17/01/20: So I have started editing my work, adding a few things that will flesh out the story a bit more. I realise I started this story many years ago, and my writing has changed a bit since then. I also wanted to flesh out a few things, like Draco carrying his trunks while injured etc.
A/N: Well, this is my very first story I'm sharing. Ever. I know it will more than likely be as clichéd as hell but I hope you enjoy it any way. I do enjoy a good cliché every now and then.
Please read and review. I have no Beta so any and all mistakes are my own which I apologise for in advance. All reviews are welcome and any constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated!
Draco's P.O.V
Draco felt like he was drowning in all the thoughts and feelings coursing through his body, filling up his heart and clouding over his brain. These feelings were going to be the death of him, and in some cases quite literally. His father's actions were getting more erratic, his punishments more intense, and Draco wasn't sure if he would be able to survive much longer. The stress of having to deal with Narcissa divorcing him was destroying his father's already cracked psyche, along with the defeat of Voldemort last year in the Department of Mysteries. Draco had bruises littered all over his body, he could count most of his bones by touch, and he was too weak to even do any homework – never mind actually getting access to his work for most of his holidays. He just hoped that he wouldn't get into too much trouble. Knowing his luck he would be in detention for the first few weeks of term. Draco thanked Merlin that today he was going back to Hogwarts; he simply hoped he didn't collapse before finding a compartment.
Over the holidays, Draco had decided to make some changes in his life. He was tired of being controlled by fear – of his father, of Voldemort, of his friends and society. So, he cut them off. Crabbe, Goyle and Pansy had been more sycophants than friends, following his every order to gain his favour or being paid by his father to spy on him. While he was a Slytherin, he didn't always enjoy all the backstabbing and horrible facades that everyone put up. He knew he was responsible for some of his fellow housemates actions; everyone was afraid of the Malfoys and wanted to ensure they were seen in the best light by the Malfoy heir so they acted in ways that they expected him to enjoy. But there was a reason Slytherin had a reputation for a reason – many of them really did enjoy the nastiness, but overall, they tried to protect each other from other houses. He had negatively impacted some of that, and he knew that with his parents divorce he would be in danger from his housemates as now there was some weakness, some flaw for them to exploit. It was another change he was determined to make. He wanted to apologise to some of the people he had mistreated and bullied, the most prominent person being Blaise Zabini. When he had come out as gay in third year, Draco was merciless with his teasing. He knew that homosexuality wasn't looked down upon in general wizarding society as potions and spells make it possible for same sex couples to have children together, however the Malfoys had always been very strict on homosexuality and viewed it as something wrong. immoral and disgusting. And because Draco realised in the same year that he was also gay – a realisation that was hard fought after a series of dreams involving one of his male professors using him for their pleasure – he needed to make sure no one would think he was also gay, or for his father to realise that he was okay with a gay friend. He lost Zabini's friendship that year, something he has regretted ever since, but he needed to protect himself.
Slowly, aware of some of his more severe injuries, Draco made his way across the platform to the train with all these thoughts running through his head. It was a small mercy that Lucius had had a driver drop Draco off as he got him to help put all of Draco's trunks and luggage in a compartment once he found an empty one. While he had been searching for his compartment, Draco had vaguely noticed Pothead and his merry band of redheads at one end of the platform. Sirius Black was also there, having been granted guardianship of Potter after his innocence had been proven when Peter Pettigrew had been captured and questioned. Last he heard Potter and Black taken to completely renovating 12 Grimmauld Place, something his mother had ranted about shortly before she left.
Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Draco tipped the driver and got some of his homework out. He had managed to finish his Ancient Runes and Defense Against the Dark Arts homework at the end of last year and during the holidays when he was allowed access to his work, so he decided to get started on Potions and Astronomy – he knew Uncle Severus would give him an extension, but he also knew it would attract untoward attention from his housemates if that happened. He had just settled down with his homework spread put on a table he had transfigured from one of his quill's when the compartment door was violently opened.
Draco froze in shock, his widened eyes the only indication of his shock and fear. The Terrible Trio stood at the door, shock momentarily freezing them. Slowly Potter's eyebrows disappeared into his flyaway hair, Weasley's blues eyes narrowed in suspicion and hatred while the mudb- no Granger, be nice- simply gave him a calculating look. "What in Merlin's name are you doing in our compartment?!" demanded Weasel. Draco tilted his head in confusion. "Your compartment? I don't see any name on it, there is no way to reserve compartments – I should know, I checked in first year," Draco responded. Weasel's face slowly got redder as Draco spoke, his famously short temper seemingly close to running out faster than usual. "However, I am willing to share as long as you do not bother me. Due to some unforeseen circumstances I have some homework to complete and would like to do so as soon as possible," Draco drawled as arrogantly as possible. He did love watching Weasel lose his temper, that is one thing that would never change, though perhaps now was not the best time to tease him. Granger and Pothead exchanged a look, they honestly couldn't throw him out as he was here first, but if it came down to an altercation there is no way that he would be able to win. Hell, he might not even survive the encounter. Granger gave him another one of those searching looks, he hated how observant she was and how she saw more than he wanted to give away.
She put a hand on Weasel's arm. "We can do that, as long as you offer us the same courtesy. It is too late to look for another compartment," she said carefully. Draco nodded. "I accept, I have a lot of work to get done and will not have time to bother you," he said slowly. As they put their trunks away, Weasel and Pothead were grumbling the whole time and shooting suspicious glances this way. Draco simply shrugged, pulled out his i-pod1 and put his headphones in. Soon music was blasting in his ears, drowning out the babble of the Terrible Trio while he tried to ignore the way his stomach was demanding food. Due to his intense focus on his homework he missed the calculating glance of Granger, the complete bafflement on Weasel's face (this was due to the I-pod) and Harry's slightly jealous look. Little did he know that the same thought was running through each teen's head- what the hell had happened to Draco Malfoy?
1-It doesn't make sense now, but the next chapter will be in Hermione's POV (I think, I'm not a great forward thinker) and her brains will explain everything. Also, shows how dated this is but I think a cellphone would be a step to far for Draco. He wouldn't have much of a need for it as he doesn't have any muggle friends or contacts, and I feel an i-pod is easier to hide than a cellphone.