a/n: Thanks so much to guest, guest, pgoodrichboggs, starlite22, badwolfjoggy, guest, kylorengirl,sereniterose, aamarillis, and brengail for reviewing, glad you liked it and thanks to everyone who follow/faved, really glad you liked toast so far. I'm trying to update this fast because of the pandemic hysteria .

~o~

CHAPTER 6
~O~

Hermione held her breath. Today had gone from worse to good then to bad again...then to unexpectedly nice.

She had never in a million years expected to be watching old muggle movies with Sirius. But, as she turned to see the handsome older wizard beside her, there was no one else she'd rather see them with. Sirius's laughter was infectious and the novelty of muggle movies to him made her feel like she was rediscovering this for the first time too. She'd learned from her gran to appreciate old movies from the 1930s, 40s and onto the 60s. There was something special about the films from those time periods...something almost legendary too about the actors. A certain finesse and old world glamour...that was hard to find anywhere else, except, perhaps in the wizarding world.

Hermione snuck a glance sideways at Sirius. With his long black hair and aristocratic features, Sirius could easily pass as a movie star too from a bygone era. A bit like a Gary Cooper mixed with Rhett Butler. Sirius's deep voice certainly could've uttered the words of many movie lines to make hearts flutter and women swoon.

But she tried to concentrate on the film. She didn't want to creep out Sirius by sneaking glances at him. Though it was very hard not to...when Sirius sat right next to her. Bloody hell. His tall, warm body so close and so faraway as he sat with his legs open, his lap looking impossibly inviting. Hermione shook off the thought. She shouldn't be having these thoughts. Especially so soon after a breakup. And, especially, not to mention that Sirius only cared about her as a friend, or perhaps, as a daughter-like figure. He clearly had no interest in her, despite what Ginny thought. Sirius liked to flirt occasionally but that's because it was in his nature to do so. It didn't mean she was anything special to him. He clearly thougt of her in a fatherly way.

Hermione crossed her arms and concentrated on watching the tense and hysterical ending of the film.

"That, minus the forehead, does remind me of my cousin Nathan LeStrange," Sirius said when Boris Karloff's creepy character crept on screen trying to kill his female relatives.

"Does he really?"

"Not the face. No one in my family is quite that hideously ugly. But murderous criminal mastermind with a thousand disguises? Yes. He'd take polyjuice instead of surgery though."

Hermione shuddered. She'd always felt bad Sirius grew up with such a crazy, dark family. "I'm sorry Sirius. We can change the film if you like?"

"No it's brilliant! Just wish I were adopted too," Sirius grinned as Teddy Roosevelt's character stormed the hallway again in full cavalry uniform yelling 'CHARGE!' before they got him to sign an agreement to go to a mental institution.

They both laughed many times at the black-and-white film.

Hermione smiled sadly as they watched the ending with Cary Grant's character happily storming off from his family's crazy mansion and going to marry his cute fiance.

"If only life had such happy endings," she sighed then flushed, realizing she probably sounded bitter.

Sirius's previously sparkling eyes dimmed in their brightness. And she felt bad that she had ended their movie fun with a sour note.

"You'll be fine," he said. "Trust me, you're no scrubber."

Hermione shrugged her shoulders. If only she could believe that right now. Though at this moment, she knew she was going through the eye of the storm. Her emotions ranged all over the place, fluttering one moment to the next from anger to apathy to intense loneliness...and even sometimes, joy like she'd freed herself from a heavy, unfulfilling relationship being with Ron. Now that she thought of it, Ron sort of had been dead weight in the last few years, bringing her down.

In a few more days, or weeks, she'd hopefully feel a lot better...and also stop trying to distract herself from her pain by jumping into Sirius's arms or something else crazy. She'd been so tempted to reach out a hand to him during the film...but it was clearly the loneliness in her soul talking.

Sirius clearly thought of her only as a friend. She had to remind herself of that constantly so she didn't make things awkward.

Maybe Ginny was right, she needed to start dating soon...before the loneliness drove her crazy and made her do something reckless. Maybe a good shag was the only sure remedy to get over an ex, after all. Ginny certainly seemed to think so. Though Sirius had no intentions of providing it, clearly, despite being pretty gorgeous and available in close proximity for the task. He might as well have been on the other side of the world.

"Goodnight," she said awkwardly as Sirius turned the lights on in the hallway.

"Do you want a night cap?"

"No...I'm fine." She pursed her lips together, trying not to show her disappointment that he still hadn't asked her out.

He nodded glumly and she turned to leave up the stairs to the second floor. As she placed a foot on the creaking old wood steps, however, Sirius called her name.

"Hermione," he said with heavy tone to his voice.

She turned around, her heart beating way too excitedly and hopefully in her chest. Calm down, she told herself, nothing is happening...yet she couldn't help feel slightly hopeful he was going to ask her something important.

"Yes?"

Sirius buried his hands in his pockets as he stood in the doorway looking at her. His grey eyes were piercing. "I know you feel like you won't be the same for awhile...but I'm tellinG you now, you'll be right as rain and better than ever soon. Ron was only holding you back, not just in my opinion. You can do a lot better."

She nodded numbly and tried not to show her disappointment that consolations were all Sirius had to say. Sure, he meant them, but getting dating advice from Sirius Black didn't exactly lift her soul from the depths of its despair.

"Of course. I'm sorry I cried earlier," she said while staring pointedly at her feet. He must have thought she was pathetic.

"Don't be," Sirius said. "Though you do look devastatingly bad when you cry."

"I beg your pardon—" Hermione looked back up at him.

"Only teasing." He gave her a dashing smile as she met his eyes.

Another kick of butterflies, or perhaps a kicked hornet's nest, fluttered in her stomach. How she wished, if only for a few seconds, Sirius would use his charm to distract her from her own pain for awhile. Yet he refused to, didn't he? And she was hardly entitled to Sirius's well...wand. She gulped. Merlin, it was maddening to be around him right now, so close and so far away. He had no idea, did he? She had better go to her room now before she said anything stupid.

"Sure. I better go."

"Goodnight, pet." Sirius winked then walked off down in the opposite direction to his room.

~O~

As Sirius watched Hermione climb up the stairs, his eyes involuntarily went straight to her arse and he was hypnotized by the sight of her hips moving...before he mentally slapped himself and told himself to keep walking. Then he made his way to his bedroom, struggling against the part of himself, that wanted to swoop up the stairs and grab the sad young woman by the shoulders and kiss her madly and smile again in his arms, if only for one night. Sirius knew he had the ability to make women happy for a night, usually one night, before he bungled things up or usually just excused himself and then that's where things usually ended.

But he couldn't do that with Hermione could he?

Sirius groaned as he sat down on his unmade bed and wrapped his hands around his messy, long hair. His pants felt desperately tight as he thought of how delicious, fresh and bloody tight she might feel if he ever got the chance. Merlin, bloody hell, this wasn't a good idea, after all, was it, having a cute young witch under his roof, alone and unattached? Especially when her big brown eyes had that aching soft look he just wanted to kiss away.

Hermione had no idea, did she? Of how maddening it was for him to have her so close to him and yet so far away, within his own house...yet completely out of reach.

The brunette was clearly still heartbroken over Ron, that stupid git. She wasn't ready for anyone to take his place yet was she?

Sirius smirked, though he would certainly fill that place both better, longer and fuller than the other wanker ever could.

How he longed to stretch her with something substantial.

Get your mind out of the gutter, he scolded himself not for the first time that night.

Yet he had to wait, if such an event ever came into his hand of cards.

Hmmm or perhaps never make a move, if he did now, she'd hate him and think he was a player swooping for an easy prey, or rather easy lay: the heartbroken newly single. No he couldn't.

He really shouldn't.

He lay back on his bed and tried to distract himself with other things before he said 'fuck it' and went to jerk off. But nothing helped and he quickly gave up before he grabbed an piece of parchment to ask one of his flings if he could meet her immediately. He couldn't risk staying around this house unlaid and he felt relief as he left Grimmauld Place.

~o~
As she walked down the hallway of the second floor, paintings of Sirius's ancestors scowled at the sudden burst of light from her wand, as she made her way down to the spare guest room that had become her quarters since the other day.

After brushing her teeth and changing into her oversized pajamas, she quickly pulled back the covers of the large bed and laid down. The bed felt enormous for only one person to be sleeping on. Though most of the rooms in Grimmauld Place were ostentatious and spacious...not to mention nice, especially since Molly Weasley and herself had gotten rid of the last of the dust from the house.

Thinking back, she had spent many summers over the years with Harry, Ron, Ginny and the Weasleys at this house. She'd been a teenager back then and never been close to Sirius. Mostly she'd argued with him about his mistreatment of Kreacher and house-elves. And sometimes she had criticized his unhinged, reckless behaviour to Harry. It wasn't exactly a secret that her and Sirius hadn't exactly gotten along...or even been close til now—ironically, when she was a mess now herself. Maybe she shouldn't have asked Sirius to stay here. What had she been thinking? Though she hadn't known where to turn that night and she was tired of staying nights at Harry and Ginny's crowded flat with a toddler crying at all hours.

Yet the truth was...she'd wanted to stay at Grimmauld Place, hadn't she? In the moment of her heartbreak, or perhaps liberation from Ron, she wanted something comforting, a second home, that brought back feelings of familiarity and better times.

How she wished she didn't feel so at home here in this familiar house. Yet simultaneously lonely and out of place because she slept alone.

She didn't miss Ron. No, she didn't. I don't miss him one bit, she told herself.

She just hated how empty the bed felt. How empty it felt to be sleeping alone instead of with her best friend and partner curling up behind her, his hand on her waist.

She'd miss that feeling of someone curled up behind her.

She wondered, with bitter tears, how long she would have to wait to enjoy that feeling again? The ease and reassurance of having someone you could both talk to anything about, then curl up in bed, spooning together...and then lovemaking day in and day out, whenever you struck a fancy...Never having to wonder when the next shag would come- they were always available and safe unprotected sex. Never having to wonder if you were loved—you knew. Never having to sleep in an empty bed...your partner was right there, always within reach. Never having to worry for your future...your future was them, with them.

She shed her last tears for the Hermione Granger Weasley who would never come to be. The Weasley-Granger red-headed kids that now would never come into existence. The Weasley family Christmases that would now be spent elsewhere. The new life...and existence she'd have to find instead. And you know what? This new existence might be fine too, she just had to start again.

She fell asleep with that reassuring thought. Though she hoped it wasn't long before she found it again and never shed a tear again over Ron Weasley.

~o~

A/N: Hmmm maybe Sirius could be that new person in her life? Or is Sirius too immature and his head stuck in his arse to stop being a playboy and actually have a serious long term relationship. Or is he hesitating because he knows he would hurt hermione if he slept with her

pls vote below if you'd like to see a sirius-ron fist fight or magic fight? :)