. Even if Brambleclaw, Lionblaze, and Jayfeather never talk to me again, it will all be worth it. My only regret is what happened to…" She trailed off, eyes going distant as she thought about the young black she-cat that joined StarClan far, far too early.

Seeming the snap herself out of her thought, Squirrelflight gave herself a full-body shake. "Now, enough of this. Let's head back to camp, ok? What were you even doing out here anyway?"

Leafpool looked at her surroundings for the first time, looking as lost as her sister. She was at the tree line looking out at the lake.

"I honestly can't remember," Leafpool mumbled, slightly embarrassed.

Squirrelflight let out a merrf in amusement.

"Come on, mouse-brain, back to camp for you."

The dark ginger she-cat started to trot away, bushy tail waving in the air before realizing her sister was not following. Turning her head, she looked back at the tabby. Jabbing out her white paw, she called, "um, the camp is this way you lazy furball."

Leafpool kept her eyes on the lake. Scuffing her front paws, the pale brown tabby ducked her head towards the ground. Still not looking at the other she-cat, Leafpool replied, "Head back to camp without me. I'll head back soon; I want some alone time right now."

Narrowing her sharp green eyes, Squirrelflight fixed Leafpool with a searching stare. After a couple of heartbeats, she reluctantly nodded. Walking away, she threw over her shoulder, "If you're not back by nightfall, I'm calling a search party for you. Don't think I won't!"

Leafpool stayed still for several moments, making sure she was truly alone. Once a significant time had passed, she turned her amber gaze to the left, staring in the direction of WindClan. Ever since the Gathering, she had managed to avoid going close to that border. However, for some reason, she felt drawn to it, almost as if something was calling for her. Unbeknownst to her, she started walking in that direction. She only realized she was walking when she heard the sound of rushing water.

How did I end up here! She wondered. I need to head back to camp immediately, if someone sees me at the WindClan border by myself I'll be in even more trouble than I already am! Nevertheless, now that the tabby was here, she was reluctant to leave. I suppose a couple of minutes wouldn't hurt anyone… it's not like a patrol is scheduled to head by anytime soon.

Decision made; Leafpool climbed to the top of a nearby hill by the river. Sitting down, she curled her sleek tail over her paws as she looked out into WindClan territory. I wonder what Crowfeather is doing…. I hope he isn't in any trouble from the Gathering, after all, he didn't know. What he said at the Gathering, about her, about their kits, hurt more than she thought it would. However, she knew he was lying. At least, she hoped he lied. The Crowfeather she knew would not have meant that, but it had been many moons and cats can change.

For one brief moment, Leafpool wished she could see him again, alone, to ask what he truly felt about the revelation. Ha! I doubt he would even want to talk to me right now. Regardless, Leafpool closed her eyes and let herself dream. If she concentrated, she could pretend she could even smell him….

Shaking her head at her own silliness, the pale brown tabby rose to her paws and turned around, pointedly not looking into WindClan territory. As she started to pad away, she could have sworn she heard Crowfeather call her name faintly. Rolling her eyes at herself, she wondered if she was going crazy.

Leafpool made it to the bottom of the hill when she heard a massive splash in the river behind her. Startled, the small tabby whipped around but was unable to see anything due to the hill. Racing around the side, Leafpool was unprepared for what she saw on the other side. There, standing in a, thankfully, shallow part of the river, was the dark grey tom she had been thinking about, coat now black from the water.

"Leafpool…" Crowfeather whispered, his blue eyes staring into hers with a look of relief and… was that love the tabby saw, or was she merely projection her own emotions?