The following morning, the door of Nonnatus House swung open and in bounced a renewed-looking Sister Hilda. Having heard the front door, Sister Julienne headed towards the entrance hall at a trot.
"It's lovely to have you home Sister," Sister Julienne exclaimed, embracing her consoeur, all evidence of the previous evening's altercation having vanished, "you have been very much missed."
"It's nice to be free from the corporate carry-one I've been going through over the last few weeks," Sister Hilda replied leaning into the hug, the relief in her voice palpable, "when did such courses become so full of rigmarole and so devoid in compassion? In terms of content and towards its participants. Being under Mother Mildred's beady eyes at the Mother House has almost been pleasant by comparison," she added with less ferocity, "and, if you don't mind me saying, less eventful than what's been going on here," she continued, allowing her voice to trail off to stimulate a response from Sister Julienne.
"There is much to discuss before I leave for the Mother House," Sister Julienne replied, more gravely than Sister Hilda would have liked, "will you join me in my office? Once you have refreshed yourself," she added, having seen Sister Hilda's eyes dart up the staircase.
"Of course," Sister Hilda replied.
Having left her case in her cell and visited the bathroom, Sister Hilda skipped back down the stairs, and knocked on Sister Julienne's door. Sister Julienne appeared on the threshold and remarked, "since this will be your office for the next week, you better settle yourself in."
A hint of hubrism began to course through Sister Hilda's veins and her nobly carved cheekbones lifted. She hated to admit it, but she was relishing the opportunity to take charge of Nonnatus House again. This time at least, Sister Monica Joan had no excuse to disappear to the Outer Hebrides. What could possibly go wrong this time?
"I took the step of going to Buckle's newsagent and looking at the newspaper," Sister Julienne's voice brought her back to reality, "there is no commentary on last night's radio discussion, thus far."
Sister Hilda had already begun to fiddle with the contents of Sister Julienne's office. As she continued to rummage and rearrange, she replied, "It certainly made for a very interesting recreational hour at the Mother House. Mother Mildred will share her views when you arrive," she finished with the slightest hint of sarcastic drawl.
"I'm struggling to discern whether this week's retreat is fortunately timed or the reverse, especially with Nurse Corrigan's news to digest," Sister Julienne continued.
"You were hardly to know that her character references had been falsified," Sister Hilda reminded her.
"But I do now." Sister Julienne replied, "I also know we have a young woman under our roof who has the most unfortunate start in life imaginable."
"Ah, good, you've changed your tune," Sister Hilda thought as she began to rearrange the office's furniture.
"We must devise a plan," Sister Julienne continued, "and I," she remarked, replacing her chair, which Sister Hilda had moved, in its rightful place, "have no notion of what that might be."
In response to Sister Julienne's replacement of the chair, Sister Hilda let out a pained squeak and said, "Oh, I was going to put the chair round the other side of the desk so I can face the light," she added with a chirp.
"But if you do that you'll have your back to people as they enter, and if you're running Nonnatus House during my absence that is not the impression that I would like you to convey," Sister Julienne stated authoritatively.
Sister Hilda's face fell slightly, but decided that this was not a cause worth pursuing. Instead, she asked, "is there anything else I need to know before you go, Sister Julienne?"
Sister Julienne settled herself into her correctly-located desk chair and motioned to Sister Hilda to take the chair opposite her. The younger woman obliged. Sister Julienne thoughtfully stared at Sister Hilda for a moment, trying to formulate a response in her head. Eventually, she admitted, "We have all felt your absence dear Sister, though I suspect your absence has been felt more keenly by one particular member of the community."
Sister Hilda felt her insides squirm slightly with guilt. She deeply regretted having not reconciled with Sister Frances before she went away and it had been playing on her mind greatly since she left, but most keenly whilst she had been back at the Mother House for the first time without her. But a worthy reconciliation meant confessing to far more than she had the courage to do so. "How is Sister Frances?" she eventually asked.
Sister Julienne's face lifted slightly at Sister Hilda's astuteness before remarking, "She's been out of character, well up and down, whilst you've been away. She has at times been noticeably subdued, particularly after Cyril and Lucille's engagement party. And yet she was so excited about the preparations for it. The other nurses have remarked that she's been, well, not off, but uncharacteristically sensitive on certain matters. More so than usual. But then at other times, she's been stubbornly determined, fiercely independent, champing at the bit for the next task. I suppose she's been unpredictable."
"What sort of matters has she been sensitive about?" Sister Hilda asked.
"Those pertaining to matters of the heart," Sister Julienne murmured.
"Oh!" Sister Hilda exclaimed in surprise, "I, hmm."
"What is it Sister?" Sister Julienne asked kindly.
"We, um, had a, row is the wrong word," Sister Hilda began, "coming together, disagreement, no, neither of those things, really," she continued to fumble for her words, "a discussion we were having, well, became, touched a raw nerve. I lost my temper a little, I was upset, I was short with her. I, we, both, ended up in tears, emotions were running very high. I didn't have the opportunity to apologise to her before I left," she finished.
"Ah," Sister Julienne replied, "and what may I ask was the topic of this discussion?"
"It matters not now," Sister Hilda replied, "it was all in the past," she added, truthfully.
Sister Julienne sat motionless, staring intently at Sister Hilda, trying to fathom the meaning of her words. "That as it may be," Sister Julienne eventually continued, "but Sister Frances' uncharacteristic demeanor, whether caused by your actions or not, has implications for the present." Sister Julienne reached out and placed a hand gently on Sister Hilda's wrist before continuing, "she loves you, and looks to you for care and support when she is troubled. She has done so ever since she joined the Order, far beyond what most Sisters would with her Mistress of Novices. And having seen the two of you together I know the affection is mutual. If you pushed her away, regardless of the reason, it would have affected her deeply."
"I know she does," Sister Hilda confirmed sorrowfully, "and that was why we were talking that night. She always brings her thoughts and troubles and insecurities to me, and, that night, I was not prepared to be there for her. At least not as much as she needed me to be. I do see her as rather like a little sister," she finished.
Sister Julienne chuckled and said, "You flatter yourself Sister. Your enviably youthful complexion means that you may not look it, but we both know that you are old enough to be her mother."
A painful pang coursed through Sister Hilda's body in response to her Superior's words, but she managed to not betray the pain on her face. "I'll have a word with her," she confirmed.
"Thank you," Sister Julienne replied kindly, "This is a matter which I would like to see resolved prior to my return."
"It will be Sister Julienne, I promise," Sister Hilda confirmed.
Sister Hilda headed out of Sister Julienne's office and set off at a canter towards the clinical room, hoping to catch Sister Frances. She whizzed around the threshold of the door, sliding to a halt when she saw that Nurse Crane was the sole occupant of the room.
"Ah, Sister Hilda, you've, arrived," Phyllis remarked as Sister Hilda's shoes slipped on the tiled floor.
Steadying herself against the side, Sister Hilda attempted to shrug off her unorthodox entrance before replying, "Yes, here I am!" as chirpily as she could manage.
"Can I be of assistance?" Phyllis asked.
"Have you seen Sister Frances? Is she in?" Sister Hilda replied with a slight hint of desperation in her voice.
"I'm afraid not, I've just sent her off to a delivery in Lisbon Buildings," Phyllis replied.
Sister Hilda let out a frustrated squeak, stamped the heel of her shoe noisily against the tiled floor and shook her fists in irritation. Suddenly aware of Phyllis' reaction to her outburst, she composed herself, and looked suitably abashed.
"Are you alright Sister Hilda?" Phyllis enquired.
"Um, yes, sorry," Sister Hilda stammered, "just wanted to talk to her about something, it'll keep,'' she added, before disappearing out of the room with as much kerfuffle as she had entered, much to Phyllis' alarm.
Sister Hilda skulked back to her cell and flopped onto her bed, smiling in delight about how much more comfortable it was than the lumpy, sagging, thing she'd been allocated at the Mother House. Nurse Corrigan's news had changed everything. Honesty was the only way forward. Not everyone needed to know, and she did not want everyone to know, but the truth was required in order to reconcile with Sister Frances. That, and it would help her to learn, to understand. Not that she was too childlike to not understand on her own. But she, Sister Hilda, owed her this, and more.