Basically, I remembered that I wrote this and got bored so I decided to rewrite it. It's been six years since I posted my first ever chapter of this, almost seven? Big yikes but honestly, I need more hobbies. So, here it is.
Annabeth found herself lost, mindlessly living as if she were nothing more than a figment of another's imagination, a blank face forgotten by the end of the day, a simple background character as life passed around her. Her heart was broken, destroyed in a million pieces and left shattered on the ground and only one person had the glue. Had.
Percy sacrificed himself to close the doors of death and now he was nothing but a memory in Annabeth's frail mind. She screamed out at him, begging him to not do it. She needed him for her life had never felt as complete as it did when Percy was in her company. She found the greatest love of all, the kind that sappy people wrote songs about, the kind she never believed in until he came into her life.
Ever since, she was never the same. Her last scream was at Percy, as though she would never be able to speak again. Every time she desperately tried to yell, she choked on the sobs in the back of her throat, the feeling of suffocation coming over her in a wave, accompanied by the moment she lost her world on repeat in her mind, like some kind of eternal torture.
A few weeks had passed since then, slower than ever in Annabeth's mind. The days seemed to drag on, the clocks ticking slower with each second, and yet the nights passed as if they were forever in rewind. Annabeth could have sworn the hours reversed, suddenly back to one in the morning when she believed it was closer to five. And each night was the same, full of the agony that came with living amongst the absence of light in her life. She stared out the window, perched on the end of her bed, watching the clouds drift toward her, bringing the darkness with them. The stars were alive in all the night skies, twinkling high above her, and while she followed them with her eyes, darting across the dark horizon, she fell deeper into believing she'd never be happy again. She would watch the sun as it rose, creating a fusion of pink and orange and purple, twirling in delight that resembled a painting she'd find in the most prestigious museum in the entire world, perhaps even the universe, but all of that seemed insignificant to her. Her world was nothing without Percy in it and the thought of living without him frightened her, for he was all the comfort she ever knew.
Annabeth managed to find comfort in a few friends, opening up to them after their consistent persuasion. Leo was one in particular. He was so sweet to her, always wondering how she was and what he could do to make her days just a little better. Annabeth appreciated it, and slowly, a slight smile returned on her lips when they would speak, accompanied by the smallest of laughs. It was progress. Eventually, she came to realise that she couldn't change the past, no matter how many nights she didn't sleep, no matter how many days passed that lacked happiness. Although her world was now encompassed in darkness, she began to come to terms with the fact it was all going to be different now and there was nothing she could do besides accept it.
Over the next few months, Leo moved in with her, the pair growing closer in bond. Annabeth liked the comfort and the constant reassurance he gave her that everything would be okay. She would have liked to say she believed in it fully, that things would be okay, but doubts clouded her mind. So she never agreed, nor disagreed, and instead remained silent toward the statement. Leo managed to make her crack a joke, for what felt like the first time in forever. And with every inch of humour that returned to her, the days passed just a little faster and the nights were easier to live through.
Annabeth would sometimes catch herself deep within her memories of Percy, thinking about the fun they had, the love they shared, the happiness she couldn't help but feel with him. Her heart tugged and pulled while she was desperate to shut her mind of. Annabeth's body seemed to ache, craving some kind of connection, missing the closeness of a body sleeping next to her. She needed someone for she couldn't spend forever in love with somebody who would never love her back.
She told Leo how she felt, opening up to him through teary eyes and a soft voice. His eyes lit up in the dark room, while hers remained focus on her lap, her hands hastily intertwining.
"I know I can't hate him for being a hero — that's one of the reasons why I fell in love with him — but I hate that he left me alone in this world. And yet, I can't hate him. I think I'll love him forever," Annabeth breathed out, her shaky voice the only sound in the room.
Leo turned to the right, placing his arms around Annabeth's back, encasing her into a warm hug as if to say that he understood her perfectly, which he did.
"Love is a tricky thing but I know Percy would want you to be happy. I bet he'd be happy as long as you were," Leo offered her a small smile, his eyes exuding concern combined with a glimmer of admiration.
"Thank you. I want somebody else but I'm just afraid. Would that make me a horrible person? Would he hate me? I just can't bear to be alone anymore," Annabeth's chest expanded, only to be filled with the emptiness once again. She had a void and needless to say, she was desperate for it to be filled again. The emptiness now, with the way it suffocated her and made it harder and harder for her to breathe each day without choking and breaking down into tears, was worse than the pain ever was. She swore she'd do anything to feel sad again because at least it was an emotion, an actual permanence of feeling.
"I don't think it would. You have to be happy and you can't dwell on the past. He'd want that for you, I know he would."
Annabeth stared at Leo, raising her gaze from her hands to his eyes for the first time during their conversation. She felt her heart race as she bored into them. She could feel the light in them extracting into hers and the weight in her chest proceeded to ease. Even breathing seemed easier. She felt safe, comforted, like she was intertwined with his soul, almost.
The pair remained the mutual gaze for a few moments, the outside world a mere memory, without a single thought through either's mind: just an embracement of the comfort they suddenly felt in each other.
Leo slowly leaned in, his palm flat on the bed next to Annabeth's thigh. Annabeth slowly pulled towards Leo, too. It took a few seconds but their lips met. And instantly, her heart was almost bursting with delight, her blood rushing under her skin and a smile returning to her face as they continued to kiss. It was sweet and short and exactly what she needed, she thought.
"I," Leo broke away from the kiss, "I like you, Annabeth. But I don't want you to rush into this, if you're not ready."
Annabeth was silent for a moment, her sight focusing back on her lap as she pondered it. Leo. Leo. Leo. Do I want Leo? On one hand, she considered, he was right. She did need to move on and redeem the happiness she knew she needed. He was kind and caring and made her feel incredibly supported. But on the other hand, was it wrong? Was she moving on too fast? Would it be betrayal towards Percy? Her head twirled, irrefutably making herself almost spin down the spirals she had become well acquainted with amongst recent times.
She swallowed hard, considering each possibility, each outcome of her response. It was borderline agony for her; the way in which her mind would swirl, her emotions bouncing around within to echo every thought and the way she couldn't decide which was best: to live in the moment and take a leap for your own benefit, or to allow the past to cement itself in all you do and all that you'll become?
A single light shone through her window, possibly a lonesome car's headlights passing by in the night, and the beam landed on Leo, illuminating his face, the soft gaze of his eyes on hers, before it retreated back into the evening, bound on its journey. It was all clear for Annabeth. There was never any point in letting the past keep you captive, latching onto you and begging for control. It would only ever induce the suffering she desperately needed to avoid. And for once in her life, she chose herself. She chose to be happy.
"I like you, too, Leo."