Tongue-tied like we've never known

Two Ghosts, Harry Styles

The atmosphere around the two of them was completely unforeseen. She had assumed that it would be awkward between the two of them, embarrassing even, but that wasn't the case. Instead it seemed like the two of them were playing a fun, twisted game.

She waited for the awkward greeting the next morning, the blushing and apologies mixed with poor excuses but it never came. Instead, James grinned cheekily at her as he left his bedroom and hummed cheerily as he brushed his teeth. Lily felt frozen at first, shocked by his blasé attitude. She had thought he would want to forget about the night before, wipe their slate clean, out of mind and left to oblivion. But then James strolled out of the bathroom, his teeth freshly brushed, his eyes sparkling and he winked at her.

She almost swallowed her own tongue.

That was the exact moment she remembered how competitive James can be, she had just never thought to slide competition and flirting side by side. But obviously to James, that's what it was. James Potter's version of flirting was teasing, teasing competitively, waiting for who snaps first, who lunges first, who loses.

Lily was abuzz with anticipation and excitement. Competition was Lily's forte.

Lily had only started to grow confident with flirting, so at first she was a little unsure about her tactics. But it was handy having a best friend that was Hogwarts number one flirter.

"He what!?" Marlene squealed, as Lily recounted the night before.

"He was hard, Marly, he had an actual erection and totally knew I saw!" Lily was sure her face was bright red.

"He got hard just by seeing you in his jumper?"

"Well I don't know if that was it, he could have been thinking of something else, someone else" Lily mumbled.

"But then you took the jumper off, and you were wearing your pyjamas with no bra?" Lily nodded as Marlene repeated what Lily said only moments before.

"And you put his jumper back on?"

Lily nodded again, watching as Marlene tapped her fingers against the bed covers. They were both nestled between Marlene's pillows and duvets. Lily had promised Marlene a girls night, the two waiting for Mary to come back from her study club.

"Ok so he was still hard after you put the jumper back on?"

"Yeah...but I mean he did just see my boobs" Lily shrugged.

Marlene giggled.

"Oh Merlin Lily, he's totally into you still"

"Still?! It's been years since he last asked me out!"

Marlene rolled her eyes, making Lily clench her teeth.

"He's always had a thing for you. I mean you're hot, like super hot. All long legs and dark red hair. Every boy in our year has a thing for you"

Lily blushed, she hadn't realised the boys at school thought of her that way. She was horrible to everyone last year, and assumed they were all driven away by her crying and angry outbursts.

"I was pretty horrible to everyone last year, I don't think they fancy me anymore."

"Oh bollocks, we all still have eyes, and everyone can tell how much you've changed over the summer." Marlene tried to give her a small smile, a sympathetic smile, a smile Lily didn't particularly enjoy seeing from her best friend.

"Well, anyway. It wasn't awkward after you know…" Lily tried to steer the conversation away from her awkward and painful years of being depressed.

"After he eye fucked you and Sirius interrupted?" Marlene grinned, her usual mischief energy making her bounce on the bed.

"You think he was eye fucking me?" Lily gasped.

"Oh come on, have you never been eye fucked Lily?" Marlene chuckled.

"I don't think I've ever been just fucked " Lily mumbled, emphasising the word sharply and pouting slightly.

Marlene immediately burst into a fit of laughter.

"Was that muggle really that bad?" she said between hiccups of laughter.

Lily grimaced.

"Is everyone's first time bad? Because I literally just laid there until he was done. The kissing was...nice but it was kind of awkward during" Lily admitted.

Marlene patted Lily's knee.

"Sweetie, when you find someone you actually like it will be completely different"

"How do you know?"

"When you know, you know" Marlene wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Lily grinned.

"So Potter, he wants to fuck you. Do you want to fuck him?"

"Fucking hell Marly, you know I do. Didn't we establish that with the shirtless show you made me watch at Quidditch training?" She pushed her friend away from her in jest.

Marlene laughed softly.

"That was funny. Ok so we can clearly conclude he wants to fuck you, so why don't you just make a move?"

"What happened to making sure I don't hurt his feelings?" Lily asked, remembering the conversation they two of them had not long ago about her feelings towards James and how unsure she was.

"Lets just say I've been keeping an eye on you two and can safely say that you my dear friend do not have just a measly crush on Mr James Potter"

Lily raised her eyebrow at that.

"You, Lily dear, fancy the pants off him. As in, you care and actually like him. I know you Lily, you may have had your fun over the summer, stringing along guys, kissing whoever you felt like-" Lily frowned at this and went to defend herself before Marlene butted in "- wait! I'm not saying you can't do that! There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a little fun, trust me" Marlene winked.

"But- you like James. As in, you like him as a friend and you fancy him. This is real for you Lils, I've never seen you look so comfortable and yet so frustrated by someone before"

Lily stared dumbly at her best friend.

"How do you know it's real?" Lily asked quietly.

Marlene cocked her head to one side, as if studying Lily.

"Lils, be confident with your feelings. You need to trust yourself more."

"I know, I know. It's just been so hard to trust my gut since...Serverus and Petunia." She tried to swallow but a huge lump had formed in her throat.

"How can I trust someone else, if I can't trust my own feelings?"

Lily watched as Marlene digested her question. Her friend was the most honest person she knew, which was probably the real reason she had avoided this conversation for as long as she had.

"Have you ever tried just letting yourself be? Not thinking about why you feel the way you do?" Marlene asked wisely.

"What do you mean?"

"Right now, how do you feel about me? Do you think about what you say before telling me?"

"No, not really," Lily replied honestly.

"That's because you trust how you feel towards me. You weren't like that with me last year" Marlene stated.

Lily suddenly felt very tense and sore, like her muscles had simultaneously locked.

"I'm so sorry Marles, for how I acted last year. I was a terrible friend." She felt her eyes tear up and she gripped her thigh to help stop the tears from falling.

"Lils, you've already apologised. We understand that you needed to grieve. But you're ok now, and you've worked through those tough spots and now look at you!" Marlene pulled Lily's arms towards her and wrapped her arms around her shoulders.

"You're ok now. You have me and Mary, fuck you even have those stupid lads that call themselves the Marauders. They love you just as much. You have James."

Lily tensed at her friend's words. She wasn't used to having so many people care about her.

As if sensing Lily freezing, Marlene gripped her tighter.

"Now, I'm not saying you have to dive straight in with James. You can have fun, because honestly I think you deserve some fun. But I also think you should listen to your heart with him. He's real and he's honest, Lils. He's head over heels for you, and I think you are too."

Lily nodded into Marlene's shoulder, the tears now lightly falling from her eyes.

She sniffled unattractively before pulling herself from her friends arms.

"But he acted like nothing happened this morning?" Lily repeated.

Marlene grinned, her smile like a Cheshire cat.

"Lily, Lily, dear. There's one thing you should know about James. He loves to play, he loves to tease. I think now that he knows you're interested, he wants to tease you for as long as he can, before you snap."

"Snap?" Lily gulped.

"Before you jump! Cling onto that gorgeous body of his and ravish him whole" Marlene teased.

"I won't do that!"

"Won't you?" she winked.

"No!"

"Well then, I think you have to join his little game. Don't you? May the best one win"

Lily couldn't make her move straight away. It was the first Quidditch match of the season the next day, Gryffindor vs Hufflepuff. Which meant, James was otherwise occupied.

The girls had spent the entire night plotting and giggling, and Lily was now anxiously fidgeting next to Mary in the stands. They had given Lily all sorts of tips and tricks to tease and flirt James into submission, and now that Lily could physically see James, warming up in the air with the rest of the team, she felt silly and small.

She hadn't seen him that morning, she stayed hidden in her room as he used their shared bathroom and fumbled his way through the common room. She was hoping to get his attention after Quidditch, hoping Gryffindor would win and she could feed off the excitable energy that normally flooded the Gryffindor common room when they celebrated.

For now, she was being tortured by watching her crush, yes her crush, fly in the cold October air, his dark hair tousled from the wind and his cheeks an attractive rosy red. She tried to avoid the way his hands clasped his broomstick between his legs, she couldn't think like that right now. Instead she switched her focus to Marlene, watching her friend zoom around the pitch laughing as she threw a Quaffle Sirius' way.

Remus and Peter had joined them shortly after they arrived. Remus taking a seat next to Lily and chatting animatedly as they waited for the game to begin.

"You're chipper this morning" Lily stated, smiling at her friend. She hadn't seen him this lively in a while.

"Uh, yeah just slept well I suppose" Remus replied awkwardly, making Lily frown slightly.

"Sirius mentioned that he saw you and James look a little comfy the other day"

Lily frowned properly at him this time, but all it did was make Remus laugh.

"What has James said?" Lily demanded.

"Nothing! Seriously nothing!" Remus quickly said, noticing Lily's concern.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Sirius just told me he walked in on you two talking, said you looked quite friendly" Remus shrugged his shoulders, his eyes now watching his mates fly determinedly around the pitch.

"Right" Lily didn't want to talk about it with Remus. Remus knew the truth, and Remus was one of James' best mates.

She didn't want to complicate things already.

Not long after, the game finally started and Lily enjoyed herself as she watched her friends play gloriously against Hufflepuff.

The celebration was in full swing. A Gryffindor party for the ages.

Maybe being in their last year, the seventh years subconsciously made the celebrations extra lively as it seemed like the entire common room was stifled with magic and booze.

Lily had made sure to wear James' Quidditch jumper, the very one she had claimed a couple of days before. She knew it was going to make a statement to the rest of the house but whenever someone commented, she simply said it was a dare.

Her friends obviously knew better, but then again, it was their idea.

After the seventh person approached her and made a smart quip about the name on the back of her jumper, her temper started to get the best of her.

"Marlene, this is a terrible idea" she said tersely, gripping the neck of a bottle of wine tightly and pouring it sloppily into her cup.

"Lils, calm down. Ignore them. Remember why you're doing this" Marlene gave her a smirk worthy of the devil itself, automatically making Lily smile along with her.

"Fine"

The wine was helping. Making her thoughts slow to a fuzzy crawl. She was still waiting for the boys to join them, but she was always a nervous drinker and had already drunk a few cups of elvish wine.

"Where are they?" she mumbled.

"You mean, where is James?" Mary grinned behind her cup.

Lily nudged her with her shoulder and rolled her eyes.

As Lily tried to focus on the conversation happening around her, something about Dorcas Meadows inviting Marlene to the library, four boys spilled through the portrait doors. All four of them laughing and holding what looked like...more booze.

Instantly Marlene was squealing and running over to her friends. Lily and Mary followed, Lily trying her best to look nonchalant and poised.

"My baby boys brought me more booze - my saviours!" Marlene preened, grabbing the box of beer from Remus and giving James a kiss on the cheek.

"Baby boys?" he scoffed, his cheeks slightly red.

He looked utterly delicious, Lily thought. His hair was still deviously tousled and he had chucked on a clean Quidditch training shirt. The shirt looked a little small on him, but Lily wasn't complaining. It accentuated his broad chest gorgeously and even clutched tightly on his biceps. Lily tried her best not to stare, but after the few cups of wine she had already downed, she felt her eyes slipping and her self-discipline was almost non-existent.

Luckily she had her best friend Mary to keep her in check.

"Lily, " she warned under her breath.

Lily instantly averted her eyes and stared down into her cup, watching the bubbles fizz in her wine.

She listened half-heartedly to the group bragging about their adventures into purchasing the illegal beverages, and tried to keep her eyes either trained on her drink or on either Remus or Peter. She couldn't risk looking at James again and looking at Sirius was just a nightmare waiting to happen.

"Evans, are you wearing my jumper again?"

His voice was rough and made her shiver instantly. She hadn't expected him to address it in front of their friends, and found herself looking at James wide-eyed and gaping like a fish.

Marlene came to her rescue.

"That's what I said! But Lily mentioned that you let her borrow it and she wanted to show her support" Marlene didn't say whether she was showing her support for a certain player or just for Gryffindor.

James raised his eyebrows at Marlene before turning his gaze to Lily. His hazel eyes dropped lazily to her chest before meeting her eyes again. He smiled coyly before finally sorting the box of booze he had in his arms and handling out bottles to the group.

"Evans, you do realise it says Potter on the back right?" Sirius smirked, obviously thinking he was embarrassing her.

"Mhm, I think it looks rather good, don't you?" She smirked back, making Sirius lightly choke on the beer he had just tipped back.

James, on the other hand, had made his way to her side. She felt herself tense slightly at his closeness. He smelt like lavender and broom polish, an odd concoction but to her it screamed James Potter.

"You're right, it looks rather great on you Evans. Could get used to that" he whispered smoothly in her ear.

No one else heard his words, they had all turned their attention to Peter's attempt at chugging his second bottle of beer.

She tried to keep her smile small, but the corners of her lips tugged upwards automatically. She kept her eyes on the group, knowing that if she looked him in the eyes she wouldn't be able to look away.

"Did you wear this on purpose, Lily?" he said softly, so softly she had to release her eyes on Remus and Peter and check to see if he had said something.

He was still looking at her jumper, his eyes drowsy with something deep and heavy.

"I mean, you seemed to like me wearing it the other day" she said innocently.

Her eyes had drifted to his lips.

"You could say that" he said lightly, before tearing his gaze off her face and walking over to Sirius.

She watched dumbly as he acted as if he hadn't just been flirting with her, he was now shoving Sirius away from the box of fire whiskey, a large smile occupying his face.

She had her work cut out for her.

She needed to pick it up a notch.

She was careful with what she said around him for the rest of the night. The wine was making her slow down, and her thoughts were drifting borderline explicit. She didn't act on them though, instead she stayed away from him, always making sure someone was in between the two of them. Namely Remus or Mary, Marlene had started to flirt with an innocent visiting Hufflepuff, Dorcas Meadows and Sirius was trying to climb on the coffee table, claiming the surface was his inevitable stage.

"Ok, I think someone needs to take him to bed before he breaks something" Lily announced.

Remus chuckled but nodded, leaning forward to take Sirius' hand and pulling him off the table gently. She watched the pair head towards the boys dormitory, Remus' hand clasped gently over Sirius and Sirius whispering into Remus' ear. Lily smiled at the two of them.

She was so caught up in watching the pair that she hadn't realised she had been left alone with James.

"Ready for bed as well Evans?"

Lily blinked a few times.

"What?"

"Its nearly midnight, we should already be in our dorms, Evans. Look, I'll tell everyone to head to bed and then we can walk to our rooms together." he didn't wait for Lily to answer, instead he ushered Peter towards the boys staircase and shoved Marlene and the girls towards the girls dormitory. Soon after, the entire Gryffindor cohort followed, and the common room was empty.

"Ready?" He smiled.

They walked silently to their rooms. It wasn't even five minutes away from the Gryffindor tower, so before Lily could think of something to say they were taping on their door and entering into their empty common room. The elves had left their fire blazing, making the room instantly warmer than the hallway they had just walked through. With the wine and the fire heating her skin, she knew her face was probably an ugly bright red.

"Blimey, it's a bit hot in here" James muttered, immediately stripping off his training top and leaving him bare-chested and stretching.

Lily groaned.

How dare he just casually take his top off and stretch like that?

She narrowed his eyes at his bare back, an idea forming in the back of her wine-fuelled head.

She watched as James rotated his shoulders, eliciting small groans of pain and making Lily feel like her legs were going to collapse underneath her.

So Lily channelled her competitive side and shook herself from her drunk-induced filthy thoughts.

She lifted her head, pulled on a smirk and strutted towards her room. But before she reached her door, she took a page out of James' book.

She gripped the bottom of her jumper and pulled it over her head effortlessly (she was rather proud of this, being tipsy and all). She had no top on underneath, and she did this deliberately. Instead as she turned to say goodnight to James, she gave him a quick eyeful of her best black laced bra. His eyes were so wide she almost thought she was being a bit too bold and had gotten the completely wrong idea from James. But then, James shook his head in disbelief, a smirk growing on his lips.

"Night Potter" She smirked back, turning on her heels and closing the door behind her.

Two can play at this game.