It's a good thing that it's not a court day and that all Rey has to do for the morning is reshelf the files that were in court the previous day because she is distracted. She is in a state of anxiousness that is abnormal for her. She doesn't normally stress out about things after they've happened. Her philosophy is that there's nothing she can do to change it, so it just is.

But she told Ben a lot of messy stuff last night and now she's feeling exposed. She hasn't even given him all the horrible details, but he's heard a summary of her shitty childhood and now Rey is overcome with the worry that it was too much, too fast. What if Ben thinks that she told him all that to get sympathy? The thought makes her nauseous. She's never wanted pity or sympathy from anyone and she certainly doesn't want the person she's seeing to treat her gently because he's under the impression that she's fragile.

Rey is far from fragile. In her prouder moments, she realizes that she is resilient and strong and independent. But scraping away at her past reveals a lonely, vulnerable little girl who nobody wanted. She doesn't want Ben to treat her gently just because he knows she was a pitiful, neglected girl. He wants her to treat her gently because he cares about her now, the strong Rey, who doesn't need anyone, but desperately wants him.

That's another terrifying realization. She wants him. Of course, wanting him physically is really nothing new. Even when he was just an asshole that made her day harder, she still sort of wanted him.

Now, though - now she doesn't just want his mouth on hers or his hands on her skin. Rey wants the deep rumble of a chuckle when she's said something to amuse him. She wants his soft eyes and his mischievous smirks. She wants his boyish smile, the one that shows his dimples and his teeth - the ones that make crinkles at the corners of his eyes. She wants the kisses to her forehead, to her hair. She wants his undivided attention, like he gave her last night when she peeled back another layer of her carefully constructed walls.

She thinks she might want his heart.

Ben's day is turning out to be what his father would call a shitfest. It's another day where he's got hearings going on in two different courtrooms at the same time at the beginning of the day, followed by more hearings throughout the morning. He doesn't have time to eat lunch because he has to prepare for his afternoon hearings. Once those are done, he has two clients that he has to meet.

By the normal end of the day, Ben realizes he still has to prepare for court the following day, and curses when he realizes he will be working late.

He wanted lunch with Rey today, but that didn't happen. It looks like supper won't happen either. He texts her and tells her the situation.

He tells himself it's fine. This is still new and normal people that are testing the waters don't spend all their free time together. He knows it's normal for new couples (if that's even what they are) to only see each other once a week, especially when they have the kinds of careers that Ben and Rey have. Truth be told, he's probably already smothering the poor girl so he needs to back off a little.

He doesn't want to back off any though. He thinks about her all the time. When his mind isn't completely consumed with whatever case is in front of him, he finds himself wondering how he's managed to get this far with her. He had been so rude to her that first day. She didn't have to give him another chance. Rey would've been completely in her rights to tell him to fuck off forever. Somehow, they've made it to this point where she likes him too.

Ben can't figure out a time in his life when he's been so lucky.

He knows that he's only managed to squirm into her good graces because she has a good heart. Which is another thing about her that amazes him. Despite the things she's told him, she can still see the good in him people. Ben has a tendency to be pessimistic. He sees the worst in people first, and usually that's a good enough reason for him to stay away from them. If Ben had experienced what she had, he wonders how much worse his view of the world would be.

His phone buzzes with a text and, though he should ignore it, he checks it anyway because if it's from her, there's no way he's ignoring her.

Rey: Hey, can you come to the front door real quick?

Ben hops up from his chair and jogs to the locked front door. He turns the bolt and pulls it open. She's standing there, looking a little shy and a little sheepish. She holds out a white takeout bag.

"I got you supper," she explains as he takes the bag from her. "I didn't mean to bother you, but I was worried you'd forget to eat."

There's a blush creeping across her cheeks and Ben wants very much to pull her to him and kiss her senseless. Because he's glad to see her. Because she brought him food. But he knows if he does what he wants that he won't get anymore work done tonight.

Rey leans forward and pecks his lips. "Well, don't work too hard," she says, then gives him a bright smile.

She's already turned to go before he can manage a thank you.

Ben eats his meal alone. He works on his cases, silently cursing them because they're taking away from his time with her. He wants to text her, at least to thank her for the food, but he knows he would be setting a trap for himself to get pulled in by her and leave his work to fall by the wayside.

When he finally finishes and is satisfied with what he's done, it's already 8:30. He's lost his suit jacket by then, as well as his tie. He imagines his hair is worse for wear based on how much he's run his hands through it. He sighs and runs a hand down his face. He packs up for the night, shrugs on his coat, and locks up the office. He only lives a few blocks away, so he walked to work this morning. It's not much chillier now than it was then.

But when he gets to his building, he doesn't climb the stairs to his apartment. He hesitates at the front of the building, sees the people milling about outside the bar. Then, he walks back to the corner, around the building, takes the alleyway to the private parking lot and finds his car.

He should probably text her, but part of him wants to surprise her like she did him. She didn't text him until she got to his office. He can do one better by knocking on her door.

Ben frets the whole way over, worried that he maybe shouldn't do something so impulsive. What if she's already gone to bed? He knows that she doesn't usually go to bed this earlier, but what if she was extra tired today? What if she made plans after he bailed on her? He drives with one hand, while he chews on his other hand's thumbnail. He should've text her, but he's already nearly there now.

He pulls into her complex and curses when he can't find a space right in front of her building. It could be a sign that he wasn't meant to come here like this. He ignores that feeling and pulls into the first space he sees, which happens to be about three buildings over from Rey's. He grumbles and curses at himself, convinced that he's fucked up somehow already, but it's too late to turn back now.

He stands in front of her door, takes a deep breath, and knocks.

Which is stupid, really, because she has a door bell. He frowns at it. Tries to remember if he has rang it before or if he's always been an oblivious idiot that knocked instead of rang.

He hears the click of the deadbolt and then she's opening the door, her smile wide, but her eyes a bit disbelieving.

"I saw you through the peephole," she says, biting her bottom lip to try to control the smile.

She's wearing plush pajama bottoms decorated with penguins and an oversized pink sweatshirt. Her hair is a little damp and her face is scrubbed clean, freckles on full display.

She's so beautiful it hurts.

"Thank you," Ben says, a smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth. "For the food. Earlier."

Rey nods and he's feeling the full force of that smile again, all bright white teeth, and dimples, and the cutest fucking nose scrunch he's ever seen in his life.

He's still standing outside her door.

She clears her throat. "Is that...all you came here for?" She tries to make it sound like she's teasing, but he can hear the slight trepidation in her voice. Like she's afraid he'll leave.

Ben shakes his head and steps into her apartment. "No. That's not all I came for."

She raises an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"The main reason I came by was for a good night kiss," he shrugs like it's not a big deal. "I could send you a text to thank you for the food, but I can't kiss you through the phone so…"

"You know, there's a song about that, about kissing through the phone..."

She babbles when she's nervous, which is what she's doing now.

Ben fights the urge to roll his eyes as she goes on. His hands find her hips and he pulls her to him, dips his head to brush his nose against hers. He presses a slow, soft kiss to her mouth. He pulls away slightly. "Never heard of it."

She looks at him, a bit dazedly and says, "Heard of what?"

Ben huffs a laugh against her mouth and kisses her again, taking his time to taste her. When they finally pull away from each other, Rey steps behind him to close the door.

"So, you want to stay a bit longer and have some ice cream?"

And despite the fact that Ben does not particularly care for sugary treats, ice cream has never sounded better.

They sit across from one another at her tiny dining table, each enjoying a bowl of peanut butter cup ice cream. She's surprised he's eating it since he usually doesn't like sweets. It's one of Rey's favorites, but as delicious as it is, it's nowhere near as delicious as Ben looks.

He'd taken off his coat and draped it over his chair, and she notices that he's lost his suit jacket and tie. His shirtsleeves are rolled up just beneath his elbows, displaying muscular forearms. The buttons on his shirt strain with the effort of holding in his chest and she is a little sad that he's worn a tie so often that she's never noticed how put-upon those poor buttons are. Similarly, the material at his shoulders seems to strain as well.

Rey barely tastes the ice cream.

"I really do appreciate you bringing me supper," Ben says, pushing his bowl away. Surprisingly, he ate the whole thing.

"Like I said, I was worried you wouldn't eat. Or that you'd wait until you got home. It-it wasn't too presumptuous of me?"

Ben shakes his head and she watches his lips twitch as though he's fighting a smile. "What man isn't appreciative when his girlfriend makes sure he's fed?"

And suddenly she feels all warm and floaty and like she could laugh for absolutely no reason. She stares down into her nearly empty bowl, swirling the melted sweetness that's left with her spoon. "Girlfriend, huh? Now you're the one being presumptuous."

"You haven't protested yet," he says, and she can feel his eyes on her.

Rey finally gets the courage to meet his stare and there's nothing she can do to keep the smile off her face, out of her voice. "And I won't either."

The twitch of his lips gives way to a half-smile. "Good."

After the ice cream is finished, Rey follows Ben to the door, wrapping her arms around herself. She knows it's late, knows that they both have work tomorrow, but the thought of him leaving is unpleasant. He stops at the door, gives her one of those soft smiles that takes her breath away.

He reaches out, grasps the material of her sweat shirt and pulls her to him. His hands slide around her waist and his arms envelope her in an embrace. She uncrosses her arms and places her hands on his stomach, closing her eyes as she buries her face in his chest.

God, he smells good. And he's so warm. His arms around her feel so right. She tilts her chin up to look at him. His eyes are dark and soft and Rey is certain no one has ever looked at her with such affection.

She goes up on her toes and he meets her halfway, pressing his mouth to hers. Her arms slide up around his neck and she opens her mouth and runs her tongue along his bottom lip. He releases a shaky breath before touching his tongue to hers.

Rey doesn't think she will ever get used to how good at this he is. His tongue slides along hers, drawing little noises from her throat. Her fingers tangle in the ends of his hair and she presses closer to him, her breath hitching when she feels a hardness pressing into her belly.

She wants to touch him, wants him to touch her, wants to give him everything she has right now. His hands leave her hips, arms circling around her back and tightening.

"Ben," she breathes against his lips, "I don't want you to go."

He presses a quick kiss to her lips. "You need to get some rest."

"I'm not tired," she all but whines. "Ben, I want you to stay."

She pulls back a little to try and gauge his reaction, worrying that she's going to see a look of regret followed by a gentle let-down. Instead, Ben looks hopeful, looks seconds away from giving in with just the right amount of pressure. So she kisses him again with maybe a little hint of desperation, and then whispers against the corner of his mouth. "Please stay, Ben."

Before Rey can lean back to look at him again, he's hauled her into his arms, one arm tucked at her back and the other beneath her legs and Rey squeals, a little worried he's going to drop her. Her arms tighten around his neck and she looks at him, wide-eyed.

He grins at her, then pecks at her lips again. "I've got you," he assures her.

She relaxes in his arms as he peppers soft little kisses to her mouth and cheeks. She's vaguely aware that they're moving, but she's so distracted by the feel of his arms around her that she doesn't realize where they're headed until Ben turns sideways to get them through the hallway. He's headed to her bedroom and the knowledge of what comes next has desire pooling low in her belly.

They aren't very graceful as the clamber through her bedroom door, Ben bumping her into the frame since he refuses to put her down, but they laugh into each other's mouth at his clumsiness and Rey thinks she can take getting a little banged up as long as he's holding her. He doesn't bother flipping the overhead light on - Rey's lamp on her nightstand is burning and it's more than enough light to get them where they need to be. She half expects him to drop her on the bed, but instead he's gentle, laying her down so carefully before stretching out beside her.

He kisses her again and there are very brief words exchanged about protection - neither of them have a condom - but Rey is on birth control and both have a clean bill of health. And when that's quickly settled, Ben rolls half on top of her, pressing her into the mattress, one of his legs resting between both of hers.

His kisses are slow and deep and, though part of Rey wants to give into the desperation she feels to get him inside her, she talks herself down and lets Ben guide her. His lips are straight out of a fantasy - so soft and full and skilled as her presses kisses across her jaw, then finds a particularly sensitive spot just below her ear. Rey doesn't know where she wants her hands - they're alternately in his hair, framing his face, gripping his shoulders, and running up and down his back.

And at some point, Rey can't be still any longer. Of their own accord, her hips being wiggling, her body seeking friction for the pressure Ben has built inside her. His thigh seems the perfect place to alleviate the pressure. She moves her hips against him, gasping at the sensation it creates. Ben pants into her neck as she grinds against him and she feels his erection digging into her hip.

He pushes a hand beneath her sweatshirt, runs his fingers along the soft skin of her belly. Her muscles jump beneath his touch and her breath hitches. Her back arches as though she's begging him to move his hand elsewhere. And he does. His fingers skate along her ribs as he moves toward her chest, his hand engulfing her breast.

"Ben," she whines, her back arching again, pushing into his hand.

He works her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, pinching lightly. His lips are still working at her neck, sucking bruises into her sensitive skin. She turns her head and her nose bumps against his cheek. She presses kisses there, sweet things just to show him her affection, thank yous for making her feel so good.

He pulls away from her neck and before Rey can protest, he pushes up her sweatshirt and puts his mouth on her other tit. Her hands fly to his hair, holding him to her as he swirls his tongue around her nipple. He develops somewhat of a pattern - he licks, he closes his lips around it, and then grazes her with his teeth, before going back to a gentle lick.

It's driving her crazy. There's a fire in her belly and no amount of desperate grinding is going to get her where she needs to go this time. Ben seems to sense it too, because he lifts away from her and tears her sweatshirt over her head. He bends down, presumably to do the same to her pants, hooking his fingers in the waistband, but stops - and he just...stares.

His dark eyes drink in her small chest, nipples teased into sharp little points; they travel down to her bare torso, and he bends quickly to dip his tongue into her belly button.

"Ben," she gasps, her hips jerking beneath him.

He peers up at her with a ghost of a grin on his mouth, and then he tugs down her pants and panties in one go, tossing them behind him. Rey instinctively tries to close her knees, the cool air against her warm center making her shiver. Ben lays his hands on her knees, as though he's going to push them apart, but he's still dressed, so Rey keeps her legs locked and raises an eyebrow.

"You're overdressed," she rasps.

"Let me remedy that," he mutters, and begins working at the buttons on his shirt.

Rey sits up, intent to help so she can get him undressed as quickly as possible. She tears at his belt buckle, struggles only a moment with the snap of his slacks, and then reaches for his zipper. She can see the outline of his dick through his pants and God. What a sight. She takes a moment to trace its outline while Ben pulls his undershirt over his head.

He moans and thrusts his hips, chasing her touch and she grins as she peeks up at him.

"Trying to fucking kill me," he groans, running his thumb along her cheek.

"Maybe only a little," Rey whispers before leaning forward to kiss him through his trousers.

His head tips back and a tremor runs through his body. Rey grips the zipper and tugs it down, relieving some of the pressure he was feeling from the tight material. She gets up on her knees, and has her own moment of pause as she takes him in.

She knew he was a big guy, knew that he must have had muscles lurking beneath his fancy dress shirts, but this -

Ben is all pale skin stretched over hard muscles. He looks like he was cut from marble and Rey is stunned into inaction momentarily as she admires him. Her eyes lift to his face and he's just watching her look at him, his expression inscrutable. She palms him through his boxer briefs as she watches his face. His eyes are hot, black pools and his plush lips part as he hisses at her touch.

She has never thought of any man as beautiful. Rey's normal terminology doesn't usually even involve the word handsome. Her go-tos are hot and cute. And while Ben certainly is both of those, she realizes then that she finds him beautiful. His hair, his eyes, his nose, his mouth, and his body - he's maybe the most beautiful person she's ever seen and that revelation is what has her frozen in place.

She comes back to herself when he says her name, his thumb stroking idly against her nipple as he looks at her with mild concern.

"You okay?"

She nods and tugs at his waistband, indicating he should finish the job now. He stands from the bed, shedding his pants, underwear, socks, and shoes, and Rey finds herself just watching him again. Her gaze trail down to his hips and - and -

Her eyes widen and her throat goes dry because -

Ben is proportionate.

Maybe even not so much proportionate as blessed.

She lays back against the pillows, her knees bent and pressed together, her eyes shifting from his face to what lies between his legs as he crawls back onto the bed. He rubs her knee with his thumb as he studies her face.

"Are you sure?" He asks.

She nods, maybe a touch too enthusiastically, and parts her knees slightly. Ben's eyes flicker down and he works his jaw as he looks between her legs.

"Fuck," he says softly, like he's pained.

At the look on his face, she lets her knees relax, dropping them open and oh, it's worth it, worth the exposure to see the look on his face. He looks hungry, like he wants to eat her up. And before the thought can fully form in her head about what that might mean, he's on her.

He dips his head down between her legs and licks her from her cunt all the way to her clit. Rey's hips jump forward, her mouth falls open, and her fingers curl into the sheets at the sensation of his mouth on her. He doesn't slow at her reaction - instead, he dips back down and puts his tongue inside of her, licking away the moisture pooling there.

"You're so fucking wet," he mumbles into her skin, just before he trails his tongue back up through her folds.

Rey's body is beyond her control. Her hips are moving, tilting toward his face and she is only just barely restraining herself from grinding herself against his mouth. When he wraps his lips around her clit and sucks, her head tilts back and she moans, long and low., and her hips lift again.

Ben throws an arm across her hips and pushes them back down, shoving open one of her thighs with his other hand for better access. She feels a nudge on her opening, and then a slow slide of a thick finger and she gasps fuck yes.

"Goddamn it," he curses, his words muffled against her. "Jesus, fuck, you're tight."

Even as he says it, he's sliding a second finger and begins moving them. Not an in-out motion, so much as a massage, as though he's trying to open her slowly. All the while, his tongue works at her clit, and her labia, and occasionally dips down where his fingers are stuffed inside her. She whimpers when he begins to withdraw his fingers, her cunt clenching on emptiness - then he slides them back in, deep, and curls them just so.

She almost comes off the bed again, her lower body lifting as she pants his name. Then his mouth is back on her clit and he's sucking and working his fingers in tandem and Rey falls, mouth open on a stuttered gasp as she comes on his fingers.

She's shaking when he pulls his fingers from her and lifts his head to look at her, his mouth wet from her. He swipes some of it away with the back of his other hand before leaning forward to kiss her and why is it the fact that she can taste herself on his lips such a turn-on?

She takes his face in her hands as she sucks on his bottom lip. She can feel him, long and hard against her thigh. She reaches down and wraps her hand around him and he mutters yet another curse against her mouth. She swipes her thumb over the head, collecting some of the liquid gathering there, and brings it to her mouth, licking at her thumb.

Ben looks at her like she's killing him. He lowers his hand to his cock, gripping the base as he guides it between her legs. She can feel him nudging at the wet opening and she moves against him a little, letting the head of his dick slide up to her clit. She bites her lip hard to stop the moan trying to escape and looks up at him.

He's watching her in wonder, his breath coming in short pants.

"Please, Ben," she says, her voice a pitiful, broken-sounding thing.

"I've got you, sweetheart," he says, and he begins pushing forward slowly and it - it's a tight fit.

Rey breathes as her body stretches to accommodate the intrusion. Once the tip is notched inside, Ben snaps his hips and he bottoms out. And Rey is - she's full of him. He's touching every part of her - there can't be any room left for movement. She screws her eyes shut and wills herself to relax.

It helps that Ben is pressing soft, slow kisses into her shoulders, her collarbone, murmuring sweet words about how good she feels. She wraps her arms around his neck and kisses his mouth. She shifts her hips beneath him, opening her legs a little wider and Ben groans into her neck.

"Rey, can I move? Are you good? I need…"

"Yes," she whispers. "Please."

He pushes one of her legs up, her knee nearly touching her chest, and then he moves. And Rey watches him, his eyes fluttering as though he's torn between watching her face and closing his eyes. Sounds fall from her lips as he moves, beyond her control. The drag of his cock against every part of her is driving her crazy. Then, Ben's other hand slides beneath her hip and he tilts her just so, and then he's hitting a place inside her that she's sure no one else has ever found, sure no one else has been able to reach.

"God, you're so fucking tight, sweetheart. So wet. I'm going to think about this every second I'm away from you. How good you feel. Can you come on my dick, Rey? Can you do that?"

She can. She would've doubted it if he'd asked her before, but now she can feel it, that delicious pressure building in her belly, that tingling at the base of her spine that tells her she's close, so close to coming apart.

She nods, fighting to keep her eyes open and on his face because God, he looks beautiful like this. His jaw clenched tight, his teeth bared as he fucks into her. The muscles in his stomach tense and defined as they flex with his movement. And the sounds…

His hips snap into her harshly, his balls hitting her ass, making absolutely filthy sounds.

"Touch yourself," he commands, his voice even deeper than normal.

She reaches down between them and puts two finger tips onto her sensitive clit, pressing quick circles against it. It doesn't take long after that. It hits her like a jolt of lightning, like fire in her veins, and then she's coming, her head thrown back and her back arching off the bed as she grips his cock with her body.

"Fuck, fuck," Ben hisses, his hips speeding up, and then stilling at once as he empties inside her.

Ben's arms give out and he collapses on top of her, forehead pressed to hers. He's heavy, but she likes it. She kisses the tip of his nose, then his cheek, then his mouth. He pulls out of her and rolls over, and she instantly misses the feel of him inside her, the weight of his body on hers. But he pulls her into his side, wraps his arms around her, and lays a kiss against her forehead.

And Rey, wrapped up in strong arms, falls asleep almost immediately, feeling safe and sated and adored - maybe for the first time in her life.