AN: Hello, everyone. I know it's been a while and I feel truly terrible about abandoning this story. I started it when I was a lot younger and more immature, so it was hard for me to get back into it - so, I decided to reedit it, because if I want to be a writer and can't manage to write fanfiction, I don't know what I am. Most of the main plot points are the same, but there are a few details that I have added in to make it feel more realistic to me, I suppose. The biggest change is that Tabitha is now part of their group (this happens in the edited Merlin, Help Me, I believe) and that I decided to cut the slumber party scene and instead make it a birthday party for Grace on Halloween, because I'm cheesy like that. For those of you who are still here, thank you - I know that I haven't been the easiest person to read, so I just want to share how grateful I am that you guys are still interested in this story. I'm hoping to post all of the chapters over the summer, since I have some more time on my hands, and I have some one-shots in the same universe planned, so hopefully I'll get those posted, as well. And, without further ado, let's get back to it!

Amanda was not kidding about throwing me a birthday party, and Hugo hadn't been able to stop her. He tried to explain that we needed to practice for our Quidditch match on Sunday and that throwing a party would throw us off our game, but Amanda refused to listen to reason. So, when I arrived back at Hogwarts, it was to Hugo's open arms and an apology that he couldn't save me. It had turned out to be less of a celebration of my birth and more a costume party used an excuse for the fourth years and above to get drunk and hook up with people, which was very much not my scene.

"Grace, hurry up!" I was in Amanda's dorm with her and Tabitha, who were both already dressed and ready. Amanda was wearing a really poofy pink dress and had designated herself to be a princess. Tabitha was wearing mostly-normal clothes, but had splattered them and her face with paint. And they were trying to get me to dress up like a cat, which I did not feel comfortable with. I was sixteen today. I stared at myself in the mirror. I was wearing all black - a black turtle neck with black jeans, black sneakers, and black cat ears, which were currently in my hands - and my hair was all purple again. I had dyed it myself this time, not trusting myself around Hugo. Being away had made me realize just how much I relied on my friends, and relying on people was dangerous, because people will always hurt you if you give them enough time. I didn't look any older and I didn't feel any older, but I still was a year older. It's funny - birthdays happen, whether you're aware of them or not. People are always changing, we just don't see it. My eyes didn't even feel like changing colors.

I sighed and put on the cat ears, slipping out of the bathroom. "Finally!" Amanda huffed. Tabitha just rolled her eyes. She was fidgeting with a paintbrush that she had decided to put in her hair. For decoration, she said. "Tabitha, do her makeup."

Tabitha gave a mock curtsey. "Yes, your majesty." Amanda swatted at her head, and I knew that she had accepted Tabitha as part of the group while I was away.

"I don't really need makeup." I had pulled the sleeves of the shirt over my hands, clenching them together. In another year I would be able to legally use magic outside of Hogwarts.

"Of course you need makeup! How else is anyone supposed to know that you're a cat?" Amanda shoved me into a chair and I winced. "Sorry, did I hurt you?"

"No," I mumbled. "It's just... if this is supposed to be for my birthday, shouldn't I get to decide how I spend it?"

"Amanda, she's right. This whole thing was supposed to be for Grace and now it's just turned into a whole wild party. I was there when you were setting everything up in the Joint Common Room - there's a ton of beer and strobe lights and loud music just waiting for us, which you know isn't Grace's speed. The least you could do is let her choose how she dresses." Tabitha's lips quirk as she takes note of my outfit. "Or, at least, if she wears makeup or not."

Amanda sighed. "Fine. Let's go meet the boys and head to the party!" She lifted her dress to reveal neat silver heels, before turning back to me. "And happy birthday, Grace! I promise we'll do something fun tomorrow." I smiled at her, but it quickly faded. I didn't want to push my friends away, so I was going to go to this party. I needed to keep them for as long as I could.

"Calm down, Grace," Tabitha whispered, taking my hand. "You don't even need to stay the whole time. Just long enough to say that you made an appearance."

"No one would know if I was there or not - and I'm wearing all black. No one will be able to see me!"

Tabitha grinned. "Your purple hair is a dead giveaway. And I know someone that will want to see you." I smile for Tabitha's sake, but my eyes flash silver anyway. Tabitha squeezes my hand. "Hey. You'll be fine. I'll stay with you the entire time."

We met the boys at the bottom of the stairwell and Tabitha released me to Hugo, going over to chat with Lorcan, who was dressed as a medieval pirate. He winked at me and blew me a kiss, which I returned. I turned my attention back to Hugo, who was wearing this ridiculous muggle's biker outfit with a leather jacket and red bandana. He grinned at me when he saw my costume. "You look really pretty." He flicks one of my cat ears. "Cute."

"I wish I could say the same about you," I said. "What are you supposed to be?"

He shrugged. "I'm actually not sure. I asked Rose if she could send me a costume. and this is what she chose. But it doesn't really matter what I wear - I look handsome in anything."

"I'm getting deja vu." I offered him an actual smile. I really missed Hugo - it scared me how much I missed him, but I couldn't help but feel calm when he was around. Except when he leaned forward like he's doing now and kissed my forehead - then my heart felt like it was going to pound out of my chest. I looked into his eyes, but he had already turned away. "Ready?"

"If I must be."

He laced his fingers through mine and I took note of the size difference. His hands were warm and I struggled to keep my eyes their normal stormy sheen. "I already have a proper birthday celebration planned, just you wait." He kissed the back of my knuckles and I tripped over my feet. "You okay?"

"Fine," I mumbled as we reached the entrance to the Joint Common Room. Amanda, who had skipped ahead with Tommy, who was wearing what I'm assuming to be a prince's costume, although it was hard to tell, opened the door to a blast of music and disco lights.

"Whoa," Tabitha breathed. "It looks even cooler at night."

"That's what she said," Lorcan grinned, which didn't really make sense, but Amanda didn't seem to be in the mood to criticize his poor taste. She had grabbed Tommy's arm and was looking at the room with unmistakable pride. She had put a lot of hard work into this party and it was paying off.

The decorations were insane - there were glow-in-the-dark bats that were swooping across the room, giant carved pumpkins, and smoke billowing over the bottom of the floor; there were trees of candy at the edge of the room and barrels filled with what I'm sure were banned substances, that were probably not on the approved drink-list that Amanda had submitted when she asked for permission to throw this party. There was also a half-arsed attempt at trying to remind people that it was my birthday, a small, hastily hung banner on the opposite side of the room reading, "Have a spooktacular birthday Grace," which was ridiculously cheesy. There were hundreds of students in the room, all dancing or playing one of the Halloween-themed games that Amanda had set up, a lot of them getting really into the glow-in-the-dark paints. And a lot of people were using the darkness as an excuse to kiss people they would never have the nerve to kiss in broad daylight.

I shifted my gaze to Hugo, who was already looking at me. I smiled and the six of us entered the room.

I immediately lost them in the crowd, except for Hugo, whose hand I was grasping like a lifeline. He pulled me through the room until we were adjacent to the pumpkins and he started swaying with me. It was too loud to properly talk to each other, so we settled for staring and swaying, which made me feel like I wanted to die of embarrassment. "I'll go get us some drinks!" he shouted over the music. I was shaking my head, but he had already let go and I was lost in a sea of people thrashing all around me. I could feel my heart in my throat. I just needed to stay calm. Someone jabbed an elbow in my side and I couldn't breathe. "It's okay," I muttered to myself. It's okay, it's okay. I waited in the same spot, but fifteen minutes had passed and Hugo still hadn't come back for me. I took a deep breath and a bat nearly slapped my face with its wings.

I took another breath and started to move through the dancers, trying to find an emptier space - the entrance was on the other side of the room and I didn't want to risk getting trampled. I inched my way towards the sofas, which were all shoved to the side of the room, and squeezed myself in between the armrest and a couple that was kissing each other in a way that was entirely too inappropriate for a public setting. I averted my eyes and watched the room, scanning for a familiar face, my nails digging into my palms. I didn't bring my sketchbook with me. I didn't have anything else to direct my energy towards.

I found Lorcan and Lily in the corner of the room - she had also dressed up like a pirate, and I wondered if they had planned it, or whether it was a coincidence. They disappeared into the crowd. Genie was dancing with a seventh year that I didn't know, and I quickly shifted my gaze, hoping that she didn't see that I was here. One of the girls next to me groaned and I cleared my throat. One of the girls looked up and I choked. "Tabitha?"

"Grace!" She grinned. I looked at the girl she was kissing - Roxanne Weasley. "This is my fake girlfriend, Roxie." Roxie kept kissing Tabitha's neck, her hands in a place I couldn't see. I was honestly shocked that she was continuing to maul Tabitha when I was right here. "Roxie, stop." But she kept moving. Tabitha looked back at me uncomfortably and shifted.

"Fake girlfriend?" I asked.

Roxie growled. "Don't use that word. You know I don't like that word."

Tabitha flinched. "I said fake, can you relax?"

"I know a way to relax," Roxie said, returning to Tabitha's neck. Tabitha pushed Roxie off, and Roxie finally got the memo, standing abruptly, nearly tossing Tabitha over. "You don't want to relax with me, fine. I know a dozen other people whose mouths are just as useful." And she stalked off, finding the nearest person and planting a kiss square on their mouth, which they returned with equal vigor and soon it was a new porn show with only one recurring member. Tabitha looked at Roxie, her jaw tense and eyes flashing with hurt.

I grabbed her hand and dragged her up. "C'mon." We slowly made our way across the room until finally finally we got to the exit. I pushed open the door and breathed in the fresh air of the castle, relieved. I remembered why I had come out when I heard a sniffle. Tabitha was speed-walking in the opposite direction from the Joint Common Room. I had to run to catch up with her. Finally, when it became too much, I grabbed her arm and dragged her to the end of the corridor, making her sit down with her back against the stone. Her eyes were red and her makeup had been smudged - I guess she forgot to put on the magical sealer. She rested her hands on top of her knees. "Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yeah." She let out a breath and I fanned my sweaty face, stripping off the turtle neck so that I was only in my white tank top. I hadn't even thought about my scars, but her eyes barely glanced over them - she probably knew because of her voodoo powers. She had tied her hair back again, which had come undone during Roxie's gropings.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Tabitha slumped down the wall and rested her head on my shoulder. After a brief hesitation, I laid the top of my head on hers and grasped her hand. She was shaking, but it couldn't have been from the cold, because the castle was pretty warm for an October night. "I'm supposed to be with a Weasley," she finally said, gripping my hand tighter. "I know I am."

"Your feeling?"

She snorted. "My parents think that Seers are flukes, that they don't exist. And maybe I'm not a Seer, but I'm... I'm something. I can sense, like, energies around people - I can tell what's supposed to happen and what could happen. Sometimes, I can feel what is happening. It's more complicated than people think... sometimes it's visions, but it's more like... a feeling." She lifted her head and looked at me. "Do you think I'm crazy?"

"You tell me," I joked, but she looked serious. "I don't understand Divination magic - I think it's one of the complicated disciplines because there doesn't seem to be so much rhyme or reason to it." I met her eyes. "I don't think you're crazy. But you might want to talk to someone about your abilities - it might make you feel better."

"Maybe." She rested her head against the wall, looking up at the ceiling like she could see through it, reading whatever the stars above us revealed. "Hugo's worried about you - he doesn't know where you've gone. But he'll find us soon."

We sat in silence for a few beats - I wondered if she could sense that or whether she just figured it out intuitively. I knew the answer in my heart, but it was weird to think that someone could tell the future - the future wasn't supposed to be decided yet. It made me feel powerless. "Can you not tell who you're supposed to be with?"

Tabitha turned her head toward me. "It's complicated," she repeated. "I know I'm supposed to be with a Weasley, but I can't tell which one. Some people are harder to read than others, and I have trouble figuring out my own future. Yours and Hugo's is pretty clear though - you guys overlap a lot. I'm not saying that I know what's going to happen in your future, but I have these glimpses of what could be or what is. It's not an exact telling of what's going to happen in the future - it's more when something is actually happening that I can sense it, and sometimes what's happened doesn't affect the other person yet. Like, with McGonagall coming and taking you away - I knew that was going to happen because it was already decided by her. And the stuff about the future I can piece together is more about energies than anything else, but that's harder for me to figure out." I nodded, trying to understand, but I still couldn't imagine it. Maybe the reason Tabitha and I became friends in the first place is because we both felt isolated - we both had powers that we didn't know what to do with. "I think it's easier to read people who are hiding something... or maybe that's just my imagination."

"But Hugo isn't hiding anything," I said. He couldn't be hiding anything. I told him my secrets, and he didn't trust me enough to tell me his? Of course it's on my birthday that I discover that my best friend (and possibly more) doesn't trust me like I trust him.

"Stop panicking, Waterrose," Tabitha said. "It was just a theory. If he is hiding something, I can't sense it."

I relaxed back into the stone, my freehand tracing the crevices, the other still being squeezed by Tabitha. "So, you're just going to go through every single Weasley until it feels right?"

And then we're both laughing hysterically. "Oh... Merlin," Tabitha giggled and then let out a sob. "What am I doing? I'm being ridiculous!"

"You're not being ridiculous. But maybe stop looking for who you think you're supposed to be with and just let it happen naturally."

She looked at me. "You're right. And you know what? I'm don't need a partner! I'm just going to be the best friend I can be. Mostly to you. The other guys don't need me."

My stomach tensed. There was that word that I had been so afraid to use: need. I didn't want to need my friends. But I was the one who helped Tabitha through her crisis, so maybe it was a two-way street. Maybe it was okay to need each other. "Equals," I muttered.

Tabitha squinted and then smiled her slightly-sinister smile that intimidated me the first time we properly met. "Equals," she repeated. "We both need each other." She laughed. "I feel like we're supposed to do a secret handshake or give each other weird nicknames that only we understand, or something."

"I mean, Tabby is cute."

Tabitha pursed her lips. "I mean... maybe. I don't know if I want to be named after a cat... Gray."

I wrinkled my nose. "Yeah, no. I definitely prefer Grace."

Footsteps filled the corridor and Tabitha squeezed my hand before getting to her feet. "Well, we'll have to come up with a secret handshake, later. I think someone wants to wish you a proper happy birthday."

She winked at me and I turned my attention to the redhead that was racing down the corridor. "Grace!" He came to a stop in front of me - he was sweaty and his hair was sticking to his forehead and his skin was flushed, but it just made his blue eyes stand out even more and, Merlin, he was beautiful. I shook my head - that's how I knew I was getting too tired. He looked at my bare arms, eyes sweeping over me, his eyes heated. I blushed, quickly putting back on my turtleneck, and his eyes snapped back to mine, barely a trace of guilt in them. "Where did you go? I was looking for you."

"I was busy forming secret alliances with Tabby," I said breezily.

He furrowed his brows and rocked on his feet. "Okay," he said slowly. "I'm really glad I found you, I was getting worried that you had been abducted by McGonagall again before I had time to give you your birthday present!"

"So it would be fine if I got abducted after you gave me my present?"

He gave an easy smile. "Oh, for sure." He held out a hand. "Can I take you somewhere?"

I nodded and he hauled me up from the ground. I was the one who let go of his hand - I just needed some space. He glanced at me, but continued walking beside me in silence. I listened to our footsteps and the slight hitch in my breath. I wrapped my arms around my waist. My hands were twitching and I kept thinking about what Tabitha had said. You guys overlap a lot. It made me even more nervous about my feelings for Hugo - I knew that Tabitha was trying to explain that her powers weren't determining the future, but it still felt like I was supposed to do something now. I couldn't imagine how Tabitha felt all the time, feeling like she was supposed to be doing something because of her visions. I sighed.

"Are you okay?" Hugo asked. His hand reached towards mine, but he didn't grab it. I knew that I was going to have to make a move, and I was too overwhelmed to take the support that he offered. I didn't want to need him - I was so tired of relying on everyone else to take care of my problems. "Is being sixteen just way harder?"

I gave a half-hearted smile. "Just thinking." I stopped suddenly. "Hugo, do you have any secrets?"

Hugo turned toward me, his blue eyes wide. "What? I mean, I don't think so. If I had any huge, ominous secrets, I would tell you." He studied my face, and I allowed my eyes to flash silver. "Why are you worried?"

"There's nothing you have to tell me?"

"Grace, what's this about?" I searched his face one more time and then continued walking. "Grace?"

"Nothing, it's nothing. Where's my birthday surprise?"

"Grace..." Hugo shook his head. "You'll just have to wait and see."

Finally, we got to a painting of fruit. "The Kitchens?"

"Don't knock it 'til you try it," Hugo teased. "The House Elves are all gone, but I'm friends with Limmy, and she said that as long as I cleaned up, I could bring you to the Kitchens tonight." He shuffled his feet again and then grinned at me sheepishly. "I told her that I wanted to make a cake for this pretty special girl and that she was a bit quieter, so it would be nice to have the Kitchens to ourselves." I opened my mouth, but he plowed on. "And, yes, I know that it's kinda weird that I talked to Limmy about you, but I couldn't owl my mum, she'd just tease me, and I needed help -"

"Hugo," I interrupted softly. "Thank you." And then I took his hand, intertwining our fingers until we were palm-to-palm. His hand was cold and a little clammy, but I wouldn't have let go for anything. Maybe I needed him more than he needed me, but I had never had someone care so much about me that they talked to a House Elf about me and that they set up a special birthday celebration. My family wasn't into birthdays, so I hadn't gotten any owls from my sisters or brothers - I didn't hold it against them, but it did feel good to be appreciated.

Hugo squeezed my hand. "You haven't even seen the surprise yet."

"Not much of a surprise anymore."

Hugo grinned. "Oops. Wanna see it anyway?"

I rolled my eyes. "Sure."

He tickled the pear with his free hand and dragged me in, the lights automatically turning on. My breath caught in my throat, and if there was any question that I was in love with Hugo Weasley, it was erased then and there. It wasn't decorated so elaborately, but there was a rose-shaped balloon floating in the middle of the room and a sloppily decorated purple cake in the center of the table, surrounded by presents and letters. "It's not chocolate, don't worry," Hugo said, rubbing the back of his neck.

I turned and wrapped my arms around his middle, resting my cheek against his heart. "Thank you," I repeated.

"I slept with a Little Mermaid stuffed animal until I was twelve years old." I leaned back, but he held me to his chest and continued talking. "Yeah, it was pretty embarrassing when my entire dormitory found me clutching a muggle mermaid doll in second year. They stole my doll and I couldn't sleep for months - I was so mortified, the only person I spoke to was Lorcan. Tommy was the one who got dirt on all the other guys in the dorm and threatened to expose their secrets if they bullied me about it again, and that's how I became friends with him and Amanda.

"As for any huge secrets, like me being a werewolf or having some crazy color-changing eyes, I don't have anything like that. But that doesn't mean that I don't trust you." He gently pushed me away so that he could meet my eyes. "You mean so fucking much to me. If I lost you as a friend, I wouldn't be able to function. I need you, Grace Waterrose."

I nodded, my eyes watering. I knew that they were flashing all sorts of colors, but I wasn't sure how I was feeling, so I let them fade back into their normal ice blue. "So, I'm your Little Mermaid doll?"

I felt his laugh across my cheeks and I closed my eyes. He leaned his forehead to rest against mine. "You're so much more than my Little Mermaid doll." We stayed like that, breathing for awhile. "Grace, I..." I opened my eyes. His eyes were closed, his eyelashes brushing against his cheeks. He had such long eyelashes. He rubbed his nose against mine. "Can I..." Then his eyes flashed open and he gave me a sideways grin. "Never mind. Gifts or cake first?"

"Gifts," I answered, goosebumps erupting over my skin, even under my turtleneck. I had more baggage, but that didn't mean that Hugo didn't care about me just as much as I cared about him. He said he needed me. My cheeks flushed. Control, I reminded myself. And then I realized that I didn't need to bother with control, because I trusted Hugo and he trusted me and maybe that was enough.

My sisters and brothers all wrote me cards, although Caleb's was more of a scrawl with his name written at the top of a bunch of squiggles. Lillian wrote a slightly cryptic card, but ended with her usual greeting to Hugo - she also sent a small bottle of vanilla perfume that I was probably never going to wear. Lorcan had given me a huge box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans, and Tommy and Amanda had chipped in together to purchase me a giant book of famous witches and wizards who had weird hair colors, which was an oddly specific gift and an oddly specific book to write in the first place. Tabitha had given me my present earlier, a book about how to seduce redheads, another oddly specific book. She had flashed that wicked grin and said, "Not that you need any help with that."

Hugo handed me a small box, his hand shaking slightly. "Here. It's nothing too fancy, but I just thought you might like it."

I opened the card first. Dear Waterrose, Happy birthday. It may sound bad, but I'm glad your parents don't realize how amazing you are, because it just gave me the opportunity to get to realize how fantastic you are. You're my best friend. Have the greatest day - you deserve everything. Love, Hugo.

I hid my smile and ripped off the wrapping paper. "Oh, wow, Hugo." Inside the package was a small book called Everything a Beater Needs to Know and a playbook. He had also given me a bottle of green hair dye, which made me laugh, and a simple gold necklace on which hung a small purplish crystal bludger. I looked up at him, shaking my head. "It's too much."

"Please take it. I'm trying to make up for years worth of birthday presents that I didn't get you."

"Hugo, I can't repay this."

"Duh. That's why it's a gift." I just looked at him. "Grace," he sighed. "Look, the books both used to be mine, and I have them memorized. The green hair dye is from me and Tabitha and it barely cost anything. And the necklace..."

"The necklace?" I prompted.

"I kinda made it."

"You made it?!" I studied the necklace more carefully, but it looked flawless.

He was rubbing the back of his neck again. "Well, I knew that you would get pissed if I got you something elaborate, so I asked Rose to send me one of her chains and then bought the crystal and sculpted it and strung it all together and did some metal work and magic and yeah. If you don't like it, well, I can't take it back, but I can try to fix it or something."

"It's perfect," I said. "Seriously, Hugo. This means the world to me." I fumbled with the clasp, and I could tell that he wanted to offer to help, but was too shy to do so. I think that Hugo wanted to kiss me earlier, but I wasn't positive. And he wrote "Love, Hugo," on his note. I wasn't sure what it meant. Plus, he made me strawberry cake, which was my favorite. It looked pretty ugly, but it tasted delicious.

Hugo didn't let me clean up - he said that birthday girls weren't supposed to do any of the work - and we walked back to the dorms, our hands clasped loosely together, my other arm filled with the first birthday gifts that I could remember.

When we got to the dorm, it was still relatively empty. It looked like the party was still going strong. I snuggled up into my bed, clutching my necklace. I smiled into the dark.