Ben made an virtual appointment with a family therapist and they sat in the living room quietly waiting for the session to start. Miranda, Ben and William were sitting on the couch while the boys were sitting behind the couch on bar stools.
"Hello everyone! I am Dr.Maxine Foster and I will be your family therapist for the next four sessions.
"So I can easily assume that the couple holding hands is Dr. Warren and Dr. Bailey," Dr. Foster said.
"Oh yes and this is Miranda's father William Bailey and these are our sons Tuck and Joey," Ben explained.
"Nice to meet you all so why are we here today?" Dr. Foster asked.
Ben was about to speak but Miranda touched his thigh and spoke.
"We are here because this pandemic has taken a toll on our family. I have spent over 3 months away from home working and living in the hospital taking care of Covid patients. My husband has to come in close contact to rescue people.
"And….and my mom just recently died from Covid 19 after I moved her and my dad from Baltimore,Maryland so that they could be closer to me. The facility allowed someone with Covid 19 to move in causing an outbreak," Miranda explained teary eyed.
Ben held her hand, "We just want to talk through it and be given some tools on how to deal with the losses and readjust to life efficiently," Ben shared.
Dr.Foster started with Tuck and Joey asking them how they felt about the pandemic. They expressed how they never thought they'd miss school and the routine of it so much. They were glad that their mom finally decided to come home.
"Okay doctors, tell me how you have felt about everything that has been going on and how it has affected your marriage?" Dr. Foster asked.
"Well this last week and a half is the first time me and Miranda have stayed together since the pandemic started. It has been hard being without her because she is the love of my life and best friend but we made it work," Ben shared.
"And our marriage is good I'm just happy that we get to be back under the same roof again," Ben expressed as he kissed her cheek and she smiled at him.
"It has been hard not being able to be a surgeon. Once the pandemic started all of the hospitals resources went into treating Covid patients. And I felt useless watching people die despite my doctors and I best efforts," Miranda explained.
"Then on top of losing patients, trying to keep my anxiety and OCD under control, having to be strong and run the hospital…. then one of my doctors who I taught was murdered along with me watching my mother die from Covid 19," Miranda shared getting choked up.
"Okay Dr. Bailey, I will give you sometime to feel your emotions," Dr.Foster said.
"Okay Mr.Bailey, how are you feeling about everything?" Dr.Foster asked.
William sat there quiet for a moment, "Ummm I recently loss wife Elaine after 45 years of marriage. She was my everything and now I don't feel like I know what to do," he shared.
William then looked over at his daughter with tears in his eyes. "And I know that our baby girl was just trying to be a good daughter and take care of us by making us move closer to her especially since my wife suffered with Alzheimers."
"But my once fairly healthy wife got infected with this virus and is now dead and a part of me can't help but think that if we had stayed at home in Baltimore she would still be here and I wouldn't be so alone," William said breaking down and getting up to leave.
Ben saw Miranda's body language change and she grabbed her fingers and squeezed them hard and Ben wrapped his arms around her and put his hands over hers. Miranda tried to hold it in but she couldn't and she let out a scream as she cried and fell into Ben's chest.
They ended their first therapy session and Ben gave the boys money to order food. Ben walked to their bedroom were Miranda was laying down staring into space. Ben got behind her and held her for awhile.
"Baby it's not your fault and he knows that. You can't help the events that happened after you made a decision that would've been best for your parents had this pandemic never happened," Ben spoke in her ear.
Miranda turned over and cried some more and Ben massaged her back until she fell asleep.
Later that night around 12am Ben woke up to find that Miranda wasn't in the bed. He got up and walked slowly to the living to find it dark and empty and so was the kitchen.
She wasn't gone because their keys were still on the foyer table and her purse also in the same place. He peeped in her dad's room and both the boys room and she wasn't there.
He went out the back door and stepped onto their patio and looked up into the tree house he built her. It was dark but it only made since that she would be there.
Ben slowly walked up the stairs praying that he would find her in there and when he open the door he breathed out a sigh of relief when he saw her laying in the large beanbag chair.
She was just staring at the ceiling and pulling on her fingers and he just sat down in front of her and took a moment to gather his emotions.
He knew that it had been a tough day for her and her dad after the therapy session so he didn't want to be upset with her.
"Miranda….baby look at me," Ben said soft but firm as he touched her feet.
It was a moment before she sat up and looked at him pulling her fingers roughly. Then she stopped when Ben started doing the routine they'd started for when her anxiety and OCD would flair up.
She started to do the exercise and they did it for a few minutes until Miranda took a deep breath and stopped.
"You feel better Miranda," Ben said softly.
"Yeah….a little," Miranda answered.
"Good because for a moment you scared me. Why would you walk out the house and not tell me where you were going?" Ben scolded.
"Well that was the point, and you were asleep so I didn't know you would wake up and realize I wasn't there," Miranda said with her head down.
Ben scooted closer and looked up into her face, "You are my world Miranda Bailey and the thought of something happening to you terrifies me. So waking up to you not in bed when I know that's where you were supposed to be was scary," Ben expressed.
Miranda made her pouting face realizing how upset she made Ben and she touched his face, "I'm sorry," she said in a slight whisper.
William got up from the bed and sat at the desk and laptop that Ben had setup for him to complete his individual therapy session.
He was nervous but open because he knew that Elaine wouldn't want to him to go on suffering.
William pressed the buttons Ben showed him and Dr. Foster came on the screen.
"Good morning Mr. Bailey," she said enthusiastically.
"Good morning," he answered politely.
So earlier this week we had a session with your family and it kind of blew up. Can you tell me about what you said and how are your emotions now?
"I know it's not my daughter's fault and I don't really blame her because she could've never predicted that this pandemic would happened," William said.
"But that's just how I was feeling in the moment because for months we went back and forth about moving here and the only reason I finally agreed is because my wife's Alzheimer's was getting to be a bit much.
"And I thought it would be nice to be near our baby girl but it I had just roughed it out and stayed home maybe my wife would still be here. But I know it's not Miranda's fault," William explained.
"She probably needs to hear that from you because I think her own guilt was eating at her already," Dr. Foster told him.
They agreed that he would have a conversation with Miranda and they continued the session.
Miranda and Ben sat on the couch watching the sci fi channel when William came in and sat down also.
"What's up dad, how are you feeling?" Ben asked.
"Hey son, I'm feeling okay. I just finished my session with Dr. Foster," William answered.
Miranda just sat there looking at the tv not saying a word. William just stared at her as she ignored him and Ben looked back and forth between them.
"So you're not going to speak to you dad Miranda," Ben questioned.
Miranda didn't answer him and just turned her head away. She felt herself getting emotional thinking about what he'd said a couple of days ago.
"Miranda Elaine Bailey! Answer when you're husband is talking to you," William demanded.
Miranda got up and stormed off to the bedroom. Ben got up to go after her but William stopped him and went after her himself.
When he got to the door Miranda was laying on the bed wiping tears from her eyes and when she saw William she turned away from him.
William snickered a bit because in this moment his 43 year old daughter had reverted back into her 14 year old self and looked just like her mother doing it.
"Miranda Bailey," William said firmly.
"Dad," Miranda shot back with a slight attitude.
"Get up and let's go for a walk, I will meet you outside," William said.
Miranda got up and put on a lavender sweat suit and sneakers then met her dad outside on the porch. They put their masks on and started walking down the street. They were quiet for a minute and Miranda still felt upset and awkward.
"Miranda….you know that no matter what I say or how I can be sometimes I love you right?" William questioned.
Miranda just nodded her head slightly. William grabbed his daughter's hand and she started crying again.
"Daddy knows that it wasn't your fault okay. I was just frustrated and sad and wishing this would've never happened. You could've never predicted that this would happen when you were just trying to be a good daughter," William said stopping their walk.
"You are a good daughter….you are a good daughter Miranda Bailey. And I know that because you're mine and I raised you to be good at everything you do and you are," William said and Miranda smiled as he wiped her tears.
They walked back to the house and sat on the porch.
"Now order me some more of those desserts you got last week," William demanded and Miranda busted out laughing.