Breath in. Breath out.

It was happening.

Looking at herself in the full-length mirror, Lucy Heartfilia finally felt what she expected she would experience weeks ago- stress. Stress from the waiting, stress from the planning, stress from the whole situation. And nervosity, panic. And most of all, fear. This shit was big. Bigger than she thought and bigger than she has ever wanted it to be. She always told herself that she knew what she wanted, what she has strived to achieve. She had it all figured out. She had a plan and she wanted to experience it all.

She wanted to live.

She was in charge. And for quite some time she believed it, too. That was one of the reasons she ran away. In her father's mansion, she existed. She just...was. On her own, as her own person, she lived.

It wasn't perfect. It was scary, it was smelly, sometimes it downright sucked and it frightened the heck out of her blonde butt. At home she never took care of anything, she never had to put on her own clothes or, god forbid, prepare her own food. That was unbecoming of a lady. And now she suddenly had to buy food. And cook. And clean. And do laundry. Then there were living expenses and clothing expenses and travelling expenses and about a gazillion of other expenses that had to be covered if she wanted to survive. Nobody would give her anything for free, everything cost money - money which she did not have anymore. But Lucy Heartfilia was nothing if not resilient and even in that new world she learned to live. She made mistakes, wrong choices and whatnot. She hurt a lot and loved a lot and that caused her to hurt a lot more. Maybe she could have done a better job. Smooth the edges, clear the wrinkles - improve the overall picture. Maybe her father's way would have been easier. But after breaking the chains of her childhood she absolutely refused to let anyone else rule over her. She has longed for that freedom for far too long.

Fairy Tail gave it all to her.

Nobody ordered her around, nobody organized her life - she was able to do anything and everything she wanted to do. All the options, all the possibilities - she finally stepped over the fence that kept her in. So many doors to open, so many paths to take. It was her own story, handwritten by her own choices, and she found the writing exhilarating. There were no ridiculous expectations to live up to and no pressure to behave in a certain way. Fairy Tail accepted Lucy as she was - with all her virtues and all her vices, and for that, she would be forever grateful. After the years of repression and strict discipline meant to 'root out her unacceptable traits', and make her into a proper pretty little doll, she was finally starting to see that she was perfect the way she was. She could be herself, freely and unabashedly, with the knowledge that there was always someone who was rooting for her. Who believed in her finding her own way, shape and form of happiness. In Fairy Tail, Lucy was loved, not despite all her mistakes but because of them.

In Fairy Tail, Lucy was able to be fully… Lucy. In Fairy Tail, the new Lucy was born and she was sweet and brave and loved drinking strawberry smoothies and she cried for her friends at least a million times before standing up and fighting for them.

However, seeing her form in the large mirror now, unwanted flashbacks popped into her head. Memories of her life as an heiress. Of the cage she used to call home. Of the way she has lived, thinking that there was nothing else for her and this was the only way. Of all the fear and pain and loneliness she had to endure. Her body looked ravishing in the simple white dress, the pink lines of her guild mark on her hand standing out against the smooth fabric. The very proof of her freedom, forever adorning her palm.

She was in charge.

She was free.

And yet...

Shaking her head, as if to banish the lingering voices, Lucy shrugged out of the gown. It fell smoothly down her body, pooling on the ground around her ankles. The lace glinted around her ankles before the ray of light shifted and they blended with the rest of the scrunched dress. She stepped over the fabric as if she was walking out of a dream. There was no cage. She wanted this. She chose this. Nobody forced her to agree or disagree - the choice was hers to make. So were the consequences, once she decided to go through with it.

Fairy Tail taught her how to live for herself. It was her home, her first real haven. She felt brave and powerful when her family surrounded her, the belief in her own strength coming to her easily. She loved it, all of it. But Fairy Tail disbanded, with Master gone and its members scattered around.

And Lucy realized that she was alone once more.