Disclaimer: I don't own South Park, wish I did, but I don't. It's owned by Matt and Trey.
A/N: Sorry for the wait, I ended up deciding to rewrite the story changing a few things. Mostly because I forgot a bit of the story along with losing the rest of the story. So I'm rewriting it so I can get back into it. Ps. Sorry for the wait had a lot going on that I couldn't get down to writing more...soo….yeah. Here it is!
Pairing: Stan and Craig (aka Staig/Cran)
Craig POV:
Math class...Stupid. Teacher..don't get me started. I rested my head on my hand just staring straight at the board trying to process what's been written. Groaning quietly I continue trying to make sense of it all. Why is it it makes more sense written down instead of the man standing up front trying to explain it all. Thinking he was getting through to everyone, but in reality he was making it worse. Deciding it'd be best not to focus too much on the guy I began to just try to scribble down some notes from this class, but even then I'd tune into what the guy was saying. Like Jesus how did this guy even manage to get a degree or even a job to teach to begin with? My lucky guess is he confused the damn principle or even the school board to the point they just hired him to shut up. Hell even Garrison with his nonsense stories and ways of teaching was more tolerable than this bloke. In the end deciding I couldn't get any benefit to learning in this class I put on my headphones to just doze off in thought. If you couldn't really tell I'm bored as fuck in this class. The "teacher" if you even want to consider him one, is honestly just annoying the hell out of me. Like seriously and I mean seriously, how the hell did he even get his degree when he obviously sucks. I'm seriously questioning this...did the school board decided to hire an amateur who printed out his "degree" when let's face it, he sucks. And I know I've used the word seriously and sucks more than twice at this point but goddamn, I just can't. I mean I would speak up and tell him that he can't teach for the life of him, but then again I rather not go to go to the principal's office for the thousandth time this week alone. I mean I get that they love my pretty face, but I can't just bare with all the nagging from the principle anymore. Not that I'd listen anyways but I for damn sure know I rather keep my pretty little mouth shut and deal with nonsense then spending hours in that uncomfortable chair being spat on and belittled. I could even blow a gasket and turn into Kyle's mom and run a rampage all over town. But I won't and that's all that matters really.
Glancing back up at the man I can't stop the one thought that can't stop passing through my mind, annoying. Like his whole being pisses me off. Don't get me wrong, I can block his voice easy…but his voice is screechy as fuck and his person…his person is just annoying. This sounds like I'm belittling the man and believe me, I am. But you just don't understand until you've been seated in a classroom with a teacher like this. Like I might as well shoot myself now. He's the kind of adult that tries too hard to be "hip" with all the "cool" kids, but really he's just making a fool out of himself. His outfit honestly screams out 'help! I still live with mother and she's the one dressing me up for my big boy job.' Yet again if you think I can't even judge his outfit chose believe me I still can considering I went through that metro sexual faze with all the guys in town and I can still call a bad outfit if I see it. Shaking my head I yet again do my best to ignore his loud screechy obnoxious voice by raising the volume on my ipod, letting my gaze wander onto the students in the class before I contemplate mass homicide. I'm not going to, as I said contemplating. Continuing my people watching, my sights get locked onto a ravonette boy with his signature red and blue poof ball hat, well with a few new modifications on it. That's right, the famous jock of my shit hole of a school, well-loved, the one and only Stan Marsh. Well last I checked he was a jock. Then again I haven't bothered to check cause I'm not a stalker.
Do I like him?
Ha ha.
Hell. Fucking. No.
Marsh can my dick. Literally. That's probably all he does is suck cock for a living. Then again pretty sure all jocks secretly love to take it up the ass, think about it. They smack each others asses and use the excuse "Good Game" every time. C'mon I can't be the only one who knows they're secretly wanting to tickle each others pickles on the inside. Also even though Marsh is the "beloved" jock of the school he's been looking like a total emo kid for the past year. Even though I don't have to take notice if everyone in the damn school is talking about it. Apparently he looks edgy or as the girls would say "hot" or even trying to start a trend. It's odd to be honest, but do I care? Nope. He's a douchebag.
The Douchebag.
See here's the thing. He and his friends scammed me of my birthday money in elementary, one-hundred bucks to be exact. The hundred bucks that my now deceased grandmother gave me. And you know what those jerks wanted to do with the money? Start a damn flute band. I mean honestly if it wasn't for the government stepping in and being controlled by a guinea pig disguised as a human I would've made a lot of money. Then again those assholes plans never go right and just backfire. But that's besides the point. The point is those jerks still haven't paid me back yet. And not only that but everytime they decide to make a scheme or even do anything it always goes south. Even when they don't get involved! And those guys have done nothing but cause me trouble and I have a right to be upset with them for it. They never even considered the consequences to their actions and for some reason would end the day with "You know, I've learned something today" even though they caused the whole shitstorm to begin with.
Assholes.
Anyways marsh (see what I did there. He doesn't even deserve to have a capital M. Why? Well that's simple. IT doesn't even fucking deserve it. Oh, look, I called It an It!) is the leader of his group. Consisting of three other dicks and It is the vagina skank of the group.
Wait no, that's offensive to vaginas and skanks.
Alright there's It, obviously. There's Kenny who actually isn't that much of a douche. That guy is actually pretty cool even though he's a horndog and can't keep it in his pants, nonetheless still an alright guy. I do switch with his name depending on my mood or just the mood in general though, Kenny or just McCormick. Then there's fat-ass, that's right Eric Cartman. Douche sucking pussy. I genuinely hate him… Sadly he comes in handy sometimes, even if he's a crazy psycho-horse shit. Last but not least, Kyle Broflovski. Kyle and It have been best friends for years, but from what I can tell they haven't been seen together that often as of late. Weird as it is a lot of people thought they were gay for one another, yet they haven't been together. Bet it's cause one of them confessed to the other and got rejected. Bet it was Marsh. Anyways Broflovski, well he's a mega asshole who thinks he knows everything and always fights Cartman on the dumbest things. And has a psycho mom to back him up and add more hellfire to the littlest things for her 'bubby.'
But whatever, just thinking of Marsh and his friends and all the trouble they caused just adds gasoline to the fire, or whatever that saying is. I mean I used to be a semi-good kid. Well minus all the detentions I got and the fact that I would cause some trouble myself. Specifically with flipping people off, but that's besides the point. The point is when they used to get in trouble they would always blame me and well to be frank that was an asshole move of them to do. So what would I do in those situations? I'd get pist because I wasn't going to take their bullshit blame game cause they were too much of a bunch of pussies and couldn't own up to their shit. So I'd stand up, flip them off and tell them to go fuck themselves and I wasn't their damn escape goat. Which in the end started a ton of fights with them and my group. Cause my bros got my back and they were done with dealing with their shit too. Their group was nothing but trouble, but we did settle it in the end. But no way in fuck was I going to forget about the money they owed me or all the dumb detentions that I got in cause of them. I'm so mad that by this point I'm sending daggers to the back of his head hoping it does something to the jerk…
Ha! I hope you feel uncomfortable as I burn lasers - seriously wish I could do that again, but on my own will this time - through the back of your head you emo bitch. No, I'm not offending emos, they're not bad, they're actually interesting kids. Seriously though, he is a total emo kid. Which still makes me wonder why he's even/was on the football team. I mean don't they tell you you have to look like "men" and not like a pussy? He even has the stereotypical emo bangs and outfits. Honestly I'm shocked no one has even beaten him up or rejected him for it yet. Not counting me of course. Also I kind of thought emo kids don't play sports…but that's probably me going with the stereotypes, after all this entire goddamn town is filled with stereotypes. Anyways I'm the only person who actually beats the guy up, not for being emo, rather being a dick. The only good thing about it is at least he's man enough to fight back, especially before, I'll give him that. Even though oddly enough he's been avoiding trying to start fights as of late...weirdo. Not that I mind getting into fights and letting out pent up anger, but he just didn't seem all there when we did. Unless I bad talked his personal life and called him a posing fag especially when Wendy would dump him for the thousandth time. Then he's go into a raging fit. Am I being petty? Yeah I am and can I easily let the grudge go? Well yeah but I don't know, even going through it all every time I thought about it no matter what it'd just tick me off even when I know I shouldn't be hung up on it. Is it contradicting? Well, duh. Maybe I just have a rage issue or something. I don't know.
Anyways back to the real matter at hand instead of my jumbled thoughts. I just continue to glare until I see a note being tossed onto his desk by…Clyde? What the hell?! Why did my bro just pass Marsh a note? You're all probably thinking someone gave him the note to pass right? Well no, I'm the only one behind Clyde and the row we sit in is the last row in the class, so no neighbors unless you count the other mindless zombies on the right. Plus why would Marsh look at Clyde like that…
The hell...I continue to watch with a semi-confused face. Well as much as I can show right now of course. Wait, what?! Why is my bro and Marsh blushing?! Seriously what the hell are those guys writing to each other about?!
Okay no… Gotta keep my cool… trying my best to maintain an impassive face but getting slightly annoyed at the situation I am currently watching happen before my eyes. I can't help but feel a boiling rage build up and I hear the harsh snap of my pencil breaking in my palm.
Shit! Why the hell am I even getting annoyed anyways? Why is this getting on my nerves? I mean they were both on the football team, or at least were? I don't know, either way it should be normal and expected that they speak to each other, right? I look back closely at them wishing I could read minds or even read the damn note right now. But the expressions they have on can't be average notes talk. Can it? Dammit. There's no way are they're sending each other ordinary notes with Marsh giving a cute embarrassed look at Clyde and then Clyde from the looks of it on the verge of fainting.
I force myself to look away and look down at my lap. Calm down Craig. Shit, why the hell am I clenching my fists so tight? I shake my head trying to clear out whatever is wrong with me. But the look that Marsh was giving is stuck in my head and for some reason I can't help but feel angry. Why is he giving that look to Clyde...Why not m- no. Fuck! What the hell is wrong with me right now! I lay my head down on the cool table and try to find a more logical reason to why I'm so angry…and sad? No no way am I sad. Hurt? Upset? Disappointed? No...dammit why would the thought of Clyde and Stan possibly being a thing make me feel this way? Ha no way it can't be, but then again am I in denial. Well maybe it could be Stan just saying something gay like how he might like Clyde's ass. After all he said something similar about Kyle in front of the whole class back in elementary.
Yeah, that has to be it. There's no other way it could be anything else, so that's gotta be it. That's why I'm reacting this way. I'm just looking out for my bro and don't want Marsh to be forcing himself onto him! A loud familiar ring echoes out and I sigh in relief, grateful that it was time for lunch.
Shit, how long have I been in deep thought about this? I shrug it off and gather up my belongings, shoving them all into my shoulder bag still feeling utterly annoyed for some strange reason. I stand up and walk out the door heading for my crappy bent up locker. Instinctively putting in my combo as Tweek Tweak strides up, or rather spazzing up to me. I hear buzzing all around me but pay no mind to it, pretty sure Tweek is trying to start small talk, but I can't seem to focus as I aggressively start to shove my things into my locker.
"C-Craig? Did I, ugh, say s-something wrong? Gah!" Tweek tries to say. Hearing my name catches my attention making me come out of my sour thoughts. Shrugging I end up slamming shut my locker door, muttering a "let's go" as I march off with a worried Tweek behind as we head straight to the cafeteria.
Gotta relax.