Hello dear readers! I would like to begin this author's note by saying that this is heavily inspired by the absolute masterpiece of fanfiction that is This Bites! Seriously, the people writing that thing are actual legends. They inspired me to take a stab at my own One Piece self-insert, but just as I began to plan it out, I came across another incredible fic called Marie D. Suesse and the Mystery New Pirate Age! After reading and enjoying such a great piece of writing, I didn't have the heart to write a self-insert because I realised that it would be mediocre at best with nothing original. But then, I had an idea on how I could set this fic apart from the many others of its type. And I'm quite confident in saying that what I want to do is not something that many, if any, other writers on this site have done before.
Also, I want to add that the way I write will involve short descriptions for characters and places, since I have trouble wording them well, and I figure that you already know what they look like anyway.
Life took many turns as one progressed through it. This was an undeniable fact, and it was simply part of the great adventure. What was not a part of the great adventure was life rotating three hundred and sixty degrees then shooting back at Mach 10 and dropping you in the ocean.
That analogy was quite confusing, but it was the best that our handsome and valiant protagonist could come up with as he took in the situation that he was in.
The situation being that he was fucking Buggy the Clown from One Piece.
No, not like that. He had become Buggy.
And he was currently standing in front of a crowd of pirates, staring at Monkey D. Luffy as he was trapped in a stock. The rubber man had a confused expression as he stared at the clown, "This is the first time I've seen an execution." He remarked in a casual voice, completely undisturbed by his situation.
Buggy, his mind still blank due to the shock of the situation he was in, felt the blankness being erased by a powerful sense of terror. He understood how Bartolomeo had been inspired, and how almost every enemy in the series had underestimated Luffy:
He was a man too stupid to know fear.
Throwing a nervous glance to the crowd before the stand, Buggy saw how they all stared at him with expectations in their eyes. He knew what those expectations were, and on the inside he was screaming and crying because he also knew what would happen if he tried to meet them.
His mind had finally begun to kick into high gear as he came to terms with the situation he was in, and a fighting spirit forced it to figure out how he could escape. He was kicking himself inside, trying to remember exactly what had happened here in the story.
Execution… Pirate King… Storm! Just as Luffy's head was about be chopped off, a freakish storm had blown in and a bolt of lightning had destroyed the stand.
A plan formed in his mind, and Buggy looked at Luffy with resolve, "You're the one being executed!" He informed him.
In response, Luffy's confusion turned to shock, "WHAT?!" He exclaimed, eyes widening.
"Do you have any last words, Straw Hat?" Buggy asked jeeringly.
Staring at the crowd before him, and as if possessed by the spirit of who he was about to reference, a defiant expression formed on Luffy's face, "I'M THE MAN," He roared, "WHO'LL BECOME THE PIRATE KING!"
As that absurd declaration echoed throughout the town, the onlookers stared at Luffy with a combination of admiration and outrage. Buggy, on the other hand, chose to toss his sword towards the pirates and unlock Luffy, heaving the top of the stock up.
"Then this is no time for you to die!" He roared triumphantly, pointing his finger towards the pirates. As he spoke the last syllable, a magnificent bolt of lightning struck the sword he had thrown, badly shocking the majority of the pirates. As they laid on the ground, twitching in pain, winds and rain began to make their presence known. Drenching and almost toppling everyone there.
Luffy's expression of defiance and determination turned back to confusion as he stood up and stared at Buggy, "Why'd you free me? Aren't we supposed to be enemies?"
Buggy hesitated, trying to figure out what he could say that would convince Luffy to join him. While the man was an idiot, he was an idiot with strong ideals. "I SAILED THE GRAND LINE WITH THE PIRATE KING HIMSELF!" He roared to both Luffy and the shocked (both figuratively and literally) crowd, "AND I WANT TO SAIL THE GRAND LINE WITH THE NEXT ONE AS WELL!" He looked at the pirates who, up until now, he had been the captain of, "ALVIDA, CABAJI, I TRUST YOU TWO TO LEAD THE BUGGY PIRATES!"
The aforementioned two stared up at Buggy, left speechless by the sudden, unexplainable shift in attitude.
Luffy blinked, rubbing the back of his head with a grin on his face, "Well if that's what you want, sure!"
On the inside, Buggy breathed a sigh of relief as the most stressful part of his plan was now complete. Now, he just had to keep himself alive and let the Straw Hats do the rest.
As if on cue, Roronoa Zoro and 'Black Leg' Sanji ran up to the execution stand, and a powerful kick from Sanji was all it took to send the entire thing crashing down to the ground.
Grinning his signature Monkey D. grin, Luffy pointed to Buggy, who was laying dazed among the wreckage of the stand, "Zoro, Sanji, meet our new crewmate!"
The responses of the two contrasted greatly. While Sanji was apathetic, simply shrugging and trying to light a cigarette in the downpour, Zoro scowled and clenched his swords tighter. Evidently, he hadn't forgotten the injuries dealt to him by Buggy's floating hand.
Sanji looked around, before remarking, "We better hurry, Nami-swan told us to be back at the Merry as soon as we could."
Luffy nodded and looked at Buggy, "Follow us! The Merry's our ship!" He instructed cheerfully, right before taking off towards the streets at high speed.
As Buggy blinked, Sanji turned to him and chuckled, "Welcome to the Straw Hats." He remarked right before taking off after his rubbery captain, closely followed by Zoro.
There are three things that cannot be stopped: Inherited will, the destiny of an age, and the dreams of its people.
The Pirate King, Gol D. Roger, had once declared that as long as people continue to pursue the meaning of freedom, those things will never cease to be.
And indeed, there was one man who fought in the pursuit of freedom harder than any other. Standing inhumanly tall, the left side of his face marked with red as he grinned confidently, Monkey D. Dragon stood alone in Loguetown as the wind and rain roared all around him. Paying it no mind, he stared dead ahead and muttered to himself, "A pirate? That's fine, too…"
His every step oozing strength, of both the body and the mind, he walked through the forces of Mother Nature, as though it were a calm, sunny day. Though his eyes remained focused ahead, he could feel all around the entire town. Around the entire island, even. This feeling, a result of a natural phenomenon every human possessed, alerted him to every person in the town's location. Mostly, there were just fleeing civilians, subdued pirates and marine soldiers running around. However, among the people, there were a select few of interest.
A former cabin boy for the King himself, the son of Red-Hair's sniper, an East Blue swordsman who had fought Hawk-Eyes and lived to tell the tale, a Vinsmoke, and of course, his own flesh-and-blood son.
There also seemed to be a marine captain engaged in conflict with his son. A Logia, of all things, though his use of the ability, the smoke-smoke fruit, was quite basic. Though his son may use his own fruit, the gum-gum fruit, with much more skill and creativity, it did not change the fact that he lacked haki, leaving him unable to damage the smoking captain. The situation was the same for the Vinsmoke, the swordsman and the former cabin boy, who all found themselves outmatched. Although the swordsman seemed preoccupied with another of his kind, a woman. Dragon could tell that she was a talented marine, and impressive by East Blue standards, but ultimately outmatched by the pirate.
On the other hand, the Marine Captain had already subdued Luffy, pinning him to the ground. Dragon sighed, he couldn't allow the journey to end so early. He prepared to use one of the six powers, the one known as shave, to go aid Luffy in his fight, when something caught his eye; the cabin boy, who had previously been standing away from the action, intended to act. It was his intent to act that brought a very interesting piece of information to Dragon's mind: His hands weren't attached to his body. Rather, the cabin boy must have eaten some sort of devil fruit, likely the chop-chop one. These hands that despite having been severed, continued to act, had moved in opposite directions. One of them was placed near the Marine Captain, while the other was near a group of Marine soldiers.
The most wanted man in the world developed an expression of intrigue, and used shave to appear on a nearby roof so that he could observe the conflict from a distance. He really wanted to see what a member of the King's crew would do to mere East Blue soldiers.
As if cued by Dragon's appearance, Buggy's hands sprang into action. The one near the marines flew at one soldier's face as a fist, temporarily stunning him and allowing it to steal his rifle. At the same time, his other hand, the left one, flew towards Smoker from behind and snatched his seastone Jutte off his back, quickly poking him with it so as to force him into a physical form. Along with becoming vulnerable to attack, his strength disappeared, along the rubber man held beneath him to knock him off and flee. As the surprised and weakened captain was falling to the ground, the cabin boy's right hand, still holding the rifle, shot him in the side. Of course, he was no sniper, so it just grazed him, but in his already weakened state, it may as well have hit him between the legs.
Dragon couldn't but grin. Seeing not just an arrogant logia, but a Marine Captain, get such a painful reality check was always fun. To add insult to the injury, a mighty gust of wind, like the wrath of god itself, blew in and sent the marines flying. A smile formed on the Revolutionary Leader's face as his son and his crewmates escaped to their ship and hastily set sail.
Buggy cried out as a slender but powerful fist slammed into his skull.
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, RECRUITING THIS CLOWN?!" The orange-haired navigator for the Straw Hats, Nami, roared over the storm, glaring murderously at Luffy.
In response, the captain simply stuck a finger up his nose and stared at her blankly, "His power is kinda cool, and he asked to join. If he was friends with Shanks, I'm sure he's fine." He said casually, looking down at said clown.
Taking this as his cue to toss in his two cents, Buggy quickly adopted a kneeling position with his head rested against the deck of the ship, "Please forgive me," He begged "I'm so, so very sorry for what I have done in the past. I just wish to help your captain achieve his goal. I-I have a lot of experience with the Grand Line, and with the New World! I could help you reach your goal much more easily!"
In response, the long-nosed sniper Usopp, who had previously stayed quiet, pointed his thumb to his puffed-out chest proudly, "We don't need your help!" He declared firmly "I sailed the entire Grand Line when I was just a boy!"
Buggy knew it was a lie. The sniper's most well-known character trait was lying, after all. "Oh! So does that mean you managed to get a log pose during your adventures?" He inquired, looking up and doing his best to feign curiosity. His acting must have been good enough, since all five of the other Straw Hats blinked and looked confused, though it was hard to tell with Luffy and Zoro, since there was barely a change in expression. As they hadn't spoken up, Buggy decided to keep talking, "You know? The special compass that you need to navigate the Grand Line without dying?"
Immediately upon saying that, Nami blanched, "What would happen if we didn't have a log pose?"
Buggy fought to keep his surprised expression from turning to a grin as he replied, "Well, because of how the islands all emit their own magnetic fields, or something, I don't remember the exact details, a regular compass is unable to point north accurately. A log pose works by locking onto one island's magnetic field, and then once it's been on that island for a certain amount of time, it updates and points to the next island. Eventually by following the trail, you'll reach Raftel, where the One Piece is hidden."
Letting out a sigh, Nami crossed her arms, "Fine. I'll admit that I was unprepared for the Grand Line. And maybe if you keep helping out, I'll accept you as a member of the crew." She relented with an annoyed tone.
Now that the timing was appropriate, Buggy allowed a wide grin to form on his face, "Thank you! I promise that as long as you have me on the crew, sailing the Grand Line will be a breeze!" He declared, standing up and crossing his arms defiantly, "I even know where you can get a log pose, possibly for free!"
Upon hearing the last word of his sentence, Nami's eyes gleamed greedily. Usopp looked around at the stormy situation around them and quivered slightly, "D-Don't you guys think that entering the Grand Line in the midst of this storm is a bit-" His worries were cut off by Sanji merrily placing a barrel down on the deck.
"So, we've reached the Grand Line, have we? Well this calls for celebration!" He declared cheerfully as he placed one foot on the barrel, "To find All Blue." He stated. Whether it was a reminder to himself before launching into the hardest part of the journey, a declaration to the world of his dreams, or simply a reminder for his crew was unknown, though the rest of the crew seemed to take this as a sign to do the same thing.
"To become the Pirate King!"
"To be the greatest swordsman…"
"To draw a map of the world!"
"T… T-To become a brave warrior of the seas!"
With each member having declared their dreams with such conviction and ferocity, Buggy couldn't help but be awed seeing the moment make its way from paper and ink to real life, or as real as you could get in another world. He was confused though, as the 'Off to the Grand Line we go!' part was not uttered. He was more confused to see the five pirates look at him expectedly.
"Well? Aren't you gonna join in?" Luffy asked, looking at him confusedly.
His eyes widened slightly, and Buggy quickly walked over and placed his foot on the barrel with theirs, between Zoro and Usopp's. His eyes widened on the inside too, as he realised he had no idea what exactly his 'dream' was supposed to be. He didn't want to say something that would anger Luffy and get him kicked off, or something that would make Zoro and Sanji kick his ass. Shit… what could his dream be?
"TO DEFEAT THE THREE ADMIRALS!" He screamed, both on the inside and the outside. Why the hell had he said that?! He was Buggy the frigging Clown, for goodness' sake! He couldn't beat a Vice Admiral, let alone one of the three men who acted as a counter to the emperors themselves, let alone all three of them.
With each member of the crew having said his or her piece, they yelled out joyfully together, "Off to the Grand Line we go!", not realising the hell that awaited them.
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